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all 70 comments

[–]CR4ZY0WN3R 83 points84 points ago

"You see your honour, Siri is an AI, who talks"

"yes, go on"

"and Jarvis is an AI, who also talks"

"The court finds Tony Stark...Guilty!"

[–]Thor4269 30 points31 points ago

Jarvis would be his own legal defendant

[–]peaceshot 15 points16 points ago

Well actually, Siri is only a VI; i.e. pre-programmed responses and cannot create new responses or combine individual words and phrases to form new ones not already programmed.

[–]svullenballe 7 points8 points ago

You mean Siri isn't actual artificial intelligence? Well spank my ass and call me Charlie!

[–]ipsumdolorsitamet 11 points12 points ago

spank

CHARLIE!

[–]sargent254 -1 points0 points ago

This was difficult, but not impossible, to fap to.

[–]moogoesthecat 0 points1 point ago

Yes, Siri is a technically a VI; it's pre-programmed responses with voice synthesis to read them.

[–]rderekp 12 points13 points ago

And, of course, AIs are illegal under the Citadel Conventions.

[–]FortunePaw 2 points3 points ago

Also, we already dismissed any of the so call "reapers" claim.

[–]Reaper_Harbinger 2 points3 points ago

WE ARE NOT THE REAPER YOU ARE LOOKING FOR, HUMAN. MOVE ALONG.

[–]ew73 1 point2 points ago

'Cause that will stop Cerberus.

[–]Reverent 34 points35 points ago

The movie ends when Apple demands a trial by jury in Texas. Tony Stark wins by being simultaneously charming, alcoholic and shooting big expensive guns into the air. Jury deliberation takes 15 seconds.

[–]straighttoplaid 58 points59 points ago

To be honest, Tony Stark most likely kept the arc reactor technology (at least the miniturized one) as a trade secret rather than patenting it. If you patent something you need to explain a fair amount on how to make it. Many times inventors and companies will choose to keep something as a trade secret which denies them the legal exclusivity of a patent but allows them to keep information about how to make it under wraps.

Of course, with the patent law in the US changing from "first to invent" to "first to file" Tony could find that one of his rivals will file for a patent on something that he's already invented. That could lead to a pretty complicated courtroom battle because it would be hard for Tony to claim prior art on something that no one else knows how it works or is made.

[–]Chinook700 1 point2 points ago

The funny thing is none of this really matters to Tony because his #1 priority is keeping it a secret from his enemies. Its not like he is trying to sell an ARC reactor to every family to power their microwaves and refrigerators.

[–]some88d00d 2 points3 points ago

So Iron Man 3 will look eerily similar to Dark Knight Rises when (spoiler) the main villain steals all of Tony Starks' suits and proceeds to perform a hostile takeover of New York...

[–]ebrigby 1 point2 points ago

As soon as I read prior art, I knew you weren't bullshitting.

Formerly a paralegal in IP

[–]straighttoplaid 0 points1 point ago

I know enough to be mildly dangerous. While I'm not in a legal profession I've had a few things I've cooked up get submitted for patents or published defensively.

[–]Im_MrBucket 17 points18 points ago

That's probably for the best. My favorite part of Iron Man 2 was Tony Stark's performance in front of the Senate Armed Services Committee.

Franklish and Bash is a horribly written show, but I'd watch 10 hours of it if Tony Stark was on trial.

[–]Jigsus 2 points3 points ago

Speaking of Iron Man 2 how did the war machine armor work without an arc reactor? Why was Rhody able to steal it?

[–]FluffyLion 9 points10 points ago

It ran on black power, obviously.

[–]sargent254 0 points1 point ago

Watch remember the titans, its obviously soul power.

[–]sarahpalinstesticles 5 points6 points ago

I never understood that either. I just assumed it had a mini one built in.

[–]aznhallz 0 points1 point ago

I don't know how it worked but I always thought in the movie it was implied Tony just let him have it.

[–]Jigsus 0 points1 point ago

I agree but I was annoyed no character seemed to acknowledge the fact that it worked without tony's reactor.

[–]EyebrowZing 2 points3 points ago

I was always under the impression that the suits were all powered by their own arc reactors and that Tony's reactor was simply to generate the magnetic field to keep the shrapnel in in chest from burrowing into his heart. The first reactor he built in the cave would have served the dual purpose of powering the cave suit and keeping him alive, it's just likely after that he kept the reactor in his chest because of the eccentric genius billionaire he is. He did survive well enough being wired to a car battery, so I'm sure there is some medical technology out there already that could be adapted to his condition, but like I said, he's eccentric.

[–]Jigsus 2 points3 points ago

The point is very clearly made during the court hearings in both movies. The government can take the suits from his home but his arc reactor is what powers them. We see in the first one that the suit has an arc reactor "expander" with a secondary ring in it probably to boost the power output of the system.

[–]ztherion 2 points3 points ago

The War Machine suit uses Stark's old arc reactor, and the US government has control of it.

[–]pakattak 0 points1 point ago

Answer: because it's a comic book movie.

[–]revengeofrosencrantz 1 point2 points ago

This isn't relevant to Iron Man, but I feel like Franklin and Bash should be the name of a children's show. "And now back to the Krazy Adventures of Franklin and Bash!"

[–]rincewind4x2 24 points25 points ago

... this will be Tony Stark's greatest battle yet

[–]Late_Night_Grumbler 14 points15 points ago

[–]sargent254 0 points1 point ago

OVERRULED

[–]FilterOutBullshit3 8 points9 points ago

[–]edwardunknown 4 points5 points ago

Rhodes accidentally breaks out all the prisoners at the Vault

Dammit Rhodey you're the worst sidekick ever.

[–]fireawesome 12 points13 points ago

So then is Samsung the love interest in the movie?

[–]feureau 10 points11 points ago

They sell parts for both sides of the patent war.

[–]oldmansteven 6 points7 points ago

but the suit isn't a rectangular box with curved edges, Apple's case is ruined!

[–]nodefect 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, if anything the case in IM2 looks like the original XBox.

[–]EPAP5oQFd 4 points5 points ago

This is merely a phantom menace quietly backed by the International Trade Federation. Once the Iron Man patents are invalidated, China will repurpose all Apple assembly lines into manufacturing Mark VII clones. An international dispute arises when Vladimir Putin and Sarah Palin claim to have shot the same black bear (both while topless). China steps in with it's army of "peacekeepers" and we all bow down to our new overlords. Until some sort of new hope comes along or something.

[–]CoriJane -1 points0 points ago

[–]volar92 0 points1 point ago

Seems legit.

[–]WhatIfItWereTrue 2 points3 points ago

Yes but can siri do this... Jarvis, yip yip

[–]cremmler 3 points4 points ago

I hope this Apple thing keeps going for years!!

[–]FalconOne 3 points4 points ago

Oh yea, its great until Apple tries to go after reddit for just talking about it.

[–]opie92 3 points4 points ago

Why does it always have to be a fb post. You could have a Word Document with this joke and I would still upvote. Something about this fake fb posts just seems wrong and dirty

[–]volar92 0 points1 point ago

I miss the good old Powerpoint jokes people sent via email :(

[–]iwhdjxopajqhghd 3 points4 points ago

The plot of Iron Man 3 will center around Stark controlling an army of Mark suits. If there's interest, I can share my source of info.

[–]sargent254 0 points1 point ago

I was hoping it would be tony against the mandarin and fin fang foom, seeing how it dealt with his opposite in each movie. His opposite in business, his opposite in intelligence, and this would be magic vs science. Accesory vs armor. But interest in source is reached

[–]markman71122 2 points3 points ago

Apple probably won.

[–]theoldpretender 2 points3 points ago

The beginning of Ultimate Iron Man was based on a similar thread. Someone gained control of the company, but since Stark never patented anything, they had no idea how to make anything and stark just started over in his garage.

[–]anymooseposter 1 point2 points ago

Jony Ive is Iron Man

And he's back in hardware mode

[–]anymooseposter 1 point2 points ago

Iron Aluminum Man

[–]Bbmaster91 2 points3 points ago

He needs to work with apple on that one

[–]danoll 0 points1 point ago

Apple. Heh.

[–]you_sir_are_wrong -1 points0 points ago

Incorrect, bad guys give no fucks about patents

[–]artydecor 0 points1 point ago

Law & Order: Patent Investigators

[–]jackpype 0 points1 point ago

still better than watching batman crippled, imprisoned, or getting his ass kicked for 80% of the movie.

[–]Xenochrist 0 points1 point ago

If they really want to use viral marketing then they should. Reddit would never shut up about it.

[–]FaptainAwesome 0 points1 point ago

At least he kept all the colors the same so as to better hide his identity as the OP and the last comment

[–]jprimexg3 1 point2 points ago

Mandarin for Iron man 3 villain!!!!!

[–]sargent254 0 points1 point ago

YES.

[–]Nkogneeto[!] 1 point2 points ago

Why does everybody think it will be 'Tony Stark v Apple'; I think what we're all missing is that Tony Start and Apple are in an alliance. IRL Case in point: http://www.amazon.com/Iron-Macbook-Decal-Apple-sticker/dp/B00686RXDW

Also worth considering. In the Avengers, Tony Stark is "The Biggest Name In Clean Power" or some shitty line like that.. Unless he's planning on building one big ass Arc Reactor to power the planet, he would have to have a distributed model. That eludes to multiple Arc Reactors.. so he's not going to be able to keep their technology tooo quiet.

Finally - Stark clearly permitted the DoD to have War Machine - look what happened in the first move when he didn't approve of where his technology was going..

[–]gigabyte202724 0 points1 point ago

Yes but can siri do this... Jarvis, yip yip.

[–]WARGLBARGL -1 points0 points ago

anti movie verse, hipster-ism.....rising. must not. bitch on internet.

[–]IHATE_R_ATHEISM -2 points-1 points ago

You think Tony Stark gives a fuck about patent law??

[–]sargent254 -2 points-1 points ago

Wrong name bro

[–]IHATE_R_ATHEISM -1 points0 points ago

wrong name? I don't get it.

[–]sargent254 0 points1 point ago

I hate R Atheism, that won't go well

[–]IHATE_R_ATHEISM -1 points0 points ago

....ok.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]achshar 1 point2 points ago

Jarvis is a guy.