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all 72 comments

[–]golfer_ninja 89 points90 points ago

I feel like this should be on 90% of products.

[–]ExtraCheesed_Buddha 30 points31 points ago

Why not 99%?

[–]Shardwing 36 points37 points ago

No love for the 1%?

[–]ExtraCheesed_Buddha 12 points13 points ago

Have to keep a buffer zone separating it from 100%

[–]lisabadcat 1 point2 points ago

Self preservation.

[–]Cayou 25 points26 points ago

Hijacking the top comment for a PSA: when a sign says X is not responsible for Y, this doesn't necessarily make it true. If you sleep in a hotel where a sign says "management is not responsible for items stolen from rooms", this does not magically mean they can steal your shit without being sued. Otherwise, every business owner would have a sign up saying "we are not responsible for anything that happens here", and every manufacturer would make a sticker saying "we are not responsible for anything involving this product".

tl;dr: signs like this are either a) for purposes of humour, as is the case here, or b) meant to discourage lawsuits from people who don't know their rights.

[–]Xadev 10 points11 points ago

Same with shit falling off of trucks that have signs on them claiming that they are not responsible. They are.

[–]coolzero20 9 points10 points ago

I learned the truth of this from my father. I thought he was wasting his time when he took the local car wash to small claims for ripping off his mirror during the auto wash. I'm sure everyone is familiar with those signs that say they are not responsible for damage to your vehicle. Turns out they are.

[–]distopiandoormatt 5 points6 points ago

Yep, you can't choke on custard.

[–]albrano 2 points3 points ago

I beg to differ, that shit is disgusting.

[–]distopiandoormatt 8 points9 points ago

Choking and retching are different though.

[–]calufrax85 0 points1 point ago

You didn't seem to complain while chocking on my custard-covered hot dog.

[–]BSMitchell -1 points0 points ago

And thus the next state fair food was born. Sit down deep fried butter you has-been.

[–]Sariel007 0 points1 point ago

You can drown in it though.

[–]TracyMorganFreeman 0 points1 point ago

You can drown in virtually anything.

[–]Sariel007 1 point2 points ago

You can drown in almost anything.

FTFY

Game set and match.

[–]TracyMorganFreeman 0 points1 point ago

Is that really very different than what I said?

[–]vpookie -4 points-3 points ago

[–]GT5Canuck 3 points4 points ago

Or God's will, if you swing that way.

[–]kojak343 -1 points0 points ago

I have to agree with you. It is clearly God's will that the consumer choked on a hot dog and died this particular day.

Again, management can take the same position and win any suit brought against the establishment that sold the hot dog in the first place.

But the plaintiff could call God as a witness. (hmmm, would God have to swear on the Bible to tell the truth?) If God says, "Nope, it wasn't me", then management would be in trouble.

[–]LDiabolo 5 points6 points ago

[–]l8ralligator 9 points10 points ago

[–]AustinTreeLover 2 points3 points ago

I think hot dogs have gotten a bad rap regarding being a choking hazard. I think this started with parents cutting up hot dogs into little circles for small children. Perfect size and shape to choke your average toddler to death. However, if you chew the hot dog or if you cut it lengthwise first, not a choking hazard (I mean, more than any other food).

Just a little side note. Still funny. Carry on.

[–]TomServoHere 2 points3 points ago

In defense of those parents - toddlers are very fricking annoying.

[–]Joco151515 1 point2 points ago

I didn't know parents cut them into circles. Everyone I know cuts them lengthwise for their kids. Also, an adult friend of mine got a hot dog stuck in his throat once. A doctor had to remove it.

[–]AustinTreeLover 0 points1 point ago

I'm 40 years old, so the cutting them lengthwise thing may be commonly known by now, but when my kid was little, hot dogs were considered a big no-no. It wasn't until later that we realized why and that it could be easily corrected.

Yikes, I'm sorry your friend had that problem. Jeez.

[–]fail_girl -1 points0 points ago

Aw, well I guess that means I'm fucked :(

[–]Josh_Thompson 1 point2 points ago

This reminds me of this old couple I experienced while eating with my wife. The old lady starts to choke, I mean hard choke, like shes going to die on that piece of lamb or whatever. I see her making the grasping her throat motion, I run over to her and ask would you like me to help you? I'm about to go to it, heimlich style, her husband stops me. He says don't you dare I've been waiting decades for that old bitch to die. I turn around and head back to my table, its not until my wife yells "fucking help her" that I went back. An ambulance still came and the whole time until we left that old man just glared at me. Old people, sometimes, seriously.

[–]Defender 1 point2 points ago

You ruined his retirement plan.

[–]miichaelmchugh 0 points1 point ago

this actually happened to one of my friends uncles..

[–]Pazda -1 points0 points ago

I fucking love science.

[–]IlikeJG 0 points1 point ago

Why is there a mostly empty bottle of moisturizer there?

[–]reble02 -1 points0 points ago

Same goes for a pretzel, I'm looking at you Mr.President.

[–]Kevlaru 0 points1 point ago

The hand sanitizer kinda ruins the beauty.

[–]mecrosis 0 points1 point ago

We need these for everything everywhere.

[–]crshirley58 0 points1 point ago

My great aunt choked to death on a hot dog :(

[–]geo601 0 points1 point ago

If you choke reddit to death with reposts, that is the natural flow of thinks, and the mods are not responsible. Thanks

[–]robak69 0 points1 point ago

all these signs suck. just because there is a sign saying they aren't responsible doesn't mean that they can't be responsible.

[–]mlynbaum 1 point2 points ago

I was expecting a Field of Dreams reference for some reason.

[–]psytrancedsquid 1 point2 points ago

Natural selection: Without hotdogs we would all still be swimming around as bacteria in a primordial soup.

[–]LordofPterosaurs 0 points1 point ago

who invited the scientist ?!?

[–]Anaract 0 points1 point ago

riggity-riggity-repoooost

[–]Spiro_Agnew -1 points0 points ago

If you suffocate on poison gas, that is natural selection and Germany is not responsible. Danke

[–]n3rvousninja -2 points-1 points ago

Downvote for the repost you unoriginal karmawhore

[–]LDiabolo 6 points7 points ago

Sometimes reposts are necessary since not everyone is on reddit 24/7 and there are new users. I have not seen it before.

[–]n3rvousninja -2 points-1 points ago

No, they're unnecessary because you are taking credit for someone else's find while there is always new amusing content to post instead. By doing this everybody would get a laugh and the op wouldn't be stealing the fake and worthless Internet points from other original posters who also care about fake and worthless Internet points.

[–]ThatMetalBrony666 1 point2 points ago

He's not taking credit for someone else's find, he's posting a picture on Reddit. Did it ever occur to you that maybe people don't search the whole of Reddit just to make sure someone hasn't posted the same picture before them?

[–]jumpinjahosafa 0 points1 point ago

So if the internet points are worthless, why do you care so much? Downvote and move on.

[–]n3rvousninja -1 points0 points ago

Cuz I like seeing new material and if we encourage this behavior it's just going to get worse

[–]PlayingWithCum -2 points-1 points ago

Natural Selection.

[–]Viperbunny -2 points-1 points ago

I love this sign!

[–]CremDeLaCrem 0 points1 point ago

Darwin Award

[–]Mralexhartniss -2 points-1 points ago

survival of the smarter. what can you say? and never eat a hot dog in one bite...

[–]Sariel007 -2 points-1 points ago

Common sense... I'm bringing it back.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]ydonchablome -2 points-1 points ago

Why is this relevant to r/funny?

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]ydonchablome 2 points3 points ago

No need to obviously repost.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]ydonchablome 7 points8 points ago

I'm not trolling. I'm just pointing out that you are reposting something that was on reddit yesterday. YOU HAVE DIRTY KARMA SIR.

[–]remjb7 -3 points-2 points ago

I think the sign should say "survival of the fittest," which then leads to natural selection, no?

[–]Purdy14 3 points4 points ago

Survival of the fittest isn't always true. There are many ways to thrive in nature, like intelligence, protection, camouflage, survival by numbers, etc.

The phrase "natural selection" means being able to survive long enough to breed and pass on your genes.

[–]YouListening 2 points3 points ago

Survival of the fittest means survival is a trait earned by the species most apt for reproduction. This means that mating rituals and wits are part of fitness.

[–]Purdy14 0 points1 point ago

I think the phrase has lost a lot of meaning now, with human interference.

It seems that survival of the cutest or most useful has become a large factor.

[–]YouListening 0 points1 point ago

With humans, yes, but it's still a viable factor within species and in nature as a whole.

[–]Mrcopolo199 2 points3 points ago

By "fittest" it means the most fit for the environment.

[–]remjb7 0 points1 point ago

Fittest doesn't just mean strongest. It can also entail intelligence, etc.

[–]jefah 0 points1 point ago

Fit people don't eat hot dogs. His sign is far deeper than he thinks.

[–]TemptationsPage -1 points0 points ago

It's all fun and games until someone chokes on a hot dog.

[–]ccjx -1 points0 points ago

Maybe it's just me, but since the hotdog is made by a human, shouldn't it be "artificial selection"?

[–]schlebb 2 points3 points ago

No, the point being that if you choose to consume, and as a direct result choke on the hotdog, that person did so willingly. It has nothing to do with the artificialness of the hotdog, it's about bad things happening to people who are incapable.

[–]mad_gardener -5 points-4 points ago

As a creationist, I cordially disagree.

PS. Rabble rabble rabble rabble rabble....

[–]Ramboshin 4 points5 points ago

Ignorance, ignorrance, ignorance, ignorance

[–]tristan3 -3 points-2 points ago

if i choke to death on a hamburger is management responsible then