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all 154 comments

[–]jmathrockthepath 155 points156 points ago

I think this is the cutest I've ever seen Danny Trejo look.

[–]ExtraCheesed_Buddha 62 points63 points ago

I don't think I've ever seen him smile

[–]Candies1205 37 points38 points ago

He smiles a lot outside of his movie roles! I've never seen him look quite so cheesy before, though. He's adorable!

[–]Cormo 9 points10 points ago

Breaking Bad, he's smiling while talking about his profit.

[–]mocotazo 8 points9 points ago

Danny Trejo "Champion" Documentary Trailer

Some smiles here. Champion is a great documentary, it was refreshing to see just how much good Danny Trejo does for the community.

[–]Yoyo8 5 points6 points ago

It's not the same without the blood stains.

[–]pork_a_pine_princess 2 points3 points ago

[–]TijuanaTacoMonster 9 points10 points ago

My dad looks like Trejo, sans tattoos- dad is bigger, meaner

[–]cyborgdingo 10 points11 points ago

I bet you were a very well-behaved child...

[–]TijuanaTacoMonster 5 points6 points ago

He never put a hand on me- he let my mom do that

[–]jglee1236 1 point2 points ago

Because with mom, you'd only get knocked out. If it came to dad hitting ya, we wouldn't know the redditor we know today and he knew this. Good man.

[–]partycentralsupplies 4 points5 points ago

That bird looks tasty.

http://i.imgur.com/RXEPb.png

[–]AverageGiraffe 2 points3 points ago

Dem eyes.

[–]olafthebent 27 points28 points ago

Tyson actually does know a bit about pigeons and doves

[–]IMASHIRT 5 points6 points ago

He was an outcast growing up in inner city New York, and made friends with the pigeons around town. The first fight he got into was after some kid was picking on him and rung one of the pigeons' necks.

[–]C_T_C_C 1 point2 points ago

At first I thought this was my friend Herschel Walker...

[–]thetoxicmonarch -3 points-2 points ago

Like how to punch them in the beak.

[–]slawre89 5 points6 points ago

Like how to flip them to send messages about police activity

[–]myusernameismud 111 points112 points ago

[–]HymenAnnihilator 55 points56 points ago

Exacly; did you see his standup at the Charlie Sheen roast? He butchered the English language like his first wife, but he was funny as shit.

[–]vertigo1083 54 points55 points ago

Best line in the roast:

"How much blow does Charlie Sheen do?"

"Enough to kill Two and a Half Men."

[–]Patricko96 29 points30 points ago

Or when Steve-o got Mike to punch him in the face and Seth McFarlane said "So that's what it looks like when an asshole gets fisted."

[–]ManBearPig92 14 points15 points ago

You mean when Steve-o ran full speed into Mike Tyson's fist?

[–]Patricko96 3 points4 points ago

[–]Karwano 2 points3 points ago

link please :D <3

[–]020120 1 point2 points ago

[–]Azartic 2 points3 points ago

Bitches please.

[–]greenyellowbird 10 points11 points ago

He was so nervous during his stand up, which kinda made it sad to watch. But, as a heckler...he was pretty damn funny.

[–]silenti 0 points1 point ago

I stayed for the Homer joke at MacFarlane but the rest was too painful to watch.

[–]myusernameismud -2 points-1 points ago

Yeah. It was so scripted but that made it so bad it was hilarious.

[–]cuntniggerflyingjets 20 points21 points ago

Of course it was scripted, do you think stand-up comedians come up with their material on stage?

[–]Exano 2 points3 points ago

Afaik the non comedians that attend the roast dont come up with their own material, which makes it feel scripted. The ones that use their own stuff have more of a natural flow

[–]cuntniggerflyingjets 6 points7 points ago

Did you see The Situation at Donald Trump's roast. Nobody can convince me an actual comedian came up with that.

[–]yosoymilk5 3 points4 points ago

In the writer's defense, The Situation just had really shitty comedic timing.

[–]SEEENRULEZ 1 point2 points ago

This is what I WAS expecting.

[–]Entheist 78 points79 points ago

Its funny because Tyson has a speech impediment

[–]jcmc2112 53 points54 points ago

It's okay to make fun of him because he can kick any of our asses.

[–]TijuanaTacoMonster 6 points7 points ago

not mine

[–]ofarrizzle 33 points34 points ago

If you physically possess an ass, I'm willing to bet hard currency that he can kick it.

[–]TijuanaTacoMonster 6 points7 points ago

Fuck it- somebody give Mike a call- LET'S DO THIS

[–]ryosen 0 points1 point ago

[–]eXX0n 11 points12 points ago

I don't belive a Taco Monster from Tijuana actually have an ass.

[–]blackholedreams 7 points8 points ago

It's Mike Tyson, he'd just take a bite out of it.

[–]TheBusinessMan7 4 points5 points ago

Nice try Evander Holyfield.

[–]ActuallyChuckLiddell 0 points1 point ago

Not me, bro.

[–]steepleton -1 points0 points ago

and he's a rapist

[–]Hotrootsoup 0 points1 point ago

If I recall, the girl had previously accused a man of rape, and the court found that man innocent. Not saying it's impossible, but there's a chance she's just a lying bitch.

[–]steepleton 0 points1 point ago

the court was also prevented from hearing testimony concerning tyson's previous troubling behavior towards women, so it's quite possible he was a lying little bitch

[–]Hotrootsoup 0 points1 point ago

Maybe. I would have no trouble believing either truth. He wasn't entirely stable, and she had lied before. Who knows who was lying.

[–]JaTinkles 15 points16 points ago

For the amount of education and parenting the man had, hes actually extremely smart. He has a very good vocabulary.

[–]Godtiermasturbator 9 points10 points ago

I thought the self-narrated Tyson documentary was excellent.

[–]shomer_fuckn_shabbos 19 points20 points ago

Mike Tyson as Vargo Hoat. I think we have to make this happen.

[–]nickelforapickle 2 points3 points ago

...great minds think alike, my friend.

[–]shomer_fuckn_shabbos 4 points5 points ago

Yield Lannither! Or I thall hit you with a tithanthic righth hook!

[–]levune 4 points5 points ago

Thaphireth!

[–]erryday_IAm_rustling 11 points12 points ago

[–]drtoothpick 1 point2 points ago

That is the funniest thing I have seen on the internet today. Thank you.

[–]xorn 0 points1 point ago

Where's his giant face wart?

[–]titaniumpanda95 67 points68 points ago

Hey, that was a really creative title! It totally didn't give away the punchline at all. Good job!

[–]edgarwilliamfrye 10 points11 points ago

Welcome to Reddit; where the title is the punchline.

[–]JPannullo 1 point2 points ago

and the content doesn't matter

[–]Armed_To_The_Teets 22 points23 points ago

Tortuga!!!!

[–]daveyboy9 4 points5 points ago

I take my time but I always win

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Qwertybob 2 points3 points ago

C'mon, spoiler man

[–]megusta_tortugas 3 points4 points ago

I like those.

[–]DevinTheGreatish -1 points0 points ago

...*gustan...

[–]megusta_tortugas 1 point2 points ago

As a mexican I am not too proud about that mistake.

[–]JadeXY 1 point2 points ago

Hola DEA!

[–]Stregano 5 points6 points ago

"Damnit, can somebody tell Mike and Danny to stop catching the birds! We are trying to shoot a John Woo movie here"

[–]Rountree85 11 points12 points ago

I don't know why people think this isn't important, but "DON'T PUT THE FREAKING PUNCHLINE IN THE TITLE!"

[–]doodlebutter 1 point2 points ago

It's tortuga!!!

[–]fluffy402 0 points1 point ago

I thought it was that guy from Black Ops Zombies?

[–]Starklet 5 points6 points ago

See how the title you've posted is identical to the punch line? Yeah you can't do that again.

[–]buildingwithclay 12 points13 points ago

Thith weally makes me appropriate Mike Tython and underthtand why we put him up on a pedicure.

[–]seconddealer 3 points4 points ago

Pedestal*?

[–]frobischer 12 points13 points ago

"I am not a pedethtal! I'm not even attracted to thildren!"

[–]buildingwithclay 0 points1 point ago

Yes. And also, appreciate*

That was the point. He has a history of misusing words.

[–]Revanx17 -1 points0 points ago

[–]seconddealer -1 points0 points ago

Not really since pedestal pronounced with a lisp isn't pedicure.

Edit: I stand corrected, apparently he misuses words too.

[–]buildingwithclay 0 points1 point ago

It's not about just the lisp with him. Parodies of Tyson included the misuse of words.

[–]Revanx17 0 points1 point ago

neither is appreciate, but that's in there too.

it's all part of the joke.

[–]bigmeetchlarryhoover 2 points3 points ago

[–]PercyChuggs 0 points1 point ago

I thought this was going to be Sylvester The Cat related. Disappointed.

[–]murderofcrows6 0 points1 point ago

now kith

[–]thedeejus 2 points3 points ago

Thanks for putting the punchline in the title so I could read it twice, thus doubling its hilarity!

[–]nix0n 0 points1 point ago

I had some oral surgery done recently, which caused me to have a lisp for a little bit while I healed. My friend made me this.

[–]rahrahrar 2 points3 points ago

Fuck your punchline title

[–]mnch 1 point2 points ago

Is that Octavio from KOTH in real life?

[–]Thedirtygongon 1 point2 points ago

Yes.

[–]SpaceMantis 0 points1 point ago

Yes, minus the Rob Zombie tattoo.

[–]belladonnadiorama 0 points1 point ago

No, he plays Enrique. Mike Judge plays Octavio.

[–]bigoldirtydick 0 points1 point ago

mocking mike only makes him stronger

[–]stash0606 1 point2 points ago

I'm just expecting Danny Trejo to be murdered brutally now. what the hell is up with him dying in the most mutilated way possible in pretty much every role I've seen him lately, besides Machete?

[–]Zmodem[S] 2 points3 points ago

And The Devil's Rejects...

[–]GreenJesus423 2 points3 points ago

He made it through "Badass."

[–]joeldavis 0 points1 point ago

Harold and Kumar...

[–]lazenbooby 0 points1 point ago

I was half expecting something involving Sylvester from Looney tunes.

[–]Joeboe2302 1 point2 points ago

Tyson loves those birds

[–]alanlee222 0 points1 point ago

holy shit this is so great

[–]francescohaas 0 points1 point ago

didnt the native guy play in the 2007 halloween movie?

[–]opibat 1 point2 points ago

HEY, I want my burd!

[–]skinnedmink 0 points1 point ago

Can this guy join in too? http://i.imgur.com/Y8z5m.jpg

[–]Always_Taken 0 points1 point ago

Hola DEA

[–]Shaggyarab 1 point2 points ago

Those 2 together could kill everyone on Reddit.

[–]ViewSonik 0 points1 point ago

Mike is such a cool pigeon

[–]klobster 0 points1 point ago

Iunno is just one word.

[–]sh2248 0 points1 point ago

Thothe are thome cute birdth

[–]Nigerzard 0 points1 point ago

Now kith.

[–]okfornow 0 points1 point ago

Can't not use Mike Tyson's voice when saying this out loud.

[–]Revanx17 0 points1 point ago

Thufferin' Thuccotash!

[–]BananaBarber 0 points1 point ago

I thought he liked turtles better.

[–]dssdassw -1 points0 points ago

DO NOT PUT THE PUNCHLINE IN THE FUCKING TITLE. BID RED FUCKING LETTERS. But besides that it's good.

[–]Czarchitect 0 points1 point ago

PIZZA PTHURSDAY!

[–]wokcity 0 points1 point ago

CMON MIKEY. I TREATED U WELL MI-gargglglglegge

[–]emileogalileo 0 points1 point ago

Anything with mike tyson and his lisp is guaranteed to make me laugh

[–]TACOfarmerXD 0 points1 point ago

You leave me little recourse.

[–]GDarkwolf -3 points-2 points ago

Seems like I'll have to be that guy....

I don't get the joke.

[–]rollerpigeons -2 points-1 points ago

As a pigeon, I approve this post!

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]ThePixelPirate 3 points4 points ago

Yo....you mean to tell me this is a repost? PITCHFORK! WHERE IS MY GODDAMN PITCHFORK?

[–]Alese 0 points1 point ago

spread your cruel hatred!

[–]SoDangAgitated -2 points-1 points ago

This is a repost