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all 80 comments

[–]Kauaian11 10 points11 points ago

ill take the "poop in the box funcion"

[–]Dyolf_Knip 16 points17 points ago

That's not fair. One of my cats can poop in a toilet, too.

[–]raping_horsefucker66 0 points1 point ago

And you have to take a dog for a walk...

[–]Chemslayer 27 points28 points ago

The distinction here is "Naturally knows to shit in a box" vs "Must be trained rigorously or will shit on your couch"

[–]Flexter 0 points1 point ago

never trained my dog not to shit in house. Never shits in house

[–]RoxyMonoxide9 4 points5 points ago

My grandparents trained their dog to poop in a sandbox in the backyard.

[–]hooizyoo 1 point2 points ago

But kids play in the sandbox. That's the worst place to train your dog to poop.

[–]Lots42 6 points7 points ago

Not if you don't have kids.

[–]laura22lynne 8 points9 points ago

There are too many cat lovers on reddit for this picture

[–]GingerET 9 points10 points ago

My cat can't even poop in a box, she goes on the f***ing carpet two feet away from said box.

[–]Saviado 11 points12 points ago

Your car poops on your carpet? That is kinda weird

[–]Zingo_14 2 points3 points ago

Sounds like a leaky main seal. He should really get that checked out.

[–]GingerET 2 points3 points ago

And edit, just for reddit.

[–]Mudkipman 10 points11 points ago

BUT! Cats can predict death and dying. Your move canines.

[–]BurntTheToast 8 points9 points ago

Can protect a home. Can assist the blind. Can detect bombs and illegal substances. Used to subdue dangerous criminals. Can track down criminals and lost children. Can assist a hunter. Your move cats.

[–]PartyButton 34 points35 points ago

[–]Lots42 5 points6 points ago

/thread

[–]wtf_idontknow 5 points6 points ago

pfffffffff.... cats could do all this. But you know how many fucks they give?

[–]BurntTheToast -3 points-2 points ago

No because their scent receptors are inferior to a dog's. I understand the joke but to the uneducated they would take your comment literally and think that cats are capable of detecting bombs and fending off criminals.

[–]TheVoices297 2 points3 points ago

To those of us on the internet it means they can also poop rainbows.

[–]Bragzor 2 points3 points ago

Well, to be honest, we don't know how many receptors you need to do those things, and it's quite possible that cats could.

[–]wintercast 1 point2 points ago

I think horses have more receptors than dogs, and have been taught to do search and rescue, but seriously. If you needed my own horse to save your life (find you when lost) she would stop at the first patch of grass and leave you to freeze in the mountains somewhere. Horses really dont give a crap.

[–]tracerghost00 6 points7 points ago

Imagine the roughest dog. Now imagine numerous cats that weigh as much as that dog. Now imagine those cats are attack cats. Shit gets real.

[–]BurntTheToast -1 points0 points ago

Are you saying the weight adds up to the weight of the dog. Because there is no such thing as a cat even in an army that would attack a dog. Also cats are not very good at attacking in teams. Also cats have never and cannot be trained to be attack cats. They just don't follow orders.

[–]wtf_idontknow 3 points4 points ago

Because there is no such thing as a cat even in an army that would attack a dog.

Tell this to my cat who attacked our neighbors dog when he was chasing another neighbors cat.

Edit: Labrador btw.

[–]cycopl 2 points3 points ago

I tried but he walked away mid sentence and wouldn't respond when I called his name.

[–]trikillr42 2 points3 points ago

Yeah saying that they can never be trained to do that is just being ignorant. I'm sure in some terrible inhumane environment it's possible. Just not in your little world.

[–]BurntTheToast -2 points-1 points ago

Yes but in no sense can a cat or any group of cats ever come close to killing a tough dog. And the person I was directing my response towards stated that I could take the toughest dog. I have never heard of a person being killed by an aggressive out of control cat.

[–]trikillr42 6 points7 points ago

You know that lions and tigers are cats right? And they can kill a dog...

[–]BScatterplot 0 points1 point ago

Yes but in no sense can a chihuahua or any group of chihuahuas ever come close to killing a tough cougar. And the person I was directing my response towards stated that I could take the toughest cougar. I have never heard of a person being killed by an aggressive out of control chihuahua.

[–]BurntTheToast 0 points1 point ago

We are talking about domesticated cats and domesticated dogs. Not domesticated dogs and wild cougars. Your analogy is invalid.

[–]tracerghost00 0 points1 point ago

You haven't seen the cat who attacked an officer who was trying to sell him through tv. He wanted those sweet nuts sooooo bad.

[–]Vikaroo 1 point2 points ago

YouTube search 'cat attacks dog', it happens.

[–]Weenie 1 point2 points ago

Don't forget my personal favorite - Can warn you of a seizure before it happens.

[–]Nanigans -1 points0 points ago

Checkmate.

[–]MagnusTheGreat 0 points1 point ago

Rats can protect a home and detect bombs and illegal substances. Dogs are also rarely used to subdue dangerous criminals, because dangerous criminals usually have weapons...That's why they are dangerous.

Cats can't assist the hunter, because they are the hunter. They are funny, usually calm, they don't chew on things that you like and they are generally just rather nice.

Dogs are however good and awesome, but I'll take my cat over any dog any day.

[–]BurntTheToast 0 points1 point ago

Cats are not always generally nice. Cya have more of a tendency to be hateful and mean. Not with the dangers of being killed by a full grown dog but in a group of 6 cats my miter use to own 2 hated men, 1 hated everyone, and 1 was racist and bit black people. The other 3 were pretty normal.

[–]MagnusTheGreat 0 points1 point ago

This isn't Youtube. You are supposed to make sense from the beginning to the end. If I see another reply like this on Reddit, I will delete my previous comment to prevent others reading this.

I apologize in advance if this comment seems hostile. I am trying to understand this comment, and I have spent about 15 minutes reading it back and forth, but it makes little sense to me. It seems you are trying to say that you have a racist cat and 5 others, 1 that hates everyone, 1 that hates only 2 men, and 3 that seem pretty normal.

This is the part that I just can't understand.

Cya have more of a tendency to be hateful and mean. Not with the dangers of being killed by a full grown dog but in a group of 6 cats my miter...

[–]BurntTheToast 0 points1 point ago

Sorry. Cats have more of a tendency to be hateful, reclusive or resentful due to their natural instinct to be solitary and independent. But on the less common situation when a dog is hateful it has a larger risk of actually hurting you.

[–]TRogow -1 points0 points ago

I'm convinced they don't predict it, but instead cause it.

[–]Mudkipman -1 points0 points ago

They cause a lot of things. They cause hate in the world; but they can also be the cause of love. They're fucked up animals, man.

[–]TehLittleOne 2 points3 points ago

Not fair, my cat can't seem to hit the box.

[–]CastawayOnTheMoon 2 points3 points ago

...Then the canine proceeds to eat it's own poop.

[–]Mango_D0wn 6 points7 points ago

Kinda leaning towards the cat on this one

[–]2kidsnosleep 6 points7 points ago

Cat bashing on reddit. Brave and hilarious. Kudos!

[–]BuckyBadger22 3 points4 points ago

Dogs keep us safe. You ever heard of a bomb sniffing cat?

[–]NinjaNorris110 2 points3 points ago

Fun fact: even simple honey bees can be trained to detect bombs, and do a much better job. As a bonus it only takes around 30 minutes to train one while dogs take months.

[–]Jabberwokkey22 0 points1 point ago

GTFO

[–]RageFace_Bacon -1 points0 points ago

Cat people give up, dogs are mans best friend!

[–]Seath123 -1 points0 points ago

Cat still wins.

[–]dashiznit101 0 points1 point ago

Cats are cute but lazy. Dogs are fun as fuck and smart. Cats only serve one purpose. Funny photos.

[–]BScatterplot 1 point2 points ago

Checkmate, dogs.

[–]StarHat 1 point2 points ago

My rabbit can shit everywhere, your move, other animals.

[–]niamhish -1 points0 points ago

My cats are inside/outside cats and poop in the ditch. Ha!

Checkmate, catheists!

[–]rachelintexas 0 points1 point ago

This is true - dogs can be trained to do many great things. Yet most just hang out in backyards are on sofas all day. :(

[–]CavJake 0 points1 point ago

Do you know where we are?!?!! We are in enemy territory!! Find a place to hide!

[–]mackenga -1 points0 points ago

I believe all cats can detect cancer in humans. They just don't care; why should they? They all pet the same.

[–]YM_Industries 0 points1 point ago

Should have been:

Can poop in a box...but doesn't

[–]MadamShizz 0 points1 point ago

Well cats can detect cancer and most other illnesses in humans without being trained. So I guess a little poop in a box is a fair trade since they are born with the ability to save my life. However I dont think dogs shitting everywhere before and after you give them life saving abilities is a fair trade.

[–]MasterJohnboy -1 points0 points ago

The Internet has chosen cats as the dominant species

Don't question the Internet.

[–]tracerghost00 2 points3 points ago

Dog: Leaves house, costs half of price when bought to get back. Cat: Leaves house, comes back anyways.

Dog: Eats own shit, and grass, and shoes. Some times needing stomach pumped at ridiculous costs. Cat: Eats fancy cat dishes.

Dog: Barks at wall. Cat: Stares at everything.

Dog: Tears up living room furniture. Cat: Hairs up living room furniture.

Cat: Barks at new friends. Cat: Gives no fucks.

Dog: Looks like dumbass in every picture. Cat: Karma.

[–]tracerghost00 -4 points-3 points ago

I'm going by not trained by professionals.

[–]FUCKEAGAMES 0 points1 point ago

It doesn't take a professional to train a dog.

[–]Tnigs3 -1 points0 points ago

Cats suck

[–]spleenTCL 0 points1 point ago

One of my cats likes to suckle his own nipples so this statment has some truth to it.

[–]SometimesIpoop 2 points3 points ago

...and so the war began

[–]hooizyoo -1 points0 points ago

I wonder if people who love cats also love people that don't give a shit about them.

[–]Asuraa 0 points1 point ago

Also, cats have ~300 million neurons whilst dogs have a mere ~150 million.

[–]shenderon 0 points1 point ago

Cats will always be better.

[–]Romeulus11 -1 points0 points ago

I can see this post going down in flames since Redditors are such cat worshipper. But let's upvote until everyone wakes up!

[–]tjmjnj -1 points0 points ago

[–]bloodstainedking -1 points0 points ago

and how many people have been killed by house cats? checkmate, cats win...

[–]zombiesgirl03 -4 points-3 points ago

I also hate cats where my boyfriend loves them. His best defense is that they are "independent" sure, but dogs are so much cuter, smarter, protective and lovable.

[–]Derpybro 3 points4 points ago

How are dogs smarter and more lovable than cats?

[–]Roboticpirate 0 points1 point ago

Smarter? This

[–]Spirit_of_Jazz -1 points0 points ago

[–]ToastyNathan -2 points-1 points ago

The Internet isn't known for dogs

[–]joyfield -2 points-1 points ago

I think they here the song "Fuck you i wont do what you tell me" every second of their waking hour (which is not long). Still love them.