When i find my crush is bisexual

shallow- · 2012-09-07T16:33:13+00:00

Bisexual doesn't automatically imply somebody into threesomes.

Jinxy_Minx · 2012-09-07T15:21:13+00:00

I am a bi-sexual girl who is, currently, dating a man. I never date two people at once, and I hate threesomes. I've done two, and I dislike them. My current boyfriend assumed that, because I'm bi, I would love them. He thought it would be a 'perk' of dating a bi girl. If I had known he thought that so heavily I doubt I would have continued on with the relationship to this point.

That might make me sound like a bad person, but he's so bummed about not getting to do a threesome.

Seriously, it annoys the living hell out of me.

Bluedemonfox · 2012-09-07T15:36:38+00:00

Some of my friends think being bisexual is very perverted because they sleep around with everyone and can date more than one person at a time which really confuses me and I just don't understand their reasoning. They are just normal people like everyone who date the same as homo or hetero people ....the fact that they say they are ok with homosexuals makes their dislike for bisexuals just more confusing.

Basic_Subhadra · 2012-09-07T16:02:22+00:00

Huh. As a bisexual, I can't help but think of all the times that a person (stranger, acquaintance, etc) that finds out I'm bisexual and immediately says "Can I watch?" "Can I join?" "That's hot." Etc.

My sexuality is something that I had to struggle with, was kicked out of my family for, and is something intensely personal. There is also a huge difference between being bisexual and polyamorous. Many bisexuals are not going to want a threesome just because they have the capacity to love both men and women. That said, some bisexuals are indeed open to polyamory, but making that assumption is probably a really bad idea. We have people calling us sluts often enough that you might lose your chance right then.

I encourage all of you to think for 2 full minutes (just two minutes of your life) about what being a bisexual is actually like. In these two minutes, see how many times your brain jumps to sexualizing a bisexual's life. Now refocus and think about getting comments like mine, or if you are a man, being treated like you're not a real man, like you are automatically weak or feminine, and having friends not treat you the same. Think about what your family would say.

I liked this gif at first, because I thought it was posted by r/bisexual. It is by far easier to date another bisexual because we understand each other. The gay and lesbian community often will fear we will end up leaving them for a member of the opposite sex and that we aren't "real queers" because we can "pass" for straight. And the straight people more often than not marginalize us as queer or sexualize us and erode our individuality and personhood.

Thanks for letting me rant. I love all you crazy redditors, and know that you did not post this gif with any malintent.

what_comes_after_q · 2012-09-07T15:49:21+00:00

Well, bisexual does not need to mean equally attracted to both. It also doesn't mean ravenous sex addict. In the same way you may not take it too kindly when your GF asks you for an MMF with your hot friend, even if you yourself were bi, you can't expect your GF to feel otherwise.

dan20791 · 2012-09-07T16:58:59+00:00

As a bisexual guy, the reaction from girls is almost never this :(

whenitistime · 2012-09-07T14:57:05+00:00

you realize you just doubled your competition right?

agentup · 2012-09-07T15:44:55+00:00

All my experiences with bisexuals their biggest pet peeve about their sexuality is that people, usually guys, think it means the girl will be out every night picking up random girls and it will lead to wild threesomes with hot girls

But analyze the situation for a minute. Even if you found a girl like that. It would not be long before jealousy tore your relationship apart.

twistedfishhook · 2012-09-07T15:30:20+00:00

bisexual =/= polyamorous. How old are you?

trunicated · 2012-09-07T17:14:53+00:00

$20 this is a 14 year old.

Phillile · 2012-09-07T16:02:59+00:00

She's not going to make out with other girls just to titillate your horny male self.

Choo41 · 2012-09-07T14:16:09+00:00

Never thought I'd see David James on r/funny.

Take from this, by the way.

lipsheutz · 2012-09-07T16:26:05+00:00

Bisexual girl here, I can vouch that is the look I get whenever I tell a potential boyfriend i'm bi and have had a girlfriend before.

Anarke13 · 2012-09-07T17:31:35+00:00

Most guys just seem to read "would also fuck a girl together with you" in bisexual. Most girls doesn't seem to wanna fuck her boyfriend and some random dude. Why should she wanna add a random girl?

ketralnis · 2012-09-07T17:33:07+00:00

So you're, what, twelve?

miker37a · 2012-09-07T14:35:44+00:00

Guys dont use the word "crush" do they? I thought it was reserved for Teen magazine articles.

rohirrim · 2012-09-07T17:19:23+00:00

As a bi girl, every time I tell a guy I'm bi he zones out for a few seconds. I've learnt to identify this as "the threesome look".

Kniepic · 2012-09-07T16:53:59+00:00

TIL OP is a misogynistic, ignorant douche.

impulsinator · 2012-09-07T15:27:13+00:00

This is very relevant, because last night I went on a first date with a girl and we coincidentally bumped into her ex girlfriend, and thats how I found out she was bisexual

Devon64327 · 2012-09-07T15:59:34+00:00

According to RES, OP is a "Reposting Cunt."

RES's words, not mine.

tehbertl · 2012-09-07T16:00:31+00:00

/r/reactiongifs

All_Witty_Taken · 2012-09-07T09:30:41-07:00

As a bi person I find the only thing is I have one more thing I have in common to talk about with my boyfriend. TITS.

1millionaccounts · 2012-09-07T20:56:26+00:00

I want to see the gif when your bisexual girlfriend left you for a woman who respected her sexuality.

mindaika · 2012-09-07T20:57:25+00:00

MFW I realize that tweens on reddit still think being bisexual means people are looking for MFF threesomes:

ಠ_ಠ

TheEvilLordZedd · 2012-09-07T15:49:34+00:00

Yeah, that's what I thought too...stupid me. As a straight male who recently came out of a relationship (4 years) with a bisexual girl (50/50) I can tell you, it's not easy. Nothing against bisexual people, this is actually a really rough situation for them (being 50/50 bi) and it is best illustrated by the fact that when talking to my girlfriend during the time when we were monogamous- she became sad and started crying once when I made an off-handed (half-joking) comment that she might as well be straight now because we were in it for the long haul. The thought that she could never be with another girl upset her greatly. Fast forward and we began an open relationship that turned into a poly situation. She had two girlfriends during the time we were together.

The truth is, you might think it's cool because "threesomes all the time WOOOO" but that isn't the case. I did participate in threesomes (not really my thing it turns out) but the bulk of my relationship was me taking my jealousy, ripping it out of my brain, and throwing it away- never to be seen again.

ochtapas · 2012-09-07T19:01:47+00:00

Just because a person is Bi does not mean that he/she will not be monogamous. Orientation does not drive fidelity.

cacheton · 2012-09-07T08:48:03-07:00

Calamity James himself!

grungevalue · 2012-09-07T17:09:14+00:00

I'm a bisexual girl, and though I also hate threesomes/am not polyamorous, I'd have to say dating a bi girl has other perks like fantasizing about the same girl as your partner, sharing opinions about random cute girls in the mall, etc.

beanielove · 2012-09-07T11:25:56+00:00

Wait, is OP a man or woman?

Dick_Serious · 2012-09-07T15:19:54+00:00

Men don't use the term "crush" so I assume you are a teenage boy and in that case good luck with that whole threesome thing.

I bet it will be super fun.

WubU2 · 2012-09-07T15:51:28+00:00

Plot Twist: Op is gay.

IrrelevantLeprechaun · 2012-09-07T15:32:10+00:00

Back in my highschool days, tons of girls labelled themselves bisexual. Most of them only did it because they wanted attention, and then ended up exhibiting no interest for the same sex. It's kind of pathetic, really, and forms a bad reputation for legitimate bisexuals.

sufficientlyadvanced · 2012-09-07T15:26:25+00:00

When you find out that they ignored you for someone of the opposite sex:

schniggens · 2012-09-07T06:54:34-07:00

Does that happen a lot?

Belgarathwolf · 2012-09-07T18:02:10+00:00

Actually pretty fun dating, because then you can still talk about other attractive women!

thisfreemind · 2012-09-07T18:33:51+00:00

This is even better when you're gay and you find out your assumed-straight crush is bi.

mysupersecretsn · 2012-09-07T22:56:44+00:00

I think I have a semi-accurate summary of this thread:

Being any sort of GSM is difficult. Coming out of the closet about it is difficult. Ignorant shit like this is part of what makes it so difficult, because people assume:

Oh, you're bi!? Score! Threesome incoming!
You're pan? Yuck, have some standards.
You're ace? You just haven't met the right person.
Oh, you're poly? Score! Threesomes AND all the guilt-free cheating I want!
You're anything other than cis/hetero? Oh, so you were abused, right?

(GSM or Gender/Sexuality Minority is easier to type than LGBTIHQ which also leaves out Asexual, Aromantic, Biromantic, Demisexual, Polyamorous, Swingers, Open relationships.....)

tl;dr - it's not about you

Watchman304 · 2012-09-07T11:31:27+00:00

I remember learning that about my (ex) girlfriend. It's not as great as it sounds. Granted, that might have been because she was a cheating whore, but who knows.

mattaoyo · 2012-09-07T17:11:53+00:00

Am I the only guy that wouldn't care of my girlfriend slept with girls?

As long as it didn't detract from the love we shared, nbd. It's not like any girl can offer what I do, and vice versa.

potentialfriend · 2012-09-07T16:58:11+00:00

"When i find my crush is bisexual" implies this is a common occurrence. How many times has this happened to you?

Shamyrock · 2012-09-07T15:19:50+00:00

Watching your girlfriend make out with girls gets old fast, trust me. Two of mine liked to do it....got quite awkward when they found each other.

redsha · 2012-09-07T09:02:03-07:00

i made a short film about this years ago - here it is. It's 10 mins, but here it is - all set to Holst... I was a strange kid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zXgzhHSob34

pinheadd · 2012-09-07T16:04:08+00:00

My last girlfriend who said she was bisexual ended up actually being a lesbian.

I can't blame her. Women are awesome :P

Butlaa123 · 2012-09-07T09:32:46-07:00

First gif I've seen of David James.

JaronK · 2012-09-07T10:38:28-07:00

I realized recently that over 90% of the girls I've slept with were bi. Just happens to be that way, I guess.

Kibethy · 2012-09-07T11:09:35-07:00

Dem cheekbones.

gkiltz · 2012-09-07T19:03:33+00:00

There's a huge difference between a crush and a serious long term relationship. That said, why does it matter?

zlo2 · 2012-09-07T13:25:15-07:00

How often does that happen to you, OP?

aristrofl · 2012-09-07T20:57:27+00:00

I've never had a non-bisexual girlfriend. It's just a ploy bro/broette. It's just a sales pitch.

ShouldveDiedInNam · 2012-09-07T22:30:05+00:00

I dated a girl the was bi and I will tell you this. I would rather deal with ex-boyfriends than ex-girlfriends any day.

ryko25 · 2012-09-07T22:46:04+00:00

dogshit

gJonny · 2012-09-07T23:23:14+00:00

David James, lunatic goalie.

jacobovicz · 2012-09-08T00:04:20+00:00

As a gay male, I'm exactly like this, because it means my crush is into guys as well :3

Cyberslasher · 2012-09-08T03:33:14+00:00

Just stay away from her. You will turn her asexual.

funny

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