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1288

When my girlfriend doesn't want to do stuff with me... (imgur.com)

submitted ago by HarryFrickinPotter

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[–]iTimmeh 82 points83 points ago

One day the girls will get older and miss the days when our boners would spring out of no where.

[–]Apostolate_waitress 27 points28 points ago

You are a poet.

[–]UhOhOreo2012 13 points14 points ago

Sooooo....date older girls?

[–]panda_handler 8 points9 points ago

If that's what you choose to take away, who are we to judge?

(Also, fuck yeah cougars)

[–]Whos_that_guy 9 points10 points ago

Fuck cougars yeah!* FTFY

[–]TimeTravelingCowboy 3 points4 points ago

Yeah fuck cougars!

[–]A_Mouse_In_Da_House 0 points1 point ago

I call bait!

[–]iTimmeh 1 point2 points ago

I dig the matures.

[–]Gracen 89 points90 points ago

My bf has never once in years been able to stifle a boner if we're laying together, whether we're about to nap or talking or any other non-sexual activity. Ever. It's kind of comforting in a way.

[–]technocr4t 97 points98 points ago

It's cute that you think he can control it

[–]Canna_bus 131 points132 points ago

"Hey penis, I'm kind of cuddling right now, and it would be pretty embarrassing if yo-"

"HEY GUYS!!! WOW WHATS UP YOU'RE LAYING WITH A GIRL? COOL. AND HERE I WAS THINKING YOU WERE GAY, XD. SWEET. MIND IF I JOIN THE CONVO?"

"P-penis, c'mon dude, not right now."

"NAH, ALREADY ACTIVATED YOUR BLOOD PUMPS LOL!!"

[–]pmsingwhale 49 points50 points ago

"Woah. I was just chillin' here until SHE shows up. I want in on this!"

"Penis, you want in on everything."

[–]jokinglikeawhore 12 points13 points ago

"Hey, I want in, just so I can let it all out."

[–]A_Mouse_In_Da_House 0 points1 point ago

"dude ask if she'll bring the dog too!"

[–]jokinglikeawhore -4 points-3 points ago

HAHAH

When I get home from work, I am tagging you as bestiality.

[–]A_Mouse_In_Da_House -3 points-2 points ago

I'm going to follow you for the rest of your days bringing that up. have a good one mate.

[–]jokinglikeawhore -4 points-3 points ago

Thanks, now I can relive that awkward moment(s) in my head over and over again.

[–]A_Mouse_In_Da_House -4 points-3 points ago

Which is why you lie about your past. Like I have

[–]TimeTravelingCowboy 1 point2 points ago

Penis.. you're kind of a douche..

[–]noodlez222 5 points6 points ago

Penis.. you're kind of a dick..

FTFY

[–]MyPocketsAreSoDeep 4 points5 points ago

The penis is strong in you my friend

[–]Martian_Mushrooms 1 point2 points ago

I like that the penis thinks there are blood pumps that make him big.

[–]please_please_smee 0 points1 point ago

Hey bitch you wanna suck on my tooth?!

[–]Gracen 18 points19 points ago

The fact that I stated that he "isn't able to stifle" should have been enough to imply my understanding of the lack of control that accompanies erections. Isn't able/is unable/cannot control.. all of that. I get how it works, no worries.

[–]cardinalcrzy 25 points26 points ago

Well that escalated quickly.

[–]langis_on 10 points11 points ago

What a boner killer that was...

[–]justmerriwether 1 point2 points ago

I see your side, but the way you say it makes it sound like you know he could, usually, but for you he just can't hold it back. I'm sure you're plenty special, really!!! But not that special. Boners are boners. :P

[–]aldude3 -1 points0 points ago

I hate it when I can't hide my boner when grinding.

[–]probablydurnk 3 points4 points ago

If he's over 25 then I'm impressed

[–]SirDerpingtonThe3rd 1 point2 points ago

My ex girlfriend from a while back used to get mad at me, thinking "you just want me for sex!" Sorry, my dick is basically in your ass cheeks minus a few layers of clothes, yes, it's going to do this.

[–]Thameus 31 points32 points ago

Don't apologize.

[–]DoctorDeath 24 points25 points ago

NEVER apologize!

(unless you're at a funeral)

[–]DoctorPainMD 13 points14 points ago

Even then, only if you're caught.

[–]pmsingwhale 4 points5 points ago

But you don't have to stop.

[–]rememberwater 3 points4 points ago

Don't apologise

[–]BeyondCR 5 points6 points ago

sorry Canadians...

..fuck

[–]bigbear816 1 point2 points ago

It's too late.

[–]meluckycharms123 28 points29 points ago

TIL men get boners around women.

[–]jokinglikeawhore 5 points6 points ago

It is just a rumor

*I forgot a

*ironically it was "a"

[–]moishew 12 points13 points ago

I'm sitting here with my girlfriend and she is convinced that I posted this.

[–]steaknfries 5 points6 points ago

This is so sweet.

[–]rghd 12 points13 points ago

Until you get a shrill gf whose response is "OMG STOP PRESSURING ME FOR SEX"

[–]nana_nanananananana 2 points3 points ago

Throw it back until it grows up

[–]deadgingrwalkng 6 points7 points ago

What if I'm the one who's always wet and he doesn't always wanna bone?

[–]OMNEG 3 points4 points ago

Better call Saul... or me... how you doin'?

[–]Ren_Hoek 6 points7 points ago

Never apologize for a boner.

[–]Manateen 0 points1 point ago

Oh god. I read the title as "When my GRANDMA doesn't want to do anything with me..."

[–]BlackberryCheese 0 points1 point ago

You have issues

[–]wtfitsvee 4 points5 points ago

I don't understand how some females don't like having sex. I was the one apologizing to my exbf for wanting to jump his bones every time I saw him.

[–]precaut1on 0 points1 point ago

You mean all girls aren't like that?... Oh my god, what am i missing

[–]wtfitsvee 2 points3 points ago

Not all are! But I've also learned that not all guys like having sex every time they hang out with their girlfriends (or every other time).

[–]rebooka 0 points1 point ago

High fiiiiiiive sistaaa. My boyfriend actually says I'm too sex addicted. :/

[–]Kqwizteen 3 points4 points ago

This is exactly how I feel when my boyfriend gets too tired. Only boner would be switched with snail trail.. or something along those lines

[–]justmerriwether 5 points6 points ago

snail trail

...

0.0

...

Oh my god.

[–]wartexmaul 0 points1 point ago

Jeez you just found out? Try watching porn with your naked GF while sitting on a black leather couch.

[–]justmerriwether 1 point2 points ago

No, I just...never thought to call it that...

[although my gf doesn't watch porn. if she did I wouldn't be on reddit. I'd be watching porn with her.]

[–]OnceIHadACookie 0 points1 point ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
Thank you for telling me that.... 212coms 1301pts 10dys WTF
So true for every guy in some point of his life 0coms 2pts 2dys pics

[–]Denver_Pole 0 points1 point ago

you go boy.. fucking reposts

[–]Downvoting_Deer -3 points-2 points ago

Relevent

[–]OnceIHadACookie 4 points5 points ago

Ditto

[–]Kman1121 -1 points0 points ago

Still hoping....

[–]Traniz 0 points1 point ago

So... We have to apologies if we find a woman is hot?

[–]empolean -1 points0 points ago

apparently

[–]kyle6655321 -1 points0 points ago

this is beautiful

[–]SassyKat -1 points0 points ago

Story of every man's life. WHY DOESN'T THIS HAVE MOAR UPVOTES?

[–]este_hombre 0 points1 point ago

When your gf doesn't wanna do stuff you make a sign? I guess that's a good allocation of your time.

[–]todbert1 -1 points0 points ago

I would always get turned on when I was laying in bed with my last gf (no matter how my day went or my mood).

[–]greym84 -1 points0 points ago

Harry Potter must not apologize for massive boner. Harry Potter must do something about it.

[–]Irlyh8usernames -1 points0 points ago

Every single day of my life... She wears something sexy, doesn't want me to touch her/touch me... She likes to make out, the second I get into it she want's to go to sleep and snuggle... Fuck my life... No seriously someone fuck me please.

[–]Gioware 0 points1 point ago

Is there template for these kind of "artsy" photos?

[–]Index820 0 points1 point ago

Why is this on reddit?

[–]Jinqs 1 point2 points ago

"do stuff with me..." makes me think you're 16, and that you ask your girlfriend, "Hey... wanna, like... DO stuff...?"

[–]_deffer_ 2 points3 points ago

Me and my wife are 28 with two kids... same vocabulary here.

[–]kenjura -1 points0 points ago

Let it be so!

(and if you get that reference, you are a sick, sick man, like me.)

[–]xVictor -3 points-2 points ago

Is this what /r/funny is?

Long lines of text on shitty black and white photos?

[–]gbCerberus 5 points6 points ago

Long lines of text

It's 99 characters. That's 70% of a tweet.

[–]Emperoricecream -3 points-2 points ago

yes. fuck this.

[–]ithouherenow5150 0 points1 point ago

how very flattering! i wish i could have that effect on a man. your gf is a lucky girl, and you a lucky man

[–]Ford6 -4 points-3 points ago

nice spelling, chief.

[–]sumebrius 3 points4 points ago

You should visit outside of the States sometime.

[–]willbegformore -5 points-4 points ago

Don't say you're sorry. It's a compliment.

[–]dezzrokk -4 points-3 points ago

I'm just so glad that I'm not the only one this happens to

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