That's some interesting news.

jamXalone · 2012-09-04T22:13:40+00:00

Lost my shit at "Man forced to eat beard". The flashlight one everyone makes fun of, but the thing is, that one made sense. Remember flashlight bombs, anyone?

missgonzo · 2012-09-05T04:15:38+00:00

I keep seeing the "not wearing any pants" and wondering to what degree she took the business of being without pants. Bare ass? Underwear? I'm curious and a quick googling didn't tell me.

Philoeteus · 2012-09-05T04:46:34+00:00

The kid who took a picture of the naked guy is my neighbour! The news channel paid him $100 for pictures and the interview. Here's the story from my city http://grossepointe.patch.com/articles/woods-police-subdue-man-wih-taser-on-mack-ave

vickewire · 2012-09-05T05:51:56+00:00

2 Köttbullesentusiast är nog mitt nästa ord när jag spelar hänga gubbe

lethargicwalrus · 2012-09-05T04:20:24+00:00

My reaction at Mr. Meatball enthusiast's name: http://imgur.com/xHgWe

Amorong · 2012-09-05T05:11:27+00:00

Yeah, early this summer here in Phoenix, AZ there were 5 or so flashlight bombs. If you see a flashlight laying on the ground, you're going to pick it up and turn it on, right? Kind of clever (and sick of course) of whoever made them..

Tweedle · 2012-09-05T05:40:06+00:00

The second slide was about a professional hockey player named Niklas Hjalmarsson and was probably played on the NHL network making the slide not so relevant.

Jewassassin · 2012-09-05T06:56:27+00:00

God damn it. two of these are from Portland...

Momheardyoufap · 2012-09-05T07:16:21+00:00

Dave Strider: Cool Kid

MMD86 · 2012-09-05T05:05:14+00:00

I always feel so bad whenever I see that picture of the "man forced to eat beard". He has such a sympathetic face. :(

millej · 2012-09-05T06:05:04+00:00

I was on the local news a few years back for a story related to my university. They asked everyone they interviewed for our name and year at school, so being in my fifth year, I jokingly told them I was a super senior. Apparently they liked the sound of it, so they put me on with the description "UB Super Senior". I'm still not sure whether I should be proud of it or feel like a jackass.

pakiet96 · 2012-09-05T10:38:38+00:00

i lost it when i read 'suspicious flashlight'

BT2113 · 2012-09-05T06:19:26+00:00

As a Blackhawks fan, Hjalmarsson is just about as good as a meatball on the ice, if not a little worse.

However, the back-story for the Meatball Enthusiast is that he is from Sweden and BlackhawksTV likes to have a little fun with the players on their videos every now and then. He did this IKEA commercial:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYoW0F01NbQ

and didn't live up to his goal so far.

xSupernaut · 2012-09-05T06:47:08+00:00

As a massive Blackhawks hater, I gained a lot of respect for Hjalmarrsson after learning he is a fellow meatball enthusiast.

Schnaars · 2012-09-05T07:33:19+00:00

LOL Sal Rizzo.

Eylisia · 2012-09-05T06:31:53+00:00

The suspicious flashlight got me.

reginadolce · 2012-09-05T00:25:02+00:00

That last guy is really cute.

certaindamagedlemons · 2012-09-04T21:33:59-07:00

Took "p1cture" of naked guy? Seriously?

blindcata · 2012-09-04T22:37:37-07:00

Sadly I remember watching the news about the "man forced to eat beard"

KittyKathy · 2012-09-05T05:53:09+00:00

During the tropical storm there were news that said "filled his tank" "bought groceries" and things like that.

Confucius_says · 2012-09-04T23:00:54-07:00

I'm most interested in "not wearing any pants", is there more on that in the studio?

iPoopFrenchOnionSoup · 2012-09-05T06:51:50+00:00

Local news broadcasts have so much to offer in the comedy department. This had me laughing really hard.

boonimajneB · 2012-09-05T07:20:03+00:00

News these days are bull.

QuickSkope · 2012-09-05T07:23:32+00:00

Anyone else think the beard guy looks like a hobo chum-lee?

mercury14 · 2012-09-05T07:41:01+00:00

Just for the record, ABC 7's Cool Kid segment is about kid's doing good things for the community, school, etc. They get nominated and get a scholarship I think.

NatTreav · 2012-09-05T08:02:12+00:00

hahaha the kick a ginger victim goes to my old highschool

cinnamonandgravy · 2012-09-05T08:08:31+00:00

world, we have an odd relationship

charlesbandara · 2012-09-05T08:13:17+00:00

"Man forced to eat beard" Wow that one really did it for me

sgtpandybear · 2012-09-05T08:13:30+00:00

I am in Kentucky and I remember when that guy had to eat his beard. I was dying of laughter when I saw that shit on the news! My boyfriend works in Lawrenceburg where this guy is from, it is a small town full of rednecks, but is not as small as the town I live in, Harrodsburg.

MonkeyMan13 · 2012-09-05T08:19:10+00:00

Hjalmarsson made sense. He's from Sweden so they ask him about Ikea products and meatballs.

YourFavoriteHippo · 2012-09-05T01:22:11-07:00

I was disappointed "Minor League Guy" wasn't there.

marshalton · 2012-09-05T08:24:56+00:00

Now imagine that everything's related to the same incident. Someone needs to come up with a story to tell us wtf happened.

Pepperyflower · 2012-09-05T08:25:35+00:00

I lol'd. No, I really laughed out loud.

FightingAmish · 2012-09-05T08:27:23+00:00

My favorite is that Man Forced to Eat Beard is labeled a "Big Story."

inherentlyinterested · 2012-09-05T01:40:37-07:00

The last guy looks like a skinny Rob Gronkowski

Libertarian-Centrist · 2012-09-05T01:56:07-07:00

How did those notes get up to the top? The chalk ones I mean to the left of the projection screen. SORCERY.

silverman780 · 2012-09-05T09:11:38+00:00

Totally went to HS with the guy who urinated in the reservoir

shutyourgob · 2012-09-05T09:12:58+00:00

Does the reservoir guy have sunglasses on the back of his head?

nu0r · 2012-09-05T02:27:09-07:00

The "cool kid" kid was the best.

bhindblueiz · 2012-09-05T09:40:22+00:00

The flashlight thing is no joke. Some fucks think its funny to leave bombs laying around for people to pick up. Most likely children, think about it, you see a flashlight, kills darkness, it's cool and hand held, and you don't have one, so you gotta pick it up and have it for your own. Sadistic fuck. Anyways, flashlight thing, is kinda old and not really funny, the other shit, hilarious.

implicate · 2012-09-05T09:43:38+00:00

I remember the "urinated in a reservoir" guy. This happened in Portland. I'm pretty sure the guy was drunk and thought it was a sewage treatment plant, not a city water reservoir. The city got the great idea to dump nearly 8 million gallons of water, which is totally ridiculous. I think he was on the hook for the $30,000 bill, too.

Found the link.

dinocillan_ · 2012-09-05T09:44:34+00:00

This reminds me of something Robyn would report on....

aidiot · 2012-09-05T10:05:45+00:00

Josh Seater does look like the type of guy to piss in a reservoir, especially with those sunglasses on the back of his head. I mean is he literally insane?!

Mobster96 · 2012-09-05T11:02:12+00:00

The "man forced to eat beard" was in the county that borders mine :D I remember watching it

basementboy · 2012-09-05T11:25:29+00:00

Meatballs, bitch!

Sparklebutt69 · 2012-09-05T11:32:19+00:00

Love these.

Kibethy · 2012-09-05T04:58:02-07:00

The meatball enthusiast is hot.

LeeTaeRyeo · 2012-09-05T12:00:48+00:00

I remember the story of the man who had to eat his own beard. I'm from around that area of Kentucky.

just_go_with_it · 2012-09-05T12:19:19+00:00

im enthusiastic about HIS meatballs...

DivinePotatoe · 2012-09-05T12:34:45+00:00

I would be more intrigued if all these people were involed in one connected news story.

DwedPiwateWobberts · 2012-09-05T12:43:50+00:00

Did anyone else notice that in the last picture, the guys name is a mix of both Sal Rosenburg and Frank Rizzo from The Jerky Boyz?

TapirTarts · 2012-09-05T12:57:48+00:00

The meatball enthusiast is Jesse from breaking bad.

Greymor · 2012-09-05T12:59:01+00:00

Thsis is the first time I have laughed out loud from reddit in some time.

Stay classy, Friends.

bootiful_ring · 2012-09-05T13:02:46+00:00

I wanna see the "Man forced to eat beard" story o.O

cjkeats · 2012-09-05T13:40:25+00:00

I appeared on my local news once and I was quite pleased with it.

tothebrothel · 2012-09-05T13:49:03+00:00

/r/nottheonion/

NeverBoredOnReddit · 2012-09-05T13:52:55+00:00

Someone needs to stop that flashlight before it blinds someone in broad daylight...

A7xjk · 2012-09-05T14:02:04+00:00

The Blackhawks have a lot to be proud of.

burntham77 · 2012-09-05T14:26:24+00:00

Of course the ginger got kicked. I mean just look at him.

yourmadbroski · 2012-09-05T14:34:48+00:00

It's a fleshlight! Wait a minute! That's mine!

Pupeteer · 2012-09-05T15:43:48+00:00

Not only is he a ginger, but he's also Jewish too. Life can't be easy for him.

leblat · 2012-09-05T16:32:19+00:00

Damn that flashlight looks suspicious...

Constantly_Wired · 2012-09-05T17:30:41+00:00

I HAVE THE SAME SHIRT AS THE "COOL KID!" YOU GUYS KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!

DarthNobody · 2012-09-05T18:21:43+00:00

For some reason, 'suspicious flashlight' sent me into a snicker-fest. I don't even care if it's not photoshopped and indicative of how paranoid and retarded society is, that's just hilarious.

red7up · 2012-09-05T03:17:57+00:00

I lost it at the flashlight

MonsieurGrimm · 2012-09-05T05:47:23+00:00

the meatball enthusiast looks like Demuslim.

just sayin'.

Mikeydabb · 2012-09-04T21:50:37+00:00

All u need was the first one that shit is hilarious

Peanutviking · 2012-09-05T04:48:01+00:00

That fucking flashlight made me lose all composure.

moononaut · 2012-09-05T06:25:43+00:00

This was posted yesterday. Enjoying the karma?

lordeddardstark · 2012-09-05T01:50:41-07:00

There's a Kick A Ginger Day?! How could I have missed that?

Wizzify · 2012-09-05T09:55:07+00:00

Lost it at 'suspicious flashlight'

KIllawinc · 2012-09-05T09:04:40+00:00

So believe it it don't but I know the person that pissed in the resivour. I'm on mobil so I can't do proof but tomorrow I can get on my laptop and post proof. Small world.

vanadamme · 2012-09-05T07:41:49+00:00

Holy crap I just laughed so hard that I almost broke my hand slamming it onto my table and my stomach hurts and I'm crying and I might vomit.

Mikeydabb · 2012-09-05T00:05:33+00:00

Yup lmao

funny

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