this post was submitted on
1,001 points (72% like it)
1,599 up votes 598 down votes

gifs

unsubscribe320,731 readers

959 users here now

Kiva

Links to amusing, interesting, or funny .gifs from the web! .gif format submissions only, please!

How to make your own animated gifs?

Please try not to repost and post reaction gifs in /r/reactiongifs.

Direct image links preferred! Avoid pages that have other extraneous material besides the gif like headers, banners, ads, etc. And please, no blogspam. URL-shorteners are NOT allowed!

Witty titles optional. nsfw when necessary; this implies the comments within will be too.

NUDITY GOES IN /r/nsfw_gifs

MARK SEXY GIFS AND SERIOUS INJURIES NSFW
FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL NOW BE REMOVED

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 67 comments

[–]Arcaas 105 points106 points ago

So that's why my delivery pizzas are never cut all the way through.

[–]igetript 41 points42 points ago

Actually I usually never cut it all the way through because it stayed in the box better as a complete unit.

[–]mathees 30 points31 points ago

That actually makes a shit-load of sense

[–]enjoytheshow 6 points7 points ago

Ever get a pizza that was all flopped around and think "Who the fuck put this pizza in the box like this? God damnit." Well now you know it was probably the same guy who was trying to be nice by cutting your pizza all the way through.

[–]nwsreddit 3 points4 points ago

When I worked at a pizza place I always made sure to cut them even and all the way through. It bugs me too.

[–]Scuzzboots 68 points69 points ago

Ill bet that guy is higher than giraffe pussy.

[–]enjoytheshow 10 points11 points ago

I've never really thought about how high a giraffe's pussy really is. Hmm, interesting.

[–]trampus1 0 points1 point ago

Spice 1 reference?

[–]Scuzzboots 1 point2 points ago

I've only ever heard it in passing, but that very well may be where it came from :)

[–]ronintetsuro 0 points1 point ago

I first heard it from a stand up, but I can't think of which one right now.

[–]perfunction 1 point2 points ago

Joe Rogan

[–]ronintetsuro 0 points1 point ago

That's the one! Same one where he explains why we think we built the pyramids.

[–]Scuzzboots 1 point2 points ago

Now that I think about it, it was also a line in "Hip Hop Quotables" by Ludacris.

[–]Timett_son_of_Timett 0 points1 point ago

or as high as a roosters opinion of himself.

[–]babybantick 11 points12 points ago

So thats why my pizza slices are never the same fucking size.

[–]DoTheDew 4 points5 points ago

No, it has nothing to do with the speed at which they were cut. It's because we don't fucking care.

[–]onenifty 1 point2 points ago

Man, I used to be a driver for a pizza place way back in the day and I had to cut some up for a rush order. We didn't use those cutting wheel things but a rather large knife that was long enough to cut a very large pizza. Think a machete.

So, I slam this knife down on to the board like usual, but I missed slightly and ended up cutting the whole thing literally 1/3 of the way across. I had to use that line for the rest of the cuts, so by the end there was one tiny ass piece and one fucking huge one. The one large one was probably 40% of the whole pizza. Oops.

[–]DoTheDew 2 points3 points ago

They make this, but we only use it for school contracts that require all slices be equal. It's actually slower to use than a regular old pizza cutter.

[–]imjongilling 0 points1 point ago

Man, that's over $100 and quite unnecessary for home use, but for some reason I still want it.

[–]DoTheDew 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, we paid $235 for ours, but we often times do 300+ large pizzas for schools in one morning, so it kinda paid for itself in the first hour, that first day.

[–]onenifty 0 points1 point ago

Well now that's just ridiculous.

[–]PabbleDabble 22 points23 points ago

Hairnet.

[–]ferro94 4 points5 points ago

Good thing he's got that hat propped on top of the Sideshow Bob hair to make sure none of it gets in the pizza.

[–]walcott3560 4 points5 points ago

As a former Little Caesars employ, these kind of pizza-cutting skills aren't unheard of. This kind of pizza-cutting madness would usually occur when we are running low of pizzas in the hotboxes and someone comes through and orders more than we have prepared. It's remarkable how angry people could get when they had to wait 5 minutes for a pizza when something goes wrong and we weren't able to give them one right away.

[–]dublbagn 1 point2 points ago

my old boss and I both cut like this back in the day.... we would never do it on customers pizzas since it so easy to mess up and leave the pizza looking sloppy. The time saving is not great enough to justify the fuck ups....dude in the gif does 3 pizzas in 5 seconds? an average person can do it in 20 seconds, but pizzas dont come out at the rate of 1 per second, so that speed is wasted.

[–]animal900 -5 points-4 points ago

Those Little Caesars hot n' ready pizzas are nasty. Matter of fact, I can't think of a worse pizza. And I eat a LOT of pizza.

[–]spongemonster 6 points7 points ago

No dude, wait! I'm not done adding toppings ye—AARRGH MY HANDS!

[–]zacuke 3 points4 points ago

Hair net perhaps?

[–]arcademachin3 3 points4 points ago

Stoner level 1000

[–]Croupaloop 1 point2 points ago

Didn't think people wanted Little Ceasars pizza that bad, that fast..

[–]A_RedditUsername 2 points3 points ago

The guy in the background has teleporting skills like a mofo

[–]carpii 2 points3 points ago

Beware of The Wheelers

http://imgur.com/8Fx6X

[–]Misha_Vozduh 0 points1 point ago

The palindrome gif.

[–]nathanb065 0 points1 point ago

Fuckin...pizza cutter technology!

[–]Schmangeetay 0 points1 point ago

I heard Kenshiro

[–]MrHoneyBadger 0 points1 point ago

there goes a finger

[–]hychar 0 points1 point ago

And I bet you he's doing a better job than most pizza joints... I hate having to break apart my slices myself..

[–]vietcunt17 1 point2 points ago

ninja pizza cutter.

[–]variare -2 points-1 points ago

Suddenly hands are cut off

[–]Jackthastripper -1 points0 points ago

He must be one hell of an Escrimador

[–]you_sir_are_wrong -1 points0 points ago

Or just use the big wheel and it actually cuts all the way through at the same speed?

[–]Alexthegreatbelgian -1 points0 points ago

I guess art degrees do come in handy.

[–]V-mafia 0 points1 point ago

That is normal speed. I used to work there

[–]CheetosPuffer 0 points1 point ago

Skill.

[–]ninjames 0 points1 point ago

Uncle Blazer?!

[–]Valendr0s 0 points1 point ago

As a former very fast pizza cutter, I can say this is ridiculously fast. It never even occurred to me to dual-wield!

[–]deadguysleeps 0 points1 point ago

Anyone got the video?

[–]langfordm8 0 points1 point ago

I bet you still have to rip the prices apart

[–]xenothaulus 0 points1 point ago

The guys at the pizza place downtown are exactly like that, only I think they use a shovel.

[–]ImAFlyingWhale 0 points1 point ago

Did anyone notice the guy in the background is there and then he isn't? Why are there two different gifs?

[–]cjbasko23 0 points1 point ago

Knowing Reddit, I was kind of expecting the guy to cut his hand off...

[–]OleShae 0 points1 point ago

I may not be able to cut pizzas that fast but I make More money than him

[–]Sweaty_Fat_Fuck 0 points1 point ago

So that's why my slices are always stuck together.

[–]a_funsized_gentleman 0 points1 point ago

No one cares about how fast you can cut pizza. Everyone cares how fast you deliver it.

[–]Ivan_Of_Delta 0 points1 point ago

imagine all the hair that falls onto those pizzas

[–]I_R_Teh_Taco -1 points0 points ago

Edward pizza-cutterhands?

[–]BeefyTaco -3 points-2 points ago

not even close to a world record, those cuts are most likely all the way through, and the speed in which he does it is terrible for pizzas (specifically cheese) because it usually pulls into the cuts instead of actually cutting it. Also probably have a huge mess afterwards due to sauce and items flying around off the cutter. <--worked in pizza for 6 years, it is known

[–]flyingtiger188 -2 points-1 points ago

Why wouldn't you fold the boxes before putting the pizza in?

[–]ferro94 5 points6 points ago

It's much easier to fold the box around the pizza than to put a pizza in an already folded box. Yes the fact that I know this means I put in some time delivering pizzas.

[–]flyingtiger188 0 points1 point ago

Interesting, when I worked at Papa Johns we'd always fold the boxes before the pizza. I suppose it could be a different style of box, like those from dominos.

[–]ferro94 0 points1 point ago

That might be it. I worked at Dominos. The corners of the box fold in, to make a sort of hexagon shape to hold the pizza in place. If you folded the box first, you'd end up with pizzas not landing in the right spot too often.

[–]princeyassine -3 points-2 points ago

With great power comes great pepperoni

[–]BrasaMaan -2 points-1 points ago

hes great at pizza but a disaster at slicing bread

[–]rstaubach_12 -2 points-1 points ago

and not one slice was removed without recutting it.