all 179 comments

[–]Calculusbitch 107 points108 points ago

How many wolves have you killed IRL? Probably none so how do you know that wolves actually doesn't carry around silver and bows?

[–]SpruceHalo 34 points35 points ago

Well I've never seen a wolf with a bow protruding from its stomach or making a ching ching noise every time it walks.

[–]ultrachris 80 points81 points ago

The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence.

[–]theskabus 38 points39 points ago

Does he look like a bitch?

[–]VoiceofKane 8 points9 points ago

What?

[–]Murkantilism 6 points7 points ago

I SAID, does he look, like a BITCH?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

What?

[–]iamandrus 7 points8 points ago

Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfucker, say 'what' one more goddamn time!

[–]DrxzzxrD 4 points5 points ago

Why?

[–]Scythels 2 points3 points ago

w-w-w-what?

[–]AfroConCarne 0 points1 point ago

Upvote for posting one of my favorite Boondocks scenes.

[–]TriplePlay2425 0 points1 point ago

Ed and Rummy are pretty fantastically hilarious. Samuel L. and Charlie Murphy did great jobs with them!

[–]shif 0 points1 point ago

im stealing that

[–]ErrantWhimsy 6 points7 points ago

Got to do a wolf necropsy at school once. Actually, it had the remains of no fewer than 5 animals in its stomach. They have an impressive capacity to eat.

[–]Twl1 12 points13 points ago

That's amazing, but I must ask: How many of those animals were archers?

[–]ErrantWhimsy 6 points7 points ago

One did have a bullet. Close enough? :/

[–]Twl1 1 point2 points ago

Depends, was it still fire-able?

[–]magnusarcanum 1 point2 points ago

I think what's worse is if you need, say, eight wolf pelts. About every other wolf you kill will drop a pelt. Clearly all of them have pelts.

[–]Zelcron 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, but the wounds you inflict upon it might make the pelt be less usable.

[–]_Allusion 0 points1 point ago

[–]Taodyn 164 points165 points ago

Well, he's carrying the bow because people keep killing the wolves.

The silver is bus fare.

[–]JewBoySandler 43 points44 points ago

That's one expensive bus fare.

[–]Taodyn 60 points61 points ago

Well, to and from work, obviously.

[–]JewBoySandler 32 points33 points ago

Well now it makes sense.

[–]idio3 41 points42 points ago

Does it? 14 silver a ride? Even assuming these are very small coins, it's still $28 per ounce, which would make a bus fare...

...hold on, why are we talking about fucking wolves riding buses in "bow-times" period RPGs?

[–]MNGaming 29 points30 points ago

People still use bows in modern days.

[–]idio3 42 points43 points ago

And wolves have jobs. That they take mass transit in order to get to.

OP is a dick for killing such a hard-working wolf.

[–]skullcrusherbw 12 points13 points ago

My last name's Wolf and I hunt with a bow(sometimes).

[–]idio3 6 points7 points ago

Do you carry silver coins on your hunting trips?

[–]skullcrusherbw 6 points7 points ago

Don't quarters contain a small amount of silver in them. If they do then yes.

[–]ImbeinThatGuy 2 points3 points ago

is your first name Dick?

[–]Appare 0 points1 point ago

I can't let you do that, Star Fox.

[–]Swrdfshtrmbns 1 point2 points ago

[–]idio3 0 points1 point ago

They didn't master paying fare's though.

[–]JamesHolziersAccount 0 points1 point ago

I wouldn't refer to modern times as bow times.

They use bows yes, but it's more of a Novelty. Guns are more accessible and easier ad more widely used,

[–]G_Platypus 2 points3 points ago

Well, if you wont do the math, I will!

The average weight of a silver coin during the roman empire ( I chose the roman empire because it falls in the epoch of bows and arrows, and because they had silver coins) was 3 grams. Given that silver, in today's market is 28.16 USD and there being roughly 28 grams in an ounce, we can deduct that one coin valued at its raw material would be worth about $2.72 USD. 14 times 2.72 is $38.

So that is a 38 dollar ride, one way.

[–]idio3 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, I was going to do all this work, then it dawned on me how ridiculous it would be.

Anyhow, that's quite a commute for our poor wolf's work. 300 km or so?..

[–]ancientshoes 1 point2 points ago

lol BOW-TIMES

i'm going to start using that. i'll be all like "back in the bow-times, we used to have to hunt animals if we wanted silver!"

[–]jsake 1 point2 points ago

welcome to vancouver.

[–]Mnawab 0 points1 point ago

gas is going up my friend

[–]jstarlee 0 points1 point ago

inflation, man.

[–]enderxzebulun 0 points1 point ago

Clearly the kingdom the wolf is a citizen of had its currency severely debased after having to bail out all the horse merchant and banking guilds

[–]Irish33 6 points7 points ago

I think he's going to the store in a dangerous neighborhood.

Either that, or some weird guy goes around knocking out woodland animals and giving them coins and weapons for you to find when you kill them, since he wants to help you along your journey in the slowest and most chaotic way possible. He gets off on that shit.

[–]The_Doctor_00 1 point2 points ago

I've assumed the money was there because they ate the hunters after them, and the bow... Er... same reason.

[–]Taodyn 1 point2 points ago

Nope. Bus fare.

[–]BeneathAnIronSky 0 points1 point ago

2 cuils. Someone up this to 3 cuils?

[–]Phideaux81 68 points69 points ago

I always imagined that the animal had swallowed the money, the bow I can not explain.

[–]Big-Baby-Jesus 30 points31 points ago

/r/gaming recently discussed this topic specifically about skaggs in Borderlands. In that game, not only do you find loot when you kill the animals, but you also get loot from their dung piles. That makes it clear that they eat random stuff.

A few gold pieces or a credit chip is one thing. But finding a sniper rifle or bow makes absolutely no sense. Also, would you put on a helmet that you just pulled out of an animal's gut?

[–]PigDog4 67 points68 points ago

Also, would you put on a helmet that you just pulled out of an animal's gut?

Depends, does it have better stats than my current helmet?

If it doesn't, do you know anyone who would want to buy a helmet I just pulled out of an animal's gut?

[–]stillnotking 4 points5 points ago

I've always been curious how you can fit 20 guns into the slot in a vending machine.

[–]runedeadthA 4 points5 points ago

It's never really said ingame, but they have sort of extra-dimensional storage, if you look on each characters model, they have a slot thing that they pull their weapons out of.

[–]stillnotking 3 points4 points ago

Scumbag Borderlands: has extradimensional storage technology, makes you go to the Underdome to use the bank.

[–]SlothOfDoom 24 points25 points ago

This was a discussion? The fucking game TELLS you that! I can;t count how many times I have seen the loading screen "Skags eat everything. Anything they cannot digest is regurgitated into a Skag Pile. "

[–]King_Pumpernickel 1 point2 points ago

Was just thinking this.

[–]marishtar -1 points0 points ago

It was a big skag.

[–]Cyberslasher 0 points1 point ago

Dude! Adventure quest answered this ages ago! There is one ranger NPC who gives you quests to go beat up cute furry animals and put gold and items onto them!!!

[–]EatBeets 0 points1 point ago

Hmm...would I ever wear a helmet made out of an ani-FUCK YEAH!

[–]BulletBilll 3 points4 points ago

Swallowed the bow too? Or maybe he was tired of hunters having a ranged advantage and thought it could practice, but then forgot to use it in a real fight which resulted in his death.

[–]jsake 4 points5 points ago

wolf ate a hunter carrying a bow and 28 silver.

[–]Xethos 1 point2 points ago

I figured they swallowed people.

[–]Ashtwain 0 points1 point ago

Being shot with an arrow?..

[–]LeafhopperV 17 points18 points ago

At least in Zelda when a creature drops a heart, it kinda makes sense.

[–]ASUstoner 35 points36 points ago

you must have missed this comic

[–]Illidan1943 15 points16 points ago

I think that's exactly why it makes sense

[–]ASUstoner 3 points4 points ago

right, I just ment to reference you to the comic. Im a bit buzzed sorry if my wording is awful

[–]LeafhopperV 1 point2 points ago

Ah , I got ya no problem.

[–]oodelay[!] 6 points7 points ago

In diablo II , a swarm of bugs can carry a plate mail and 15 gold pieces

[–]anteaterpenis 2 points3 points ago

'STRALIA

[–]LeafhopperV 2 points3 points ago

That strengthens my point, yeah.

[–]Xero19 21 points22 points ago

[–]JamesHolziersAccount 1 point2 points ago

I shall no longer kill animals in games unless they are evil

[–]erikpurne -4 points-3 points ago

Haha, beat me to it.

[–]Holstian 9 points10 points ago

Dead Space 2 had exploding babies that dropped weapon ammunition. I suspect that wolves and dead babies have some sort of coalition going on.

[–]jsake 3 points4 points ago

COLLUSION!!

[–]Insideoutwards 5 points6 points ago

That's what coalitions do.

[–]Bow2TheBeard 17 points18 points ago

blah blah Generic Macros and Memes blah blah Not an Appropriate Submission blah

[–]JamesHolziersAccount 4 points5 points ago

So You think it's cool to make a mockery of the rules huh?

[–]Bow2TheBeard 1 point2 points ago

I just see that section of the rules posted in each meme post, I just figured people were tired of hearing it, I know I am.

[–]JamesHolziersAccount 1 point2 points ago

punk ass kids these days

[–]V2Blast[M] 0 points1 point ago

blah blah Correct

[–]Wootai 5 points6 points ago

After playing Red Dead Redemption, where after every time I killed a wolf, i then had to skin it, and bring the skin to the trader to get a few dollars for the skin, that this was an RPGs way of shortening that exchange.

In other words, rather than have you collect the skin and bring it to a shopkeeper, you just get the gold right away. The bow would be like a little bonus that the shop keeper would give you for your patronage.

[–]ZapActions-dower 14 points15 points ago

"Generic" image macros/memes (where the character itself is not related to gaming) like Scumbag Steve, Good Guy Greg, etc. will be removed.

[–]V2Blast[M] 0 points1 point ago

indeed

[–]pastanate 17 points18 points ago

"Generic" image macros/memes (where the character itself is not related to gaming) like Scumbag Steve, Good Guy Greg, etc. will be removed. Something that "reminds you of a game", or "looks like something from a game" is also not an appropriate submission.

[–]V2Blast[M] 0 points1 point ago

yeeeeeee

[–]rohanivey 3 points4 points ago

The Bard's Tale makes a good point of it (Among most other RPG cliches).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fZue8dFeiw

[–]zeroGamer 0 points1 point ago

That game is hilarious. Everything about it is an awesome parody - even down to the gameplay itself, and level design.

[–]grayaus 2 points3 points ago

Where are the mods to? This needs to be taken down.

[–]V2Blast[M] 1 point2 points ago

Done. (Messaging us helps.)

[–]BlackStrain 1 point2 points ago

Of course they have bows. You wouldn't hand over your silver if they didn't.

[–]CJGibson 1 point2 points ago

TVTropes says Money Spiders.

[–]PantherReloaded 2 points3 points ago

Warning: tv tropes

[–]Twl1 2 points3 points ago

I went in knowing it was TV Tropes, I told myself "just the one, keep your head on, stay focused. Get in and get out," and I still lost an hour of my time.

[–]Ivallios 1 point2 points ago

This may or may not explain anything. 2:08

[–]Stevules 0 points1 point ago

Darn. I came here to post that.

[–]InfiniteDeath 1 point2 points ago

A wolf's gotta eat too! Shit ain't cheap nowadays.

[–]Crimyote 2 points3 points ago

Especially when you shit silver.

[–]computergroove 1 point2 points ago

Gothic 2, Oblivion, Skyrim, Morrwind etc. There are plenty of games that dont do this.

[–]STLFan2006 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, and three of them are Elder Scrolls games.

[–]steviesteveo12 0 points1 point ago

Well, you can still get gold out of dead animals in Skyrim.

Although, few things have made me feel more guilty than Skyrim "making" me hunt rabbits so that I could use their souls to power my enchantments.

[–]FartMart 0 points1 point ago

Black souls are where its at.

[–]MagnusTheGreat 0 points1 point ago

He ate the other adventurers.

[–]RogueTaco 0 points1 point ago

Didn't you know that dirt poor archers are the wolf's main prey?

[–]ManOfWonders 0 points1 point ago

The real question is where the fuck did it hide the bow?

[–]Fencehater 1 point2 points ago

Read this as "Every time I kill an animal with an RPG.."...

[–]MrBellator 1 point2 points ago

When I'm playing borderlands I always wonder why EVERYTHING drops ammo

[–]SlothOfDoom 1 point2 points ago

Because everything in borderlands fucking eats people. And every person in borderlands carries guns and ammo

Simple.

[–]arnoldhino 0 points1 point ago

You're lucky you get a bow every time...

[–]honeyfage 0 points1 point ago

SWG (pre-major fuckup at least, I never played after they changed everything) made a point of animals only dropping things that made sense, and had all money and weapons come from other sources.

[–]EricWRN 0 points1 point ago

Nigga don't question it, just take that shit.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]RoboLemur 0 points1 point ago

And it is a goddamn hysterical game. I may have to replay it now.

[–]ImmortalImitator 0 points1 point ago

Because you are level 50. If you were level 1, you wouldn't find anything.

[–]Nerkson 0 points1 point ago

I like to think that there's an animal cult out there somewhere that gives gifts to these animals by feeding them food until they are placated and sleep, and then attach weapons/trinkets/coin pouches to the animals as signs of offering to nature.

[–]HappyNacho 0 points1 point ago

In Fallout you could get raw meat. That seems more realistic.

[–]Wingly 0 points1 point ago

The wold killed someone at ate them. The person they ate had a bow and 28 silver. /thread

[–]CaptJoyceJun 0 points1 point ago

I was hoping for something about how the prime directive discourages interfering with the local animal life.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Because if there's a single creature that doesn't drop loot, then people will refuse to buy the game, the developer will go broke, and another game series will be dead.

You could also argue that it represents going to the animal's lair and finding the only useful bits left after it ate some random explorer. But that would be boring, so you don't have to play that bit out. But basically it's "players expect 'experience' money and items from every kill no matter what" and game developers give us what we keep buying.

At least Dragon Age had wolves drop wolf pelts as well. That made some sense, although I'm not sure that taking time out to skin a wolf during the middle of a battle was substantially more realistic.

[–]classy_motherfucker 0 points1 point ago

Rather have it unrealistic with a great loot system like in Diablo II than get 200 damn wolf pelts as in modern RPGs.

[–]narcolepsyinc 0 points1 point ago

Had this same thought today on Skyrim. Killed a spider carrying gold. I fear what spiders could do to our economy.

[–]abstractmind735 1 point2 points ago

In D3 mosquitoes drop weapons and shit....can't explain that

[–]mWo12 0 points1 point ago

actually, shit is easy to explain ;-)

[–]DraculaJorts 0 points1 point ago

wow. i'm extremely glad that you were here to finally point out this strange thing, monsters carrying currency in rpgs. i don't know how this had gone unnoticed up til this point, but surely, now that it is being expressed in an image macro with darth vader's face on it, the gaming world can identify and put a stop to this problem.

[–]myhandsarebananas 1 point2 points ago

I'm gonna be that guy. (But I'm not gonna be that guy that says, "Not to be that guy but...")

"Generic" image macros/memes (where the character itself is not related to gaming) like Scumbag Steve, Good Guy Greg, etc. will be removed. Something that "reminds you of a game", or "looks like something from a game" is also not an appropriate submission.

[–]V2Blast[M] 0 points1 point ago

Correct.

[–]pantiloons 1 point2 points ago

Found a ring on a crab once in Skyrim. Poor gal was engaged.

[–]Quizzelbuck 0 points1 point ago

Where are unclothed skeletons storing their gold pieces, and what were they planning on buying? Pants?

[–]nitefang 0 points1 point ago

Wow made a joke about this and sometimes you see rabbits running around with battle axes in their mouth. Looks hilarious.

[–]Burritoguy 0 points1 point ago

OK, I really had to scrape around for this classic. The original site doesn't appear to exist anymore, apologies for linking to archive.org.

http://web.archive.org/web/20060421051625/http://www.nomorefaith.co.uk/oblivion/

Link lifted from here, which is basically the same thing updated for Skyrim. I like the original's explanation for money carrying wildlife better though.

[–]Rhow 0 points1 point ago

Read that as "Killed an animal WITH an RPG."

[–]SirMarxism 1 point2 points ago

So even when you kill a squirrel you wonder why a wolf is carrying a bow and 28 silver?

[–]element395 0 points1 point ago

the one that always gets me is when they are carrying precious gems...

[–]I_h8_spiders 0 points1 point ago

Which game does this?

[–]THANE_OF_ANN_ARBOR 0 points1 point ago

I've been replaying Skyrim recently, and a lot of the wolves have amethysts in their insides. Why, wolves? Where do they find the time to eat so many jewels?

[–]I_h8_spiders 0 points1 point ago

I asked why whelps in WoW carried coins as well. I got told in general chat for not knowing my dragon lore. Never spoke in general chat again.

[–]the_need_to_post 1 point2 points ago

I read this as "Every time I kill an animal with an RPG"

[–]Mushy_64 0 points1 point ago

I'm like that every time I knock out a pokemon with pay day. How does a wild pokemon have 120 pokedollars?

[–]thefourthhouse 0 points1 point ago

From all the unfortunate adventurers that he had slain before you came along.

[–]giantjerk 0 points1 point ago

I always imagine that the wolf ate someone who was carrying that shit... and has a magically enlarged stomach or something.

[–]Munkir 0 points1 point ago

It ate someone who had a bow and some silver. Case solved bring in the dancing lobsters!

[–]WattleWaffle 0 points1 point ago

Well, perhaps the wolf ate a couple of humans with sliver on them and got shot by an arrow some time ago?

[–]BitingChaos 0 points1 point ago

EverQuest was amazing for this. Kill a snake; loot a rusty sword and a pairs of boots.

[–]urbanotter 0 points1 point ago

because it killed one of you ....

[–]Wittyfish 0 points1 point ago

If the wolf is in Skyrim, you're using a mod.

[–]Catheter 0 points1 point ago

Pinata!

But really, if it angers you, I suggest you try out Monster Hunter.

[–]Grimz1 0 points1 point ago

I'm upvoting this as hard as I can right now

[–]herpderpcake 0 points1 point ago

What fucking game has silver as currency? This is a gaming evolution!

[–]K0rilla 0 points1 point ago

WHY THE FUCK

are u complaining about getting extra items, you fucking gamer nerd?

[–]aberoth 0 points1 point ago

In Aberoth, even bees carry gold (of course, wolves do as well).

[–]Redxl1 0 points1 point ago

I always thought I was obvious, the bow and money are from previous victims. duh.

[–]readidThat 0 points1 point ago

Play Minecraft...almost everything you kill makes sense. I want to say everything but [8].

[–]original_4degrees 0 points1 point ago

let alone rifling through a skeleton's pockets and finding gold.

[–]balathustrius 0 points1 point ago

Bethesda games are fairly good about this. In Morrowind or Oblivion - can't speak for Skyrim, never having played it - a wolf would have a pelt.

[–]EmperorSofa 0 points1 point ago

My gripe was that I would kill an enemy soldier with obviously superior gear and they would not let me loot the corpse.

Kingdoms of Amalur had this problem. All these trash solders would have high quality near endgame quality prismer weapons and I had already killed at least 4 by the first 15 minutes of the game. They make you stick with your crappy iron weapons and leather.

[–]knight_simons 0 points1 point ago

Ate the silver carrying the bow for a friend

[–]CosmaiOwl 0 points1 point ago

Same goes for if an RPG quest calls for body parts - then you loot it and it's not there...

I see your head, fucker. You have one. Give me.

[–]Sand1p 0 points1 point ago

Ahhhh.. You just killed RobinHood from Disney movie..

[–]davidoford 0 points1 point ago

[–]The_Snailman 0 points1 point ago

I read "Every time I kill an animal with an RPG.." I was greatly disappointed to say the least.

[–]Verko[S] 0 points1 point ago

Hey, man! Those wolves attacked me first!

[–]tgunter 0 points1 point ago

I thought the way they handled monster item drops in The Witcher was kind of interesting—all of the items you get from monsters are actually parts of the monster's body (blood, fangs, poison, etc.), which you mostly use as components to make potions out of. If you haven't researched the monster (by reading about it in a book), you don't get any items from it because you don't know what parts of the body to keep.

[–]hotrod6978 0 points1 point ago

Because its a fucking game

[–]etetamar 0 points1 point ago

The wolf is preparing to hunt werewolves. The silver is for making the silver-tipped arrows.

Wolves hate werewolves as much as humans hate them, for the same reason (but in the other direction).

[–]boredweegie 0 points1 point ago

Insanity wolf is one prepared motherfucker.

[–]boxy_pete 0 points1 point ago

its because the animal is supposed to have eaten an adventurer carrying whatever it is. according to borderlands anyway. thats why the "secret boss" drops like 900 different weapons and whatnot.

[–]apocal7964 0 points1 point ago

hell FF1 for GBA the winter wolves cared flippin shields????????

[–]huntnm 0 points1 point ago

He got dat YOUTUBE MONEEEEYYYYYYYY

[–]gnagniel 0 points1 point ago

[–]katchison02 0 points1 point ago

That bow is probably worthless if it drops "Every time" you kill an animal.