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all 95 comments

[–]The_Great_Kal 51 points52 points ago

"Cause of death?"

"Seems to be murder. Back to you."

[–]Terror_Baron 46 points47 points ago

"Who's the culprit?" "The murderer" "...The plot thickens"

[–]bronymobile 4 points5 points ago

Plot twist: it was suicide.

Directed by M. Night Shamylanylanylanylanylanylanylanylanylanylanylan

[–]Ragnalypse 46 points47 points ago

He was killed so hard, he died to death.

[–]Insideoutwards 8 points9 points ago

Actually literally in fact.

[–]ANAL_QUEEN 2 points3 points ago

But did he died?

[–]JoshsName 15 points16 points ago

My dad used to say he would kill me until I was dead. Looking back on that memory, that's kind of an odd thing to say.

[–]AATroop 14 points15 points ago

Did he ever go through with it?

[–]JoshsName 17 points18 points ago

I don't think he had the heart to kill me the whole way.

[–]swaglikemine 0 points1 point ago

I was looking for this post.

[–]Pxzib 9 points10 points ago

[–]emann43 2 points3 points ago

And I'm still alive, years before I die.

[–]Pxzib 0 points1 point ago

Really

[–]mems_account 0 points1 point ago

*days

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

Getting killed to death works every time. Except Jesus.

[–]kosuth 4 points5 points ago

Nah, he only got killed to undeath. Getting killed to death requires more killing :P

[–]Yuskei 3 points4 points ago

He's dead, murdered, and somebody's responsible.

[–]samredditflynn 1 point2 points ago

To shreds you say

[–]foggart 2 points3 points ago

How's his wife holding up?

[–]samredditflynn 1 point2 points ago

to shreds you say

[–]blacknbrown -3 points-2 points ago

likin the Futurama sir.

[–]PantsofJoy 12 points13 points ago

Did he die?

[–]ReverendHerby 10 points11 points ago

We'll have to watch to find out.

[–]PantsofJoy 8 points9 points ago

That's where they get you.

[–]TheInspirationalTurd 7 points8 points ago

Ehh screw it, I don't have that kind of attention span. I'll just look it up later

[–]00110110_00111001 3 points4 points ago

"man killed to death, and the murderer could be in your bedroom closet, more at 5."

[–]LittleTT 2 points3 points ago

"what common household items can kill your children to death? Tune in at 11:29"

[–]Jowgenz 3 points4 points ago

Killed five times before he hit the ground.

[–]Tactful 9 points10 points ago

"Content reposted to frontpage."

[–]Confuciussaywhat -1 points0 points ago

SO BARVE

[–]IDeSalvo 4 points5 points ago

OMG! CHARLOTTE?????

[–]thescottster 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, 5 or 6 months ago.

[–]IDeSalvo 0 points1 point ago

wow, karma whore...

[–]dbeta 1 point2 points ago

North Carolina is doing well on the front page today.

[–]OftenRhymes 0 points1 point ago

I'm quite sure I got this pic in an email. From my grandpa. In 2006.

[–]evanalmighty19 5 points6 points ago

repost...

[–]Wraith8888 0 points1 point ago

And that person has a job.

[–]modernwitch 0 points1 point ago

Reschmost.

[–]verndub 0 points1 point ago

You guys it's 430 in the morning... Give em a break.

[–]annie8979 0 points1 point ago

What!?! But How!?!

[–]trousershorts 1 point2 points ago

Perhaps he was "krilled" to death? Worse news typos have occurred...

[–]DeepRoot 0 points1 point ago

To what might you be referring?

[–]emann43 2 points3 points ago

You've never been krilled to death? It's a once in a life time experience.

[–]DeepRoot 0 points1 point ago

I'm thinking being "anything" to death is a once in a lifetime experience. Like that Daffy Duck gig on stage!

[–]trousershorts 1 point2 points ago

Many things... as long as krill is used to kill someone then that person has been krilled to death

[–]bcc79 0 points1 point ago

I've heard of people that have been killed but never killed to death!

[–]GeorgeForemanGrillz -1 points0 points ago

I'm going to kill you until you're dead!

[–]Captain_Gnardog 0 points1 point ago

What would of happened of the man had only been killed near-death?

[–]Canvasch 0 points1 point ago

What a terrible way to go.

[–]grok_spock 0 points1 point ago

i laughed for umpteen minutes!

[–]eifersucht12a 1 point2 points ago

Poor guy's going to be dead for the rest of his life.

[–]dilton7 0 points1 point ago

i saw a man killed to life once. Terrible!

[–]madfatter 0 points1 point ago

Upvotes for everyone on this thread. Genuine laughs were had. Now, I must go to bed.

[–]theconstipator -1 points0 points ago

HAHA. MURDER JOKES. HIOLARIOUS

[–]sir5ur 1 point2 points ago

this just in, man shat feces. breaking news, woman gave birth to child. tonight at nine, a parked car reportedly parked because someone parked it, more at nine.

[–]sprkng 0 points1 point ago

Reminds me of a local meme on l4d411.com about the witch in Left 4 Dead.

original thread

resulting poster

[–]AureusNex 1 point2 points ago

[–]peatoire 1 point2 points ago

Similar to that reporter or lawyer who said that Michael Jackson had woke up dead. http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2009/06/video-lawyer-knew-jackson-would-wake-dead

[–]WhoDatJoebear -1 points0 points ago

What? Was Superboy Prime in the control room that night or something?

[–]Zetavu 1 point2 points ago

Is that Jim Belushi?

[–]TheGuyAboveMeSucks 0 points1 point ago

He was killed, or even worse..

[–]jdpwnsyou 0 points1 point ago

Maybe he was the killer and his slaying spree ended only when he dropped dead...from killing.

[–]bones_tle 0 points1 point ago

"I will kill you until you die from it!"

[–]SmashingIC 0 points1 point ago

I usually leave the reposts alone, but damn it! This thing has circled the internet for far too long! It hurts my soul.

[–]Victorys 0 points1 point ago

[–]Oenonaut 0 points1 point ago

"Well, there's your problem."

[–]butters0114 1 point2 points ago

Dude looks like Chris Berman

[–]Biznack1812 0 points1 point ago

[–]subject1486 0 points1 point ago

Source: According to Jim

[–]Monya619 0 points1 point ago

Ya dont say

[–]jillay 0 points1 point ago

This is my hometown news station... THESE are my people... 0.o

[–]mayonesa 1 point2 points ago

[–]beuer 1 point2 points ago

Man WBTV always has the nicest looking newsroom compared to the other shitty local news stations in Charlotte

[–]NecroBlue 0 points1 point ago

compared to the other shitty local news stations in Charlotte >Fox 5am-9am 10pm-11pm

[–]pumpkindog 0 points1 point ago

Mr Kill?

[–]DragonMistress 0 points1 point ago

Killed to death by fatal murder. Makes sense.

[–]award07 0 points1 point ago

Last Tuesday I was totally almost killed to death guys...

[–]isu712 0 points1 point ago

In the words of Mitch Hedberg:

"That's a good place to end it."

[–]italianfood 0 points1 point ago

REPOST

[–]NecroBlue 0 points1 point ago

Oh channel 3, Charlotte North Carolina. I hate this News crew so much.

[–]csleigh8 0 points1 point ago

they'd likely have no problem getting a job at BofA

[–]NecroBlue 0 points1 point ago

Absolutely true

[–]Fuems 0 points1 point ago

[MURDER DEATH KILL]

[–]jselvey 0 points1 point ago

That's my hometown. He's at the police headquarters. facepalm

[–]JohnFist 0 points1 point ago

I hear that the killer is the lead suspect in this case, but its just a rumor for now...

[–]rubber_duckyy -1 points0 points ago

When did Jim Belushi start doing the news?

[–]USeemMad 1 point2 points ago

Repost upvoted to death.

[–]despiseDAmiser -1 points0 points ago

I up-voted clicking on the arrow pointing up ⇧

[–]bued07 -1 points0 points ago

"Man killed to death. Upvote to the left"

[–]SgtCrayon -2 points-1 points ago

Looks like Saul Goodman, better call saul!

[–]MrAlakad -2 points-1 points ago

that's the worst way to be killed!

[–]djk47 -3 points-2 points ago

[–]Eymn 0 points1 point ago

That's Jim from the "According to Jim" TV Show