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all 91 comments

[–]SCUMDOG_MILLIONAIRE 47 points48 points ago

I was skeptical that watermelon existed in Christ's time and region, but it seems that early varieties of watermelon were cultivated as early as 200BC in the Nile Valley, and they are mentioned in early Israeli text. Although, the watermelon that existed back then was much smaller, had yellowish skin, very bitter seeds, and bitter tasting fruit... so it would most likely not "smell like watermelon".

[–]ableom 22 points23 points ago

I'm glad someone is checking the facts.

You should list your sources next time in case anyone tries to refute it.

[–]plantsaretheorigin 19 points20 points ago

Yeah. I, for instance, am incredulous. I'm pretty sure he's citing stuff pretty far out there in terms of biblical watermelon theory.

[–]TrollKy 29 points30 points ago

"And thy Lord said unto Judas 'gooby pls' and it was done." (Michael 9:18)

[–]guesswhostalkin 8 points9 points ago

Given the historical nature of watermelon that you have so articulated, it is entirely possible that 'watermelon' possessed negative sociological connotations, hence the term 'you smell liek watermelon' in the above illustration. Judas would have been mocking Jesus prior to his execution.

[–]caged_ape 1 point2 points ago

This is why i hate reddit sometimes

[–]ThEgg 13 points14 points ago

So Jesus did say something about gays.

[–]mukhtarman 64 points65 points ago

535 link karma and the comments are a fucking graveyard.

[–]ReversePeristalsis 55 points56 points ago

Hopefully it gets a Resurrection.

[–]Reigmame 34 points35 points ago

You may well be the saviour of this thread.

[–]KILLS_PUNS 40 points41 points ago

[–]ANAL_QUEEN 28 points29 points ago

Boy, you nailed that.

[–]Esc4p3 17 points18 points ago

You don't want to cross him.

[–]black19 1 point2 points ago

I'm just going to Passover this pun thread

[–]WolfInTheField 1 point2 points ago

Your work is futile.

[–]_catfacts 14 points15 points ago

Maybe on a Latter day

[–]splel_cechk_fwt 2 points3 points ago

Seriously, what the hell is going on in here.

[–]kihadat 0 points1 point ago

It's because the people that usually post on Jesus threads can't get a word in edgewise if Jesus isn't being a dick or we're not making fun of the people who worship him.

[–]yanquiUXO 63 points64 points ago

God damned punchline in the title

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[–]gregmax 3 points4 points ago

Hey bro have you seen that latest Condescending Wonka meme? It's so funny!

[–]bwever 28 points29 points ago

Judas plz

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points ago

Joobas plz

[–]tamakitty22 13 points14 points ago

Joobas pls

[–]SweetMojaveRain 13 points14 points ago

k

[–]Urist_McReddit 9 points10 points ago

Judas Prist

[–]lolslowking 1 point2 points ago

Okay what the hell is wrong with these comments? This is madness.

[–]supergai 10 points11 points ago

i always crack up at "stop judas, das gay"

har har har

[–]writ24 6 points7 points ago

don't get it.

[–]durtymessycan 2 points3 points ago

I was really expecting a black person joke ....highly disappointed

[–]black19 0 points1 point ago

Well, some people think god was black...that changes the context a bit right?

[–]CozyToes 1 point2 points ago

gooby please.

[–]MagicTrees 3 points4 points ago

Came here expecting to see a man able to smell watermelon fields. Left disappointed

[–]ChaosBozz 0 points1 point ago

jeezus pls

[–]benstillerfagget69 3 points4 points ago

Thank you Based God!

[–]BlitzSturm13 -2 points-1 points ago

Jesus's hair in this picture is fantastic. That's probably what smells like watermelon, look at that flow! It looks sooo soft!

[–]caged_ape 1 point2 points ago

You're kind of hilarious

[–]BlitzSturm13 1 point2 points ago

[–]ExtraDip 1 point2 points ago

And after that day, Judas swore he'd kill Jesus

[–]Crossthebreeze 0 points1 point ago

Can someone explain the joke to me. (I'm guessing it's a reference to something?)

[–]caged_ape 0 points1 point ago

It's just weird nonsense. No context needed, just weird funny shit

[–]BobSaget12345 0 points1 point ago

I read Judas lines with herberts(family guy) voice for some reason .

[–]chrismikehunt 0 points1 point ago

Came here looking for this image...

[–]Twitchifies 0 points1 point ago

Old but gold

[–]fuzzmine 0 points1 point ago

Outstanding.

[–]TARDISninja 0 points1 point ago

The audio makes it better. I can't link to it now, but someone else might.

[–]92camaro[!] 0 points1 point ago

Stop posting this picture you piece of shit.

[–]Igorattack 0 points1 point ago

[–]jersho 1 point2 points ago

I read what was on the picture, then saw OP's username, and read it as "Nope, Chuck Testa". It made me giggle quietly to myself.

[–]Im_not_a_racist_but 0 points1 point ago

ಠ_ಠ

[–]wrestlingspikes 0 points1 point ago

I GOT YOU FRIEND!

[–]kipumab -1 points0 points ago

Gooby pls

[–]Flyingbob -1 points0 points ago

gooby pls

[–]Catch22af -1 points0 points ago

Jesus is black.

[–]anonimyus -1 points0 points ago

gooby pls

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[–]leetheproducer -1 points0 points ago

fak u judas

[–]seahorseparty -5 points-4 points ago

Why is it that a lack of punctuation makes funny sentences/questions funnier?

[–]catatat -4 points-3 points ago

Go back to school already! This post is hideous.

[–]tocki -5 points-4 points ago

Watermelons are overrated imo. I prefer other types of melons.

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[–]RonWisely 5 points6 points ago

thatsracist.gif

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[–]mrpti 1 point2 points ago

sorry, but it really doesn't.