this post was submitted on
1,321 points (53% like it)
11,277 up votes 9,956 down votes

funny

subscribe2,397,384 readers

16,257 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 91 comments

[–]MrIslander 78 points79 points ago

I miss this guy. I know beating up whores is socially frowned-upon, but I miss hip hawking his magical cleaning cloths.

[–]Durango_bob 43 points44 points ago

The Shame-Wow holds 10 times it's weight in shame.

[–]emperornibble 3 points4 points ago

Oh, they're for masturbating?

[–]ScarlettTakesATumble 39 points40 points ago

I don't know why everyone freaked. He just cleaned her clock.

[–]gulpeg 9 points10 points ago

Until the ho was shticky no mo!!

[–]MrIslander 2 points3 points ago

Could a been worse! Its not like they found blood-soaked Shamwows and a dead hooker somewhere. actually, think of how efficiently they would soak up blood!

[–]Knight-Solaire 5 points6 points ago

You slap a chop, you slap a stripper. What's the difference right?

[–]undergroundmonorail 4 points5 points ago

"Be like Vince and slap your problems away!"

[–]Nizzler 14 points15 points ago

You're gonna love his nuts

[–]Nolif3gam3r 0 points1 point ago

The hooker obviously didn't

Edit: stripper not hooker my bad

[–]arthurardvark1 5 points6 points ago

I miss Billy Mays also...

[–]ashmo_nicole 3 points4 points ago

I DONT CARE WHO YOU ARE, WHEN YOU HEAR THE NAME BILLY MAYS YOU GET EXCITED GOD FUCKIT!!

[–]Neosilver 5 points6 points ago

BILLY MAYS HERE

[–]Okamifujutsu 1 point2 points ago

Is there a novelty account of him? Reddit needs him randomly selling low quality products of people's comments.

[–]ContentEnt 3 points4 points ago

He has another commercial. For the shticky.

[–]thejesse 2 points3 points ago

i sounded like sheila broflovski the first time i heard "problem with that shedding pussy?" on television.

[–]andy__t 1 point2 points ago

My dad un-knowingly bought some shamwows from a salesman here in Oxford, UK. I still thank him to this day.

[–]schithead 0 points1 point ago

you'll love his nuts

[–]emerpus 35 points36 points ago

I wish my head had an elbow.

[–]gulpeg 30 points31 points ago

It's called a chin

[–]yayblah 6 points7 points ago

Yeah, he wishes he had a chin

[–]mattv1 11 points12 points ago

I have an extra one he can have.

[–]synicalx1 0 points1 point ago

Are you a Chinese phone book perchance?

lololololololololol

[–]deadskiesbro 6 points7 points ago

"Ooh baby let's get that car"

[–]brussels4breakfast 4 points5 points ago

Lol. That commercial is weird.

[–]dashdanw 7 points8 points ago

didn't you mean face swabbing?

[–]Wild_One_ 1 point2 points ago

It's a pun within a pun.

[–]derpina_is_a_mermaid 5 points6 points ago

Wasn't he also into Scientology....or an ex-Scientologist?

[–]lawlocost 6 points7 points ago

He's probably stuck in the closet with Mr. Cruise.

[–]creepyswaps 5 points6 points ago

I'd give it a 2/10 on the creep-o-meter.

[–]jooze 3 points4 points ago

And funny meter...

[–]Desando 12 points13 points ago

All I see when I see that guy is the face of the strippers be beat...but when I see the sham-wow I don't give a fuck about the strippers anymore :D

[–]Jeroknite 22 points23 points ago

I still only see the scout.

[–]chainsaw_juggler 15 points16 points ago

I'll throw in a second beating, absolutely free.

[–]digger_ex_pat 7 points8 points ago

He can't do this all day.

[–]brussels4breakfast 5 points6 points ago

I always hated it when he said that. I mean, the damned commercial came on every ten minutes.

[–]kabukistar 1 point2 points ago

You're gonna love my Bonk.

[–]mistersparrow 4 points5 points ago

Because it cleaned up that mess of a story!

[–]RebelWithoutAClue 4 points5 points ago

Hey it's Scrad from MIB II.

[–]reacher 3 points4 points ago

The headset should really be on the sham

[–]ItsBobsledTime -1 points0 points ago

Terrifying.

[–]skater296 -1 points0 points ago

I seen it!

[–]noizes 0 points1 point ago

You want to stop face swapping so you make a towel head joke?

[–]AbsoIuteZero 1 point2 points ago

Well, this would make foreplay more interesting to say the least.

[–]jsphpttrsn 0 points1 point ago

A Schlomisaur in his natural habitat.

[–]64oz_Slurprise 1 point2 points ago

That neck-arm.

[–]LactoseGalaxy 1 point2 points ago

Where is he now?

[–]AmazingSimply 1 point2 points ago

You're a towel.

[–]flinncheez 1 point2 points ago

Hasn't this been around for a while?

[–]brussels4breakfast 0 points1 point ago

A looooong time.

[–]carouselderby 1 point2 points ago

What do you mean? It's only been around for four years.

[–]wtfpwndd -1 points0 points ago

Introducing the head-wow.

[–]pranish 0 points1 point ago

You really need a slapchop for face swapping. The skin comes right off.

[–]makehisCH32COandBa 0 points1 point ago

There's an M. Night Shamwow joke in here somewhere...

[–]Sonofadot -1 points0 points ago

[–]brussels4breakfast 1 point2 points ago

Haven't seen this guy in awhile. Wonder what's he doing these days....

[–]pinktoothbrush 2 points3 points ago

He's selling the schticky now..

[–]brussels4breakfast 0 points1 point ago

Lol. That's too funny. I especially like all the dandruff the dude removed with the schticky. He needs to see a dermatologist.

I like the way Vince did the mug shot thing and you know he can't do this all day!! Hah. Thanks for the link.

[–]2dollarb 1 point2 points ago

Is your house a disaster?!

Get a head in your cleaning...

ShamWow!

[–]MisterCalampski 0 points1 point ago

[–]schwebz 0 points1 point ago

Billy Mays did it first.

[–]Majorskan 1 point2 points ago

[–]frankbooth84 0 points1 point ago

[–]z0rak 0 points1 point ago

[–]impossibru65 0 points1 point ago

He always looked like he really wanted to hurt someone. His face just says: "DON'T FUCK WITH ME."

[–]pamcdonough 1 point2 points ago

this whole face swapping fad is annoying, everyone should stop. and feel bad.

[–]jimbo91987 0 points1 point ago

You're gonna love my nuts

[–]Junkasis 1 point2 points ago

His head set is so useful.

[–]justalittlebleh 0 points1 point ago

This is my favorite face swap of all time, FUR SURE

[–]IncredibleFalk1 0 points1 point ago

He looks like Johnny Knoxville in Men in Black 2

[–]a_random_hobo 0 points1 point ago

This made me laugh endlessly.

[–]pestilentdefiler 0 points1 point ago

Still looks like Beavis.

[–]jimmykrumpets 0 points1 point ago

Hi it's Shamwow with Vince

[–]tatheir 0 points1 point ago

This was simultaneously hilarious and terrifying at an [8].

[–]ziyadlemore 0 points1 point ago

That was Terrifing.

[–]Born-dead 0 points1 point ago

Heavy as a fucking rock.

[–]Impalednarwhal1101 0 points1 point ago

For some reason, his face fills me with uncontrollable fury.

[–]Moosoula 0 points1 point ago

Just made this connection http://i.imgur.com/Iy1RJ.jpg

[–]barrettgpeck 0 points1 point ago

This 'shoop is older than hell but you still get an upvote.

[–]hay_ewe 0 points1 point ago

Well, this is weird.

[–]castleclouds -2 points-1 points ago

I'm waiting for the old reddit switcharoo.

[–]crashedpumpkin 0 points1 point ago

Heheh heh heh, beavis that was the coolest thing you´ve ever done, hehe..

Or am i the only one who things he looks like beavis?

[–]bam2_89 -1 points0 points ago

The world would truly be a better place without this scum.

[–]Gh0stw0lf 2 points3 points ago

Oh would we wake up and drink our coffee in the morning only to find it tastes better because this guy is dead?

Dont think so.

[–]bam2_89 1 point2 points ago

It wouldn't make coffee taste better, but it would do wonders for infomercials. It should've been him instead of Billy Mays.