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828
829

Seems legit. (imgur.com)

submitted ago by firstassistant8677

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[–]PriscillaPresley 104 points105 points ago

That is one hot grasshopper.

[–]jpro8 25 points26 points ago

It is super hot. I just want to know where you find them that big. I need to move to where ever that is.

[–]Nisas 44 points45 points ago

Gay marriage opens the door to giant mutant grasshoppers.

[–]G00DLuck 25 points26 points ago

I know, awesome, right?

I support it even more now.

[–]AnotherClosetAtheist 10 points11 points ago

I'm completely against it. Keeping up with all the human sex lingo is hard enough.

I mean, I can barely remember the difference between a Dirty Sanchez and a Dirty Rodruiguez. Then there is the Jelly Donut, Angry Dragon, Cleveland Steamer, Alligator Fuckhouse (DOES NOT INVOLVE AN ALLIGATOR), Hot Carl, Rusty Trombone, Blumpkins, Angry Pirates.

The list is unending. And that's just for humans!

But now we have to come up with terms for fish and birds and insects and shit. I mean, birds have goddamn cloacas! How are you supposed to Spacedock a chicken?

Fish don't even have penetrative sex. They just blow their eggs and sperm all over each other already.

Let's not even get started on all the terms you'll have to learn for interspecial shit.

I'm just an old man barely keeping up in a young man's world.

[–]That_Dude_Dozer 2 points3 points ago

Googled Alligator Fuckhouse. Was not displeased.

[–]EpicOreo 1 point2 points ago

Your post just made my day.

[–]scurvebeard -1 points0 points ago

Assuming Spacedock is what we call a Spaceship Docking. I like yours better. Brevity, you know.

[–]AnotherClosetAtheist 0 points1 point ago

My travels across urbandictionary.com have led me to places I wish I had not tread. Evil things lie deep within the dark caverns of the earth. Tis where Gandalf fell in the mines.

[–]DaveBeCrazy 9 points10 points ago

It is all part of the liberal satanic science agenda, first gay marriage, then mutant "evolution-proving" grasshoppers.

[–]paladin_ranger 0 points1 point ago

They're still of the same kind, so no evolution happened! Praise Him!

[–]spacexplosion 0 points1 point ago

came here to say this

[–]PraiseBeToScience 20 points21 points ago

The Carboniferous Period

[–]monochr 11 points12 points ago

60 million years of nope.

[–]AnonymousAutonomous 1 point2 points ago

It is nope at best.

[–]TheBranleur 1 point2 points ago

I first read that as 60 million years of hope :(

[–]ticktalik 2 points3 points ago

Go to New Zealand and do some genetic engineering on these guys.

[–]jpro8 0 points1 point ago

holy shit. that's one scary son of a bitch

[–]SuperBeast4721 0 points1 point ago

You've never watched hentai have you?

[–]jpro8 0 points1 point ago

I don't lol. but I do get a kick out of what people think ;-)

[–]Itziclinic 19 points20 points ago

Nice try, Kafka!

[–]Elbardo 0 points1 point ago

He wrote about giant grasshoppers? What is the title?

[–]bluescreen1988 0 points1 point ago

I think he is referencing The Metamorphosis.

[–]thecritic06 0 points1 point ago

That's just a 'vermin' isn't it? It's only interpreted as being an insect.

[–]bluescreen1988 1 point2 points ago

Of course you can have different interpretations of what it was. Including whether he actually transformed or did not. An insect, as you said, is just one of the possible interpretations.

[–]chubowu 12 points13 points ago

http://i.imgur.com/h2JFx.gif

[–]AeitZean 4 points5 points ago

i love that gif, its awesome! what is the show called, or are there more anywhere? thanks.

[–]Divotus 8 points9 points ago

So Im not alone in my giant grasshopper fetish?

[–]Argentum47 5 points6 points ago

So I'm not alone in my dolphin fetish? Cause that's not a problem!

[–]trunten8 1 point2 points ago

What is it with modern cartoons and CalArts grads that produce such quality dolphin jokes?

[–]RaelSquonk 7 points8 points ago

That grasshopper really snatches the pebble from my hand, if you know what I mean.

[–]tonyvila 4 points5 points ago

handles the pebble on my snatch

FTFY

[–]caribou16 7 points8 points ago

Stupid sexy grasshoppers.

[–]a_hundred_boners 3 points4 points ago

i thought it was a robot

[–]PriscillaPresley 1 point2 points ago

They do tend to be against sex toys too

[–]honestysrevival 2 points3 points ago

Awww yeah, baby, come over here, we'll make sweet, sweet music together

cricket, cricket

Aww yeah, baby, that's what I like to hear.

[–]scurvebeard 0 points1 point ago

I thought it was an android.

I support robosexual intercourse.

[–]bottjen244 1 point2 points ago

Ok i can deal with the dog, cat, duck, even the horse. But the grasshopper is crossing a line don't ya think?

[–]PriscillaPresley 21 points22 points ago

I can't help it; musicians are sexy.

[–]bottjen244 5 points6 points ago

bahahaha

[–]0l01o1ol0 0 points1 point ago

I don't care that it's kissing a dude, but that is one HUGE grasshopper.

[–]I_live_4_me 1 point2 points ago

comedians hide behind lies... please do not fornicate with the animals.

load more comments (2 replies)

    [–]darkdoom 72 points73 points ago

    Horse on duck action is already legal, actually. I don't think we have laws about animal inter-species relationships.

    [–]rasputine 30 points31 points ago

    Even if we did, I don't think either of them are fit to stand trial.

    [–]CrazyCalYa 37 points38 points ago

    "And you, Sir Duck, are sentenced to 3 years without the chance of parole, you should be ashamed of yourself. Consider yourself lucky you plead guilty."

    "I didn't say I was guilty, all I said was that I was feeling a little hoarse!"

    [–]Argentum47 10 points11 points ago

    "And you can't take the psychologist's testimony! He's a quack!

    [–]Grindstone50k -2 points-1 points ago

    Becareful with those puns, the someone might hit you with a mallard.

    [–]Discord_agent 6 points7 points ago

    "That Ms. Duck, asshole."

    [–]frotc914 0 points1 point ago

    "Well then we'll be adding HOMOSEXUAL inter-species sex to the charges!"

    [–]Kyrgizion 5 points6 points ago

    That didn't stop people (especially in the olden days) from putting them up on trial and executing them for imaginary crimes, though.

    I can't say I believe in reincarnation, but if I'd have lived in those times, I would probably be executed many times over because I couldn't keep my yap shut.

    [–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

    Now I'm just a simple country chicken, but even I BAAAAWK can tell my client is being falsely BAAAAWK accused.

    [–]thetheist 26 points27 points ago

    Nobody cares what horses and ducks do behind closed barn doors. The problem happens when you let them get married. It destroys the whole institution of marriage. Why, horses and ducks don't even have fingers to put a ring on, nor can they speak their wedding vows. Let's face it, there is a clear line when it comes to marriage. Marriage is only appropriate for humans, gorillas, chimpanzees, and a select few other apes and monkeys.

    [–]Darkniki 4 points5 points ago

    And parrots!

    [–]thetheist 2 points3 points ago

    "And do you, Polly, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

    "Pretty bride! Pretty bride!"

    [–]Coca_Cola_for_blood 65 points66 points ago

    We all know that some republicans don't fully understand what consent is.

    [–]DaveBeCrazy 4 points5 points ago

    Didn't Akin and others just let us know that they believe it is all consent. No exceptions.

    [–]alps25 3 points4 points ago

    |Insert picture of Ashton Kutcher saying "BURN!" here|

    [–]Argentum47 13 points14 points ago

    FTFY

    [–]alps25 0 points1 point ago

    Thank you kindly.

    [–]Misanthropic_asshole 27 points28 points ago

    This is from Christwire; a satire site. http://christwire.org/2009/07/immoral-chinase-create-people-kissing-animal-pictures/

    [–]firstassistant8677[S] 40 points41 points ago

    That's funny, because when i found it on FB it was actually being used in a serious sense. They meant this shit.

    [–]JakeCameraAction 20 points21 points ago

    Poe's Law.

    [–]monochr 6 points7 points ago

    ctrl-f poe's law - yep did not disappoint.

    Seriously, how can we make fun of these people. They already do it for us.

    [–]IamSparticles 0 points1 point ago

    It goes both ways. Sometimes people who really think that way mistake satire for a valid argument.

    [–]SaintGenesius 0 points1 point ago

    I'm pretty sure that's what he was implying. That's what I got from it anyway.

    [–]Tachyx 0 points1 point ago

    Constant hypocrisy and exposure to the hypocrisy of others burns out the part of the brain that allows them to detect irony, satire, and parody along with hypocrisy. What you really need are tests that require people to be able to make these distinctions in order to be admitted into adult life.

    [–]CalvinLawson 12 points13 points ago

    Seriously? You should comment and post to the original; let them know they're IRL satire.

    [–]Misanthropic_asshole 9 points10 points ago

    Have fun with your new knowledge.

    [–]Nisas 4 points5 points ago

    I figured it was probably satire. It's too well drawn for bigots.

    [–]redditmaid 2 points3 points ago

    But this argument is still being used by fundies, even without this specific image. I've heard it before. "If you legalize gay marriage, what will be legal next, man marrying animal!"

    [–]Doopx4 16 points17 points ago

    Hm. This is not my proudest boner.

    [–]Discord_agent 3 points4 points ago

    Are your boners usually proud?

    [–]tarrox1992 1 point2 points ago

    Mine usually stand proudly...

    [–]Discord_agent 2 points3 points ago

    Do they march in pride parades too?

    [–]Tachyx 0 points1 point ago

    Not the Spanish Inquisition I'm afraid.

    [–]Discord_agent 1 point2 points ago

    Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.

    [–]orangasm 23 points24 points ago

    Is that supposed to be a gay girl eating pussy? Bah dump ching!!

    [–]precisi0n86 8 points9 points ago

    Well the guy is making out with a total dog. She can be such a bitch.

    [–]superspin678 9 points10 points ago

    Anyone else get off from this picture?

    [–]skitnerdig 11 points12 points ago

    Just like allowing females the right to vote led to cats and hamsters and such voting.

    [–]evolsteve 0 points1 point ago

    Why shouldn't cats and hamsters have the right to vote?

    [–]skitnerdig 0 points1 point ago

    According to the proposed theory, they do.

    [–]Aitioma 10 points11 points ago

    As a furry... that's hawt.

    [–]KarnBlueEarring 1 point2 points ago

    As a furry, I support that statement.

    [–]Attheveryend 7 points8 points ago

    Ridiculous. Nobody opens their mouth that widely for a serious kiss.

    [–]8bitAntelope 4 points5 points ago

    I came here to see if anyone else had the same sentiment. Seriously. Nobody opens their mouth that wide to kiss someone, that's disgusting. At that point you're just trying to eat each other's face.

    [–]Attheveryend 0 points1 point ago

    Excellent. Let us begin the "shut your damn mouth" movement immediately! I'll go pick up some dog muzzles and we can burn those in peoples front yards to let them know we find their open-mouth-kissing behavior inappropriate.

    [–]100ft_pizzawave 5 points6 points ago

    Pretty sure the source image is somehow connected to Ariel Pink. He definitely used one of those for his Round And Round EP cover.

    [–]All_Fallible 8 points9 points ago

    What the fuck is that last image? I can't even... Why the fuck would that ever be someone's concern?

    [–]Zooky_the_Bear 3 points4 points ago

    They obviously never heard about Rule 34.

    [–]LordSeraphim 3 points4 points ago

    What are the images actually from? Because I thought it had to do with this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiLqAu4s-_s

    [–]Vagrant_Antelope 0 points1 point ago

    Came here to post the same thing! Didn't realise there were others in the series. Classic weird Ariel Pink...

    [–]Muame 4 points5 points ago

    Scratchy kitty tongue.

    [–]coyote1284 0 points1 point ago

    ...is kinky.

    [–]DeepFriedPanda 4 points5 points ago

    I have the most confusing boner right now.

    [–]WILDCOX 7 points8 points ago

    Don't fight it

    [–]yeathl 0 points1 point ago

    Please tell me that's sarcasm and not a real anti-gay marriage message!

    [–]WILDCOX 2 points3 points ago

    A woman is kissing a pussy...so I mean it's not THAT far fetched

    [–]guyver_dio 1 point2 points ago

    So what if a duck and deer want to get married. More power to them.

    [–]RobertTheSpruce 2 points3 points ago

    IF YOU RAPE A HORSE, IT HAS SPECIAL DEFENSE MECHANISMS TO PREVENT IT FROM GETTING PREGNANT!

    [–]ToastyRaichu 2 points3 points ago

    Yeah, those fucking painful hind legs

    [–]lilylupo95 2 points3 points ago

    Ha! This post... it amuses me. (Because IAMA furry)

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

    What's next, icecream?!

    [–]TheNoize 0 points1 point ago

    Suddenly I feel an urge to live in a world where this stuff actually happens.

    [–]Discord_agent 0 points1 point ago

    This pic reminds me of Ghostbusters

    [–]Vivipwns26 1 point2 points ago

    I've always wondered what it would look like when a horse and a duck make out. Now I know....

    [–]goooorrrrrrrrn 1 point2 points ago

    And knowing is half the battle.

    [–]nikipinz 0 points1 point ago

    If these assholes are really comparing my girlfriend to a dog, I'm going to have to ask them to step outside.

    [–]JohnBornMarch16th 0 points1 point ago

    Was expecting a X-post from /r/wtf ..... because seriously...wtf.

    [–]rj20876 0 points1 point ago

    Is it forbidden for a Deer to a Duck actually?

    [–]Gracksploitation 1 point2 points ago

    I kinda wish this was the first time I saw somebody in an amorous relationship with an animal. This week.

    [–]Kahvikone 1 point2 points ago

    They all seem consenting to me.

    [–]Traptin_85 -1 points0 points ago

    I'm so hard right now

    [–]MaybeTricky 0 points1 point ago

    I think the team behind this might have an issue or ten that need addressing.

    [–]Arrow156 1 point2 points ago

    Yes, cause homosexuality is directly related to bestiality. And what's with the last pic? Half the crazy religious ladies I know have made up wedding for their pets all the time, like so. How is that any different?

    [–]Mosethyoth 0 points1 point ago

    TRUE CHRISTIANS REGARD INTERRACIAL MARRIAGE AS SINFUL!!! DOGS ARE ALOWED TO MARRY BITCHES!!!

    (Actually most of my religious friends would laugh about this)

    [–]dumnezero 0 points1 point ago

    That's a pretty good drawing.

    [–]kingkobeda 0 points1 point ago

    Hot dang, I want me some hot Duck on Horse action.

    [–]TalonX1982 0 points1 point ago

    That duck...I...I have to go...to the bathroom..for a few minutes..where'd I put my lube...

    [–]TheActualAWdeV 0 points1 point ago

    How neat that they taught their pets how to do CPR.

    [–]EscherTheLizard 0 points1 point ago

    I should just create an index of responses to fallacies like this in order to shortcut the process of replying to them.

    [–]joshdaddy1 1 point2 points ago

    This belongs in r/WTF

    [–]cheruchan 1 point2 points ago

    That's one big ass bug.

    [–]Painwalker 1 point2 points ago

    Crud I've wandered into "that part of the internet" again...

    [–]analogkid1 0 points1 point ago

    Gay marriage : The gateway marriage.

    [–]larlyB 0 points1 point ago

    yeah, im sure that cat wouldnt be clawing her fucking eyes out... wtf

    [–]blackasssnake 0 points1 point ago

    that last frame pressed my on button. mmmmm

    [–]Amuter 1 point2 points ago

    Dafuq is wrong with these Christians imagination?

    [–]Calebcummings 0 points1 point ago

    Why should i stand in the way of horse-duck love

    [–]madc0wdisease 1 point2 points ago

    Imagine having to sit down and actually draw those pictures.

    [–]veggiesama 1 point2 points ago

    First the liberals want gays to get married. Next thing you know we'll be marrying animals! THEN WHO WILL STOP THE FUCKING FURRIES?

    [–]citizenpep 1 point2 points ago

    BTW, the artwork is by Saiman Chow

    [–]inappropriate_hugs 0 points1 point ago

    We let the gays get married, and everything just started fucking! It was Chaos! Sticky Chaos!

    Also, why is "gay" in quotes? Are they unsure whether the marriage they're talking about is gay or not? Or, are they trying to say it's two straight men/women are trying to get "gay" married?

    [–]PGH_Snake 0 points1 point ago

    This belongs in r/wtf :P

    [–]negativekarmas 0 points1 point ago

    Moar! Sauce?

    [–]ConnorSuttree 0 points1 point ago

    I think whoever drew the pictures for this poster just really wanted to draw those pictures.

    And to masturbate...

    [–]DRC174 0 points1 point ago

    I wouldn't mind seeing girls stick their tongue into a pussy

    [–]pingthepong -1 points0 points ago

    That's just as disturbing as seeing two guys kissing. Not that I'm against it...it just isn't the way my brain is wired. No amount of funny pictures is going to change that.

    [–]ggpurehope 0 points1 point ago

    wtf

    [–]BuddhistNudist987 0 points1 point ago

    I'd pay through the nose to get a blowjob from a deer, know what I mean?

    [–]0l01o1ol0 1 point2 points ago

    One of the reasons I don't like exaggeration and satire used as actual arguments (I like them for humor) is that they work better the more narrow- and like-minded your audience is.

    You guys are laughing at how ridiculous this is, but this argument would work on the intended audience for a comic like this specifically because their worldview is so narrow.

    Now imagine that you're back in the '50s, and at a debate trying to argue for legalizing mixed-race marriage (yes it was illegal at one point), and your opponent comes up with, "Why, if we let blacks and whites marry, what's to stop two men from marrying?"

    And the audience nods in agreement, and votes against legalizing mixed marriage.

    Just something I think about whenever I chuckle at exaggerated depictions of religion in South Park or on r/atheism.

    [–]nxtm4n 1 point2 points ago

    Gay marriage is a gateway marriage.

    [–]ShadowAssassinQueef 0 points1 point ago

    Who doesn't french pussies?

    [–]chrisawhitmore 1 point2 points ago

    Gay marriage: On the plus side, we get either tiny horses or giant ducks. Both of those things are awesome. Oh and Giant sexy grasshoppers..

    [–]chrisawhitmore 0 points1 point ago

    Oh, and on a serious note, another case of christians failing to understand consent. Probably why they keep buggering choirboys.

    [–]LobstercockHatesFags 0 points1 point ago

    Yes. And the problem with bestiality is... ?

    [–]urbanturtlefarm 1 point2 points ago

    We had a duck who would constantly chase a huge buff goose (easily four times his side) around and sometimes... you know... catch her. I completely blame the liberal agenda for his untimely death (geese are extremely loud when being chased/raped) and a l'orangeness.

    [–]fuzzy223 0 points1 point ago

    The person kissing the bug freaks me out.

    [–]Nerada 0 points1 point ago

    Thought of this

    [–]delegable94 0 points1 point ago

    Don't fight it.

    [–]vilapacata 0 points1 point ago

    Is that a horse (or a goat) kissing a duck? I mean... that's so immoral that should be ilegal.

    I'm anti DUCK-HORSE mariage!

    [–]coyote1284 0 points1 point ago

    Obama supports interspecies relationships and alien invasions. Do you? VOTE REPUBLICAN!

    [–]Legoking -1 points0 points ago

    While this poster brings up a somewhat valid point, i don't see beastiality being legalized anytime soon. I think the only reason gay marriage is allowed in some places is because 2 guys or 2 girls can both consent to a relationship and can both consent to sexual activity. However, an animal has no way of communicating whether it "approves" of the relationship and sexual intercourse, so I don't think beastiality will be legalized any time soon.

    I know this sounds weird, but I'm just explaining my thoughts in the easiest way possible.

    [–]coyote1284 1 point2 points ago

    Assuming the poster is not satire; the fact that animals cannot consent is what makes the point invalid.

    [–]ZeroGSpaceCow 0 points1 point ago

    That is hilarious, and certainly a parody.

    [–]45ttt 0 points1 point ago

    is anyone rule 34-ing the duck and horse makeout lovins? At work and can't google it.

    [–]bradwasheresoyeah 1 point2 points ago

    Is this a real poster trying to argue against gay-marriage? Sometimes the line between satire and true stupidity is a fine one

    [–]Adnoz 0 points1 point ago

    Why would a horse make out with a duck?? Horses eat ducks, you dumb fucks!! It's like me making out with a rattlesnake. Get smart people!

    [–]Rflkt 0 points1 point ago

    You're not supposed to do that? Now it makes sense why people stare at me while I'm at the park with my dog.

    [–]ghostoast10 1 point2 points ago

    That really stupid, my dog doesn't close his eyes when we kiss.

    [–]5k3k73k 0 points1 point ago

    Neither do you.

    [–]DrTroglodyte 0 points1 point ago

    I think that lower left picture is from the sequel to The Metamorphosis.

    [–]Bummstoff 0 points1 point ago

    1: A cat is fine too

    2: Google "Bondage Fairies".

    [–]coastermonger 0 points1 point ago

    Just your average redditor in the top right panel then

    [–]spongelover21 1 point2 points ago

    except in gay marriage it is between two consenting adults.. but hey.. mutant grasshoppers are cool too.

    [–]fjphoenix 0 points1 point ago

    Lol this pic is awesome. It changed my world i didnt support gay marriage but if this is what leads to then; let all the faggots marry and then i will finally be able to marry my dog.

    [–]thecritic06 0 points1 point ago

    Well, that's my next four profile pictures decided.

    [–]penguin_sweater 0 points1 point ago

    Wat.

    [–]grotms 0 points1 point ago

    Can anyone actually explain the logic behind gay marriage leading to marriage between a human and an animal? I've heard the argument used before but I've never understood it.

    [–]Mythandros 0 points1 point ago

    ... WTF, really?!

    Really... WTF?!

    [–]Grindstone50k 0 points1 point ago

    Am I the only one who though there was a bunch of CPR going on?

    [–]N0v1K 1 point2 points ago

    is it that hard to understand "consent"? if the animal cant give consent then it voids a mariage!

    [–]Kindoalkun 0 points1 point ago

    Lesbian Marriage first. I mean, let's not kid ourselves...male-to-male anal sex is holding this movement back.

    [–]orangebot 0 points1 point ago

    this is the coolest fucking picture i have seen in 2012. i can't stop laughing.

    [–]BadFengShui 1 point2 points ago

    This could make for a very strange CPR manual.

    [–]TGOT 0 points1 point ago

    My response to that would be "find me a grasshopper that can sign its name and give consent, then we'll talk."

    [–]Littleguyyy 0 points1 point ago

    Kitten-humans would be cute.

    [–]Aavagadrro 0 points1 point ago

    So gay marriage means we will share food with animals like birds feed their young?

    How does that work?

    [–]Swiss_Cheese9797 1 point2 points ago

    '50 Shades of Grey' meets 'Animorphs'

    [–]captainburnz 1 point2 points ago

    50 Shades of Animorphs

    [–]jarred0809 0 points1 point ago

    Gay marriage and giant insect people? Sign me up!

    [–]possosso 0 points1 point ago

    My dog kissed a cat once, and liked it...I blame the athiests

    [–]TacoTuesdays 0 points1 point ago

    My dog doesn't kiss that good

    [–]TheEmoPanda 0 points1 point ago

    Ehh tried it on both a dog and a cat. The dog just gently bit my tongue and the cat ran away from me. Also, no erections or romantic feelings of any kind.

    [–]jpro8 0 points1 point ago

    I don't care what anyone says. That beautiful grasshopper has like 6 arms to hold me, and I won't even talk about those mandibles ;-)

    [–]Glykeria 1 point2 points ago

    Why is Sarah Jessica Parker kissing a duck? =O

    [–]turgore -1 points0 points ago

    This is the biggest slippery slope in history.

    [–]Discord_agent -4 points-3 points ago

    No, that would be your mother's cunt.

    [–]Dazam 1 point2 points ago

    Rule #34, and how!

    [–]Choscura -1 points0 points ago

    Wait, what's wrong with this again?

    Oh, right. Stupid Christians again.

    load more comments (5 replies)

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