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1115
1116

I don't think so buddy (imgur.com)

submitted ago by noisyturtle

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[–]lindberghbaby 258 points259 points ago

Is this facility? Power weapons only.

[–]marky_sparky 37 points38 points ago

Temple. Throwing Knives. Licence to Kill. No one can be Oddjob.

[–]wojokhan 3 points4 points ago

  1. Play as OddJob
  2. Hold Crouch button
  3. ????
  4. Profit!

[–]HipstersaurusRex 6 points7 points ago

its you. that one friend who has to be oddjob or you get upset.

you make me sick

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      [–]wutanggrenade 106 points107 points ago

      Fucking proximity mine the whole god damn thing!

      [–]goblinpiledriver 106 points107 points ago

      memorize spawns on stack

      license to kill

      proximity mines

      ...lose friends

      [–]Jisaw 70 points71 points ago

      We had a rule; you can't shoot an unarmed player. "PICK UP THE GUN!!" "NO! Go to the next room over first!" "PICK IT UP! NOW!" "You're being an asshole!"

      [–]HIVEvali 36 points37 points ago

      bringing back memories of diplomacy

      [–]Phlypp 6 points7 points ago

      I was part of a group that had to seriously curtail Diplomacy activity due to excess work time being spent on negotiations. We'd meet 3 times/week during lunch. When your boss tells you you're spending too much time on it, you are!

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        [–]butt_chocolate 18 points19 points ago

        Anyone who used Odd Job all the time was an asshole and blacklisted in our school.

        [–]Laeryken 9 points10 points ago

        Our battle cry was often: "OH NO, ODDJOB KNEELING!??!?!"

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                [–]pooticus 49 points50 points ago

                Hell in a cell, bunker, slaps only, meet in the jail cell and shut the door.

                [–]ninjason 39 points40 points ago

                Open the door, get on the floor. Everybody walk the dinosaur.

                [–]Arkyance 30 points31 points ago

                I've never been more proud of a link being purple in my life.

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                  [–]KCintheOC 7 points8 points ago

                  Stack. Proximity Mines. License to Kill.

                  or GTFO

                  [–]redgamut 4 points5 points ago

                  Well, knives only. But, yes.

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                    [–]pieguyfry22 549 points550 points ago

                    Is that...seriously what Slenderman looks like in the Slender game? I've never played it, but now that I see his model, boy am I disappointed. I expected a 7 foot tall unnatural mysterious man in a suit, not a 5'2" Gumby in a black turtleneck.

                    Come on, guys. That's not Slenderman.

                    EDIT: Hoo boy, I'll regret this in the morning.

                    [–]noisyturtle[S] 108 points109 points ago

                    It's not the model, it's the build up. Ever stare an Amnesia monster in the face? Not so scary. Hiding from one in a dark corner of a musty cellar? Bricks will be shat.

                    [–]ryebr3ad 117 points118 points ago

                    Say that to his face fucker not online and see what happens.

                    [–]snoharm 53 points54 points ago

                    Suddenly I realize I've never actually looked at one of them, only swept the camera past them in a panic.

                    [–]Coloneljesus 23 points24 points ago

                    I played though the entire game, then got to look at some artwork and that's where I first saw what they actually look like.

                    Everything before... I just knew they had two legs and a head. Probably...

                    [–]Daibuoxx 7 points8 points ago

                    They have such beautiful asses

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                          [–]KangarooLemonade 125 points126 points ago

                          Still in beta, I believe. You should make one and send it over to them, it'd be cool to see it improve.

                          [–]pieguyfry22 147 points148 points ago

                          Sounds good. I can finally put my Blender skills to work. I just can't stand poor Slendy not looking so, well, slender.

                          [–]KangarooLemonade 69 points70 points ago

                          I say go for it. You know, because I don't get enough nightmares playing this game.

                          [–]IndieGamerRid 17 points18 points ago

                          This doesn't actually seem all that scary. I haven't experienced it first hand, but I can't see the horror in what I've watched. Compared to other games in the genre this is about as horrific as Friendship is Magic.

                          [–]ezekielvander 47 points48 points ago

                          From experience, watching someone else is definitely NOT the same as playing it. Totally different.

                          edit:grammar

                          [–]Vendetta425 7 points8 points ago

                          watching day[9] play through Amnesia was pretty scary for me.

                          [–]starwarscreature 2 points3 points ago

                          I've played it, and it really isn't that scary to me.

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                            [–]ZippityZoppity 0 points1 point ago

                            Play it by yourself with the lights off sometime after midnight and tell me how you feel then.

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                              [–]theshinepolicy 6 points7 points ago

                              dude. this is disturbing.

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                                  [–]The_Stray_Wolf 14 points15 points ago

                                  I believe this was from a very old patch, they've updated his model a LOT since then as the game is now in 1.9.7 I believe. He actually looks more like slendy, and has tentacles after you see him a couple of times. (I've only played the game ~3 times, counting yesterday, so don't quote me on that)

                                  [–]Kaskademtg 2 points3 points ago

                                  I've only played the game ~3 times, counting yesterday. - The_Stray_Wolf

                                  [–]Afrid1 20 points21 points ago

                                  You honestly don't really see the guy for more than a fraction of a second anyway. I can tell you that I had very little sense what he actually looked after several rounds of playing the game.

                                  [–]AcronymEjr 25 points26 points ago

                                  Really? The first time I saw him a couple minutes into the game he looked so goofy that I had a hard time getting back into the spirit of it. It's a great little game, but the model really detracts from the experience.

                                  [–]unicornon 8 points9 points ago

                                  yeah. plus there was no lighting on him to make him slightly brighter at a distance for those creepy see-him-but-then-he's-gone moments.

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                                      [–]Heroshade 8 points9 points ago

                                      For one, he isn't even slender at all.

                                      [–]IlyichValken 5 points6 points ago

                                      Looks like a mannequin with noodley appendages (especially in day mode.)

                                      [–]OZZYROCKS98 2 points3 points ago

                                      You won't regret it in the morning. From all the lore I've read, he's supposed to be about ten feet tall with an extremely skinny body and long ass appendages. The Slenderman in Slender looks like a kid from Halloween.

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                                        [–]NormalStranger 1309 points1310 points ago

                                        aaaand Chuck Norris ruined it.

                                        [–]Terry_McGinnis 402 points403 points ago

                                        Chuck Norris isn't cool on the internets anymore?

                                        [–]kaiser_thovex 387 points388 points ago

                                        you know why there are all these jokes about Chuck Norris' badassery and none about Bruce Lee?

                                        because Bruce Lee isn't a joke.

                                        [–]BigSwedenMan 27 points28 points ago

                                        While that is a joke, it's also completely the case here

                                        [–]iRunTheMilitaryNigga 49 points50 points ago

                                        I'll take karate kid over chuck Norris at this point.

                                        [–]DutchmanDavid 3 points4 points ago

                                        The old one, or the new one?

                                        [–]PirateOwl 4 points5 points ago

                                        Either or.

                                        Edit: Added or.

                                        [–]asianfatboy 3 points4 points ago

                                        The new one wasn't even Karate...

                                        [–]Norrbotten 6 points7 points ago

                                        Karate? You mean the Dane Cook of martial arts?

                                        [–]DutchmanDavid 2 points3 points ago

                                        I haven't even watched it and I have the feeling I haven't missed a thing.

                                        [–]sr79 6 points7 points ago

                                        He brings with him 1000 years of darkness

                                        [–]Sourdough_Jack 1008 points1009 points ago

                                        He's a bible thumping, ignorant asshole, for that, we shun him. We look up to real badasses, like Bruce Lee.

                                        [–]HogoshaDaiX 726 points727 points ago

                                        Or Liam Neeson.

                                        [–]bacon31592 363 points364 points ago

                                        or Mr. T

                                        [–]Ryan_Firecrotch 257 points258 points ago

                                        Or Irena Sendler, a woman who saved over 2500 holocaust victims, then lived past 100.

                                        EDIT: I was wrong, read Jakestab's comment - she died at 98.

                                        [–]Varriable 174 points175 points ago

                                        Don't throw facts at us.....

                                        [–]Nihilism0 70 points71 points ago

                                        Name one disadvantage of learning something new.

                                        [–]Merrena 225 points226 points ago

                                        You learn something new.

                                        [–]purxiz 86 points87 points ago

                                        can't argue with that logic

                                        [–]FlappyTheNarwhal 29 points30 points ago

                                        Well fuck.

                                        [–]zaphod_85 18 points19 points ago

                                        Checkmate, atheists.

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                                          [–]MUSAFFA1 55 points56 points ago

                                          it takes up the space in my brain I was saving for the new episode of "OW! My Balls!"

                                          [–]sinister_exaggerator 19 points20 points ago

                                          Brought to you by Brawndo! The Thirst Mutilator!

                                          [–]ForgettableUsername 45 points46 points ago

                                          It actually improves you as an individual, but the downside is that you become more easily bored by the trivialities that make up the majority of most peoples' lives, so it makes you more out of touch with the people around you.

                                          At first you have an in with increasingly exclusive subcultures. Science fiction conventions, video games, and so on... but eventually even that starts to bore you. Who cares what commander so-and-so was really thinking in episode 23 of whatever it was. You're reading books by real philosophers and scientists now, struggling a bit trying to learn Latin and Greek.

                                          Eventually, ten or twelve years down the line, you've run out of friends who you can relate to. You go to parties, have a few drinks, only to end up sobbing in the corner about how nobody wants to discuss quantum tunneling or the history of the D'Oyly Carte Opera Company and, for God's sake, you're about 90% sure that nobody in the room even knows who Miles Davis is or where the Battle of Stalingrad took place. There's literally nobody to talk to about anything. You've become a monster.

                                          That's the disadvantage of learning something new. Be careful. Learn with caution.

                                          [–]mouschi 4 points5 points ago

                                          Who knew education was such a slippery slope?

                                          [–]theworldbystorm 3 points4 points ago

                                          You ever need to talk some operetta, you PM me, bud.

                                          [–]WhatsAEuphonium 1 point2 points ago

                                          It's okay, I know who Miles Davis is, friend (:

                                          [–]SROTW 3 points4 points ago

                                          Wow.

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                                            [–]Grindl 28 points29 points ago

                                            It slows down the seek speed for my brain.

                                            [–]TikiTDO 6 points7 points ago

                                            You should probably use a better storage algorithm.

                                            [–]mario1687 14 points15 points ago

                                            It replaces something you already knew.

                                            [–]MikeTheSpike 26 points27 points ago

                                            What's the boss order in Mega Man 4? I don't know anymore, thanks to Irena Sendler.

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                                              [–]kap3692 9 points10 points ago

                                              Effort.

                                              [–]AndoKillzor 6 points7 points ago

                                              My petite brain cannot handle this much knowledge.

                                              [–]TheMagicPin 3 points4 points ago

                                              LEARNING.

                                              [–]hoopopotamus 0 points1 point ago

                                              Zero sum game, I forget something I already knew.

                                              [–]thatssorelevant 0 points1 point ago

                                              Your brain pushes out an old fact to make room for the new one, unless it's stretched and was ready for the occasion.

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                                                [–]Nickdanger3rdEye 3 points4 points ago

                                                They have sharp corners and could hurt someone.

                                                Gentle hand facts to other people for consideration.

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                                                  [–]Jakestab 14 points15 points ago

                                                  Wikipedia says she died at 98.

                                                  [–]ForgettableUsername 21 points22 points ago

                                                  Which is basically over 100, if you factor in a 5% margin of error.

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                                                    [–]t3h_shammy 7 points8 points ago

                                                    so did liam neeson. god watch schindlers list.

                                                    [–]stereopump 7 points8 points ago

                                                    http://i.imgur.com/P9L0e.gif

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                                                      [–]TheLastBadger 52 points53 points ago

                                                      Or Mitt Romn-Waaaaaait a minute.

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                                                        [–]cjbasko23 4 points5 points ago

                                                        I hear Liam does his fair share of Bible thumping as well...

                                                        [–]HogoshaDaiX 11 points12 points ago

                                                        He's kind of like Steven Colbert when it comes to such things. He's not a dick about it.

                                                        Also this

                                                        http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/25/liam-neeson-convert-to-islam_n_1231424.html

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                                                          [–]Togdac 65 points66 points ago

                                                          I like Bruce Lee better because he beat Chuck in Return of the Dragon. Also because everyone seems to think Chuck is invincible.

                                                          [–]Elementium 69 points70 points ago

                                                          I prefer jackie chan.. I read that cracked story about his stunts and there is absolutely NO FUCKING REASON for Jackie chan to be alive.

                                                          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcOdI-pDEHI (skip to 2:50 for the fall..)

                                                          He did this 3 times for this scene.

                                                          [–]bulletbillx 23 points24 points ago

                                                          http://cinemassacre.com/2008/03/18/top-ten-jackie-chan-stunts/

                                                          http://cinemassacre.com/2008/05/06/top-ten-jackie-chan-fights/

                                                          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jaS8dUBUSI

                                                          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=em2pbLee3ZI

                                                          How does he friggin do it. I don't know how he's still alive, walking, and making action films.

                                                          [–]namesrhardtothinkof 12 points13 points ago

                                                          I've watched his interviews, and when asked about his injuries, he lists them all nonchalantly. My favorite part is when he pans down all his ribs and just says "broken."

                                                          [–]aStonedSquirtle 7 points8 points ago

                                                          Dude... I... I just... I just can't... Why is he alive?

                                                          [–]Jeroknite 14 points15 points ago

                                                          You remember that cartoon about him, Jackie Chan Adventures? All true. Collecting magical artifacts tends to make you immortal.

                                                          [–]PirateOwl 2 points3 points ago

                                                          I watched that show again more recently and I just couldn't do it. It had so much talking and no action and Jade's voice made me want to break televisions.

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                                                            [–]legrillsergeant 35 points36 points ago

                                                            Actually, only one of them walked off that set alive...

                                                            [–]uniquecannon 5 points6 points ago

                                                            Um, Bruce didnt die on the movie set, he died at his friends apartment. But his son, Brandon, died on the set of Crow. ME LUV FAKTS.

                                                            [–]RawrXD 4 points5 points ago

                                                            I think he was referring to the fact that in the movie, only one of them walked off alive.

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                                                                [–]Soulhunter4444 21 points22 points ago

                                                                Or Saxton Hale.

                                                                [–]AttemptedCrepe 5 points6 points ago

                                                                Mmmmmmmmmmmmm hats

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                                                                  [–]DfizzleShizzle 4 points5 points ago

                                                                  Bruce Willis.

                                                                  [–]fivepercentsure 2 points3 points ago

                                                                  my GF has the hugest thing for Bruce Willis... she says if he is the only man she would ever cheat on me with. I would let her...

                                                                  [–]Smithburg01 5 points6 points ago

                                                                  You can read the bible and not be an ignorant asshole you know, they aren't mutually exclusive.

                                                                  [–]Sonicpanda 28 points29 points ago

                                                                  And Clint Eastwood, right? Oh wait...

                                                                  [–]HabitOfCreature 46 points47 points ago

                                                                  Clint still kicks ass in my book. Who cares if I don't agree with his politics? His political views are vastly superior to Chuck Norris' insane, bigoted views. And unlike Chuck, Clint is actually artistically talented.

                                                                  [–]noisyturtle[S] 6 points7 points ago

                                                                  A message of hope and chairs.

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                                                                    [–]SkyeFlayme 21 points22 points ago

                                                                    Ya know what? I'm a christian, and I used to think Chuck was so cool, but then when he decided to do that video about how Obama had to get out of the whitehouse and calling on people to vote, and I had a chance to see how ignorant of a christian he was, it kinda ruined the whole Chuck Norris thing for me. Yeah, I have to agree. Bruce Lee for president!

                                                                    [–]thratty 12 points13 points ago

                                                                    Not trolling, not trying to stir up an argument, can you please show us evidence of him being an asshole? He seems like a very nice guy.

                                                                    [–]YoungSerious 46 points47 points ago

                                                                    He is considered an asshole because he is super religious, and has strong unpopular political beliefs. Before the downvotes come, I in no way indicate my support for his stances, just pointing out that they are very unpopular on reddit.

                                                                    [–]ThrillinglyHeroic 6 points7 points ago

                                                                    He's considered an asshole because of his anti-gay views(no gays in the boy scouts).

                                                                    [–]BF3FAN1 -4 points-3 points ago

                                                                    That's why I hate Reddit sometimes, they preach about having rights for Atheists and respect but when it comes to Christians they hate it. So when a Atheist comes on here they get respect but when a Christian(Like me) we get down voted because of the cirlcejerk.

                                                                    [–]zaphod_85 22 points23 points ago

                                                                    In general I would agree with this sentiment, but did you see that video of Chuck Norris talking about "1000 years of darkness" if Obama gets reelected? He's really gone completely nuts, if he wasn't before.

                                                                    Check out the insanity for yourself.

                                                                    [–]BF3FAN1 2 points3 points ago

                                                                    He's gone more nuts than Tom Cruise and he's pretty insane.

                                                                    [–]zaphod_85 2 points3 points ago

                                                                    I dunno about that one, I think 1000 years of darkness is pretty tame compared to the whole "alien spirits trapped on earth because of nuclear bombs/volcanos" shit that Scientology preaches.

                                                                    [–]Xeno234 38 points39 points ago

                                                                    He wants the bible taught in public schools, and opposes equal rights for gays. If that's what you think is deserving of respect then we'll have to agree to disagree.

                                                                    [–]Purdy14 6 points7 points ago

                                                                    A lot of it was to do with him wanting creationism taught and evolution out of education.

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                                                                      [–]wagdaddy 31 points32 points ago

                                                                      Its not a circlejerk, and they don't hate Chuck Norris just because he's christian. They hate chuck norris because he actively pushes an anti-science young earth creationist political agenda. This is directly at odds with what the nerdy science types who make up a significant portion of reddits population hold most dear. You're going to think its a circle jerk until you can get over your persecution complex and see what it is about the christianity being espoused that is causing it to be downvoted. It really isn't a matter of Christian = downvote 100% of the time.

                                                                      [–]BF3FAN1 0 points1 point ago

                                                                      Wow he hates science? I guess he lost another fan.

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                                                                        [–]lovesmasher 0 points1 point ago

                                                                        Yeah, we tend to downvote oppression.

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                                                                          [–]kingseed 16 points17 points ago

                                                                          He's got very regressive views on certain things. e.g. he doesn't seem to like gay people very much (he doesn't want gay people in the boy scouts, he doesn't think tolerance towards gay people should be taught in schools and he is vehemently against gay marriage).

                                                                          [–]Kzone272 7 points8 points ago

                                                                          Here

                                                                          [–]boodabomb 4 points5 points ago

                                                                          He's a homophobe. I'm pretty sure he came out in support of Boy Scouts' anti-gay policies and (I might be making this one up) ... Chic-fil-A I think? Also I was really pissed when he almost PG-13'd Expendables 2. He just sucks now IMO.

                                                                          [–]arthurconan 2 points3 points ago

                                                                          Basically, he spoke out against gay marriage.

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                                                                            [–]Vogey 1 point2 points ago

                                                                            You idiot, that's the whole point. He's not actually badass so we satirically treat him badass.

                                                                            [–]MemeBot420 1 point2 points ago

                                                                            whats wrong with being a christian? last i checked hes more well off than you, more successful, and more beloved.

                                                                            [–]drumstyx 1 point2 points ago

                                                                            Be water, my friend.

                                                                            [–]hostergaard 0 points1 point ago

                                                                            Apparently being a christian automatically makes you a bible thumping, ignorant asshole to atheist around here. Consider the irony.

                                                                            [–]roflocalypselol 4 points5 points ago

                                                                            Everyone says that, but no one had more respect for Bruce than Chuck, with whom he was good friends.

                                                                            [–]dalittle 0 points1 point ago

                                                                            you can watch Bruce kick chuck's ass in Way of the Dragon. Good fung fu movie in its own right.

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                                                                              [–]maxxusflamus 1 point2 points ago

                                                                              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wg14hRntRpg

                                                                              [–]Lewke 2 points3 points ago

                                                                              Chuck Norris was never cool. The jokes were sarcasm, taking the piss out of how awkward he seemed in a lot of scenes. Newfags came along and thought we were serious.

                                                                              Then Hollywood got wind and the expendables 2 happened, I think they get what we meant now. Lets hope that shit never happens again.

                                                                              [–]zeroGamer 3 points4 points ago

                                                                              They were Vin Diesel facts before they got twisted around into Chuck Norris, but noone ever remembers that.

                                                                              [–]SirDerpingtonThe3rd 0 points1 point ago

                                                                              No, something about gay people and Reddit's incapability to look past said beliefs for comedy's sake.

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                                                                                [–]TehBastage 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                This is clearly during the thousand years of darkness following Obama's reelection, when abnormally tall, masked government agents stalk the woods for those who refuse to be bound by the new, Obaman order of society.

                                                                                [–]IamTypingWithOneHand 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                Yeah, replace it with Liam Neeson and he will have my upvote.

                                                                                [–]B1ackMesa 1 point2 points ago

                                                                                My thoughts exactly.

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                                                                                  [–]nhoe1 146 points147 points ago

                                                                                  FALCON PUNCH

                                                                                  [–]BLACKdrew 57 points58 points ago

                                                                                  falcon PAAAUUUUUNNNNCCHH

                                                                                  [–]timhan 113 points114 points ago

                                                                                  SHOW ME YOUR MOOSE

                                                                                  [–]JDoe2014 56 points57 points ago

                                                                                  TU TU TU TU TU TU TU TU TU TU TU

                                                                                  [–]Ioncannon 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                  HYES HYES HYES

                                                                                  [–]TechGoat 0 points1 point ago

                                                                                  SHOW ME YOUR BOOBS!

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                                                                                      [–]SLE1995 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                      If only

                                                                                      [–]lambdaknight 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                      Am I the only one that thinks the tentacles on Slenderman is the most retarded thing ever? It instantly changes him from creepy, Uncanny-Valley-dwelling monstrosity to yet-another-hohum-"monster"-with-tentacles.

                                                                                      [–]AshuraSpeakman 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                      Well now I can't unsee it!

                                                                                      Whaarrrrrrrr look at me! I'ma scary ten-tackle man! Ooooo! Hide yo wife!

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                                                                                        [–]ramlol 21 points22 points ago

                                                                                        Does anybody have the link to the slenderman video where his roommate dressed as slenderman jumps out and scares the shit out of him when he gets caught?

                                                                                        edit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YngLdkfFexs

                                                                                        Hilarious.

                                                                                        [–]helarias 106 points107 points ago

                                                                                        "wonder how i can ruin a good joke..."

                                                                                        then chuck norris

                                                                                        [–]Enixcell 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                        What do we say to the Slender Man? "Not today."

                                                                                        [–]16bitgamer 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                        That was unexpected.

                                                                                        [–]Darkness62 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                        It's a video by Daneboe converted to a .gif. Should check out his videos they are pretty funny.

                                                                                        http://www.youtube.com/user/daneboe

                                                                                        [–]Dunkelz 235 points236 points ago

                                                                                        I'm that guy that makes Annoying Orange

                                                                                        And that was the quickest I have ever closed a tab in chrome.

                                                                                        [–]St_Orion 39 points40 points ago

                                                                                        Other than when your mom walked in on you watching porn?

                                                                                        [–]adilover 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                        I beg to differ

                                                                                        [–]davidlethal 72 points73 points ago

                                                                                        http://i.imgur.com/oEuue.gif

                                                                                        [–]SolairesApprentice 31 points32 points ago

                                                                                        The fucking fuck?

                                                                                        [–]brotatoe1030 34 points35 points ago

                                                                                        If you ever get caught, the only way to redeem yourself is to look them in the eyes and finish like a boss

                                                                                        [–]noisyturtle[S] 32 points33 points ago

                                                                                        Confirmed: Parents will knock every time after that.

                                                                                        [–]enjoytheshow 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                        It's a good strategy. There is no way they could muster enough courage to ever bring it up again.

                                                                                        [–]buffalosoldier221 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                        that gif is taken from a movie called "we need to talk about kevin".

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                                                                                          [–]limelight22 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                          I looked at the context and knew I would see this gif.

                                                                                          [–]Einchy 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                          That's so Kevin.

                                                                                          [–]Scarbane 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                          She keeps coming back into the room! Hasn't she learned anything from Arrested Development?

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                                                                                            [–]Grays42 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                            If I ever have a kid and catch him watching porn, I'm going to give him his fucking privacy.

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                                                                                              [–]ManBearTree 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                              Ha, that show is such a turd. I gave it a chance because it was right before Regular Show, but then I'm all "My ears are bleeding!"

                                                                                              [–]HeatherGee 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                              He's actually really funny besides his annoying orange videos.

                                                                                              [–]Irish33 51 points52 points ago

                                                                                              I can imagine, what, with the Chuck Norris jokes and all.

                                                                                              I bet he has a few funny things to say about arrows and knees, too.

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                                                                                                  [–]Heroshade 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                  It loses a significant amount of its comedic value when sound is added, particularly when any of those sounds are voiced by the guy who made Annoying Orange.

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                                                                                                    [–]Relient-J 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                    HE'S ALWAYS IN THAT GOD DAMN BUILDING

                                                                                                    [–]astrobot_3000 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                    I liked everything except the ending.

                                                                                                    [–]lesser_panjandrum 88 points89 points ago

                                                                                                    In that case come and join us in /r/masseffect, you'll feel right at home.

                                                                                                    [–]AshuraSpeakman 18 points19 points ago

                                                                                                    ZING!

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                                                                                                      [–]WantsNegativeKarma 31 points32 points ago

                                                                                                      Man, fuck reddit

                                                                                                      [–]dropperofpipebombs 1 point2 points ago

                                                                                                      Don't just FUCK Reddit. Take Reddit on a romantic dinner date, and really win them over. Over the course of the next few months, slowly win the absolute affection of Reddit. Make Reddit fall in love with you, make Reddit unable to imaging life without you. Eventually, once your relationship has reached the apex of perfection, tenderly make love to Reddit. Make Reddit want you. No. Make Reddit need you. Then you move away and never call again.

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                                                                                                        [–]Haphaz907 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                        Nuke it from orbit, it's the only way to be sure

                                                                                                        [–]stfnotguilty 65 points66 points ago

                                                                                                        Am I here in time for the HURRRRR CHUCK NORRIS HAS POLITICAL BELIEFS NOT IDENTICAL TO MINE AND IT RUSTLES MY JIMMIES circlejerk?

                                                                                                        Excellent.

                                                                                                        [–]LordBling 45 points46 points ago

                                                                                                        Extremely backwards and regressive beliefs, where he wants rights of a specific minority group to be less than the rest of Americans. Hence, the jimmy rustling.

                                                                                                        [–]EndlessIke 18 points19 points ago

                                                                                                        BACKWARDS and REGRESSIVE?????

                                                                                                        WOW, that's a lot of rear-moving words!

                                                                                                        [–]AshuraSpeakman 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                        Well there's a lot of moving in the rear, if you know what I mean. Anal rape

                                                                                                        [–]therunnerup 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                        A 72 year old man from the bible belt has some beliefs that a redditor generally would disagree with?

                                                                                                        Shocking.

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                                                                                                          [–]Snow_Cub 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                          I mostly dislike his jokes because they are old. I could give a shit about his beliefs.

                                                                                                          [–]weewoo92 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                          I could give a shit about his beliefs.

                                                                                                          So you still care about his beliefs?

                                                                                                          [–]Snow_Cub 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                          sure- about as much as my shit is worth.

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                                                                                                              [–]Rocket_Llama 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                              Really, what game is this? This looks fun :D

                                                                                                              [–]Whitebird551 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                              Slender. Enjoy...

                                                                                                              [–]Miles44 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                              they dont have mac version do they?

                                                                                                              [–]imasunbear 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                                              Yes they do.

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                                                                                                                [–]furyfight 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQRmDcAvjAQ

                                                                                                                [–]Nameisbrokicker 0 points1 point ago

                                                                                                                This is a game play by Chuck Norris.

                                                                                                                [–]niggerhomo 0 points1 point ago

                                                                                                                It's funny because Chuck Norris.

                                                                                                                [–]aidsrainbow 0 points1 point ago

                                                                                                                Lol'd out loud. GF woke up and got mad. Fuck you.

                                                                                                                [–]Wake_up_donnie 0 points1 point ago

                                                                                                                Really Chuck Norris jokes still.... fucking kids.

                                                                                                                [–]StephanFortin 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                                                Can we stop using Chuck Norris as the cool tough guy in memes?

                                                                                                                He's a homophobic, right wing douche, who actively lashes out against gays with his Boy Scouts for America ads.

                                                                                                                And in reality, come on, everything this guy has done just straight up blows.

                                                                                                                [–]aStonedSquirtle -2 points-1 points ago

                                                                                                                Why all the downvotes for this guy? Chuck Norris is a bigoted, homophobic douche. The fuck, Reddit?

                                                                                                                [–]Thimit 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                We all know this, and agree. There's downvotes because that is half of this thread, complaining about Chuck Norris. Downvotes =/= not agreeing.

                                                                                                                [–]AnxietyBug 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                For me it was his inclusion of "right wing" as though it is inherently evil.

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                                                                                                                    [–]Last_good_username 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                    This post made my day.

                                                                                                                    [–]MilaPoonis 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                    Replace Chuck Norris with David Schwimmer and this gif has my approval

                                                                                                                    [–]theGreenDay95 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                    another chuck norris joke. never gets old!

                                                                                                                    [–]ActionScripter9109 1 point2 points ago

                                                                                                                    Ouch. Looks like the sarcasm-impaired redditors reached you first.

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                                                                                                                      [–]Wizuhd 1 point2 points ago

                                                                                                                      I had already upvoted but then saw the Chuck Norris...

                                                                                                                      Not only is that a dead horse so beaten that it reincarnated just to die again... but Chuck Norris is actually a total piece of shit who couldn't even touch a real badass like Bruce Lee in a fight. Next time use him and not this inbred fuck

                                                                                                                      [–]Ghost_Basuta 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                      I wanted to like slender, but it wasn't what I expected. Slenderman didn't seem as subtle as I thought he would be.

                                                                                                                      [–]willyscoot 0 points1 point ago

                                                                                                                      That was Awsome. "ROUNDHOUSE"

                                                                                                                      [–]Jespar 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                                      Chuck Norris is a piece of shit.

                                                                                                                      I find myself offended this made the front page.

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