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top 200 commentsshow all 263

[–]HotcakesUnited 230 points231 points ago

Rookie of the Year 2: Henry Rowengartner's Return to Glory

[–]Funky_Butt_Lovin 23 points24 points ago

Indeed.

[–]bozzwtf 8 points9 points ago

This is a thing... isn't it.

[–]Akuzed 1 point2 points ago

Is this a question, or a statement?

[–]bozzwtf 1 point2 points ago

A rhetorical question, but I used a period for tone. Because the Internet. Thanks for being that guy though! :)

[–]Akuzed 0 points1 point ago

Wasn't trying to be "that guy" I was genuinely curious :)

[–]Jmc1077[S] 140 points141 points ago

Funky buttloving.

[–]HotcakesUnited 77 points78 points ago

Did he say "Funky buttloving"?

[–]dandollar 40 points41 points ago

Razenburger! You're in!

[–]Wonspur 42 points43 points ago

Gardenhoser!

[–]dadon41 14 points15 points ago

I'm looking for Henry Rulenfurter.

[–]treadmikeway 16 points17 points ago

You just gotta remember the haveto!

[–]throw_away_your_TV 20 points21 points ago

Give him the cheese! The high, stinky, chedddaarrr!

[–]snapshot_memory 1 point2 points ago

that's what he says? I thought it was "hattitude"

[–]soxfan2522 8 points9 points ago

Ravenboozer!

[–]trillreaper 2 points3 points ago

Runamucker!

[–]thechapattack 13 points14 points ago

The key to being a big league pitcher is the 3 R's: readiness, recuperation, and conditioning!

[–]Stevenutz 23 points24 points ago

Hot Ice! I heat up the ice cubes, it's the best of both worlds!!

[–]ajgator7 7 points8 points ago

I haven't seen the ol' floater pitch since Scuffy McGee!

[–]Fender6187 5 points6 points ago

Want to feel old? That movie came out in '93 when Thomas Ian Nicolas was 13 years old. If he were a professional baseball player today, he could be only 5 years away from retirement. Average retirement age for pitchers being 37-41 years old.

[–]Freakazette 2 points3 points ago

That movie came out in '93.

That was 19 years ago and I was eagerly awaiting being 10 because all kids want to be a double digit age. Holy shit, I'm old.

[–]DrFreyyer 4 points5 points ago

I was born that year.

[–]Freakazette 2 points3 points ago

Well, now, I just got one foot in the grave.

[–]funkypenquin 6 points7 points ago

Please remove your foot, I am trying to rest here.

[–]Freakazette 0 points1 point ago

Oh! My bad. I thought that was my grave. Funkypenguin, Freakazette... my eyes are going bad in my old age and they all look the same.

[–]Fender6187 0 points1 point ago

yeah you are. i was 6. XD

[–]Freakazette 0 points1 point ago

My youngest brother was almost 7, so wow, you're younger than everyone in my immediate family. That makes me feel older.

[–]Fender6187 0 points1 point ago

It's okay. Don't feel bad brother. The ladies love a silver fox. ;)

[–]Freakazette 0 points1 point ago

I am a lady.

[–]Fender6187 1 point2 points ago

ahh. Exactly why we should have profile pictures. Well then, in that case, I'll bet you're still bangin' ;)

[–]Freakazette 1 point2 points ago

Thank you.

[–]lafshdctid 6 points7 points ago

Throw em' the high, stinky cheese!

[–]lafshdctid 3 points4 points ago

Throw em' the high, stinky cheese!

[–]GanjaGamer69 0 points1 point ago

I also remember that movie. Now where's my fucking karma.

Edit: Meant to be the caboose of this karma train.

[–]RBeck 40 points41 points ago

Well did he make the out at 3rd or not?!?

[–]gopudge 79 points80 points ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExigcDtXWzQ Same kid. He's a legend in Texas. Here is a good article about him. He did the Thriller last week. http://news.yahoo.com/texas-rangers-fan-gaining-national-attention-fan-view-234300452--mlb.html

[–]DrHookEmMD 48 points49 points ago

"Legend" may be pushing it. Most of us refer to him as that annoying fat kid who goes after all the HR balls too early. You're supposed to wait for it to land in Green's Hill, but that never stops this fucker.

[–]dbzmah 19 points20 points ago

I don't hate him. Let the kid jump the gun, especially the other teams homer because he always throws it back. Also, I think he's gotten thinner from all the soonering. But definitely not a legend.

[–]BobPlager 0 points1 point ago

Pretty awesome to me; the fact that he just chucked it back into the infield as opposed to keeping it, and just walked back to his seat is hilarious to me.

[–]Phallics 13 points14 points ago

Here in Milwaukee there is a ball vulture that has some sort of record. We always call him "That one douche that brings his glove to the game."

[–]gopudge 1 point2 points ago

Basically every time I ever mention him I start with, "you know that fat kid that catches all the home runs in center field?" so people know who I'm talking about. Most do.

[–]BurntJoint 1 point2 points ago

I have no idea about baseball etiquette, but is what this guy is doing wrong? i thought once its over the fence, thats it...

[–]comicsansibar -1 points0 points ago

Its fair game. But usually we wait for it to land and then everyone rushes. Most of the people who go for the ball are teenagers and kids but there have been the asshole adults who will run through the kids to get it.

[–]iamthehabs 3 points4 points ago

That was a very boring interview.. well the answers at least.

[–]a424d5760ab83a7b1a0e 42 points43 points ago

Halfman! Halfman!

[–]xeqache 17 points18 points ago

How do you remember your username?

[–]manbrasucks 14 points15 points ago

[–]dave_casa 8 points9 points ago

It's the first half of a md5 hash of FUCK.

[–]whatwereyouthinking 8 points9 points ago

How the a424d5760ab83a7b1a0eCK did you figure that out?

[–]dave_casa 16 points17 points ago

I made shit up.

[–]Dukelicious 5 points6 points ago

Well it's a fact now. Source.

[–]hollingsworthless 3 points4 points ago

I keep clicking on the links to get to the original source but some prick keeps sending me to comment thread after comment thread! I WANT THE TRUTH!

[–]FCSFCS 0 points1 point ago

Today I finally figured out how the internet works.

[–]84b906030d48527ce05c 3 points4 points ago

No, it's not.

[–]whatwereyouthinking 1 point2 points ago

It's the first half of an md5 hash of FUCK

[–]smdepot 0 points1 point ago

ALL CAPS... cruise control for awesome. :)

[–]Mephisto6 33 points34 points ago

[–]The51stState 4 points5 points ago

This scene always annoyed me, how the hell did he not get injured???? The entire room blew up in a ball of flame and the windows blew out... HUH?!

[–]fizziebob 37 points38 points ago

He was not in danger

He was THE danger

[–]your_penis 23 points24 points ago

Jesus Christ Marie

[–]ForumWarrior 3 points4 points ago

not to mention that a bag filled with crystals of fulminated mercury that large would have detonated on its own while putting them into the bag itself. Unless each shard was individually secured, he wouldn't have been able to even place that many into the bag without it blowing.

[–]Snapples 6 points7 points ago

not to mention the explosion of the first one would have set off the whole bag...

[–]Mephisto6 5 points6 points ago

Maybe the rest were just dummies. Tuco doesn't know that you can't fill a whole bag with that shit, and Walt didn't want to blow himself anyway.

[–]hopeidontrunoutofspa 1 point2 points ago

Tuco opened the bag and took that one out so unless he somehow knew exactly which crystal Tuco would pick, it's unlikely that the rest were dummies. Also, how the fuck did he know Tuco wasn't just going to try and crush it immediately?

[–]Mephisto6 1 point2 points ago

Wouldn't it be even better if Tuco crushed it? Walt would have been further away from the explosion.

[–]MrNewking 14 points15 points ago

[–]Mephisto6 2 points3 points ago

:O

[–]MrNewking 4 points5 points ago

:O ← ← ← ←<------8

FTFY

[–]JazzyNips 4 points5 points ago

fuck off i opened that at work

[–]AlphaCunt 6 points7 points ago

It's just an arrow.

[–]MyNameCouldntBeAsLon 3 points4 points ago

I shouldn't have opened this at work.

[–]wobble0189 0 points1 point ago

source..please? :>

[–]TronCorleone 6 points7 points ago

This is better than the original post

[–]Nullvoid123 2 points3 points ago

Thank you stranger :) I try my best

[–]BisonST 1 point2 points ago

Why does he hop so much while waiting for the victim to fall?

[–]Delicious_Duck 20 points21 points ago

Do you still work at that place where you pooped with the door open?

[–]Jmc1077[S] 30 points31 points ago

I do. One doesn't just quit a job because of crippling embarrassment.

[–]JediMstrMyk 5 points6 points ago

"God's work...blah blah..."

[–]Tanooki003 1 point2 points ago

Sorry man, I had to do it. I tagged you in RES as "poop-guy"

[–]Jmc1077[S] 2 points3 points ago

Unfamiliar. What is RES?

[–]I_dont_feel_tardy 5 points6 points ago

Surely you jest! Everyone knows about Reddit Enhancement Suite

[–]chris782[!] 2 points3 points ago

It will revolutionize the way you waste time on the internet.

[–]Jmc1077[S] 2 points3 points ago

Sadly, I've not been a part of 'everyone' and had no idea until now. Thanks.

[–]barnacleeater 1 point2 points ago

[–]Jmc1077[S] 0 points1 point ago

Thanks.

[–]NeoXY -1 points0 points ago

I've now tagged you as Poop-with-door-open-guy

[–]randomneckbeard 0 points1 point ago

has anyone said anything yet? or are you in the clear?

[–]C_T_C_C 0 points1 point ago

Our stalls at school lack doors... guys poop in them all the time regardless.

[–]Epershand 3 points4 points ago

Does anyone else see the contrail coming off that ball when he throws it?

[–]TheAftermathh 3 points4 points ago

wheres this vid?

[–]kn9m 27 points28 points ago

That's how i feel when people post stupid cat pictures. Everyone knows what a cat looks like and no one cares what yours looks like.

[–]kn9m 1 point2 points ago

YUP that's what a cat looks like

[–]jvardrake 4 points5 points ago

A brother-in-arms!

I actually go so far as to use RES to tag every single person shitting up /r/pics and /r/funny with mundane (I make exceptions for ones that are actually funny, but those are few and far between) cat pics as "shits up /r/pics with mundane cat pics". If I see that person show up again, they get marked as "shits up /r/pics with mundane cat pics (REPEAT OFFENDER), and ignored.

I will stand with you to the end, my brother. To the very end...

[–]SgtFourleaf 7 points8 points ago

if you could only export this list of perpetrators... Gotham would be a safer place.

seriously i'd buy it from you

[–]jvardrake 2 points3 points ago

RES must store this data somewhere. Let me do some looking around...

[–]jvardrake 2 points3 points ago

The User Tagger module doesn't seem to have an export function, and I have (as of yet) been unable to figure out where it is storing its data on my machine.

I found this, but the data doesn't seem to be where it is supposed to be.

I don't have any more time to look at this right now, but I will try again later.

edit: I can't figure it out. If someone comes up with a solution, let me know.

[–]EdwardRoivas 0 points1 point ago

I only post my stupid cat pics to r/catpictures. Am I still hated?

[–]jvardrake 2 points3 points ago

No.

Also, please don't think that I only have it out for the cat pic people. I have tags for people who put political/atheist stuff everywhere, the "it's my right to pirate everything (so I don't have to pay for it)!!!" people, those that shit up r/gaming with non-stop pictures of junk with the Aperture logo on it, etc...

My list is quite extensive.

[–]sufrt -1 points0 points ago

go outside

[–]kn9m 1 point2 points ago

Thank baby Jesus.......thought I was alone on this one......How do they ever get upvoted?

[–]alphanovember 0 points1 point ago

There are many of us. We should form a downvote guild and raid the /new queue.

[–]mindctrlpankak 1 point2 points ago

fuck you STARE AT MY CAT

[–]Originholder 1 point2 points ago

Haha I was at that game

[–]bkbenftw 24 points25 points ago

i was the ball

[–]jpd118 3 points4 points ago

I'm a native Texan and go to Rangers games often. That kid is always there to catch the good home runs and throw back the others. It's true determination.

[–]hackhix 4 points5 points ago

GO RAYS!

[–]Fliff42 0 points1 point ago

I'm getting that feel right now.

[–]suddenlypenguins 2 points3 points ago

I am the only one that has no idea what's going on here? Why is there a big green wall in the middle of the sports field?

[–]mikeferrier 3 points4 points ago

It's the Batter's Eye

[–]suddenlypenguins 0 points1 point ago

Ah hah! Thank you!

[–]bojiggidy 3 points4 points ago

That's dead center field at the Ballpark in Arlington, where the Texas Ranger's play. It's in the middle of a series of bleacher seats in the stands, called 'Homerun Porch.' Because the visiting team hit a homerun in the Rangers' ballpark, and that guy (a Rangers fan) caught it, he threw it back.

[–]reptomin 0 points1 point ago

Yes, but why?

[–]bojiggidy 1 point2 points ago

It's just tradition. The wrong team hits a homerun in your ballpark, you'd rather give it back than keep it as a souvenir.

[–]CountArchibald 4 points5 points ago

I've watched nearly every Ranger game the last few years, (baseball is awesome. You just don't understand maaaaaan) and that same kid has caught about 30-50 homerun balls. He is ridiculously awesome.

Edit- His name is Trent Williams and he is still awesome. http://www.wfaa.com/sports/baseball/rangers/The-story-behind-the-Greenes-Hill-Kid-162128915.html

[–]RJBrown113 13 points14 points ago

He's caught 12.

[–]CountArchibald 4 points5 points ago

50 or 12 what's the difference :).

And it was almost 13 yesterday, as one Beltre's homers bounced back into the field right in front of him.

Edit: Fuck you reddit I was making a joke. My math skills are only slightly awful.

[–]Jmc1077[S] 17 points18 points ago

what's the difference

38.

[–]dave_casa 6 points7 points ago

I'm a scientist, this checks out.

[–]dbzmah -1 points0 points ago

He did it again last week, so at least 13 now.

[–]_swag_ 3 points4 points ago

Yeah you are right. His name is Trent Williams, and I hate to burst your bubble, but I used to play hockey with him for a while, and he is a douche

[–]Scuzzzy -1 points0 points ago

I've watched nearly every Ranger game the last few years, (baseball is awesome. You just don't understand maaaaaan)

Lemme guess, right around the time the Rangers stopped being the Rangers and started going to World Series'?

[–]selfloathingbychanel 2 points3 points ago

What actually happens if this occurs during a game?

[–]Guppywily 20 points21 points ago

It's a home run. The bases are cleared.

What did you think would happen?

Fans throw balls back onto the field all the time. NBD

[–]niperwiper 2 points3 points ago

Irrelevant question, but one that's always bugged me. Can an outfielder exit the field entirely to make a catch?

For instance, case one, ball hit very long and high, outfielder climbs the fence completely, enters first or second row of stands, and catches ball. Is that allowed?

Case two, outfielder is enjoying some popcorn in rows five and six with the fans, out of the field already, and a ball is hit to him, he catches it and throws it back in.

I'm guessing case one is allowed, but case two isn't because he's out of play before the ball is in play.

[–]1ARM 4 points5 points ago

If I remember correctly, part of the players body must be inside the playing field to count it as a fair catch.

[–]thisnotanagram 3 points4 points ago

I think the rule is that if it was a pretty-to-really sweet catch they have to give it to you. Decently sweet? Ump's call.

[–]whatwereyouthinking 0 points1 point ago

how is he in rows five AND six?

[–]rabaltera 2 points3 points ago

Prince Fielder became a RF

[–]GravyMcBiscuits -1 points0 points ago

No. The outfielder cannot go out of play to catch the ball. It would be considered a homerun. Same if he caught it on the fence and fell over the back of the fence. It would be a homerun.

edit: The fielder has to get his feet back down in the field of play before it is considered "not a homerun". Same goes for foul balls. You can't dive into the crowd to catch an out-of-play foul ball.

edit2: Appears I'm mostly wrong. ah well.

[–]jazzinacan[!] 4 points5 points ago

I think as long as your momentum carries you out of play the catch will still count, but you can't climb into the stands, stand there and catch a ball.

[–]Guppywily 0 points1 point ago

Derek Jeter was totally in the bleachers when he caught an out of play foul ball. He got the out.

[–]Jmc1077[S] 0 points1 point ago

He caught the ball in play though.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28NjeVnoORc

[–]Guppywily 0 points1 point ago

Oops.

I only saw the highlight on ESPN after it happened, and my memory is notoriously fuzzy.

[–]MichaelArnold -1 points0 points ago

the fuck? he hits the ball to the right, and it goes all the way to the left?

[–]josolsen 0 points1 point ago

Never seen a curve ball?

[–]MichaelArnold 0 points1 point ago

I have, but that looks like superman threw a curveball. Insane amount of top spin.

[–]GravyMcBiscuits 0 points1 point ago

What's even more amazing to me is that anyone in their right mind would consider it a good idea to have a less-than-waist-high fence in left field.

[–]Nab_Mctackle 6 points7 points ago

Its meant as an insult or jeer at the visiting team who hit a homerun, it has no actual effect on the game.

[–]brygy24 4 points5 points ago

The farther he throws the ball back the more runs the team that hit it to him has deducted.

[–]jimmysgotjive 2 points3 points ago

It's still a homerun...

[–]JaKKeD 1 point2 points ago

Get that man a contract.

[–]23bshorty 0 points1 point ago

Possibly better than The Dumpster

[–]katzilla9 1 point2 points ago

The Dempster?

[–]23bshorty 0 points1 point ago

Being a Cubs fan, we call him The Dumpster. His pitching is garbage.

[–]tagrav 1 point2 points ago

I wonder if he made the cutoff man.

[–]Robsalberghi 0 points1 point ago

DAMN! That dudes got an arm!

[–]LocalMadman 1 point2 points ago

I see this and I hear "Get that outta here" from NBA Jam.

/nostalgia

[–]dbzmah 1 point2 points ago

I was at this game, so glad we let CJ Wilson go. On a side note, that kid is at every game it seems. I've personally seen him do 3 catch and throwbacks.

[–]afewdollarsmore 0 points1 point ago

"Cats smell!"

[–]Hatesauce 1 point2 points ago

I don't get it? Is this referring to the fact that down-voting a front page item is futile?

[–]neanderthalman 2 points3 points ago

Yes. It's a symbolic gesture of disdain for the other team, or the case of reddit, disdain for the asshat with a stolen repost of a cat picture he found on facebook or 9gag.

[–]Hatesauce 0 points1 point ago

makes perfect sense now.

[–]DoctorGodfrey 1 point2 points ago

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

I have no clue about baseball, so this question is for all you baseball fans out there. Would this still count as a home run? Why/why not?

[–]Jmc1077[S] 0 points1 point ago

This is being discussed elsewhere in the comments. The answer is yes.

[–]tbross319[!] 1 point2 points ago

I was at this game, and it was as awesome in person as it is now in .gif

[–]iliveinacave 1 point2 points ago

Ahh! The out of boundaries area represents the frontpage! And the ball represents an incoming post being quickly rejected by the redditor represented by the catcher! Its a metaphor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[–]SunAndCigarrets 1 point2 points ago

Would I sound stupidy if I asked what did that guy do?

He appears to come fom the middle of the crowd, is he a spectator that took part in the game? Or his actons had no effect in the overall result?

[–]Jmc1077[S] 3 points4 points ago

That grassy patch he ran out on is not part of the field of play. He caught a homerun ball and threw it back out of disdain because his team did not hit it.

[–]SunAndCigarrets 1 point2 points ago

Oh, so the homerun wasn't affected by his catch and trow?

[–]Jmc1077[S] 2 points3 points ago

No. He is a fan who caught a homerun ball. He just threw it back.

[–]bfk94 0 points1 point ago

Upvote for baseball.

[–]andrelegacy 0 points1 point ago

Like a boss.

[–]break_me_down 0 points1 point ago

EverybodyWatchOutWeGotABadassOverHere.jpg

[–]Ocdrummer7271 -1 points0 points ago

TEXAS!!!!

[–]jorge22s -1 points0 points ago

What happens in that case?. Does it count as home run anyway?.

[–]WatNxt 0 points1 point ago

As a european, I don't know much about baseball. What is happening here? Is the ball out of bounds but a substitute caught it?

[–]Niccus 1 point2 points ago

Not that anyone cares, but I was at that game. I am now mildly amused.

[–]austin111 0 points1 point ago

How we play baseball here in Texas

[–]heatproofmatt 0 points1 point ago

Ok baseball people I have a question. Does the home run still count? Im not a baseball person.

[–]C_T_C_C 0 points1 point ago

Yuhh... Rangers

[–]Tonytarium 1 point2 points ago

There is a thing here at the rangers stadium, that when the opposing team makes a homerun you throw the tainted devil ball back.

[–]Aerophonics 0 points1 point ago

... I was at that game 0_0

[–]deafflow 0 points1 point ago

Fat kid in centerfield! Love that guy. Go Rangers

[–]ColeBot -1 points0 points ago

And he got the guy tagging up from second!

[–]GrayGhost63 0 points1 point ago

Was that a homerun or an out?

[–]bigfluffyhair 0 points1 point ago

Was at that game, it was hilarious.

[–]dflick 3 points4 points ago

GO RANGERS!!!

[–]AlphaCunt -1 points0 points ago

I don't understand how the title fits.

[–]FlatBot 1 point2 points ago

Nice - are there any links with more info / backstory on this fan-play? This seems like something that would at least have a small article on ESPN or something.

[–]No_Warhawkz 1 point2 points ago

Rangers!

[–]jberryman 2 points3 points ago

Keep doing god's work

[–]slaminsammy -4 points-3 points ago

Go Rays!

[–]keyree 0 points1 point ago

DM;WS