this post was submitted on
760 points (53% like it)
6,659 up votes 5,899 down votes

funny

subscribe2,451,454 readers

9,285 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

Added because /r/funny is viewed by users who may be underage, at work etc. Users Submitting Dick Pics etc and Racist submissions or comments and Inappropriate content will be BANNEDInstantly, No If's and or but's. - Those submissions belong in /r/nsfwfunny or elsewhere on reddit - Not here.

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 199 comments

[–]jschro 187 points188 points ago

He's eyeing the ground... dat grass.

[–]CrunxMan 58 points59 points ago

Grass on the field.

[–]whoopygoldberg 23 points24 points ago

Play ball?

[–]curious_about_mars 5 points6 points ago

no grass on the field? play volleyball.

[–]PointlessDelegation 31 points32 points ago

No. Flip em' over and play in the mud. I'll see myself out...

[–]RedditorAkira -1 points0 points ago

Grass on the field, kill the president. Amirite? American Dad references :P

[–]becoming_the_batman 17 points18 points ago

far more likely.

[–]tronn4 9 points10 points ago

He glancd at the girl... DAT LASS

[–]clickwir 7 points8 points ago

Not me.

[–]CrimsonSun99 -1 points0 points ago

did you post it yet?/

[–]theMightyFeline -1 points0 points ago

But his hoof, look where he's got that thing planted..

[–]TimonBerkowitz 1 point2 points ago

He sees a donkey and plans to make a mule. dat ass

[–]POOP_ALL_THE_PARTIES -5 points-4 points ago

gay

[–]Sierus -1 points0 points ago

Negative karma account?!

Time to upvote!

[–]original-finder 60 points61 points ago

Original Submission (100%): Horse Hugs Human [D]

Posted: 2h before this post by plasker6 (fixed by cookiee93)

Link not posted to same subreddit: aww -> funny

This comment generated by an automated bot. Is this match wrong?

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]444775 1 point2 points ago

I think that the idea in a case like this, where the original is altered, is to provide a link for someone who may not have seen the original post earlier in the day.

[–]ThugAimer 37 points38 points ago

"Dat Ass" popped into my head before I even sw the words.

[–]swagmeister23 10 points11 points ago

I'm so terribly average.

[–]Coryshepard117 3 points4 points ago

Sigh. Me too.

[–]ThugAimer -2 points-1 points ago

i dont understand why you would sigh. ha

[–]SRHOASNSEY 6 points7 points ago

I gave you an upvote when you were at negative one....when you learn how to comment properly then you have my permission to die.

[–]Skarma64 2 points3 points ago

Ah! I was wondering what would break first, your spirit, or your Grammer!

[–]Almost_Ascended 0 points1 point ago

"No, I'm a horse you stupid girl."

[–]InsZod_ 1 point2 points ago

I feel connected with you

[–]ThugAimer 3 points4 points ago

enough to make babies?!!?!?

[–]InsZod_ 2 points3 points ago

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

that all depends, too many variables...

[–]tier19345 94 points95 points ago

is it strange that i expected a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker hugging someone

[–]charonsobol 37 points38 points ago

Is it strange that someone will probably submit that with [FIXED] added at the end?

[–]samsquamsch 4 points5 points ago

If that happens someone can screenshot this series of comments and rake in some more of that good stuff.

[–]wtfwouldmazdo 2 points3 points ago

aaaand, it happened.

[–]psyducktustin 17 points18 points ago

No I expected that too

[–]Sarke1 17 points18 points ago

Me too, and I'm glad it wasn't. Those jokes are just beating a dead Sarah Jessica Parker.

[–]infinityprime 2 points3 points ago

was thinking the same.

[–]prettyawkwardpenguin 1 point2 points ago

I thought that, before I realised people wouldn't really let her hug them.

[–]thaginganinja 0 points1 point ago

no, what would be strange is if someone added the brazzers logo to this.

[–]Combustibutt 1 point2 points ago

Honestly, once I saw the title what I expected was a lot weirder than that, knowing Reddit as I do.

[–]iDontSayFunnyThings 26 points27 points ago

This has got to be the worst fixed post I've seen yet. Wow.

[–]koy5 -1 points0 points ago

Wtf are you talking about MS Paint is awesome!

[–]carouselunicorn 58 points59 points ago

You realize this girl is like 14, right?

[–]Pumpernickell 4 points5 points ago

Not with that ass

[–]Hooin_Kyoma 78 points79 points ago

"That's even better." -Billy Mays

[–]drzan 25 points26 points ago

Maybe that's why the sting ray got him.

[–]Doomfield 8 points9 points ago

That's a spoon.

[–]arborcide 9 points10 points ago

Oi see you've played knoifey-spooney before.

[–]fezzinate 3 points4 points ago

There is no spoon.

[–]Grandmaofhurt 14 points15 points ago

That doesn't bar her from having a good looking ass.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Grandmaofhurt 6 points7 points ago

First off, what? who's whipping what out?

Second, I'm pretty sure if someone wanted to fap to that picture, they could and have the police be the least of their worries.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]DieWukie 4 points5 points ago

I don't know if he's right but he's got a point.

[–]ElyBoBelly 6 points7 points ago

The picture itself is of a kid though. It's like looking at pics of Miley cyrus when she was small and justifying it by saying she's of age now.

[–]Zachpeace15 0 points1 point ago

But, I'm 16. I'm allowed to look... HA Suck it!

[–]hitlerwasright -4 points-3 points ago

Reddit is full of unemployed adult male virgin mysoginistic pedophiles. If you want upvotes, you have to tell them what they want to hear.

[–]Undermind 7 points8 points ago

Apparently they didn't want to hear that.

[–]Astrocricket 3 points4 points ago

Hitler WAS right

[–]ElyBoBelly 2 points3 points ago

I know that all too well.

[–]Dantayl 0 points1 point ago

Is that how it works? I'll take out my old baby pictures then and everyone can have a wank to them. Gather around, all.

[–]clickwir 24 points25 points ago

Plausible deniability. Unless you prove otherwise, then we can assume otherwise.

[–]IHaveAScatFetishAMA 13 points14 points ago

"It's not pedo if we don't know her age"

[–]BobbyRayBands 18 points19 points ago

Obligitory Ephebophile no Pedophile.

[–]derpaling 10 points11 points ago

I thought the word was "normal guy".

[–]AtomicDog1471 2 points3 points ago

Red blooded male

[–]WascillyWabbit7 23 points24 points ago

Girls are like squaring numbers, if there under 13 just do them in your head.

[–]ncocca 7 points8 points ago

gotta love Bo

[–]deathcomesilent 1 point2 points ago

Also gotta love people who try and pass off others jokes at their own.

[–]WascillyWabbit7 13 points14 points ago

Since when do I have to cite a joke?

[–]deathcomesilent 1 point2 points ago

You don't, it's just classy to do so.

[–]WascillyWabbit7 0 points1 point ago

Girls are like squaring numbers, if there under 13 just do them in your head.

-Bo Burnham

[–]deathcomesilent 1 point2 points ago

You sir are one classy motherfucker.

[–]WascillyWabbit7 0 points1 point ago

Why thank you.

[–]ncocca 3 points4 points ago

Yea, that was my nice way of pointing that out. I'm feeling friendly.

[–]WascillyWabbit7 1 point2 points ago

Haha yup! Bo is the best.

[–]timmymac -3 points-2 points ago

they're

[–]nathanb065 3 points4 points ago

It's Horsedick dot mpeg!

[–]dezweb 1 point2 points ago

If that...

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]tehdonut 8 points9 points ago

i was expecting the brazzers thing.

[–]Dick_Serious 18 points19 points ago

I hate reddit sometimes.

[–]exnor 1 point2 points ago

Me too. It's a great site, except for all the pedophiles... but "all the pedophiles" is a kind of huge downside.

[–]Dick_Serious 0 points1 point ago

It drives me nuts that there cant be ANY sort of post with a girl in it without the comments delving IMMEDIATELY into perversion. No matter what the post is, if there's a girl in it, it gets completely pervy within 5 seconds.

I spose it shouldn't surprising given reddits demographic... But still.

[–]Canvasch 8 points9 points ago

Here is the reason [FIXED] posts are dumb. All you did was add text, that could have easily been a comment. But no, it had to be an entirely new post.

[–]JaggerA 1 point2 points ago

It WAS a comment. All of them, to be exact.

[–]forsakenpariah 0 points1 point ago

I am not subscribed to /r/aww and I wouldn't have seen this post otherwise. If you don't like it just downvote it and move along.

[–]darkharlequin 0 points1 point ago

yup, unsubscribed from /r/aww and res filter /r/aww so this was new and entertaining to me.

[–]CitrusFreak12 7 points8 points ago

God damn it, Reddit.

[–]mystic_vegito 14 points15 points ago

So does this really warrant a new submission? it just reflects every comment in the other thread.

[–]uptoke_hero 0 points1 point ago

I'm sure I'm not the only one that thought there would be Sarah Jessica Parker in this picture

[–]darkharlequin 1 point2 points ago

there's not?

[–]blakerz25 0 points1 point ago

I gave you your 1,000th up vote, due to the fact I was in the process of making this.

[–]Teagueface 0 points1 point ago

Someone had to do it, i knew i wasnt alone here

[–]aspergers-hermit 2 points3 points ago

Talk about a thoroughbred, and the horse is pretty good too.

[–]mojam 2 points3 points ago

that horse must have been devastated when they shut down /r/jailbait

[–]Dismiss 2 points3 points ago

People are getting karma by opening paint, copying a comment in the original thread, pasting the text in the picture, saving and reposting the exact same thing with "[FIXED]" in the end? Cool.

[–]MunchieMunch 0 points1 point ago

HEY! Look guys, he added "dat ass" to the picture .. Phahahaha! Thats funny because it looks like the horse is checking out that girls ass. Man, thats comedy gold right there.

[–]Dick_Serious 0 points1 point ago

Because there were only 4 million "dat ass" comments in the original.

We REALLY needed more.

[–]paradigmshift7 1 point2 points ago

I'd find this more amusing if the girl wasn't a 13 year-old

[–]Dick_Serious 0 points1 point ago

Sadly, I knew this comment would get downvoted to shit.

Dude, your sposed to just say "dat ass" and move on. It doesnt matter how young the girl is. This is reddit. Every girl who isnt fat is a sex object.

[–]HireALLTheThings 1 point2 points ago

Seriously? Your only fucking contribution to this picture was writing "dat ass" on it. Why the fuck did you feel the need to waste space on /r/funny?

[–]ruled_by_fear 32 points33 points ago

HOLY SHIT GUYS WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF SPACE ON REDDIT~!!

[–]GMan129 12 points13 points ago

FUCK YOUR LETTER SIZE IS TAKING UP TOO MUCH SPA-

[–]Curtor 1 point2 points ago

I logged in just do down vote him. I'm really not liking what Reddit has become in the last year or so. It's filled with things like this, and people upvote it.

[–]somepoorsap 1 point2 points ago

This struck me as a photo that was snapped in that moment of blissful ignorance, like when you think your dog is just being playful before you realize he is actually humping your leg and the full horror of the situation sets in.

[–]darkharlequin 0 points1 point ago

fuckin family reunions, amiritie!?

[–]jaygibby22 0 points1 point ago

i clicked expecting much worse. I was well prepared to be faced with mr hands. I am glad it hadn't come to that

[–]darkharlequin 1 point2 points ago

horse.avi

[–]Backawayfromthecar 0 points1 point ago

"Please don't be Mr. Hands, please don't be Mr. Hands... Phewwww thank God."- me

[–]theshryock 1 point2 points ago

First thought: who wears bootyshorts around a stable... you can even get on the horse wearing those

[–]wurtis16 0 points1 point ago

RELEASE THE HORSE PORN!!!

[–]BobbyGrill -1 points0 points ago

All I see is my horse rising GIGGITY GIGGITY

[–]las2385 0 points1 point ago

I expected a brazzers logo

[–]microburst 0 points1 point ago

Still not fixed. Missing brazzers and Sarah Jessica Parker photoshop combo ftw

[–]soapman5 -1 points0 points ago

Friendzone level=horse

[–]L4cer8 0 points1 point ago

"Just like the hugs mother won't give me..."

[–]_that_one_guy 1 point2 points ago

Sarah Jessica Parkers a lesbian?

[–]vicothesico 1 point2 points ago

was expecting BRAZZERS

[–]clydetorrez 0 points1 point ago

I've never been that close to a horse, but have always admired them from afar. The muscle definition on the animal in that photo is intimidating. No wonder police ride them. Nobody wants to mess with a 1,500(?) pound dog.

[–]SuperMalley96 2 points3 points ago

[–]suckthisdeth -1 points0 points ago

this was "fixed" much better multiple times over in the originals comments.

[–]seriousbsns 0 points1 point ago

Sadly, I am now envisioning bestiality.

[–]d_spaceley1 1 point2 points ago

All you did was take the top comment, and put it into the photo.

[–]loganfire3 -1 points0 points ago

When I saw it was fixed I expected to see a sara Jessica parker pic.

[–]RandyBspot 1 point2 points ago

its exactly what I thought when i saw the original.

[–]DJ_Hipfrotize 1 point2 points ago

I was pleasantly surprised to see this didn't involve Sarah Jessica Parker. That gets you an upvote :)

[–]asldkfououhe -3 points-2 points ago

what the fuck is the matter with you people

[–]stealth-fap 0 points1 point ago

Alright, who is going to post a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker hugging someone next?

[–]Jesus_Chris 0 points1 point ago

Fuck it, let's get this over with already and kill the horse, then beat it.

[–]darkharlequin 0 points1 point ago

then fuck it, then eat it.

[–]PedobearLV 1 point2 points ago

What happens next.... Sexy time!!!

[–]jrgolden42 1 point2 points ago

Oh God... ಠ_ಠ

[–]PedobearLV -1 points0 points ago

Nom nom nom....

[–]suddenly_ponies -2 points-1 points ago

[–]CantLookHimInTheEyeQ 0 points1 point ago

Wow. That was so much more wholesome and adorable than I expected. Thanks.

[–]suddenly_ponies -2 points-1 points ago

[–]razkal -1 points0 points ago

Dat arrrrhhhhssse

[–]kenokenokeno -1 points0 points ago

brazzers`?

[–]I3aisden -1 points0 points ago

Go to the original post. There's plenty of renditions of it.

[–]Solvoid -5 points-4 points ago

more pics of the girl please

[–]missmisfit -3 points-2 points ago

Why is she hugging a horse in her undies anyway?

[–]FanboyChumChum 2 points3 points ago

Not undies, volleyball shorts

[–]Bazing1980 -1 points0 points ago

Investigating this immediately!

[–]mojam 1 point2 points ago

For science!

[–]SUS_ -3 points-2 points ago

This was my exact thought on the op

[–]Tangalor -2 points-1 points ago

I can't help but hear Barry White's voiceover on this one.

[–]t0e_jam 0 points1 point ago

Expected a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker. Was dissapoint.

[–]walterqxy -2 points-1 points ago

Horse bit me when I was 2. First memory. Still have scar 19 years later. Fuck horses.

[–]ChuckCharles420 0 points1 point ago

Human hugs donkey: dat ass.

[–]Beyond556 -2 points-1 points ago

I know it's why I upvoted the original pic.

[–]cardinalwolsey -5 points-4 points ago

And now the FBI will arrest all of you because she is way to young.

[–]darkharlequin 2 points3 points ago

that horse looks of legal age.

[–]greatdane1009 -2 points-1 points ago

Look at those shorts. The title should be Horse Hugs Whore. Say that shit 10 times fast.

[–]elbruce -5 points-4 points ago

Has anybody Brazzers'd it yet?

[–]LordDerpingtons -5 points-4 points ago

Brazzers.

[–]laschupacabras -3 points-2 points ago

It's a horse, not a donkey.

[–]hanjoba -1 points0 points ago

Thought it said horse hung human.

[–]CoyoteStark -3 points-2 points ago

Not what I was expecting when I googled 18+year+old+horse, but is nice.

[–]BoogieWoogieFungShui -2 points-1 points ago

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought of that when I saw the picture.

[–]i_dnt_always_comment -4 points-3 points ago

I find girls who are hot but not trying to be hot so much hotter that hot girls trying to be hot. Add ur own commas!

[–]darkharlequin 0 points1 point ago

this post put me into a comma,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ;)

[–]i_dnt_always_comment 0 points1 point ago

I'm new to reddit, stop being such a colon :)

[–]darkharlequin 0 points1 point ago

hey, I was only semi-colon thank you. Very parenthetical of you.

[–]d4ni3lg -4 points-3 points ago

i really wanted to make this post myself but wasn't sure if she was old enough...

[–]freemilly -5 points-4 points ago

my thoughts exactly on the oricinal post

[–]bemky -4 points-3 points ago

mmmm got a fat butt

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]correct_spelling 5 points6 points ago

*definitely

*They're