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1371
1372

Douchebag level: Pug (imgur.com)

submitted ago by Be1Lan1

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[–]Blee10 113 points114 points ago

I was sitting here thinking "NO, NO, NO IT'S GONNA POOP" but somehow didn't stop looking. Sometimes it's good to be wrong.

[–]Spy9Krab 21 points22 points ago

So this is what Todd Akin meant about legitimate rape.

[–]PatrickLatham 2 points3 points ago

Zing!

[–]LandyValentine 3 points4 points ago

A Pugs Life

[–]aisner190 35 points36 points ago

He didn't choose the pug life, the pug life chose him.

[–]DickLikeAnAccentMark 65 points66 points ago

That face at the end..."Kill me."

[–]drunk_otter 71 points72 points ago

What a fuckhead

[–]TheMuffinMan98 26 points27 points ago

Otter, you are drunk.

[–]Fenris82 -1 points0 points ago

Such a mindfuck

[–]SupermanV2 49 points50 points ago

The casual way she did it seems super rapey. I need to go shower.

[–]GlassHouseResident 9 points10 points ago

She?

[–]SupermanV2 34 points35 points ago

Looks like a girl dog to me. Trust me they hump legs just as much as the boys do.

[–]KoreanTerran 27 points28 points ago

It's similar to how girls are just as horny as guys are.

The more you know.

[–]SupermanV2 5 points6 points ago

Arguably hornier.

[–]fucking_leverpostej 43 points44 points ago

But arguably not.

[–]bumblebeesscareme 16 points17 points ago

You've never worn slacks for yo' girl? Bitches go crazy for slacks.

[–]StankFish 0 points1 point ago

Dat Testosterone

[–]hazmat_suit_guy 0 points1 point ago

I think the girls hump more for dominance than anything.

[–]nuisible 1 point2 points ago

Dogs hump to show dominance, it doesn't necessarily have to do with sex.

[–]chronikfunk 12 points13 points ago

oh your face allow me to hump it for you,

[–]Cuznatch 0 points1 point ago

When staying at a friend's during a period of temporary dormitory displacement, I were up 5 times in 3 days to his dog having sex with my head. The living room didn't have a decent catch so I couldn't shut him out, and he seemed to break most of the barriers I placed in the way.

The third day I awoke to his penis on my ear, as he was coming at it from the side. Shit me right up every time.

TL;DR: Got ducked in the ear by a dog.

[–]scoots23 14 points15 points ago

He's got great form

[–]MbMn91 144 points145 points ago

Pugs are such gross little animals. When they're not sitting there making you wonder when the stroke is coming, they're constantly trying to eat poop. Now some dogs eat poop, whatever: pugs are OBSESSED with it. My friend's pug would follow the other dog around, wait for it to poop, then eat it while it was still fresh. Nasty fuckers.

[–]memeaddictedchick 86 points87 points ago

And here I just disliked their faces..

[–]bastard_thought 8 points9 points ago

And here I just disliked their feces..

[–]Sandi315 8 points9 points ago

Watch out for those head humpers, Gordon!

[–]memeaddictedchick 0 points1 point ago

That too..

[–]theharb 10 points11 points ago

Our pug has never attempted to eat poop ever, I think you just had a f'ed up pug.

[–]MbMn91 -1 points0 points ago

I would never have a pug, because they're awful little things.

[–]guitarpsycho182 31 points32 points ago

That's a pretty rash generalization. I have two pugs and they have NEVER eaten shit, at least to my knowledge. They are huge cuddle whores though.

[–]Qkombur 43 points44 points ago

at least to my knowledge.

Yeah.

[–]putin_my_ass 8 points9 points ago

To be fair, there isn't a dog out there which it's owner knows all of the shits that dog has eaten.

Dogs eat shit, each and every one of them.

[–]Ryguylv 1 point2 points ago

Fact: my dog has never eaten her shit. How do I know? I've been present for every one of her shits in my back yard. She doesn't even sniff it.

[–]putin_my_ass 1 point2 points ago

Dude, it's not her shits per se that you've got to worry about. Has your dog been in your sight for 100% of the time? You've never been caught up in a conversation with a fellow dog owner and lost sight of your dog for 2 minutes?

Trust me, your dog is not above eating shit, and he/she has already done so.

[–]Bryz_ 2 points3 points ago

They know how to operate when guitarpsycho182 isn't looking. Like the toys in Toy Story.

[–]BurntTheToast 0 points1 point ago

Yeah I would like to see Sid or the guy who owns the toys jizz on Jesse and watch her friends try to comfort her but she can't clean it off because the guy who owns her would notice.

[–]nixzero 27 points28 points ago

You took the words right out of my mouth!

My mom's old pug mix would always hump her beagle, and not only waited for him to poop but ate it AS IT WAS COMING OUT!!! We tried all sorts of treatment for the poop eating, but nothing worked. He always stunk, and if you gave him a bath he would spend the rest of the day rolling in dirt and his unscooped (read: fresh) feces.

Personality-wise, he was skittish as all hell, but still yipped at everything. Add the fact that he had shitty breath (literally), bad hips, and the apparently inevitable stroke... It's like they took all of the bad traits a dog could have and tossed them into a single breed.

On the plus side, I credit him for me knowing the word "Coprophagia".

[–]BlueMieux 26 points27 points ago

Soft serve.

[–]graymankin 2 points3 points ago

That is a horrifying pet.

[–]robert_ahnmeischaft 3 points4 points ago

You took the words turds right out of my mouth!

[–]nixzero 1 point2 points ago

I knew that opener would come back to haunt me...

[–]robert_ahnmeischaft 1 point2 points ago

Glad I could fulfill your low entirely accurate expectations of Reddit.

[–]thepensivepoet 0 points1 point ago

I learned coprophagia from Dirty Jobs when they were hanging out with the shit beetle people.

[–]bualsvilla 5 points6 points ago

Eating poop is a sign of lack of vitamins. That's just one of the problems pure breed dogs have.

[–]Noke100 8 points9 points ago

My pug has never eaten any poop.

[–]Pugs 2 points3 points ago

I owned multiple pugs and currently have one now. The statement you made about all pugs loving poop is completely untrue. The reason it was trying to eat poop is because it was lacking nutrients due to lack of poor nutrition. I give my pug Organix brand food which is a very healthy option, along with carrots and omega-3 fish oil capsule supplements.

However my pug is obsessed with pee, but what dog isn't? I can confirm that they love to cuddle and watch TV.

[–]emptytissuebox 13 points14 points ago

As a pug owner, I can confirm this is untrue.

[–]thebigboy155 4 points5 points ago

I have chugs (chiuauaua/pug mix) and i can say mine don't eat poop too, just smell it.

[–]msk105 2 points3 points ago

And, I've never seen a dog who farted as much as a pug I once knew. But they're still pretty adorable.

[–]moogoesthecat 4 points5 points ago

The farting is due to the structure of their face; pugs, in particular, end up consuming/swallowing too much air because of it, causing farts. This is similar to how humans tend to start with the consummation of air for 'automatic fart tricks' - except pugs do it passively.

[–]Iheartpugs 1 point2 points ago

My pug doesn't eat poop, he just has to poop on something above ground, like a rock

[–]NfgGenocide 0 points1 point ago

I feel bad for my grandpa owning two pugs, and allowing them to lick his face and occasionally letting them lick his mouth as a "kiss"...

[–]martellus 0 points1 point ago

My friend's pug would follow the other dog around, wait for it to poop, then eat it while it was still fresh. Nasty fuckers.

Our neighbor has a lab that does that. One day after some workers had done some yard work in the backyard she came back with a face full of a different kind of shit...

[–]mortaine 1 point2 points ago

My sister has a pug, and my niece loves pugs (and yet, does nothing to actually take care of the one they have). They are horrid, horrid little beasts.

Me, sitting at her house trying to telecommute.

Me: "Jesus f'ing Christ, do you need something, or can you be silent for five minutes while I make a phone call?"

Pug: "snort snort snort snort snort snort snort snort snort snort snort...."

Ugh. Horrid little things.

[–]1992ad 0 points1 point ago

The pug I used to have would eat all the goat turds he could find. We had two goats. They poop A LOT.

[–]keitarofujiwara 7 points8 points ago

Mindfuck.

[–]p1415926 7 points8 points ago

Facerape.

[–]skudrafan1 5 points6 points ago

Headsex.

[–]NfgGenocide 1 point2 points ago

A dog humping another dogs forehead.

[–]purrrfect 6 points7 points ago

A fuck given and not given at the same time. This will go down in the history books.

[–]ceemikeytee 5 points6 points ago

What's it called when you teabag without testicles?

[–]Athene_Wins 12 points13 points ago

Clam rub

[–]WheresTheWasabi 7 points8 points ago

Clam Slam?

[–]imnotracist_nigrah 1 point2 points ago

idk why but i lost it on this one

[–]emperorpotatoketchup 1 point2 points ago

lucky?

[–]DoctorAlzheimers 15 points16 points ago

Little Bitch Level: Black Lab

[–]ratajewie 4 points5 points ago

He's been to prison. He's used to it. Oh boy that sounds racist.

[–]galaxyforsza 5 points6 points ago

What can you say? He really wanted some head.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

Title level: 9fag.

[–]ManOfQuality 5 points6 points ago

This is actually a replay of my last CoD game.

[–]AmmoPanda 6 points7 points ago

That probably feels awsome.

[–]bumblebeesscareme 25 points26 points ago

No. Do not rub your genitals on your dog's head.

[–]AmmoPanda 8 points9 points ago

But think about your balls on a fuzzy surfac.

[–]Mcflexington 11 points12 points ago

brb skinning puppies so I can rub my balls on their fur without it being bestiality

[–]Jump_My_Juicy 11 points12 points ago

See? Where there's a will, there's usually an extreme measure that can be taken in order to justify a disturbing action.

[–]AmmoPanda 0 points1 point ago

I know its horrible to rub your balls on a puppy. But come on guys, you know...

[–]superatheist95 3 points4 points ago

stick a brush handle up its ass instead.

[–]myballsgotmilk 1 point2 points ago

It's not cheating if you spread peanut butter on your balls and let your dog lick it off. Because it's your dog. You know, because it's YOUR dog, get it?

[–]ak22801 2 points3 points ago

We all know that one friend....

[–]saywhat181 2 points3 points ago

Pugs are vile little creatures.

[–]Beefers268 1 point2 points ago

As a pug owner, i approve of this

[–]MrClownyBubbles 0 points1 point ago

I'd kick that nasty fucking dog like a football. No joke.

[–]Purpleowl123 0 points1 point ago

Pugs are awesome if you train them right! They just snort really loud.. And like to lick

[–]Smotpoker 1 point2 points ago

Let's breed an animal to live a life where they have trouble breathing just because we find them cute. Awesome!

[–]Purpleowl123 -2 points-1 points ago

They had a real reason to be bred before. The originated in China and they bred dogs that had wrinkly foreheads, (I don't think there is a special name for them) until the formed the pug because back then the wrinkles formed a Chinese character. I don't remember what it meant though. But now since more breeding the wrinkles are different and are now just cute little wrinkles. They aren't miserable like people are saying I have two very cute happy pugs at home.

[–]Smotpoker 1 point2 points ago

So they originally were bred purely for aesthetics, that is not a real reason. And this breeding fucked up their snout so a lot of them have breathing issues.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pug#Health_problems

Way too many health problems and way too much inbreeding. It's really sick to continue to breed them when you already know ahead of time they are susceptible to all these health problems. The whole point of breeding should be to get rid of genetic defects, not to make them worse.

Anybody that purchases these dogs from a breeder is a giant douchebag, hell anyone that purchases any dog from a breeder is a giant douchebag. Even if they were perfectly healthy, continuing to give breeders money is just saying "I'm ok with euthanizing millions of rescue dogs because I want this specific breed". It's sad and disgusting. I think breeding any animal for aesthetics should be outlawed.

[–]Purpleowl123 0 points1 point ago

I know, aesthetics are horrible but it doesn't just happen with pugs there is other breeds that have health problems. So your are trying to make me feel bad about getting dogs that have health problems like many other dogs?

[–]Smotpoker 0 points1 point ago

"Other breeds have problems too" isn't really much of an excuse. They shouldn't be bred either. Breeding could be working towards dogs with less health problems, but money is more important than the health of the animal evidently.

I don't have any answers on how to fix things, but until such a time as we aren't needing to kill millions of animals every year because they can't find homes, breeding for money needs some serious investigation.

If you have sheep and want a sheepdog that's a different story, but to breed something with so many defects just because it's cute is disgusting. The same can be said about Dachshunds and Rhodesian Ridgebacks and any number of other breeds with health problems that are subject to a lot of inbreeding.

I'm in favor of hunting, and eating meat, and fur coats, but we're talking millions of dogs and cats dying every year for nothing. It's senseless and our society should be advanced enough to put a stop to it.

Edit: Link 3-4 million euthanized per year. That is in the US only. Anyone who buys an animal from a breeder or a pet store is saying they are OK with this.

[–]Purpleowl123 1 point2 points ago

Ok your right, I love animals and I guess I didn't know that some of these things are happening.

[–]eleze -1 points0 points ago

hey, peta is -> that way i think you will fit in perfectly. Also heres a bucket of red paint for you too.

[–]Purpleowl123 0 points1 point ago

Ok?

[–]LazyHazy 1 point2 points ago

Shut up. This isn't witty, funny, or even in good humor. It has nothing to do with PETA. The point is, you shouldn't breed an animal purely for aesthetics, without caring about all the shitty health problems they're bound to be born with. It's arrogant.

[–]eleze -1 points0 points ago

LOLUMAD BRO?

[–]LazyHazy 2 points3 points ago

IM SO MIFFED, BRAH! Seriously though, you're a fuckwad. You shouldn't even be allowed to add comments.

[–]eleze -1 points0 points ago

my god ur so mad its making me hard

[–]overused-meme-alert 4 points5 points ago

Douchebag level: Pug

boop

[–]elias1jose 1 point2 points ago

That's how my dog wakes me up in the morning...

[–]decomposed-condoms 0 points1 point ago

I totally though the pug was going to shit on his face!

[–]frankyboy888 0 points1 point ago

Chika Chika pow wowww

[–]DalekCaek 1 point2 points ago

"Imma skullfuck that bitch!"

"Hope you don't mind hepatitis!"

[–]ViolentOctopus 0 points1 point ago

T-Bag, noob.

[–]BourbonKid 1 point2 points ago

Wait a second, gotta scatch my balls.

[–]missalissa15 0 points1 point ago

Nothing makes me cringe quite like dogs humping. I hate it.

[–]TyroneofAfrica 0 points1 point ago

People humping are just as bad.

[–]Momentarily 0 points1 point ago

Was anybody else just staring at his asshole, waiting for a little turd to pop out?

[–]jonaheim88 0 points1 point ago

that's how they assert dominance...right? tell me that dog just isnt fucking weird...

[–]thumbs27 0 points1 point ago

T-Bagging like a boss.

[–]Jump_My_Juicy 0 points1 point ago

Colby?

[–]Xenowar 0 points1 point ago

He was coding in brainfuck

[–]Frederic54 0 points1 point ago

It's to show the other dog he is dominating it.

[–]hooliganking 0 points1 point ago

That lab didn't give a single fuck. Literally.

[–]Ozymandias12 1 point2 points ago

0 fucks....

[–]QWOPtain 0 points1 point ago

"... Fuckin' pug."

[–]thecockofkarma 0 points1 point ago

They do this a lot too. Mine does it to my lab, however my lab has recently decided that enough is enough and started sitting on my pugs face and using it essentially as toilet paper. Pugs are little shits.

[–]pensivepedro 0 points1 point ago

Baby Cakes does not like the brain fucklers.

[–]Mansyn 0 points1 point ago

Why does this title format not irritate everyone else as much as it does me?

[–]putin_my_ass 0 points1 point ago

Tea-bagging his fellow mutt? Seems like a frat-boy pug.

[–]robert_ahnmeischaft 0 points1 point ago

Pug: "IMA GET ME SOME!" [hump hump hump]

[Pug walks away]

Lab: "Did you hear something?"

[–]robert_ahnmeischaft 0 points1 point ago

Relevant Maria Bamford bit.

[–]graymankin 0 points1 point ago

I feel like I just watched some really weird porn...

[–]Be1Lan1[S] -1 points0 points ago

i found this very difficult to fap to.. i managed though.

[–]MisogynistLesbian 0 points1 point ago

My pug used to wake me up by sitting on my chest and burping in my face.

[–]bricardo 0 points1 point ago

Dogs are always trying to hump each other.

[–]thjoki -1 points0 points ago

'i will have my revange...'

[–]flytaggart1 0 points1 point ago

Achievement unlocked: moon roof.

[–]SwagSwaggerson -1 points0 points ago

I love how the black dogs eyes open up at the end like "that MOTHERFUCKER"

[–]Piscator629 0 points1 point ago

I bet someday there will be an improvised neutering if that keeps up.

[–]raydeen 0 points1 point ago

Skullfuck. He almost had it right.

[–]The_GeoD 0 points1 point ago

My wife's French Bulldog does that to my PitBull

[–]votiv 0 points1 point ago

get a dog!!!

[–]anrynike 0 points1 point ago

hahahaha

[–]TaylerKay 0 points1 point ago

Even as a dog...wouldn't you move if someone was trying to fuck your forehead?

[–]CrazyNeon99 -1 points0 points ago

I wish this is what it looked like on halo when I t-bag a camping douche.

[–]Lexiluwho 0 points1 point ago

My female lab does this to the male lab....so not lady-like.

[–]LazyHazy 0 points1 point ago

I fucking hate pugs. They're the shittiest breed of dogs on the planet. I've been around a lot of them, and they're not all the same, but they universally shitty. I hate the face, I hate the bark, I hate the fact that (most) of them have gross health problems, and (most) of them are ridiculously unhygienic. If you're a pug owner, I'm sorry. I hate your dog. And I don't want to go to your house because of your dog. This is coming from someone who LOVES dogs. All types. Except pugs.

[–]BruceWaynesWorld -1 points0 points ago

Teabag level: Pug

[–]samcobra 0 points1 point ago

That's exactly the comment I came here to read. Have an upboat.

[–]Cory1750 0 points1 point ago

Sweet title faggot

[–]zephyy -3 points-2 points ago

Wow he fucked that bitch in her face. #RARE #BASED

[–]philtomato -3 points-2 points ago

Another way to get head I suppose.

[–]angelicone -4 points-3 points ago

/r/gifs

[–]Sokonomi -4 points-3 points ago

My brain!

[–]Mjhakes -2 points-1 points ago

ONE MILLION UPVOTES TO YOU GOOD SIR!

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