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WTF

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top 200 commentsshow all 464

[–]mr_niggle 775 points776 points ago

poor guy's got hoverhand even though they're already dating.

[–]SpartaWillBurn 505 points506 points ago

ur just sayin that idiot

[–]Stewart_Fishington 423 points424 points ago

Stop being tsundere.

[–]themanofawesomeness 123 points124 points ago

I love you always, Stewart_Fishington-kun.

[–]jordanminjie 82 points83 points ago

me too.

[–]Biggle 11 points12 points ago

What does 'kun' and 'chan' mean? Anyone know?

[–]Bobbias 28 points29 points ago

In japanese, there are what are known as honorifics, which are kinda like titles that go after someone's name. Kinda similar to Mr., Ms., etc. But japanese has more of them.

Chan and Kun are honorifics used often between close friends (of the same age) or by an older person talking to someone younger than them. Chan is the female honorific, and Kun is the male equivalent. There's also San, which is more respectful, and Sama, which is extremely respectful, along with a few others that aren't used too much (even Sama is pretty uncommon these days.)

San is pretty much the equivalent of Mr. in english, except that it applies equally to men and women.

[–]hedges747 22 points23 points ago

Daniel-San!!!!!

[–]Ezuri 9 points10 points ago

they are honorifics

[–]priorit 18 points19 points ago

In Japanese, you put them at the end of names for people younger than you, and in some cases to sound cute. "kun" is mostly for boys and "chan" is mostly for girls

[–]Chinook700 14 points15 points ago

NAME-SHWAAAN

[–]BeardyMcBeardster 5 points6 points ago

I get this!
And it's Nami.

[–]troutmix 15 points16 points ago

hmm....

4chan.

for little girls.

4 - four

chan - little girl

wat.

[–]misterfanwank 7 points8 points ago

Sit down before you hurt yourself, son.

"Chan" is short for channel in this case, similar to how "anime" is short for "animation." The name "4chan" comes from the similarly styled Japanese "Futaba Channel" website, which translates to "Two Leafs Channel," and is often shortened to just "Futaba" or "2chan."

This is why 4Chan's logo is four leafs.

An important thing to remember about Japanese is it has an extremely limited pool of phonemes compared to other languages, like English and Russian, so they often reuse phonemes and groups of phonemes. For this reason Japanese is a fairly punny language and the best way to ensure an accurate understanding of Japanese is to know Kanji.

[–]Sinthesys 2 points3 points ago

'chan' does not mean 'little girl'. It's a title. It's closer to 'miss'.

[–]kilo4fun 5 points6 points ago

And the chan in 4chan means channel.

[–]misterfanwank 2 points3 points ago

In this case it means "channel."

[–]APretentiousHipster 0 points1 point ago

Looked this up a while ago and my source said there was no gender basis. Apparently it is completely arbitrary. Got to wondering when the wiiaboo ex-gf kept calling me APretentiousHipster-chan.

[–]CoyoteStark 12 points13 points ago

i luv him 5-evar, which is mor than 4evur

[–]R3miel7 9 points10 points ago

b-baka!

[–]tytotabuki 35 points36 points ago

[–]beliefsarerelative 2 points3 points ago

hahaha that's great, where's it from?

[–]RAPT0RJESUS 0 points1 point ago

Naruto

[–]DoWhile 96 points97 points ago

lyk dis if you cri evertim

[–]manwithhat2 64 points65 points ago

Gets old, man.

[–]griesuschrist 31 points32 points ago

Yeah, even the comments on reddit are reposts.

[–]FuCKiNTowel 148 points149 points ago

Yeah, even the comments on reddit are reposts.

[–]pciespresso 11 points12 points ago

Gets old, man.

[–]luffyjr 5 points6 points ago

so meta

[–]IrritableOwlSyndrome 41 points42 points ago

True SAP

[–]noartwist 41 points42 points ago

Spanish American Princess? I don't think that applies here.

[–]Monkeys_with_Guns 18 points19 points ago

Serene Apartment Pose?

[–]Buy_Jupiter 12 points13 points ago

No, no, no. It stands for Super Army Penguins. Very relevant here.

[–]Monkeys_with_Guns 7 points8 points ago

Serpentine Argument Prose?

[–]DrAbednego 20 points21 points ago

You're all wrong it stands for Silly Anime Perv

[–]Buy_Jupiter 4 points5 points ago

[–]Biggle 2 points3 points ago

Pretty sure sap comes from trees.

[–]doctor_why 4 points5 points ago

Smelly Ass Pirate?

[–]supercrunch 11 points12 points ago

Sexually Ambiguous Prostitute

[–]systmh 20 points21 points ago

Hoverhand even while illustrated.

[–]ha_nope 125 points126 points ago

[–]Stealsfromhobos 82 points83 points ago

That's Thad McMichael, and he's currently being charged with child porn possession.

He's fucking hilarious though.

[–]waffle_ss 26 points27 points ago

Here's the relevant investigating agent testimony

[–]nameoriginunkown 15 points16 points ago

Wow, that's pretty fucking horrible.

[–]originalusername2 13 points14 points ago

Wow. It's almost as if he was trying to get caught.

[–]lols 5 points6 points ago

Oh lawdy.

[–]r1y23 3 points4 points ago

That was a good read.

[–]dirice87 14 points15 points ago

so...I actually was curious and googled his name, and somehow ended up watching a full grown man having sex with a pillow with JPOP playing in the background. Thanks r/WTF, you've delivered.

[–]reddittarded 26 points27 points ago

10 bucks his CP is actually hand-drawn loli hentai.

[–]glemnar 7 points8 points ago

The law doesn't give a fuck about loli Hentai. They're after child abuse and human trafficking.

[–]reddittarded 9 points10 points ago

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_status_of_cartoon_pornography_depicting_minors

Currently, countries that have made it illegal to possess (or create/distribute) sexual images of fictional characters who are described as or appear to be under eighteen years old include Canada, South Africa, Sweden, the United Kingdom, and the Philippines.

[–]IHaveAScatFetishAMA 5 points6 points ago

They most certainly do. It's treated as an equivalent to actual CP in many countries.

Get caught with it in your possession and you're fucked.

[–]ozymand1as 5 points6 points ago

Cue loli=?cp debate

[–]liberalis 2 points3 points ago

The complaint stated "real children".

[–]IHaveAScatFetishAMA 4 points5 points ago

Probably, though it's not like anyone that doesn't already find him creepy as hell cares. We just think it's funny.

[–]Kajillionaire 6 points7 points ago

SUGOI!

[–]LoverofLiterature 77 points78 points ago

Pretty sure that's a parody.
I seriously hope it's a parody.

Damn it tell me it's a parody.

[–]3klipse 29 points30 points ago

I got you man.

Its real 0_o

[–]HigherFive 82 points83 points ago

[–]spicardo28 90 points91 points ago

WHAT IN THE ALMIGHTY FUCK.

[–]blahblahblahdkjdfgj 5 points6 points ago

He still has his glasses on.

[–]RealBigMeech103 4 points5 points ago

What is it?

[–]Comafly 7 points8 points ago

It is an African-American man making love to a human sized pillow with an anime girl printed on to it. It is one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen.

[–]TheSlendid 33 points34 points ago

I've seen a lot of things but...

I think I'm done for tonight.

[–]RoblesZX 31 points32 points ago

Dude... Fuck the internet. I'm going outside.

[–]justbecausewhynot 26 points27 points ago

This just took the cake as the most fucked up thing on the internet. Ive seen shit man. Ived worked in an ER for a few years, and been around the darkest parts of the internet. But this... this... http://i.imgur.com/OLAdi.gif

[–]LoverofLiterature 36 points37 points ago

That's.. Can you give me a rope and a ceiling hook, please? I, uh, need it for my pirate costume.

[–]tyler2k 18 points19 points ago

oh fuck, why did I click that

[–]HonorAmongSteves 29 points30 points ago

NSFL.

[–]I_Dont_Have_One 13 points14 points ago

It's a guy having sex with a pillow, it's not that bad at all. If a girl were doing it we'd be all over it.

[–]unklemonkey 5 points6 points ago

I'm sorry, but if a girl were pretending the pillow was a sentient being, even going as far as to say "it was our first time" that'd still be fucking weird.

[–]justmerriwether 2 points3 points ago

[–]SirPrize 13 points14 points ago

Thank God mousing over that gave a few screenshots of it. Not watching that.

[–]reon3-_ 22 points23 points ago

oh my god there is no god.

[–]silentkill144 9 points10 points ago

WAT

[–]worlddictator85 8 points9 points ago

I...I think he broke her spine in a couple parts...

[–]attaxx 12 points13 points ago

IT IS NOT FUNNY ANYMORE

YOU RUINED IT

MY EYES...

[–]10007638 8 points9 points ago

I can do this. I've braved space dicks. edit: I braved this too, unfortunately.

[–]TheShaeDee 3 points4 points ago

As have I my friend. But this, I think it is the touch of sadness that does it in for me.

[–]jamzzz 6 points7 points ago

Ewww the guy kept his socks on.

[–]GLayne 9 points10 points ago

I'm 22 and what is this...?

[–]GrammarGorilla 5 points6 points ago

My brother has a pillow like that... Oh. God. Why?

[–]GoldLegends 7 points8 points ago

Wh.. why did I get a boner.. I'm so ashamed.. and aroused.

[–]attaxx 8 points9 points ago

everyone questions their own sexuality, but after seeing this video... I'm now sure that I won't be able to feel sexual arousal for any living or inanimate being in this universe.

[–]Chinook700 5 points6 points ago

NSFW....

[–]jxnpope12 1 point2 points ago

Not clicking on this might be the smartest thing I do tonight

[–]Brogoas 26 points27 points ago

It's real, IIRC that guy got busted for CP too

[–]dragon824 9 points10 points ago

[–]ThatIsMyHat 2 points3 points ago

Some things shouldn't even be done as parody.

[–]FamineLord 3 points4 points ago

it wasn't parody man :(

[–]downvoter_of_puns 8 points9 points ago

Is that the girl from School Days?

[–]MemeBot420 8 points9 points ago

nice boat.

[–]bitcheslovedroids 8 points9 points ago

[–]Bapetacular 1 point2 points ago

ha_nope STOP BEING Tsundere

[–]JohnRayburntheActor 239 points240 points ago

This new Andre the Giant sucks

[–]noirdrone 194 points195 points ago

Oh Krieger-San, when will we be wed?

[–]Mcfggy 27 points28 points ago

Oh you are just your mother all over again!

[–]AcesCharles2 6 points7 points ago

My cherry blossoms are wilting!

[–]iamthelucky1 4 points5 points ago

Hahaha, so subtle. I love Archer.

[–]perrycox69 3 points4 points ago

My cherry blossoms are wilting :(

[–]Yadowshadow 25 points26 points ago

The moment she gets smacked and you can genuinely see the face of pain on a hologram.

I can only imagine the inevitable weird sexual fantasies this is purported to fulfill...

[–]Sicar1us 10 points11 points ago

I can't wait!

[–]Kaskademtg 43 points44 points ago

dafuq did I just watch

[–]load_more_comets 19 points20 points ago

The future! I can't wait.

[–]racoonpeople 13 points14 points ago

Neckbeard trap.

[–]rakantae 15 points16 points ago

That's actually pretty cool.

[–]MrPizzlyBear 4 points5 points ago

Imagine this, but with Slender Man. The way people would look at someone wearing weird glasses, running away from nothing...

[–]awesomemanftw 6 points7 points ago

is this from archer? If it is, what episode? If not, what show and what episode?

[–]cohrt 16 points17 points ago

archer season 2 episode 6

[–]K4ge 3 points4 points ago

Yes, it's Archer. I love Krieger.

I don't remember the episode, though.

[–]R3miel7 9 points10 points ago

Krieger: living the dream

[–]aguyonline 2 points3 points ago

Krieger-san!

[–]lolzycakes 41 points42 points ago

"Me too." Oh man, I bet she was pissed after that...

[–]JoesShittyOs 17 points18 points ago

He won't even fully commit to his imaginary cartoon girlfriend

[–]I-Redeemer 49 points50 points ago

He looks like a fat Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords

[–]Tpoe 44 points45 points ago

Is this real? It can't be real... I'm just going to believe this isn't real.

[–]IceDag 47 points48 points ago

You dare doubt the internet?

[–]I_smell_awesome 22 points23 points ago

I have a hard time believing that someone would just go on the internet and tell lies.

[–]Gotenks0906 17 points18 points ago

You trying to call Obama a liar?

[–]hemotrophic_wee 6 points7 points ago

LIAR

[–]Gotenks0906 2 points3 points ago

Whoops, edited, thanks.

[–]hemotrophic_wee 4 points5 points ago

;) got your back dear

[–]BALTIM0R0N 5 points6 points ago

Even if this particular instance isn't real, it's almost a certainty that this or something very close to this has happened this year.

Whenever I see this kind of thing I'm reminded of how Ted Kaczynski once inquired at his school's health clinic about getting a sex change. He figured it would be the only way he could ever touch a woman.

I wonder if the gentleman in OP's picture feels the same way.

[–]axemaster72 3 points4 points ago

Why would someone do that? Lie on the internet?

[–]SpartaWillBurn 3 points4 points ago

Sad day for humanity.

[–]Dannybaker 11 points12 points ago

Aren't you original and witty

[–]TheBadgerWoreBlack 57 points58 points ago

These always make me so sad because I know I'm one bad date away from being this guy.

[–]misterfanwank 24 points25 points ago

Your post makes me so sad because seeing people give up on life is so sad.

Also, people die when they are killed.

[–]A_Cylon_Raider 3 points4 points ago

Huh?

[–]misterfanwank 12 points13 points ago

...

Y'know what? I don't know how to explain it.

[–]A_Cylon_Raider 2 points3 points ago

M'kay.

[–]downvoter_of_puns 7 points8 points ago

There is a picture of an anime character, and the subtitle says "People die if they are killed"

[–]A_Cylon_Raider 2 points3 points ago

Ah, cool cool. Got it now.

[–]Phased 69 points70 points ago

This makes me very sad that somebody is that lonely. I hope he finds himself a real lady soon before he becomes one of those people that marries imaginary things. Video talking about a guy that married a video game character from Love Plus a japanese DS dating game.

[–]hthemus 32 points33 points ago

What if he actually likes life this way?

[–]MrBoog 87 points88 points ago

I'm all for not judging people's lifestyle choices, but fabricating an imaginary anime girlfriend and having conversations with her just can't be healthy.

[–]zenzippo 19 points20 points ago

yes exactly

[–]ablebodiedmango 34 points35 points ago

Hey if it prevents him from breeding I'm all for it

[–]misterfanwank 12 points13 points ago

Then more power to him.

[–]Womens_rights_LOL 14 points15 points ago

He's a few whiskers from becoming a neck beard. Then the transformation will be complete...

[–]Warbieful 9 points10 points ago

I know the term virgin neck beard gets banded around some what, but I feel that this mother fucker needs some poon, and quickly.

[–]Adarkox 29 points30 points ago

He already got some toon.

[–]jay_gun 15 points16 points ago

[–]Sofa_King_Bored 23 points24 points ago

I can tell they're just friends, hoverhand.

[–]jamesonbar 12 points13 points ago

[–]moctedamus 29 points30 points ago

Would anyone like a peanut?

[–]Noozooblor 14 points15 points ago

Kinda looks like a fat Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords http://i53.tinypic.com/1589fko.jpg

[–]ReagansAngryTesticle 8 points9 points ago

There has to be a subreddit filled with stuff like this

[–]thelakesouth 10 points11 points ago

[–]Wadderson 6 points7 points ago

TIL what tsundere means: a Japanese character development process that describes a person who is initially cold and even hostile towards another person before gradually showing his or her warm side over time.

I just figured he spelled some shit wrong.

[–]AskMeAboutMyScrotum 11 points12 points ago

I'm not proud to admit that I used to resemble this kid.

http://imgur.com/A2C3J

[–]morlakai 9 points10 points ago

sick fro :D

[–]cheblehbleh 0 points1 point ago

Sexist looking Afro I've seen.

[–]rageblock 27 points28 points ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
Forever Alone Level:0 8coms 26pts 1mo funny
Krieger-san Jr. (x-posted from r/wtf, SFW) 43coms 318pts 2mos ArcherFX
There is way more like this. 292coms 893pts 2mos WTF

source: karmadecay

[–]overused-meme-alert 1 point2 points ago

Forever Alone

beep.

[–]OmegaFlex 7 points8 points ago

Because SOMEONE had to post it.

As you can see from the comments, 4chan hit this guy pretty hard.

[–]enigmatican 19 points20 points ago

oh god, that spelling and grammar...

[–]dekonstruktr 63 points64 points ago

stop being tsundere enigmatican

[–]enigmatican 20 points21 points ago

it's not like I'm jealous or anything...

[–]excitom 4 points5 points ago

As a parent, my heart aches ...

[–]mitchg01 13 points14 points ago

NO FREAKING WAY I KNOW THIS KID

[–]TheSigma3 12 points13 points ago

You can't leave it at that! More info

[–]downvoter_of_puns 11 points12 points ago

> 2012

> Waifus being /r/wtf material

I should post my unicycle on here. You guys will shit a brick.

[–]WTFock 3 points4 points ago

Jesus christ. Why do I always expect people who do creepy shit like this to look EXACTLY like that dude?

[–]Grimreaper023 3 points4 points ago

This is fucking depressing.

[–]WireRabbit 5 points6 points ago

If you hover hand a 2D chick, u are beta as fuck.

[–]Flowerpig 2 points3 points ago

I feel kinda sorry for Andy-kun...

[–]chubowu 0 points1 point ago

that's really sad

[–]DzWR 2 points3 points ago

Andre the Giant has come back into this world :o

[–]rekgreen 2 points3 points ago

I dunno man, looks shopped to me, look at the pixels around her hair. I don't think she really is his girlfriend.

[–]Hawkmoon333 2 points3 points ago

After reading this I wanted to run out of my house screaming and attack the first living thing I saw.

[–]Devanismyname 1 point2 points ago

Whoever makes fun of this is an asshole. It is totally awesome that he has found true love. Dicks!

[–]13Purple 2 points3 points ago

I actually found this legitimately sad.

[–]Corbo1985 2 points3 points ago

Hover hands fake anime gf. What a badass.

[–]snip3rm00n 4 points5 points ago

So ronery...

[–]Geopixelism 2 points3 points ago

Elvis, Is that you?

[–]Inidi6 1 point2 points ago

That is one lonely neckbeard.

[–]robotlord1 2 points3 points ago

This is actually really sad.

[–]Papa_Dragon 2 points3 points ago

Omg hai _^ I’m Ai-san and I absolutely luuuv @@ anime <3 and my fav is naurto!!! Okies so anyways, im going to tell you about the BEST day of my life when I met my hot husband sasuke!! <333333333 OMFGZ HE WAS SOOOOO FREAKIN KAWAII IN PERSON!!! Supa kawaii desu!!!!!!!! ^__^ When I walked onto Tokyo street =^=I looked up and saw…SASUKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333!!!! “ KONNICHIWA OMGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ SUPA SUPA SUPA KAWAII SASUKE-SAMA!!!!!” I yelled nn then he turned chibi then un-chibi!! he looked at me [O.O;;;;;;;;;;;] and then he saw how hot I am _ he grabbed my hand and winked ~^ then pulled me behind a pocky shop oo and started to kiss me!!!!!! [OMG!!! HIS TOUNGE TASTED LIKE RAMEN!!! RLY!! >.> <.< >.< (O) (O) (O)] then I saw some baka fat bitch watching us and I could tell she was undressing him with her eyes!!!!!!! [ --;;;;; OMG I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT EITHER!!! (oo) (o_o) (o_o)] so I yelled “UH UH BAKA NEKO THAT’S MY MAN WHY DON’T YOU GO HOOK UP WITH NARUTO CAUSE SASUKE-SAMA LOVES ME!!! (o_o)” then sasuke held me close == and said he would only ever love me and kissed me again!!!!!!! (O)/ then we went to his apartment and banged all night long and made 42 babies and they all became ninjas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nyaaaaa!!! (<) ^;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

[–]allisayisshitson 0 points1 point ago

Shit, son...

[–]kb13733 1 point2 points ago

I know a guy EXACTLY like that. Looks and forever alone and everything.

[–]TmillzDollaBillz 0 points1 point ago

There's someone out there for everyone

[–]CandyPie725 1 point2 points ago

i bet they have amazing sex

[–]emerg 1 point2 points ago

I like how there's so much distance between them. He must have paid her to take this pic with her.

[–]puggybuny820 1 point2 points ago

Real life Krieger?

[–]StickyBunz1 0 points1 point ago

It's his waifu.

[–]SamuraiStormtrooper 0 points1 point ago

Not all people with waifus are this bad.

[–]thomn8r 1 point2 points ago

Ah, Krieger-san

[–]lowlifecreep 0 points1 point ago

jelly

[–]Salekdarling 1 point2 points ago

It's a little scary how much this guy looks like my husband when we first met... Looks like I got questions to ask him.

[–]sidneyc 7 points8 points ago

Are you an anime character?

[–]jamesdaily 0 points1 point ago

Those sideburns though...

[–]leaf1389 -1 points0 points ago

hoverhands