Dolphin rape?

This_Blood_Ocean · 2012-09-08T14:33:44+00:00

And thus, Michael Phelps was conceived.

punchthings · 2012-09-08T16:29:22+00:00

Dolphin rape is pretty common, but people always dismiss it like "aw what a silly dolphin!" Personally I think dolphins are assholes, and much prefer sharks.

xandernator343 · 2012-09-08T14:41:22+00:00

Stop it Dolphin, you are drunk and NO MEANS NO! Go home.

raoulduke666 · 2012-09-08T16:11:49+00:00

I remember when Hank Hill was raped

rocco888 · 2012-09-08T15:24:48+00:00

We all ain't nothing but mammals

Knuckledustr · 2012-09-08T17:09:48+00:00

Dolphins consistently rape, kill, and attack for no reason other than they want to. Why? Because they are fucking intelligent. There's plenty of stories of dolphins raping swimmers [shit you not], or killing baby seals just for fun, or even each other, just because they were bored.

Ouizardus · 2012-09-08T15:57:33+00:00

It's not rape if she wants it, and she seems pretty into it.

DustyName · 2012-09-08T18:09:10+00:00

When a dolphin does it it's funny, but when I do it I get arrested.

shamu2893 · 2012-09-08T14:50:47+00:00

Actually dolphins rape divers all the time

angry_squidward · 2012-09-08T16:59:34+00:00

this video is so old, it was even on an SVU episode once. They used it to blackmail a judge for having "animal porn" on his computer

iLeo · 2012-09-08T18:31:45+00:00

I'm amused more by the fact that the people are stepping away instead of helping her than by the actual dolphin rape itself. Also, AMA request: Victim of dolphin rape.

Expects · 2012-09-08T16:15:14+00:00

There is no denying that sexual pelvic swing all us mammals do.

Toucan323 · 2012-09-08T18:40:05+00:00

Relevant

Brian_Warner · 2012-09-08T18:46:05+00:00

In case anyone was inspired, here is a link to a step by step guide on how to have sex with dolphins: http://www.sexwork.com/family/dolphins1.html

Naryn_Tin-Ahhe · 2012-09-08T19:09:21+00:00

Sometimes whole pods of dolphins get together and rape things as a communal activity.

Podraping: very fast, very dangerous.

alephxero · 2012-09-08T17:49:56+00:00

Flipper? I barely know 'er!

stuihe · 2012-09-08T18:11:23+00:00

Relevant: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlaZis3KQl8

Conclusion? Dolphins are assholes.

McMeanface · 2012-09-08T16:55:48+00:00

Dolphins are the frat boys of the sea.

timoleon · 2012-09-08T10:19:54-07:00

Doesn't look like rape - she's laughing ...

Hristix · 2012-09-08T17:27:23+00:00

Careful, one might decide to vivisect you and plant a tree in your corpse so you can take your honorary place among the rest of their dead.

A-r3d · 2012-09-08T17:42:25+00:00

OMG! Did anyone else notice that the woman turns into a man when her head touches the plate?

Scrotesmcgoats · 2012-09-08T17:33:51+00:00

What's the porpoise of this??

mike808hawaii · 2012-09-08T16:43:40+00:00

...and you feared sharks? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVBuM3FBjiA

dblpt11 · 2012-09-08T17:37:09+00:00

This might help. Humans against dolphin rape

freeloder11 · 2012-09-08T18:25:35+00:00

More people are killed from dolphin rape each year than from shark attacks.

optimism96 · 2012-09-08T12:39:33-07:00

So that's how Snooki got pregnant

karpenterskids · 2012-09-08T21:22:49+00:00

The best part is that you can see the look on her face as it changes from "surprised" to "I'm being raped by a dolphin, aren't I?"

ExplodingUnicorns · 2012-09-08T21:46:57+00:00

If it were to come down face to face, I think I'd rather be around a shark than a dolphin.

RedditsKittyKat · 2012-09-08T16:47:07+00:00

Dolphins are scary.

http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2009/05/13/dolphins_are_violent_predators_that_kill_their_own_babies.html

t-shirt-party · 2012-09-08T19:51:54+00:00

I never seen a dolphin and a whale having sex before...

SilentSacrifice · 2012-09-08T09:10:59-07:00

That canned squeak they always used in Flipper was just dolphin for "SURPRISE!"

Jn1135 · 2012-09-08T17:27:24+00:00

Dolphin rape is common. Their penises can penetrate your bathing suit.

MrDoubleE · 2012-09-08T18:28:15+00:00

She looked to be enjoying it...

radiofreebc · 2012-09-08T11:57:21-07:00

He looks happy.

FartOnToast · 2012-09-08T12:40:33-07:00

Well dolphins to gang rape humans. It is known!

AP3Brain · 2012-09-08T19:45:33+00:00

I think I read somewhere that this place actually teaches the dolphins to do that as a trick. They aren't actually excited and trying to reproduce.

I have heard of actual horny dolphins attacking though.

vegibowl · 2012-09-08T19:55:39+00:00

God I hate dolphins. I worked for Club Med, this little bastard molested guests all the time.

Mariahflores100 · 2012-09-08T20:00:14+00:00

Rape sounds violent . I think surprise sex suits this situation better.

TheAmericanGinger · 2012-09-08T13:00:30-07:00

yes indeed.

GreatBigPig · 2012-09-08T20:01:53+00:00

That's what wearing Eau du Squid perfume will get ya.

SirMixOccasionally · 2012-09-08T20:10:43+00:00

aaaaaaaaaaaand suddenly "dolphin rape" is in my search history. I hate this site.

DuckSake · 2012-09-08T13:23:19-07:00

Somebody needs to replace the pic of the rape sloth as a pic of a dolphin

jutct · 2012-09-08T20:29:15+00:00

Dolphins have rape caves. In the ocean, they'll drag a person underwater into their rape cave and gang rape the drowned body.

nuffced · 2012-09-08T20:29:55+00:00

No penetration, just a dry..er um, wet hump.

markohfive · 2012-09-08T20:32:27+00:00

Im a dolphin attorney, if anyone know this dolphin please contact me.

That_dolphin · 2012-09-08T13:43:42-07:00

I swear she gave consent

jglee1236 · 2012-09-08T21:03:05+00:00

Your honor, the sex was clearly consensual. The video tape evidence, exhibit B, clearly shows the plaintiff giggling and enjoying the experience.

Faisal600 · 2012-09-08T21:05:36+00:00

I wonder if she was laughing cause it's too small?

doeldougie · 2012-09-08T21:17:36+00:00

It's not rape if she's dressed like that.

mystikarts · 2012-09-08T14:18:18-07:00

Naw, that shit was consensual. Look at her smile.

badphish94 · 2012-09-08T21:19:13+00:00

Doesn't look like legitimate dolphin rape to me.

ReadyPower · 2012-09-08T14:20:32-07:00

Once you go dolphin, you never go back

dumnezero · 2012-09-08T21:22:53+00:00

Was this legitimate dolphin rape?

masumaxx · 2012-09-08T21:23:16+00:00

It isn't rape if you like it...

VicRattlehead · 2012-09-08T14:27:47-07:00

Bullshit, she liked it.

redromina · 2012-09-08T21:34:03+00:00

Here's the video.

Glalies_Pajamas · 2012-09-08T21:39:38+00:00

you think that's bad. I saw a manta ray have sex with a enploy at the aquarium.

MK1992 · 2012-09-08T21:52:02+00:00

http://i.imgur.com/ccDz8.jpg The story of dolphin rape caves.

Wolvenblood · 2012-09-08T21:53:56+00:00

She clearly wanted it.

CptnCanuck · 2012-09-08T22:00:51+00:00

Relevant

theunderscoreguy · 2012-09-08T22:01:39+00:00

What are you? A gay fish?

Axd0231 · 2012-09-08T15:03:29-07:00

Don't show this to republicans,.

ybrik222 · 2012-09-08T15:04:44-07:00

I'm pretty sure it was more of an attempted rape, judging by the look on the woman's face.

TheRealMonster · 2012-09-08T15:08:21-07:00

It's not rape if she's enjoying it...

code_makes_me_happy · 2012-09-08T22:12:16+00:00

Well, MAYBE he was trying to prevent sliding back into the water?

zombiesatemylife · 2012-09-08T15:20:36-07:00

So that's who got snooki pregnant

Sinthemoon · 2012-09-08T22:20:58+00:00

Looks like consent to me.

Allenzilla · 2012-09-08T22:25:36+00:00

lol sure they laugh when a dolphin does it but I get maced...

The_Urethra · 2012-09-08T22:26:09+00:00

I think the Dolphin yelled "Suprise!" in Dolphin language so technically its not rape.

I_live_in_a_trashcan · 2012-09-08T22:36:09+00:00

This reminds me of the roosterteeth podcast when they talked about the woman being attacked by the dolphin that wanted to have sex with her so she gave him a handy.

ihatecats18 · 2012-09-08T22:40:49+00:00

This is a repost⁶

superdeedapper · 2012-09-08T15:45:41-07:00

This is cool but not r/wtf. Its just funny.

jrengle · 2012-09-08T16:04:53-07:00

Not legitimate rape.

wilbursaurus · 2012-09-08T23:11:18+00:00

Dolphins rape, on average, 14 humans a year.

tvlamptvlamp · 2012-09-08T23:14:37+00:00

Don't worry -- her body will reject the pregnancy.

-- Republicans

MrIslander · 2012-09-08T23:46:35+00:00

He just wants dolphin hugs!

LiteweightPhenomenal · 2012-09-08T23:59:47+00:00

This is even funnier with a beat bumpin in the background

spar8919 · 2012-09-09T00:03:15+00:00

and thats how Aquaman was created

7trXMk6Z · 2012-09-09T00:30:21+00:00

dophins are notorious rapists and have been known to drag humans to underwater caves where they gang rape people to death.

Dead_Music · 2012-09-09T00:43:41+00:00

It's not rape because she enjoys it.

ZymosisTheAlien · 2012-09-09T01:37:32+00:00

http://i.imgur.com/TFYCa.gif

LotharVw · 2012-09-09T01:39:20+00:00

Well at least she won't get pregnant. Thanks rape!

theamplifiedorganic · 2012-09-09T01:43:32+00:00

Legitimate Dolphin Rape.

FTFY.

xxthemattxx · 2012-09-09T02:03:39+00:00

I've had this image for a long time and it's finally time to post it in proper context. http://imgur.com/tHKGl

baalsitch · 2012-09-09T02:34:41+00:00

DAE notice the dolphin was holding her hips with his pectoral fins while he was thrusting?

shpensha · 2012-09-09T02:38:42+00:00

To be fair he got excited when he smelled fish.

ringpiece21 · 2012-09-09T02:58:09+00:00

This re-post legitimately raped me.

EmeraldGirl · 2012-09-09T03:00:11+00:00

You should check out the story of Margaret Howe and Peter the dolphin.

Over the course of two months, Margaret lived with Peter in a half-flooded house, attempting to teach Peter to communicate. During that time, Peter became sexually attracted to Margaret. As his attraction grew, he became sexually aggressive and unwilling to work on his communication skills. Manual stimulation leading to orgasm allowed Peter to re-focus on his lessons.

tl:dr; Don't give handjobs to dolphins.

ChappyWagon · 2012-09-09T03:04:43+00:00

It would appear so. I love how victims of dolphin rape just laugh it off or ham it up in front of the camera, like it's funny that they're allowing a fucking dolphin to hump them.

It is, though, I guess.

limeymarie · 2012-09-09T03:33:26+00:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfcIkU7aOR8 relevant

knightofcookies · 2012-09-09T03:44:38+00:00

These are all over my town. So the legends are true.

Bluetiles · 2012-09-09T04:07:11+00:00

Zeus was feeling frisky!

cufish · 2012-09-09T04:24:19+00:00

When this guy does it it's all laughs and giggles, when I do it I get arrested.

SignatureSeries · 2012-09-09T04:32:05+00:00

Oh, sure.. A dolphin does it, and it's on reddit. But i do it once...

Googalyfrog · 2012-09-09T04:37:49+00:00

yeah, dolphins rape a few people a year and are generally notorious for being sluts. My marine biology lecture told us this story of his friend who runs one of those whale watch boats. There is also this pod of male dolphins (can't remember which species) that also live in the area as the whale watch. Often there is this one female from another dolphin species that comes by and starts having sex will all the males in the pod. The red faced tour guide then has to answer all the tourists questions about why the two different species of dolphin are mating.

xXxBluESkiTtlExXx · 2012-09-09T04:50:45+00:00

Dolphins actually do rape people. I saw it on Manswers, so it must be legit, right?

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