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[–]canteen_boy 178 points179 points ago

I had no idea Bruce Lee, Tony Jaa, Jackie Chan, Jet Li, and Chuck Norris were fictional characters.

[–]dooblagras 39 points40 points ago

They would be if you said that they walked into a bar...

[–]Gallifrasian 23 points24 points ago

Bar no hit back.

[–]sharkiness 3 points4 points ago

My hangover would beg to differ...

[–]bananapanther 18 points19 points ago

Maybe someone can tell me how anyone on that picture could beat Neo.. and he's on the bigger team.

[–]ThePowerOfBeard 52 points53 points ago

Actually, Chuck should probably be moved to the other side... and Bruce would still win.

[–]jimmyhoffasbrother 9 points10 points ago

Well if you look at Chuck Norris as a fictional character, as in the Chuck Norris that has been created through the Chuck Norris facts, he would have a fair shot.

[–]VeRiTaS_CuRaT 9 points10 points ago

Only if they were fighting in the Matrix, could Neo win.

[–]Lulzorr 12 points13 points ago

But the matrix itself is a part of reality, or would have to be for neo to exist...

therefor he would not only know all the stuff he learned while out of the matrix but would also retain his dodging capabilities.

... I'd think.

[–]pork_a_pine_princess 15 points16 points ago

ok, well either the reality that Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee exist(ed) in is the matrix world, or, Neo would have to travel back in time. Either way it wouldn't work out

also, i might give up everything I own to see the Goku vs Superman fight

[–]EverythingIsMediocre 17 points18 points ago

WELL. Because that's regular Superman and not Superman prime, my money is on Goku since they included his ability to go SS4 Gogeta. I mean, think about this. In the Cell Saga goku has to warn someone not to use a full power Kamehameha because they'll blow the planet up. Throughout the ENTIRE series Goku had been limiting his strength in order to squishing the planet like a grape. Since before the Cell saga! He could only go super saiyan one then. But he's shown the ability to blow up planets even in regular form. Super Saiyan multiplies his strength by 50. SS2 doubles that! SS3 doesn't have a released factor, but lets put it at doubling and the same for SS4 as well. So Goku could blow a planet up with ease and still be able to become 400 times stronger WITHOUT fusing. He can become 400 times stronger than he was when he had to limit his ability to avoid exploding a planet. My money is on Kakarot every day.

[–]IonicSquid 9 points10 points ago

Because that's regular Superman and not Superman prime...

The fuck are you guys doing over in comic book land? What happened to Superman just being goddamn Superman?

[–]EverythingIsMediocre 11 points12 points ago

Superman Prime is this omniscient and omnipotent being with power over everything and whenever anyone brings up a superman fight it's always an issue so I felt the need to preemptively address it.

[–]goetz_von_cyborg 5 points6 points ago

I've always though Goku was hilariously overpowered. He would win every fantasy fight ever.

[–]EverythingIsMediocre 8 points9 points ago

The only character that I can think of that would beat Goku super easily is Dr. Manhattan.

[–]Shippoyasha 3 points4 points ago

Maybe, until Goku's Earth God, Space God and Universe God friends tricks him up with all kinds of cosmic powers.

[–]EverythingIsMediocre 10 points11 points ago

Idk man. Manhattan manipulates matter on an atomic level. It don't matter what Goku throws at him he can literally do anything to it.

Plus Manhattan can't die...

[–]Revvy 11 points12 points ago

Will Goku finally win? Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z!

[–]LacksRethics 13 points14 points ago

Goku vs Superman would be like...4 seasons long.

[–]VPCoolT 2 points3 points ago

Next time on Dragon Ball Z!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[–]Boring_Machine 3 points4 points ago

you don't properly understand the legend that is Bruce Lee

[–]Mogura 2 points3 points ago

Speaking of which, where is Donnie Yen?

[–]Bmart008 80 points81 points ago

Yoda : Country USA heh.

[–]Jaller 51 points52 points ago

And thor. The recent movie took place in America, but I'm pretty sure he's from Asgard

[–]jimmux 10 points11 points ago

I believe Alice isn't from "Wonderworld", as well.

[–]PuroMichoacan 12 points13 points ago

Wait a minute...

[–]lonesome_god 43 points44 points ago

A minute, wait ...

FTFY

[–]Tonytarium 32 points33 points ago

Gandalf Vs Dumbledore. I cant believe it wasnt one of them.

[–]Draziil 10 points11 points ago

[–]7253uy 64 points65 points ago

How about Ratchet and Clank vs. Jak and Daxter?

That would be pretty interesting...

Edit: spelling mistake

[–]Cyrisaurus 19 points20 points ago

Dexter

ಠ_ಠ I know it's a common mistake, but it drives me insane each time someone does it

[–]Loves2Sp00ge 7 points8 points ago

I'd say Ratchet vs Jak, Jak would win because he's a damn good shot and he can go into dark or light form, but Clank vs Daxter would be Clank all the way because he is an awesome robot with a built in helicopter!

[–]mrsambo99 11 points12 points ago

If Ratchet had RYNO, he'd rip Jak apart. It would be a sick fight!

[–]roxasomega 3 points4 points ago

If Ratchet had RYNO, he'd rip Jak a new one. It would be a sick fight!

FTFY. For those that don't get the joke, RYNO stands for Rip Ya a New One.

[–]MrFluffykins 3 points4 points ago

But Jak with the final form of the Piece Maker would destroy Ratchet!

[–]Krutonman 45 points46 points ago

Who decided that Hawkeye is 5'1"? The character is listed as 6'3" and the actor he is drawn as is 5'9"

[–]Drosslemeyer 19 points20 points ago

A lot of the heights are all over the damn place.

[–]thederpmeister 13 points14 points ago

Also legolas is an elf. Aren't they tall?

[–]housnap 5 points6 points ago

I think the artist has no concept of height. I'm 93 lbs and 5'1"....

[–]zennilicious 4 points5 points ago

First I was upset at Superman at 5'9". Then I saw Hawkeye.

This was drawn by a very tiny man.

[–]neagrosk 18 points19 points ago

Now Popeye vs Asterix is something I'd actually want to watch

[–]kinx 10 points11 points ago

Guys? Asterisk == * His name is Asterix.

[–]OhTheGrandeur 6 points7 points ago

I thought that was a particularly smart match up

[–]CheddarMonk 123 points124 points ago

My money is all on El Chapuiln Colorado!

[–]Wille304 33 points34 points ago

"No contaban con mi astusia!"

[–]Sisaac 30 points31 points ago

astucia*

Spanish Spelling Nazi.

[–]Wille304 8 points9 points ago

Perdon Profesor Jirafales!

[–]chinoz219 11 points12 points ago

Jirafales*

[–]Spotted_Owl 12 points13 points ago

"Siguen me los buenos!"

[–]eKtoR 5 points6 points ago

  • siganme

[–]who-said-that 41 points42 points ago

I agree 100%!! My money would go to Don Ramón too (Seu Madruga in portuguese).

[–]Arachnid92 8 points9 points ago

Y no te doy otro porque mi abuelita fue campeona de peso pesado!

[–]Wille304 26 points27 points ago

I'd rather put my money on Dona Florinda!

All it takes is one slap, and its over!

[–]Sisaac 20 points21 points ago

Not to mention she can do a "Chusmality"... that's one beast of a special attack!

[–]Arachnid92 11 points12 points ago

She would actually have to be in a tag team with Kiko for it to work tho.

[–]who-said-that 11 points12 points ago

Lol, true that; one slap K.O.

[–]neorevenge 6 points7 points ago

I was confused why Don Ramón Had that name, Thanks!

[–]PuroMichoacan 4 points5 points ago

No contaban con mi astucia.

[–]zushen 12 points13 points ago

Why the fuck wasn't ip man on the one with norris and li??!

[–]hcsLabs 14 points15 points ago

He wasn't allowed to compete. Something about not paying his membership dues.

[–]Iceman1832 31 points32 points ago

Seu Madruga? His name is Don Ramon!!!

[–]who-said-that 12 points13 points ago

My guess is this was made by a Brazilian fan.

[–]HashBR 3 points4 points ago

BraZilian. corrected

[–]raygadas 45 points46 points ago

In case anyone cares, I found the source. He's done quite a few others including:

Doc Brown & Beakman VS Jimmy Neutron & Dexter

Fox McCloud VS Luke Skywalker

Isaac Clarke VS Gordon Freeman

[–]TooMuchTony 24 points25 points ago

Luke weighs 206 lbs? There's no way Mark Hamill weighed anything over 150 lbs in Star Wars.

50lb+ flight suit? Idk.

Edit: Also, he's supposedly 5'9 (I don't believe it) so I'd say 160lbs max for Luke.

[–]Jared6197 35 points36 points ago

That's not what I imagine Gordon would say at all.

[–]allineedis42 40 points41 points ago

I thought he would something like "..." or "....". Even "ಠ_ಠ" would be more appropriate.

[–]dirtygerman55 15 points16 points ago

Yeah. That seems kind of stupid.

[–]ss4mario 5 points6 points ago

The Gordon Freeman match up is just...off.

[–]Doctor_Loggins 6 points7 points ago

main weapon

not his ridiculous, quantum-edged, dark matter, psy-baby-murdering crowbar

Freeman's been deliberately gimped.

[–]PirateOwl 2 points3 points ago

Well otherwise it just wouldn't be fair.

[–]kriboshoe 16 points17 points ago

WonderLAND

[–]ReverendDexter 26 points27 points ago

I would pay to watch all of those.

[–]naxter48 12 points13 points ago

It's bothering me that Krypton is spelled "Kripton" in the album.

[–]shaker28 4 points5 points ago

It's bothering me that strength is spelled "strenght".

[–]TooMuchTony 3 points4 points ago

Spelling errors on most of them but this one bothers me the most as well. Great pictures regardless.

[–]Gosugoose 74 points75 points ago

Theres no way Legolas weighs 82kg. In the movie you can clearly see he can walk ontop of the loose snow, while the rest has to do it the hard way.

Come to think of it, everyones height is way off. Da fuq!

[–]dragonslayah 39 points40 points ago

[–]Baltimore_Happenings 9 points10 points ago

i thought no one else knew of this game

[–]dragonslayah 4 points5 points ago

Commander G.A.B. reporting in. Played a lot from 2002 til 2006 ish. Moria swarm + man/elf archery <3

[–]AgamemnonV1 15 points16 points ago

Tolkien geek reporting.

All Elves in Middle-earth mythos are tall. I mean tall. Even after the Sundering of Elves, most were still clear over seven feet. Also, all Elves retain a lithe figure and have remarkable eyesight, impressive hearing, and are light-footed (which is why Legolas was able to walk on top of all of that snow at the Caradhras scene when the rest of the Fellowship was waist-deep in it). They're also immune to disease and sickness.

[–]IStandUpForYou 35 points36 points ago

Thor isn't from USA.

[–]walrusbot 30 points31 points ago

That Thor canon is.

[–]IStandUpForYou 6 points7 points ago

Ah, gotcha.

[–]NothingButLoveForAll 19 points20 points ago

This is a wonderful contribution, I really enjoyed this! Thank you very much!

I'm really pulling for Calvin & Hobbes.

[–]Reedfrost 4 points5 points ago

There's really no contest there.

[–]Anus_master 11 points12 points ago

Legolas is only 5 feet?

[–]dragonslayah 9 points10 points ago

Legolas should have been taller. LotR elves are typically the same height as average humans. D&D elves for example are much shorter.

[–]knobbodi 12 points13 points ago

Actually I think LotR elves are taller than humans. In the first (?) movie when they're on that mountain, Legolas looks super tall and stretched out

[–]dragonslayah 7 points8 points ago

Lotr.wikia writes that average Elf-height is between 5'5" and 6'

[–]Juliendnb 52 points53 points ago

Goku died a couple times. I think he could handle a guy with a cape.

[–]vitticho 2 points3 points ago

Superman is also weak to magic, which Goku can be argued to use.

[–]StaticSabre 5 points6 points ago

Even if you don't consider Goku's chi as a "Magic" ability, I'm pretty sure that Goku's raw power would easily overpower even the strongest iteration of Superman. Even if somebody wanted to say that they were on equal ground, Goku still would have the advantage of instantaneous travel, which would allow him to grab Superman and take him to a universe without a yellow sun.

[–]TheRMF 9 points10 points ago

I was not expecting to see Seu Madruga or Chapulin Colorado but I'm happy they were there, oh the nostalgia.

[–]VicYesterday 24 points25 points ago

El Chapulin Colorado?! Heck yes.

[–]neorevenge 10 points11 points ago

While I'm pretty sure it's not intended they didn't include Cunning on his abilities, if they did intended it, that's an awesome joke

[–]FeelingCute 64 points65 points ago

I pretty sure the /b/ scientifically proved that Goku would beat Superman with ease. It was something along the lines of Superman's strength would equate to a power level less than 100, resulting in a kind of Bruce Lee vs a comatose infant spectacle.

[–]Denivire 35 points36 points ago

This is partially because Superman's powers come from being in the light of a yellow sun. Put him on a planet with a different colored sun (like red, the color of the star for Krypton), and suddenly he's just an average dude, yet Goku still retains all of his strength no matter where he goes.

[–]Arachnid92 22 points23 points ago

That's where instantaneous transmission would come in handy you know...

[–]MeloDet 8 points9 points ago

No, he only has no power under a red star. Orange is half strength. Blue is double as well as gaining new abilities.

[–]Denivire 4 points5 points ago

Either you're mistaken, or the DC Wiki, Wikipedia, and my comic book fanatic friend are all lying to me.
Ignore this, I somehow failed to comprehend what was being said. I was stupid. Carry on.

[–]Reedfrost 19 points20 points ago

I like how he just apologizes and goes home.

[–]VPCoolT 3 points4 points ago

Aw.. fuck... my badd... you okay?

I'm just... I'm just going to go... but damn you should go to a hospital or something... damn.

[–]Brutalitarian 9 points10 points ago

Even Darkseid beats out Superman every time. Nobody would stand a chance against Goku unless someone from New Genesis came in to alter the universe with their Mother Box somehow.

[–]Crossfox17 6 points7 points ago

Even then Goku would be invincible. He can destroy entire planetary systems without breaking a sweat.

[–]HMacyFan4eva 4 points5 points ago

Yeah but the stats they used for that seemed like serious bullshit

[–]massacre0520 8 points9 points ago

Considering Goku easily blows up planets...

[–]tsuk 12 points13 points ago

Superman can fly so fast that he can reverse time. Now Imagine a invulnerable object hitting anything. Like a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence it would be utter destruction.

[–]Tonytarium 107 points108 points ago

You had the chance to say "udder destruction" after using a cow analogy and you didnt do it?

[–]PuroMichoacan 8 points9 points ago

He fuck up the pun thread.

[–]neagrosk 26 points27 points ago

I never got how people got the idea that flying extremely fast made you go back in time, not to mention Goku has intergalactic instant travel.

[–]ukraine093 29 points30 points ago

Goku would still win.

[–]Moklok 13 points14 points ago

Superman lost to Doomsday, didnt he? No way he could beat Goku.

[–]notabook 9 points10 points ago

Superman didn't lose to Doomsday (if anything was a tie since neither truly "died").

Honestly it depends on which Superman though. One version of Superman was literally larger than the entire DC multi-verse (Cosmic Armor Superman) so obviously that version would easily beat Goku.

The more classical Superman? Goku wins easily even without having to go SS.

[–]Paradoxius 17 points18 points ago

This is the problem with a character that has to be the most powerful hero in an ever expanding universe. He went from lifting cars and jumping over buildings to essentially being a god over time.

[–]RaichuALoveS0ng 0 points1 point ago

And Goku can teleport? And why would Goku let him do that?

[–]LSUTTONIII 6 points7 points ago

I got sonic in the 8,607,706950,970,000 yard dash

[–]VeRiTaS_CuRaT 2 points3 points ago

You accidentally a comma.

[–]Drewlicious 26 points27 points ago

TIL I am taller then Superman. . .

[–]awwp_voter 35 points36 points ago

AND MORE IMPORTANTLY GOKU

[–]HashBR 14 points15 points ago

And Vegeta! (5'5")

[–]Ikimasen 12 points13 points ago

Is that with or without his hair?

[–]HashBR 4 points5 points ago

Without of course. I am 5'5", now I just need to be a saiyan!

[–]LuckyCanuck13 11 points12 points ago

[–]jdoohi720 17 points18 points ago

21th?

[–]Game25900 4 points5 points ago

Yeah i can't wait until the twenty-oneth of December, Goku Vs. Superman is going to be epic.

[–]RaichuALoveS0ng 0 points1 point ago

For some reason my mind went right to "Twenty Firth"

[–]murrdy2 4 points5 points ago

And here I thought Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee were non fiction

[–]willneu97 5 points6 points ago

Yoda's first appearance wasn't in 1977. It was in 1980.

[–]Supervisor194 4 points5 points ago

All these comments on all those pictures yet this was the only comment I was certain existed before I even looked.

[–]Clockwork757 5 points6 points ago

I lost it at Dorthy vs. Alice

[–]persunx 3 points4 points ago

what no teletubbies vs sesame street?

[–]ROKMONSTER714 5 points6 points ago

it should be hawkeye vs. green arrow

[–]QuicklyMade 4 points5 points ago

Alice would go all Hysteria Mode and shred Dorothy.

[–]ceedubs2 5 points6 points ago

Why is Hawkeye barely taller than a 6th grader?

[–]piradical 7 points8 points ago

oh man.. i loled so hard at seu madruga.here in brasil he is kinda of worshipped.the original name would be don jamon if i not mistaken..but i think seu madruga fits him much better!

[–]who-said-that 11 points12 points ago

nope, the original name is Don Ramon, but you weren't that far off. Lol, Don Jamón actually would actually mean mr ham.

[–]PuroMichoacan 2 points3 points ago

Don Jamon.

[–]Chiefzakk 10 points11 points ago

Goku beats all

[–]Sajam 6 points7 points ago

I'm only going to speak on the stuff I know here:

Hulk smash.

[–]aveilleux 4 points5 points ago

What the fuck is with the links to duelos.net today?

[–]VirtualSteak 3 points4 points ago

Hawkeye shoots recurve.

[–]pgan91 14 points15 points ago

Hulk, because his strength exceeds that of even gods

Megaman, because he probably has all the upgrades from his defeated enemies, and thus, has more versatility compared to Astro Boy.

Goku, because he knows martial arts in addition to super strength, flying, and invulnerability. I've no doubt that they're at the very least, on par, when it comes to strength. Also, Goku has no crippling weaknesses... besides food.

Legolas, because he's had hundreds of years (if not thousands) of years perfecting the art of the bow.

MIB, because they're trained to deal with Aliens, and would probably be prepared for Alien anyway.

Martial Arts: Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Kesuke Miyagi, and Tony Jaa, simply because they have a lot more variety in their martial art styles.

Alice: Because she's crowned as a queen in Through the Looking Glass.

I'd have to give it to Lobo and Ghost Rider, because of Lobo's intellect. Theres no doubt he'd find some way to defeat both Hellboy and Spawn.

Bugs Bunny: Because he has been shown to be a lot more versatile when it comes to confrontations.

Libra Dohko: Because he has the power of the fucking universe itself. OP.

Calvin and Hobbes: Army of Snowmen OP.

Popeye: Because he's got 20lbs on the other guy.

Roadrunner: Because at the end of the day, no matter how many traps/schemes/brilliant ideas that Wile E Cyote has, they seem to never ever ever work out. That amoutn of luck is ridiculous.

Rocky: Because one punch and Madruga would be out.

Thor: because... really?

[–]eKtoR 6 points7 points ago

Hulk is not stronger than Gods. And kratos has beaten all the olympians and some titans. This is actually the best match up. I can't really tell who would win.

But, Goku v. Superman? Pffff

Goku wins hands down.

[–]DracoObscura 4 points5 points ago

Hulk has in fact beaten gods. Specifically and most well known (thanks to the recent Avengers movie) Asgardians. Who are gods. And he did it in a split second, without trying, with his bare hands. Kratos has to find special tools and is god himself. Hulk wins. He might take a few hits first, but that'll just piss him off more, which makes him stronger, and means he'll be even more likely to win.

[–]eKtoR 4 points5 points ago

Yeah. But the movie doesn't really count, I'm talking actual marvel universe. It's so strange, sometimes it appears that Hulk is rather weak. Having been beaten by Daken, and his dark son. (I hate every time they make Hulk look weaker than someone, in my mind he is the strongest there is). Not to Mention, the Fear itself saga. I do agree, Kratos needs tools. But imagine them both fighting at their peak?

Hulk, the strongest there is v. Kratos, the God of war. I still don't know. Man, Kratos killed Zeus and destroyed the universe as we know it.

[–]UltraSpankA 4 points5 points ago

Glad to see some one knows Yoda doesn't stand a fucking chance :)

[–]Zethimitha 3 points4 points ago

upvote for army of snowmen reference

[–]Shippoyasha 2 points3 points ago

*Megaman, because he probably has all the upgrades from his defeated enemies, and thus, has more versatility compared to Astro Boy. *

Astro Boy can fly into space, redirect meteors and he has fought a robot army just the same. Meanwhile, Megaman needs Rush to fly at all. I actually think Astro Boy is more versatile overall. Also he has a super robotic strength due to his father creating him to be superior to every human and robot. While Rockman/Megaman was created to emulate humans.

[–]morrison_floyd 7 points8 points ago

Holy shit i did not expect Don Ramón

[–]Dtumnus 3 points4 points ago

What is this? Megaman can't fly.

[–]notanonnow 9 points10 points ago

Maybe if he had a Rush Adapter.

[–]DildoDave 3 points4 points ago

I thought Superman was 6'4" not 5'9"...

[–]EliteA 1 point2 points ago

Last time I checked, Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, Jackie Chan, and Jet Li and Tony Jaa aren't fictional characters.

[–]DrPleaser 3 points4 points ago

this was fucking AWESOME

[–]DontBlinkLoL 7 points8 points ago

Going all in here...

Hulk Mega Man Goku Legolas Alien Bruce Lee (no Chuck Norris needed) Alice Spawn + Hellboy Pecker Yoda Calvin 'n Hobbes Popeye Sonic Rocky Thor

[–]punkhobo 20 points21 points ago

sorry but alien would lose. with the exception of the first movie, is the thing with aliens is their sheer numbers, they are just cannon fodder, it would be killed from a mile away

[–]DontBlinkLoL 4 points5 points ago

This is first movie Alien. I'm an insider for these fights, sir.

[–]chthonical 14 points15 points ago

The only reason the xenomorph in Alien was so successful was because it was basically a slasher villain going against unarmed civilians. The MIB have a full loadout going into this.

It would be more a comedic stinger than a battle.

[–]PirateOwl 2 points3 points ago

I'd pay to see J and K take out a horde of them.

[–]Myrkull 4 points5 points ago

Lobo would be able to take out every single one of these fictional characters, hands down

[–]NihaoPanda 8 points9 points ago

Yeah, this guy died, got sent to hell, kicked Satans ass so much he got sent to heaven, started killing everyone (although they were already dead) until they'd send him back to earth and ended up dragging his own dismembered legs back on his back. Also, he's the only one who's ever kicked Supermans ass in without weakening him. It's not even a contest.

[–]C_K_B 2 points3 points ago

Spawn did something similar in his universe.

[–]omegashadow 4 points5 points ago

Uhhm Goku could also kick supermans ass. I am pretty sure /b/ deconstructed this.

[–]guitartablelamp 7 points8 points ago

  • Kratos would eventually kill beat Hulk; Hulk is simply not immortal, and Kratos has killed the God who literally created war. Getting bigger and stronger will not be enough to overpower Kratos' strategy.

EDIT: This seems to be a contentious statement, given the recent surge of Marvel fanship.. I wonder what the opinion would have been in 2003? Either way, I still contest that Kratos could not find a way to KO Hulk. Killing him? I forfeit to this, definitely impossible.

  • I'm not a scholar on either of these guys, but judging on video games Mega Man sure seems easy to take down, given he does not have unlimited lives.
  • I'm not a fan of Hawkeye, but he would probably win. Legolas is awesome, but simply not equipped to handle Hawkeye's modern technology. Bombs, wires, advanced strategy... Legolas would need a lot of magic, which he does not have enough alone.
  • MiB would take down the Alien down with one shot. It's their job; they would probably even know everything about it too.
  • Of course Bruce lee would win, but even with Chuck it still be an intense fight.
  • Bugs always wins, ultimate trickery beats chaos. Though in my opinion this is the only fight to end in a draw (read: total annihilation)
  • I can't make up my mind, but has anyone here seen footage of the Road Runner? Sonic is really fast, but let's not play favorites here.

[–]Paradoxius 9 points10 points ago

Hulk is simply not immortal

Let's discuss this for a moment. Please correct me if I am wrong, but I do not know of the Hulk dying in canon, and I do believe that he has been shot in the head in human form. This implies that he can hulk-up faster than a bullet to the brain can kill him. I do not know much of Kratos's power, but I do not think he has any abilities that can kill Banner faster.

This means he will be fighting the Hulk already in green-mode any way you cut it. Now let's assume that Hulk's healing powers, size, and strength all increase whenever he gets madder, and that he gets madder whenever something or someone manages to injure him in Hulk form. If Kratos can kill him instantaneously, this point is moot, but if the god's chosen attack takes time to reap mortality, and I believe his usual weapon is a blade, so that would be a yes, then the Hulk can increase in power and healing factor before he succumbs to said wounds.

Now, we know that Hulk freely and regularly defies the laws of conservation of mass and energy that things in our universe have the decency to conform to, but we must ask if this ability is unlimited. Can the Hulk, for example, continue to hulk-up more and more until nothing is big enough to make him angrier, or is there a set limit, such as city-size? If the latter is true, and Kratos is truly immortal, then Kratos would win, eventually taking down a preposterously large and powerful Hulk.

If the prior is true, however, and if Kratos is truly immortal, then this fight would be a true draw with the two of them duking it out until Hulk was the size of the universe. Picture universe-Hulk futilely crushing Kratos between his fingers, and the unscathed Kratos delivering galaxy-destroying blows to the inside of Hulk's fingerprint.

If Kratos is not truly immortal, and issue which I do not know enough about to discuss, then the latter scenario would easily end in Hulk's victory, possibly at the cost of the Earth's destruction, and the prior would be a fight we would all like to see, at a safe distance, of course.

TL;DR Depending on the limits of Hulk's powers, he might be effectively immortal.

[–]Craigellachie 5 points6 points ago

If you learn anything about comic books its this: Hulk never loses. When he's hulking out you can beat him to a pulp, slice him with blades all you want but he will not stop coming. He's been toe to toe with almost every major power in the marvel universe and basically if you make him mad there is no way to brute force kill him. He's matched immortal beings like Thor and Sentry by just being angry enough. Kratos is a total badass but I don't see him beating an enemy that cannot be beat in a straight up fight.

[–]Covane 3 points4 points ago

Hulk always wins in the end. His power in its most basic form is man's drive to survive. As that drive can't be conquered, neither can the Hulk. It's why he beats everyone at everything, when he's pushed to it.

[–]satopunch89 2 points3 points ago

Someone make a game with these characters. NOW.

[–]Clerk57 0 points1 point ago

Spelled Krypton wrong

[–]Nathan561 2 points3 points ago

sonic vs road runner. sonic, no competetion

[–]Asophis 2 points3 points ago

*strength

[–]crmsndragonwngs 2 points3 points ago

Wonder...world?

[–]mediocreatleast 0 points1 point ago

The weight classes are all wrong and the fights would not happen.

[–]im_dum 1 point2 points ago

I wish I could go to the Megaman fight, it's on my birthday.

[–]Solid_Snake_ 2 points3 points ago

Batman vs Snake

[–]HerpDaDerps 1 point2 points ago

I'm quite sure the the MIB would kick the crud out of the alien .

[–]Elions 2 points3 points ago

+1 for anything that has Chapulin in it.

[–]tk-not21 2 points3 points ago

The 4th one should have Ip-man.

He was the shit.

[–]bananapanther 0 points1 point ago

Look, I love Bruce Lee... but Neo can dodge bullets, how the hell is Bruce Lee supposed to beat him?

[–]EMP826 2 points3 points ago

That's not a compound bow, that's a recurve...

[–]Ciremo 1 point2 points ago

Here's how all the fights would turn out:

Hulk vs. Kratos
After setting the world record for the longest Quick Time Event ever, Kratos finally manages to climb on top of, gouge the eyes out of, multiply stab and dance on top of The Hulk. Unfortunately the Hulk cannot be killed, but being content with the fact that Hulk is, in fact, not a god Kratos ventures forth in his never ending quest for vengeance. Hulk perplexed!

Megaman vs. Astro Boy
Megaman and Astro Boy fight very evenly, and it is hard to tell who is the strongest. But by Astro Boy's good nature and Megaman's quest against evil, they realize that they hold no animosity towards each other and make peace with one another. Finally they agree to help each other out to put a stop to a certain villain's evil doings.

Goku vs. Superman
Being Goku, this fight does involve exploding planets and transuniversal combat. Superman obviously has the upper hand (what with being invincible and all) until Goku by chance manages in his 74th power up to throw the planet Krypton AT Superman. Superman is reduced to a crisp while his clothes remain remarkably untarnished and Goku finally gets himself a space flight cloak.

Legolas vs. Hawkeye
While starting out as a any other battle, with skill shots and agile flips and tricks and what not, this scenario soon takes a predictable turn. Never before has so many one-liners been spewed at each other, and soon the fight has turned into a duel of words. Legolas' proudly and charmingly throws down the biggest shitstorm of taunts while Gimli whimpers away in a corner out of professional experience. Hawkeye remains cool and steadfast while rocking the solidest game face Legolas has ever seen. They batter at each other and it's unsure who will win. And as they get into each others face ever so slowly, their lips soon touch and.. uh.. let's just call it a draw. Please. Now. Stop it. GUYS, IT'S GAME OVER PLEASE STOP ALREADY!!!

Alien vs MIB
The MIB guys enter the arena and J is ready to give Alien a black, comedic and savvy OH MY GOD HIS FACE IS MELTING!! Meanwhile K realizes the deep shit he's into and contemplates: "I'm too old for this shit" and forfeits. The Alien continues to eat every brain of the audience and no one is left alive to announce the result. But K later admitted to "having a bad day."

Unfortunately I'm out of time and need to go back from my lunch break. But if anyone likes I could finish writing about the rest of the picture later :)

[–]Jomo28 4 points5 points ago

I didn't realize a Norse god was American

[–]SoSneaky91 5 points6 points ago

There are a lot of errors in this. I'm pretty sure hawkeye uses a recurve bow not a compound bow.

[–]askLing 3 points4 points ago

Sorry there guess I didn't know Vegeta was a planet....

[–]dark-panda 7 points8 points ago

As it happens:

http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Planet_Vegeta

Planet Vegeta (惑星ベジータ, Wakusei Bejīta), formerly known as Planet Plant, is the home planet of Goku, Vegeta, and all other native Saiyans, Tuffles and Plants in the Dragon Ball franchise.

Yeah, I had no idea. I thought "Vegeta" was just the name of the "over 9000" dude. The More You Know.

[–]Weis 3 points4 points ago

Vegeta is the prince of the planet. He's named after the family. Get it?

[–]Doctor_Loggins 2 points3 points ago

1) Hulk. Because Hulk.

2) Mega-Man. Multiple modules increase tactical flexibility.

3) Goku. Speeding bullets are fast. Instant is faster.

4) Legolas

5) Alien kills J, K kills alien. If multiple Aliens, then Aliens.

6) Ong Bak alone is enough to convince me that Chuck and Bruce are dead. Muay Boran is fucking brutal. OTOH, karate. The Dane Cook of martial arts.

7) Alice. Bitch knows how to snicker-snack.

8) Spawn and Hellboy, but it'd be close.

9) Bugs with the "Dying rabbit's last smooch" gag.

10) Yoda. He's a souljah.

11) Calvin and Hobbes. Dat transmogrifier.

12) Popeye. "France." Need I say more?

13) Sonic, unless Wyle E. Coyote is trying to tamper with the race. Roadrunner's speed is directly proportional to how hard someone is trying to kill him.

14) Balboa. Because ADRIAAAAAAAAAAAN is watching.

15) Thor. He's got thunder. It's super effective. El Chapulin was paralyzed!

[–]wackywiener 0 points1 point ago

This is the more accurate break down.

[–]2udaylatif 1 point2 points ago

Love it!

[–]LUCHER 1 point2 points ago

A sonic and roadrunner race would be pretty cool

[–]J4k0b42 -1 points0 points ago

[–]sGAcid 1 point2 points ago

These match ups are all actually dead on. Would be great fights.

[–]ScruffyMcgruff 1 point2 points ago

I would like to know what Kratos' "Blood Shild" is.

[–]Sandvicheater 1 point2 points ago

Goku with Spirit bomb collected from the ki of the entire universe owns all.

[–]ghost_victim 0 points1 point ago

Bobby's World. My god. Nostalgia wave.

[–]Kiowa707 1 point2 points ago

I thank my hispanic(Mexican) heritage for laughing at the last two.

[–]luisk91 -1 points0 points ago

I'm sorry but the mexican dude with the hat is called "Don Ramon" the name in the poster is clearly portuguese