You think that is mean? Imagine if you were at the climax of passionate lovemaking. To note; I am assuming you have a penis, if not, then let us say you have accrued a working penis by some means (most of this works better if you are working with a fresh new wing-dang). Now back to the sex. So you are at your climax, and you decide to finish on your partners face. During ejaculation, I run out wearing a top hat and a toga and shove a souvenir mini American flag into your urethra. I shout "Take that Communism" while seven pre-op transgenders come out in bikinis singing America the beautiful.

Now, the curtains part, and it all turns out to be an elaborate lead in to this years Oscars. Nobody gets the joke, so Robert Downey jr. and Scarlett Johansson quickly move on to the night's winners for best supporting actress. Enraged that she lost to Halle Berry, Mila Kunis approaches the stage and shoots Robert in the head with a .44 magnum. She undresses, adorns herself with a metal strapon, and proceeds to peg the bullet hole while yelling "I hope this steel is good enough for Iron Man!!!!".

This is all too much for Scarlett, who miscarries onstage. Knowing my part in this world, I immediately begin nibbling on the fetus. By this point I have lost my toga revealing my distended and skeletal body. I keep the top hat so as to avoid giving an impression of lacking class. Now, a butch lesbian in a Ronald Reagan mask comes on stage and berates you for failing your country. "Even that blood and semen covered mini flag sticking out of your fresh new wing-dang doesn't hide your Communist tendencies!". While you are now saddened, a naked Floridian negro begins sniffing at your face hungrily. I chase him off though... because you have such a baby face.

That would be mean. So don't go thinking that rocks are the worst we can do here on Reddit.

TL;DR