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How I now feel during my church's worship service after being a Redditor for 8 months. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Squezme

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[–]masris 18 points19 points ago

What speaking in tongues looks like now:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsn_OEgby_c

[–]Squezme[S] 17 points18 points ago

My church encourages this kind of behavior :((

[–]c_programmer 8 points9 points ago

Assemblies of God by chance? They'd actually take a section of worship and encourage being "filled with the holy spirit." I always wanted to reply, "What, like the Haitian Voodoo adherents?"

It's been about two months since my last church service and I couldn't be happier. I am seriously happier overall now that I'm not going.

[–]scorpionbb 4 points5 points ago

That's why I call Pentecostalism Christian Voodoo. I went to Catholic church from ages 1-13 and then my pops become a "born again" nutter and found a small hole-in-the-wall Pentecostal church to go to. The difference between services couldn't have been more drastic.

[–]Squezme[S] 2 points3 points ago

Actually, it was supposed to be an AoG but the building was too close to another AoG church. Ended up just being like an AoG with out an actual affiliation. Haha yesss exactly! Oh man, I am looking forward to that day. For now I'm content with making sly jokes to myself during the service :)

[–]Khrevv 1 point2 points ago

So you're like 10 years old and your parents still make you go?

[–]Squezme[S] 0 points1 point ago

17 you dumbfuck

[–]Khrevv 1 point2 points ago

So... You're 17 and your parents still make you go? Doesn't sound any better...

[–]mavriksfan11 2 points3 points ago

To be fair, Haitian voodoo is really cool.

[–]fnupvote89 3 points4 points ago

I know that feel bro. :(

I'm stuck in the same situation.

[–]Squezme[S] 2 points3 points ago

internet bro hugs

[–]fnupvote89 3 points4 points ago

internet bro hugs

[–]Bullshitting_you 3 points4 points ago

Comes up behind behind you during your internet bro hug and kisses you on the back of the neck

"shhhhh just go with it"

[–]duBiYou 3 points4 points ago

Sounds like something a priest would say to a young boy.....

[–]Erasus 0 points1 point ago

born in 1989? Move the fuck out

[–]scorpionbb 16 points17 points ago

Seen this shit in person at my Dad's pentecostal church. It is truly the most pathetic thing you can see with your own eyes that isn't outright criminal.

[–]kalarax 18 points19 points ago

I've always seen family and friends do this and I never could. As a young kid/teen I would always pretend to make random babbling noises so that I felt like I was as good a christian as they was.

I feel pathetic looking back on it.

[–]SmilinBob82 16 points17 points ago

Then you realize that most of the people in the church felt the same way at one point, but have convinced themselves that it's real.

[–]kalarax 11 points12 points ago

Yep. It eventually dawned on me. Still, I go at my parents demand because college and rent aren't really possible without their help right now.

Actually sitting in a worship service right now. People singing and crying. I don't fucking get it.

Edit: I missed this mornings message on homosexuality. God knows what they said. There's an online podcast though... Might listen and share if its rediculous enough.

[–]Nyanthrax 1 point2 points ago

Please do. I'd love/hate to hear it.

[–]Squezme[S] 9 points10 points ago

My church's pastor flipped over Obama backing gay marriage, I wanted to cry.

[–]kalarax 4 points5 points ago

They haven't uploaded it yet from the looks of it but I'll leave the link here just incase anyone in the future visits/checks back. It should be up by then.

http://www.3crosses.org/services/sunday-morning/sermons/3784-the-matter-of-homosexuality

let me grab my popcorn...

edit: seems it is up now as of 11am the following day

[–]mikerhoa 5 points6 points ago

This guy

[–]fnupvote89 1 point2 points ago

I wish you were correct. I really wish you do. Because that would mean they are saveable (haha, ironic). But, most of the fanatics, especially those who speak in tongues, believe it to the core. I was that way for a while until I went rogue and began to question things.

[–]Squezme[S] 0 points1 point ago

That's exactly how I was/am. I'm really glad that I gave up on being depressed of not being able to be a good christian that could speak in tongues and hear from God.

[–]scorpionbb 8 points9 points ago

As a young christian I started paying attention to all the people who spoke in tongues and I picked up specific patterns per individual. After years of hearing the same people mutter the same few gibberish phrases over and over it was painfully obvious that this was no "heavenly" language, or a language at all. Also standing in a prayer circle and falling down, man, they would circle me every Sunday and I never fell! Eventually they start to nudge you back so you can play your part and hit the floor but I wasn't buying it, even as a believer. In anthro 101 we watched a video about African shamans, these shamans were whipping themselves into a frenzy just like these spasming pentecostals and speaking a gibberish spirit language, and it just hit me like a ton of bricks how similar these behaviors were. I was in the process of deconversion at the time and cringing at tongue speakers definitely accelerated the process!

[–]kalarax 7 points8 points ago

School camps were the worst too. They would have like 5 hour prayer nights and everyone would be on the floor. I eventually was like fuck this, I just laid down and slept. The real kicker was this girl who claimed her vision was restored. Guess who was back in glasses Monday morning, yep... that same girl. Private Christian school was retarded.

[–]fnupvote89 1 point2 points ago

In anthro 101 we watched a video about African shamans, these shamans were whipping themselves into a frenzy just like these spasming pentecostals and speaking a gibberish spirit language, and it just hit me like a ton of bricks how similar these behaviors were.

This! This helped me see through my church's bullshit. It's easy to see how fake and full of garbage it is once you realize a completely isolated and unrelated religious group does it.

[–]herple_derpskin 5 points6 points ago

at least it gives people the ability to dance to dubstep

[–]shrikeman1 4 points5 points ago

Saw this a few days ago. Cracks me up every time. The scary part is I know people like this!

[–]johnsbury 0 points1 point ago

I think Mitt Romney is into this shit.

[–]Nyanthrax 4 points5 points ago

Wrong. He wears magical boxers.

[–]Nice_Dude 0 points1 point ago

I don't think Mormons are very charismatic in regards to worship

[–]panthuralexander 2 points3 points ago

They should all get sent to the bin.

[–]pingas 2 points3 points ago

They remind me of Sim characters.

[–]qpstrafe 2 points3 points ago

Is that church or a fucking mosh pit?

[–]Poxpoone 2 points3 points ago

Watching this makes me sick to my stomach. How can people be so fucking stupid?! I'm embarrassed being the same specie as them..

[–]wankd0rf 15 points16 points ago

I'm sorry but this is the fucking greatest gif I've ever seen

[–]mavriksfan11 9 points10 points ago

"Oh, white people."

[–]Crapaholic 8 points9 points ago

White people smh

[–]ThatCanuck 6 points7 points ago

I'm definitely picturing you in church now with that look on your face. It's awesome.

[–]mikerhoa 4 points5 points ago

Does Tosh get a nickel every time we see that kid now?

[–]NikkiDove 4 points5 points ago

Ya doubly for me. I was raised in a secular home, we never even mentioned religion or church, except to point out how useful it is for keeping people in line.

And today I went to an Evangelical church for the first time in my life. Awkward.

[–]shrikeman1 3 points4 points ago

Know that feel.

[–]Casexx 3 points4 points ago

http://youtu.be/Qjl54v1irbs?t=31s

[–]leoparduspardalis 2 points3 points ago

Look around for for people like yourself. I'm sure there's more in your church.

[–]redditgolfer 1 point2 points ago

Before anyone comments on how /r/atheism doesn't really provide "evidence" as much anymore as it just makes fun of religion --> thus how could OP really make an intelligent realization: take note.

The group effect of this place, be it silly and childish at times does bring a sensation of stark reality to anyone that goes to church regularly. To be honest, I still am a Christian; however, I have the atheists of reddit to thank for a lot of "WTF" thoughts running through my head when I'm at church. It's not necessarily the "oh, now I see there is no God" realizations you hear about on here, but there's a lot more critical thinking going on in my head when I hear a sermon or witness a worship service.

Less blind acceptance of what the people in church have to say on grey topics and a lot more referring to what is truly moral and just in (my) God's eyes. I think it's a good thing so long as I don't become a pretentious dick. Also that second to last statement probably sounds completely ridiculous to an atheist, but hey I didn't come here to suck your cocks, just share a viewpoint/opinion.

[–]Squezme[S] 0 points1 point ago

This needs to be seen.

[–]brilliantjoe 2 points3 points ago

My brother got married last Saturday at a Catholic church. It's scary how the brainwashing at a young age can still override ones attempt at NOT partaking in the mass. I found myself going through all of the motions without even really controlling it. Scary.

[–]f3nd3r88 1 point2 points ago

haha, same thing happened to me this past weekend. top notch.

[–]SirRonaldofBurgundy 1 point2 points ago

I just want to hug that little kid and tell him not to be scared, everything will be ok. The bad people won't hurt him.

[–]fritzing 1 point2 points ago

why don't you just stop going if you feel so out of place?

[–]rapinghorsemonkey 1 point2 points ago

This is why i converted to Kthuluism. Atleast when we dance we have a purpose.

[–]mirangerman -2 points-1 points ago

I've about felt that way about some churchs/religions way b4 I joined reddit!

[–]magnumdb 0 points1 point ago

Umm... is that from a free Tompkins Square Park rave? Cause if so...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=si-WKlvPplg

[–]arbitraryentry 0 points1 point ago

I'm a sympathizer, but these statements always bring this to mind.

Powerful...

[–]-Hastis- 1 point2 points ago

I was in a dance team at my church that was regularly dancing each Sunday on stage in the worship. You can imagine that as I started to doubt and see the flaws in everything, that my motivation for worshipping while dancing was dropping more and more... At some point they kicked me out of the team... I must had a terrible, depressed face on stage that day, haha...

[–]mrducky78 0 points1 point ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyJI9xDUYV8

You need screaming and chicken hands.

[–]issicus 0 points1 point ago

i feel that way right now, looking at this post...

[–]SoCo_cpp 0 points1 point ago

A redditor for 8 months would know better than to repost this tired shit.

title comnts points age /r/
My friend convinced me to be the designated driver at a rave 0coms 5pts 1dy funny
White people... 1com -1pt 21dys gifs
Me on r/trees as a person that doesn't smoke 12coms 400pts 21dys reactiongifs
white people... 97coms 754pts 2mos funny
When everyone gets the joke thats on the front page apart from me. 1com 26pts 15hrs funny
Went to a rave for the first time yesterday. 0coms 3pts 1mo gifs
How I feel in clubs 3coms 74pts 3mos funny
Browsing r/new... 5coms 143pts 3mos gifs
How I felt at my first NASCAR race 2coms 50pts 3mos gifs
How I feel browsing /r/funny 2coms 11pts 4mos pics
How I feel being a Christian on Reddit 24coms 29pts 4mos funny
Atheist living in the bible belt 40coms 692pts 4mos atheism
Pretty fly for a white guy? 1com 11pts 5mos GifSound
White People 193coms 631pts 5mos funny
How I Feel Whenever I Go To The Club With My White Friends 3coms 33pts 5mos gifs
how i felt when i was introduced to reddit 21coms 495pts 5mos gifs
o_O ... O_o 33coms 361pts 5mos funny
dam white people 40coms 853pts 5mos funny
Me at a club 10coms 523pts 5mos gifs
ಠ_ಠ 1com 21pts 5mos gifs
When I'm sober in a club 197coms 1368pts 1mo funny
How I feel when I see memes on facebook 23coms 604pts 5mos gifs

source: karmadecay

[–]billiarddaddy 0 points1 point ago

Exactly how I felt in church.

[–]LexiPSD -2 points-1 points ago

This. So, totally, amazingly, this.

[–]BattleChimp 0 points1 point ago

Do you just shit on your keyboard and hit save?

[–]SimilarImage -4 points-3 points ago

Age User Title Reddit Cmnt Points
2 weeks masculinecatfish Me on r/trees as a person that doesn't smoke /r/reactiongifs 12 400
2 months SeanutBrittle white people... /r/funny 97 754
3 months vastill Browsing r/new... /r/gifs 5 143

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