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all 148 comments

[–]Meersbrook 7 points8 points ago

Newcastle uses Dollars?

[–]beergoggles69 5 points6 points ago

Yep, Newcastle uses dollars.

[–]Stanjoly2 2 points3 points ago

[–]tylerwatt12 2 points3 points ago

no, this one

[–]milesd37 2 points3 points ago

Not this then?

[–]razorirr -2 points-1 points ago

that took longer then expected.

[–]milesd37 0 points1 point ago

fashionably late... well... late, i'm not to fashionable...

[–]MightySasquatch 2 points3 points ago

If there's something worse than dying it's being poor

[–]Roragok 90 points91 points ago

op i think you should call the bluff

[–]bpat 125 points126 points ago

It's true, how would they know it hurt the whole time? Definitely a bluff. Do it, man. It'll be awesome.

[–]Wrinklestiltskin 36 points37 points ago

I tried searching that in the AppStore. It doesn't exist... :(

[–]LordOfGummies 23 points24 points ago

I did the same damn thing. Wanted it so bad.

[–]TearHugger 32 points33 points ago

[–]GroupDrink 1 point2 points ago

username

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Found it. Was under the name of Ankle Pads

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points ago

[–]brygy24 14 points15 points ago

And if it doesn't hurt the whole time you're dying, guess what you get to rub it in. Wait..

[–]DukeOfGeek 3 points4 points ago

Once while caving a buddy stopped me from falling into a pit full of breakdown that was invisible from my position. After we got home I pulled out the Hero games basic rule book and began to roll dice against a 10 body normal (that's me) falling 35 feet onto rocks. (clickty-clack) Dead (clickty-clack) really dead (clickty-clack) crippled for life (clickty-clack) badly injured (clickty-clack) dead again... No no buddy, beer's on me, really.

[–]youbead 1 point2 points ago

Upvote for hero system

[–]Whyareyoufollowingme 5 points6 points ago

I know this is just a joke and I get it, but I just wanna take a nerdy moment to say that this app would be impossible to make. You'd need two cameras mounted in parallel to determine distance by triangulation, or an IR laser and receiver.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Whyareyoufollowingme 3 points4 points ago

But the program required to use this would have to be unnecessarily complex, and probably end up costing more than, say, a laser and receiver that attaches through the phone's sync port. Or maybe just a laser which is picked up by the sensors in the camera, if it can see that spectrum.

[–]Pokemon_Name_Rater 5 points6 points ago

Why the fuck are you guys discussing this on reddit instead of CODING/BUILDING/SHIPPING THE THING?!

[–]Deathalicious 2 points3 points ago

Because Objective C.

Here is how you trim a string in Objective C.

NSString *string = @" this text has spaces before and after ";
NSString *trimmedString = [string stringByTrimmingCharactersInSet:
                              [NSCharacterSet whitespaceCharacterSet]];

Eugh.

[–]Whyareyoufollowingme 1 point2 points ago

Because while I understand how to make it work in theory, I don't know enough about coding to make it work.

[–]Pokemon_Name_Rater 1 point2 points ago

Crowdsource a codemonkey.

CROWDSOURCE!!!

Man, I think I drank way too much coffee at that business seminar.

[–]aussy16 0 points1 point ago

That's what I say about building a time machine.

[–]glevally 1 point2 points ago

Or a nion flux transmitter.

[–]lumalisa 1 point2 points ago

Make it man, it'll be awesome.

[–]NonaSuomi 1 point2 points ago

Curious, but what if the camera had an autofocus system? Couldn't you somehow try to approximate range based on the difference in focus between the foreground and the floor?

[–]nikniuq -1 points0 points ago

You could try but it is a logarithmic relationship so the difference between say 3 metres and infinity is very small (see this image).

Also phone cams seem pretty crap at it anyway.

[–]wzdd 0 points1 point ago

You could cheat in cool ways though. 1. GPSes give elevation as well, the two problems being you'd have to figure out the elevation of the ground as well (could probably just make an assumption that it was the next-lowest thing you'd been moving about on in the general area of the GPS) and that GPS elevations aren't very accurate. 2. You could look for features of known size in the photo, such as bricks, and use the size to infer distance (you could even use the accelerometer to correct for perspective distortion). 3. You could actually attempt to use sonar: have the phone make a beeping noise and then turn on the microphone and measure the time it takes to come back. You might need to get the user to cup their hands around the mic and point the improvised dish at the ground, to ensure that interference from other objects doesn't screw things up too much. One thing you could do to improve this is have the user hold the phone up high, and then lower down: two measurements differing in a distance of 1 meter would help to identify which reflected sound was coming from the ground below and which was coming from other objects (such as surrounding walls).

I'm available for consulting at reasonable rates ;)

[–]wolfmann 6 points7 points ago

I wouldn't... Wade Steffey

[–]atlasdependent 0 points1 point ago

I find it disturbing that he was in there for 2 months before being found.

[–]ExtraCheesed_Buddha 2 points3 points ago

Play by play while touching it, so you can tell us if it actually hurts the whole time or not

[–]TheChrisRich 13 points14 points ago

[–]NO_TOUCHING__lol 2 points3 points ago

I'm glad I'm not the only one who immediately thought of this. Quite a catchy song.

[–]conrthomas 2 points3 points ago

WHEN WE TOUCH

WHEN WE KISS

[–]babys3alclubber 11 points12 points ago

When ever I see the word danger, I always hear Steve Irwin's voice

[–]lord_nougat 5 points6 points ago

Crikey, 'es a beauty!

poke poke

[–]haiku_robot 13 points14 points ago

When ever I see 
the word danger, I always 
hear Steve Irwin's voice 

[–]ccrazool -1 points0 points ago

No

[–]A_Stoned_Smurf 2 points3 points ago

I always think of Lost In Space and the robot, "Danger! Danger, Will Robinson, danger!"

[–]Samueul 5 points6 points ago

and some idiot will still touch it.

[–]SEGnosis 47 points48 points ago

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
not a good time 184coms 1724pts 3mos funny
Warning label...like a boss. 173coms 1388pts 9mos funny
I know a few things that need this warning. 2coms 8pts 4dys pics

source: karmadecay

[–]LostSoles 85 points86 points ago

[–]aza9999 10 points11 points ago

Was that eric?

[–]gmangw 0 points1 point ago

If you think of him as eric, drop what you're doing and watch Generation Kill.

[–]aza9999 1 point2 points ago

Looking it up now...seems like it could be good

[–]Tezdoll 22 points23 points ago

[–]The_cynical_panther 7 points8 points ago

Muh-buh-splosions!!!!!!!!!

[–]A_Stoned_Smurf 2 points3 points ago

The fuck? Why are you being downvoted? That made me chuckle slightly, and was completely relevant...

[–]Tezdoll 0 points1 point ago

I don't know, nor care. I don't come here for karma. Thanks for the comment though.

[–]WK_of_Angmar 0 points1 point ago

That's from The Incredibles, if anyone wants to know.

[–]razz0rt 3 points4 points ago

These upvote-downvote gifs always make me laugh.

[–]sacredcowkiller 0 points1 point ago

Awesome!

[–]JUST_LOGGED_IN 1 point2 points ago

What movie is this from?

[–]DiversityOfThoughts 1 point2 points ago

If I'm not mistaken, it's from Battleships. Looks like similar CGI effects.

[–]MedievalManagement 1 point2 points ago

Battleshit. It was laughably bad.

[–]dsac 0 points1 point ago

that link is already purple for me

ಠ_ಠ

[–]overused-meme-alert 0 points1 point ago

like a boss

BWEEP bip bip BWEEP

[–]daybreaker -1 points0 points ago

TIL, wait 3 months, repost to /r/funny not r/pics, reap karma

[–]JustHereToDerp -3 points-2 points ago

I haven't seen this in a whole month! What a miracle.

[–]learntofart 2 points3 points ago

[–]AreWhyAyeEhn 1 point2 points ago

I call bullshit

[–]NPH_wouldnt_do_that 2 points3 points ago

Thanks GLaDOS

[–]Lillipout 2 points3 points ago

Well, now I HAVE to touch it.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]HogBacon 0 points1 point ago

God would probably ring the police, you'd be constantly knocking on heaven's door and disappearing.

[–]papa_seeps 1 point2 points ago

this warning is begging to be challenged

[–]storesvin 0 points1 point ago

Lana?

[–]shrugalicious 0 points1 point ago

Being eaten alive would hurt worse.

[–]doyduhdoh 0 points1 point ago

The details are important.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

this belongs in r/nignogpantyhog

[–]flesh_crayon -1 points0 points ago

Older than the internet.

[–]HighEmirates 0 points1 point ago

These are the kinds of signs i need to see to actually believe in the danger

[–]rytis 1 point2 points ago

must... not... touch...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Boy do I feel sorry for the guy who had to install the sign.

[–]dulocrazy 1 point2 points ago

Cool repost

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

RIP Frank Grimes

[–]THE_GR8_MIKE 0 points1 point ago

Who tested it?

[–]nemodad 0 points1 point ago

[–]SirRonaldofBurgundy 0 points1 point ago

This hurts me every time it gets posted.

[–]pbrooks19 -1 points0 points ago

See, now, I believe that sign.

[–]rmalik007 -1 points0 points ago

That definetly gets the point across

[–]ICouldBeTheChosenOne 0 points1 point ago

Ever heard the expression don't put your dick in crazy? This is the rest of that warning.

[–]CuppyMcCake 0 points1 point ago

This reminds me of an area near one of the entrance's to the Perimeter Mall. There is like a cage around the area and a loud electrical buzzing and warning signs lol! I don't like that entrance hahaha!

[–]jimmyx18 0 points1 point ago

I AM THE DANGER.

[–]EntingFantastic 0 points1 point ago

LOL BREAKING BAD IS COOL

[–]nerd_with_no_fedora 0 points1 point ago

Hmmm... Wheres that gif of that guy being vaporized by an electrical arc? Yeah, that prob didn't hurt. Well not for long at least.

[–]Italian_Barrel_Roll 0 points1 point ago

Meh, electric shock isn't really pain, it just resembles it in the same way something really cold feels hot.

[–]Klamour 0 points1 point ago

I'd like this as a tattoo slightly above my anus. Only slightly.

[–]timkobayashi 0 points1 point ago

Must resist making puns

[–]bmbyal 0 points1 point ago

I wouldn't be able to resist.

[–]TheDudeFromOther 0 points1 point ago

Bah! Prove it...

[–]jburns_655321 0 points1 point ago

[–]stefan_89 1 point2 points ago

For those who are curious why, wires electrified with alternating current will entrap a victim who would accidently touch it (You would lose control, but there isn't sufficient voltage to push you away) - wires with direct current will either kill or electrify a victim.

[–]stargazingskydiver 0 points1 point ago

How did they put the sign there? I guess one guy had to sacrifice himself so no one else would get hurt.

[–]Jventure 0 points1 point ago

Pics or it didn't happen.

[–]Dolentrean 0 points1 point ago

Well... they convinced me.

[–]Flupsel 0 points1 point ago

I am drunk and this is not even funny

[–]alkoid 0 points1 point ago

I demand a new notice stating "this will kill you if you put your hand here" along with a count of the number of people that actually have done so after it was posted.

[–]darklooshkin 0 points1 point ago

How did they find out? And how many research assistants did it take to necessitate the sign?

[–]KatherineMcGrath 0 points1 point ago

Did they spell "Authorized" wrong?

[–]WK_of_Angmar 1 point2 points ago

No, it's in British English.

[–]markkar -1 points0 points ago

They misspelled "Authorized"

[–]WK_of_Angmar 1 point2 points ago

It's correct in England (British English).

[–]BigBrandon70 0 points1 point ago

A challenge for /r/firstworldanarchists

[–]Johngoodmansanus 0 points1 point ago

Fresh cantaloupe

[–]Bashasaurus 0 points1 point ago

Far better and legit http://imgur.com/XgDzG

[–]Rosco09 0 points1 point ago

You will feel a tingling sensation, followed by death. Please hold still while your life is extracted.

[–]Lenwe1 0 points1 point ago

HIGH VOLTAGE!

[–]brandilion 0 points1 point ago

From working in retail I can say people don't read signs. I am going to put this up by a piece of equipment to see how long until someone notices.

[–]dunkdaddy 0 points1 point ago

They should really have that written in brail, too.

[–]GeorgeForemanGrillz 0 points1 point ago

You'd probably die from cardiac arrest before you could feel much of the pain.

[–]AliasUndercover 0 points1 point ago

I have this as the wallpaper on my phone...

[–]rubiksman333 0 points1 point ago

This is one of my wallpapers.

[–]Superduperscooper 0 points1 point ago

i had this as my ipod touch lock screen for awhile.

[–]equlix 0 points1 point ago

I need this as a shirt. right meow.

[–]smartGuy156 0 points1 point ago

Relevant xkcd

[–]nottimminchin 0 points1 point ago

"DANGER WILL ROBINSON, DANGER"

[–]FancyNuggets -1 points0 points ago

Okay…that sounds nice.

[–]piar 1 point2 points ago

They should use a sign like this in Portal 3.

[–]ugluck95 0 points1 point ago

Woah! where was this taken? I saw the same warning label on the servers in the Corning facility in NY. It looked just like that.

[–]iconography853 0 points1 point ago

1776.

[–]Kulhu 0 points1 point ago

I AM THE DANGER.

[–]ZeDocktor 0 points1 point ago

Stand the fuck back, I got this.

[–]Mr_McStretchy 0 points1 point ago

No pain, no gain.

[–]SQUID_FUCKER -1 points0 points ago

I wish my ex came with one of these.

[–]Jeyk3 -2 points-1 points ago

It'll also cause you to spell "authorized" wrong.

[–]aza9999 0 points1 point ago

Made me think of my favourite warning sign

ACHTUNG!
ALLES TURISTEN UND NONTEKNISCHEN LOOKENPEEPERS!
DAS KOMPUTERMASCHINE IST NICHT FÜR DER GEFINGERPOKEN UND MITTENGRABEN! 
ODERWISE IST EASY TO SCHNAPPEN DER SPRINGENWERK, BLOWENFUSEN UND POPPENCORKEN MIT SPITZENSPARKSEN.
IST NICHT FÜR GEWERKEN BEI DUMMKOPFEN. 
DER RUBBERNECKEN SIGHTSEEREN KEEPEN DAS COTTONPICKEN HÄNDER IN DAS POCKETS MUSS.
ZO RELAXEN UND WATSCHEN DER BLINKENLICHTEN. 

EDIT: Formatting

[–]RockVegas -4 points-3 points ago

That's not how you spell "authorized".

[–]iheartbakon 3 points4 points ago

It is in England - you know, the home of the English language?

Flavour! Colour! Parlour! Harbour!

Take that, bloody yank.

[–]bewareofdware 0 points1 point ago

1776

[–]RockVegas 0 points1 point ago

That's this jingo jango all about?

[–]5k1895 0 points1 point ago

I apologize for my ignorant fellow Americans. I really don't know how they miss this stuff...

[–]iheartbakon -1 points0 points ago

I think it's caused by centeroftheuniversitis.

[–]_xiphiaz 0 points1 point ago

centreoftheuniversitis*

[–]iheartbakon 0 points1 point ago

touché