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top 200 commentsshow all 308

[–]khelemvor 926 points927 points ago

If at first you don't succeed, hold him upside down underwater.

[–]murderbum999 597 points598 points ago

And drag his spine up and down a sharp stone edge.

[–]BirdManFlyHigh 136 points137 points ago

And pee in his eye.

[–]RockasaurusRex 147 points148 points ago

Then make him show you his wiener. 'Cause that'd be so gay of him. Am I right guys?

[–]Broteezy 43 points44 points ago

What next guys? This is getting pretty hot!

[–]fishgats 59 points60 points ago

You're cute as hell. l could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys, make like a circus seal. Hey, what're you, a fucking faggot? I hate guys. I love women!

[–]laspace 39 points40 points ago

ಠ_ಠ

[–]star_witness 24 points25 points ago

Upvote for Jay and Silent Bob reference (and for the guy who didn't get it).

[–]hawksterdh 5 points6 points ago

Clerks has to be one of the better comedies out there. Fuck. Fuck. Mother Mother fuck.

[–]logicallyillogical 8 points9 points ago

Ever had your asshole licked by a fat guy in an overcoat?

[–]usernameisimpossible 0 points1 point ago

i just got an aneurysm

[–]Setacics 4 points5 points ago

Then get the phrases "Are you OK?" and "I'm fucking sorry" mixed up and yell "Are you fucking sorry?!" at him.

[–]notanotherpyr0 47 points48 points ago

HE TOLD ME HE DIDN'T WANT TO LIVE LIKE A VEGETABLE!

[–]Dylan_the_Villain 14 points15 points ago

At least he was trying to help, unlike the guy to the far left who immediately starts backing away.

[–]kzei_ 30 points31 points ago

The guy that dipped him in upside down was the same dude who let go late and made him hit his back on the edge, lol.

[–]chobi83 14 points15 points ago

You mean didn't let him go at all? He freaking held his foot the whole time.

[–]RedFlocks 8 points9 points ago

He definitely did that on purpose. He thought he'd be able to hold him upside down by himself.

He's dumb.

[–]six_six_twelve 1 point2 points ago

Yup. I didn't see it until you said it.

[–]Wargon 33 points34 points ago

I was like 4 posts past this one, but this comment kept repeating in my head making me laugh so I came back to upvote it harder than I've ever upvoted before.

[–]Frankstg 9 points10 points ago

Well congratulations!

[–]V1ZROY 2 points3 points ago

Now that's a failed rescue if I ever did see one

[–]spiral_of_agnew 2 points3 points ago

It was ALL that guy's fault. He's the one who didn't release him in the first place.

[–]smplejohn 5 points6 points ago

I'm crying laughing over here. Thanks.

[–]AcesHigh22 2 points3 points ago

I couldn't hold the mouse steady enough to click upvote for a good minute. I stopped laughing, upvoted, read it again, and I'm laughing again.

[–]ManFromViltrum 62 points63 points ago

So do we let go on three or is it one, two, three let go?

[–]court12b 44 points45 points ago

For the love of spines everywhere. it's 3, 2, 1, GO. Nobody should ever use any other method for action synchronization.

[–]SamusAranX 17 points18 points ago

or: "on 3; 1... 2... 3!"

[–]Dylan_the_Villain 27 points28 points ago

What I hate is when people say "Alright, on 3. Ready? 3... 2... 1... GO!"

It wasn't on 3, you liar, it was on go which came after 1.

[–]lmpervious 3 points4 points ago

Well then someone might go "Three, two, ONE!" and throw them. :O

[–]court12b 1 point2 points ago

It's a simple mnemonic device"when do you go? When I say GO!".

[–]cI_-__-_Io 0 points1 point ago

Nobody should ever use any other method for action synchronization

This is my favourite

[–]Whitestrake 0 points1 point ago

I say, "On my mark - three, two, one, mark."

Not only does it sound badass, but it makes me feel badass when me and my friend are lining up headshots on Zeds while playing DayZ.

[–]ticklesoda 3 points4 points ago

One, two, FIVE!

[–]EllipsisObsessive 3 points4 points ago

... Gabe?

[–]djm1st 2 points3 points ago

Three, sir!

[–]framk 0 points1 point ago

It's your ass, Cochise.

[–]extraneouspanthers 152 points153 points ago

In all seriousness, was that guy okay?

[–]Ryanair 80 points81 points ago

Went stiff pretty quick. I wouldn't be sure. Not dead, but at least something broke in his back.

[–]tvreruns 440 points441 points ago

Thank you, Dr. Internet.

[–]Ryanair 36 points37 points ago

Well, after I saw that happening when my ex broke her back during bouldering I just remembered. She had 3 operations now and can walk again, but it was horrible to see.

[–]ismaithliomvag 56 points57 points ago

Your flights may be cheap Ryanair, but I expect to be dropped at my destination, not 20 miles away.

[–]Mug_of_Tetris 1 point2 points ago

What I went looking for the moment I saw 'Ryanair' as a username

[–]jmarx 8 points9 points ago

AAAaaaaandddd why did you break up with her, huh?

[–]james9075 4 points5 points ago

nice try, Ryanair's ex-OAG

[–]Ryanair 0 points1 point ago

Heh, nothing to do with that. She moved to a different city about 150km away.

[–]and_yet_and_yet 3 points4 points ago

How'd she break her back bouldering, if you don't mind me asking?

[–]Fealiks 29 points30 points ago

Bouldering.

[–]and_yet_and_yet 5 points6 points ago

Hilarious.

[–]Fealiks 10 points11 points ago

To answer your question seriously, she actually hit her lower back on one of the boulders and it slid her vertebrae out of place. Are there boulders involved in bouldering? I don't really know what bouldering is. I'm not the guy whose ex's back broke, I'm the other guy. Gotcha! Heh.

[–]Berticus88 0 points1 point ago

bouldering is rock climbing without the safety harness.

[–]Ryanair 0 points1 point ago

Looked rather silly. She fell about 3 meters from a training wall directly on her coccyx and one of her lower vertebrae snapped. She was unable to move anything until after the first OP and unable to talk for a few minutes. Horrible moment.

[–]and_yet_and_yet 2 points3 points ago

Oh jesus, that's awful. Why didn't she have a crash pad or a spotter?

[–]Alphaeno 6 points7 points ago

Fuck bouldering...messed up my knee and now I can't sprint :(

[–]lecorboosier 7 points8 points ago

and who's to blame for that, "alphaeno"

[–]Alphaeno 0 points1 point ago

myself... I was on top (I think about 15ft up), slipped and kinda swung with my right hand. I lost my grip and the momentum carried me far enough to miss the big soft pad. The floor is still padded, but not as much as the pads you move to protect yourself. No insurance. Got an MRI, doctor said he doesn't think anything broke but to come back in. I said fuck that because I didn't have insurance and couldn't afford to keep going back and pay for physical therapy.

Sucks being poor :(

Also, I did have a great job and insurance, but was let go only 3 days earlier, lol.

[–]tvreruns 1 point2 points ago

Glad she's okay.

[–]FuckYoureShit 0 points1 point ago

Should have just held her upside down then told her to climb out of a cave.

[–]iLuVtiffany 0 points1 point ago

No, no. If it was Dr. Internet giving medical advice, he'd have cancer.

[–]buster2Xk 29 points30 points ago

Have you ever fallen on your back onto something really hard? Hurts like fuck and you won't be able to move right away even if nothing's broken. It probably just really hurt for a while.

[–]ichae 10 points11 points ago

you won't be able to move right away even if nothing's broken

so, he drowned, then?

[–]Engineer3227 2 points3 points ago

Well he was almost saved... But then the attempt turned unsuccessful and his body slid underwater.

When he didn't surface after 5 minutes the other guys quietly sneaked away as they realized it was no longer a joke.

[–]buster2Xk 1 point2 points ago

Well I certainly hope someone helped him if he couldn't help himself...

[–]Ryanair 0 points1 point ago

Could be that too. Just remembered me about something I saw personally.

[–]virionspiral 0 points1 point ago

This can happen. I was running across a street in the Bahamas and the median had a section of loose gravel to divide the traffic. I jumped up onto the median, slid, and the middle of my back hit the curb. Temporarily paralyzed and started having spasms. Laid on the ground for five minutes before I could walk.

[–]Berticus88 0 points1 point ago

Learn to tumble. Excellent way to dissipate potential energy.

[–]Eupho 6 points7 points ago

If he did break his back he'd go limp not stiff. Where do you get that from?

[–]dhorrible 5 points6 points ago

I've flown Ryanair enough to know that I shouldn't listen to anything you say.

[–]extraneouspanthers 7 points8 points ago

I just want to point out my inbox reminded me this conversation took place in /r/funny =[

[–]Rayezilla 5 points6 points ago

yeah, this definitely strikes me as more of a r/wtf gif or something.

[–]d4vi3j03 0 points1 point ago

This is not /r/wtf... more like /r/ouch

[–]extraneouspanthers 0 points1 point ago

If you broke your back, you wouldn't be saying "ouch".

[–]derpinita -1 points0 points ago

Fuuuuuuuck. FUuuuck!

[–]Bitemarkz 0 points1 point ago

Only the one guy who caused the injury seemed to think so. Everyone else seemed concerned.

[–]A-H -1 points0 points ago

Neurosurgeon here.. tough to tell based on the video. His legs didn't go limp immediately which is a good sign. He may very well have an extension fracture through the thoracic spine as well as laminar and spinous process fractures.

[–]just_around 78 points79 points ago

That's worse than what I thought was going to happen. It'd have been less painful to be swung into the wall.

[–]ungulate 16 points17 points ago

It'd've been awesomer to use "It'd've".

[–]liquidegg 9 points10 points ago

I disagree. It'd've'nt.

[–]tashamjs 98 points99 points ago

that's a fucking spinal right there. not particularly funny

[–]ohyeahepic 26 points27 points ago

this is how xmen: first class should of ended

[–]AngelaAnaconda 29 points30 points ago

Should have*

[–]ohyeahepic 6 points7 points ago

You are right and I am wrong. Forgive me?

[–]joshjje 2 points3 points ago

Well they said his plan didnt cover spinal manipulations.

[–]Zeydon 0 points1 point ago

Oh I assumed This was r/wtf

[–]capriceragtop 0 points1 point ago

"I've seen a lot of spinals, Dude, and this guy is a fake. A fucking goldbricker."

[–]andrewsmith1986 445 points446 points ago

First we break his back and then we drown him*

*read in bane's voice

[–]Benb121 289 points290 points ago

When your spine is broken, you have my permission to drown.

[–]hoodie92 123 points124 points ago

Ah! I was wondering what would break first: your lungs, or your spine.

[–]fosterroberts 28 points29 points ago

You have been supplied with false friends to stop you from tearing down in this very fun pool. Let me tell you the truth about your friends from the words of your local teen crime unit. 'Your other friends didn't murder your spine, they wanted to save you then take you to the pool so that they could, to my joy, have a really fun day with you. I praised the false friends who tried to crack your spine but I can no longer live with my lie. It is time to trust your real friends with the truth and it is time for you to fight back. And do you accept this ultimate truth? Do you realize that your friends are trying to kill you? Until you're dead?

[–]BlackZeppelin 18 points19 points ago

A few things.

  • I read the whole thing out loud in my best impression of Bane.

  • I want to watch TDKR again

  • How many times have you seen it that you memorized that speech?

[–]Beanbaker 4 points5 points ago

record it and post it. Then you have my permission to be upvoted.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Beanbaker 2 points3 points ago

Hahaha, 10/10 for effort. Would listen to again :)

[–]irategazebo 5 points6 points ago

...well at least youre not a liar.

[–]ocnarfsemaj 1 point2 points ago

I just realized who he was talking about... AW SHITTT

[–]ocnarfsemaj 2 points3 points ago

Literally, first time laughing out loud at a string of reddit comments.

[–]silentkill144 5 points6 points ago

I read this first in a happy tone of voice.

I like my choice better.

[–]blasianninja 1 point2 points ago

Your spirit? Or your body?!

[–]Crankrune 0 points1 point ago

"When your spine is pieces, you have my permission to drown."

[–]JabblesSon 16 points17 points ago

STOP HELPING!!

[–]beatbot 13 points14 points ago

When I was a kid in lifeguard class, we had to watch a film called Sudden Impact. Mostly it's an interview with a girl who's friends threw here in the pool, fucked up and broke her spine. Now she can't walk. Her boyfriend (one of the guys who threw her) dumped her a month later.

As a former lifeguard: PWEEEEET NO FUCKING AROUND!!!

[–]LisaM87 2 points3 points ago

As a fellow former lifeguard, I definitely saw that same video, as well as several other sob-inducing videos. Pool deck horseplay is NOT COOL!

[–]beatbot 2 points3 points ago

I remember punishing kids for running over and over and over, then the SAME damn kid runs, slips and smashes the back of their head on the pool deck. Jesus kid... You think I'm just inventing rules to ruin your fun? Or maybe I'm trying to protect you from your dumb ass self. Fuck!

[–]uhbijnokm 0 points1 point ago

As yet another former lifeguard. I now hate kids. Bored after 10 seconds in the water, all they want to do is try to break the rules.

[–]Diiiiirty 1 point2 points ago

As a fellow former lifeguard, I ALSO saw the same video, and I would be dishing out some serious-ass time-outs.

[–]Silversol99 0 points1 point ago

Calling it 'horseplay' really doesn't convey the danger in my opinion. I'm not sure what else you'd call it though...

[–]CGrimz7 12 points13 points ago

Holy shit I thought the kid on the right had a peg leg at first. Videos with a pudgy, peg legged bystander are rare.

[–]EMPIRESx 9 points10 points ago

Im pretty sure i just saw someone get paralyzed.

[–]jcypher 2 points3 points ago

Horrible. Just horrible.

[–]Its_Phobos 148 points149 points ago

[–]aysurfer 33 points34 points ago

Great way of implying but not having to say, "obviously it was the Black guy".

[–]Its_Phobos 15 points16 points ago

No, it was never that. I just saw that he, in the process of trying to make his mistake better, screwed everything up that much more. So yes the first thing it brought to mind was a well known meme featuring a black guy screwing up pretty royally. In no way did I say or even imply that he fucked up because he was black.

[–]coolstorybroham 2 points3 points ago

That guy was Indian.

[–]lopo4 4 points5 points ago

[–]Amyler 5 points6 points ago

I've watched this loop at least a dozen times now, yet I still audibly groan in empathy pain when he hits. That looks excruciating.

[–]dibbledabbledobble 13 points14 points ago

Cant keep those abs when you're crippled.

[–]TheExter 13 points14 points ago

i need the youtube link!!! i need to hear his back breaking

FOUND

[–]paulduve 41 points42 points ago

Oh god. Come on guys, why don't you label stuff like this? Is this hi-larious, or is it someone getting seriously hurt?

There's a difference, and some people find stuff like this to be disturbing. It's just basic courtesy to give a heads-up when posting something like this.

[–]MrSyster 17 points18 points ago

The most primitive form of humor: watching people get hurt or killed. One step more evolved humor: putting people down or throwing shit. Next more evolved: semantic humor, puns, double meanings and mental AHA puzzles. Next more evolved: reflection on cultural norms. Then there's aesthetic, psychic, mythic and cosmic humor.

[–]mcon87 2 points3 points ago

This should be put in pyramid form. Like the food pyramid of humor.

[–]paulduve 1 point2 points ago

Watching people fall down: universally funny. Watching people get seriously hurt or killed: funny to a subset of humanity.

[–]Fealiks 1 point2 points ago

This isn't true at all, man. To say that it's the most primitive form of humour would suggest that everybody experiences it, but not everyone does. Some people enjoy seeing others get hurt, some people don't enjoy it at all.

Humour is actually derived from the unexpected. The two main "ingredients" to humour are 1. unexpectedness and 2. benignity. That's why this gif gets less funny for some people when they consider that the guy might have broken his back; because the element of benignity is removed.

[–]WiredEarp 0 points1 point ago

Good categorization.

[–]thelightforest 0 points1 point ago

It's like.. it's funny to see people like fall of roofs and stuff due to their own stupidity, or maybe falling off stuff accidentally and getting up afterward, but I'm pretty sure that guy was either paralyzed or dead. Not that funny really. In my opinion at least. It mostly just made my back hurt.

[–]hiredgun79 19 points20 points ago

he died

[–]DarkAncelot 9 points10 points ago

This kills the guy.

[–]2mustange 34 points35 points ago

idk how this is on /r/funny but this isn't very funny

[–]WineForMyMen 1 point2 points ago

Yes it is

[–]oldgamesftw 2 points3 points ago

Friendsh... FATALITY!

[–]Agreatbigbushybeard 2 points3 points ago

The look of pure joy on that poor kids face in the beginning versus the look of pure entertainment on the black kids face. YES.

[–]idma 2 points3 points ago

the amount of "I don't give a shit about your welfare" was off the charts

[–]MackDeeZee 2 points3 points ago

The more I see this the more it just makes me shiver and hurt. How long do you think he was just writhing in pain at the bottom of the pool while they tried to fish him outta there.

[–]koticgood 2 points3 points ago

I hope people realize how horribly that guy got hurt, and that he might have been seriously injured.

And that fucking guy is laughing the entire time even as he tortures him. Not only that, he's the idiot that made the toss fail in the first place, holding on to him after everyone else let go.

[–]the-knife 0 points1 point ago

Goddammit Tyrone, you had one job! Let go of that foot.

[–]pudgylumpkins 4 points5 points ago

I didn't even laugh after first impact, that just looked painful. But when he dropped him, I lost it.

[–]Whoa_Bundy 2 points3 points ago

Wow, I don't know if I'm stating the obvious here but the guy who is holding him upside down underwater is the same guy who held onto him when everyone else let go, thus making him smash his back on the pool.

[–]spunkski 3 points4 points ago

As someone who received 8 stitches in my head because my friends MISSED THE POOL, I clicked dislike on this GIF. Scott and Steve G.. I still hate you.

[–]TimmyFTW 25 points26 points ago

I clicked dislike on this GIF

ಠ_ಠ

[–]GoDawgs34 6 points7 points ago

Downvote ≠ Dislike...

reddiquette

[–]SgtSausage 4 points5 points ago

What world do you live in?

[–]donttrustniggers 1 point2 points ago

Lesson learned.

[–]Frankstg 0 points1 point ago

That's gonna sting in the morning.

[–]AVeryHeavyBurtation -1 points0 points ago

Please post the video next time

[–]WhoFan 0 points1 point ago

I've done this before... do you release on 3, 2, [1]. or after the 1... [0]

[–]Kwyjiboy 0 points1 point ago

Was the guy scared that he couldn't swim?

[–]shadybrainfarm 1 point2 points ago

Seriously why the fuck did he go back and grab his legs? It was pretty bad already, but WHY? So much rage.

[–]e3m88 1 point2 points ago

Batman everywhere

[–]Jimmy_Big_Nuts 0 points1 point ago

Now throw him in the hole while Gotham is destroyed!!!!

[–]BlackOxen 1 point2 points ago

NSFL that...Hurts me just watching it.

[–]killamotherfucker 0 points1 point ago

fucking gravity...

[–]RandomPerson200 0 points1 point ago

The guy that dropped him looks like some creepy white-but-has-super-black-skin kinda guy. Sort of like the what the fuck shit is this kinda shit.

[–]Mrkiruru 0 points1 point ago

he almost got him out, oh wait no..

[–]Nanrbananr 0 points1 point ago

I should not have laughed that hard...

[–]megangir 0 points1 point ago

That looks really painful. I didn't even start laughing till the end when the other guy's hands slipped and he fell in. I hope he was ok though

[–]ilikili 1 point2 points ago

The medical professional in me cringed.

[–]Totally_a_Banana 0 points1 point ago

Funny?? Fucking ouch!

[–]LoLmaonade7 0 points1 point ago

That guy, on the far left, that came out of nowhere.. He, he fucked everything up..

[–]tox1c 0 points1 point ago

My older brother and his friend did this exact thing to me once. Hurts like you would not BELIEVE!

[–]JawnF 0 points1 point ago

I... I'm gonna bet he died...

[–]KellBell- 0 points1 point ago

Shit, the same thing happened at a party I was at a few years ago 'cept the kid was dropped right on his spine so his head hit the side too. He was sore, but surprisingly okay...

[–]PapaRomeoWhiskey 1 point2 points ago

Lifeguard's worst nightmare.

[–]DupaZupa 1 point2 points ago

I am not new to the internets. I have seen many awful things that are found within. This is by far the hardest of all of them to watch. This belongs in r/WTF.

[–]D00mFighteR -1 points0 points ago

You obviously have never visited r/spacedicks

[–]youngjheezy 0 points1 point ago

TYRONE!! GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!

[–]A_UPS_DUDE 1 point2 points ago

Get it together Tyrone!

[–]Bahkrah 0 points1 point ago

Pulls you out just to throw you back in

[–]heimdal77 0 points1 point ago

Ahh he didn't really need that spine anyways.

[–]Lazerus42 0 points1 point ago

Damnet Tyrone

[–]CayugaRed 0 points1 point ago

Anyone else think of waterboarding?

[–]careeds3PO 0 points1 point ago

I really hate that guy. He obviously can't count to 3.

[–]AcousticWalrus 0 points1 point ago

If you look at the guy the whole time it makes no sense at all. It looks like he just held on to him for no reason.

[–]KatLikeAKat 0 points1 point ago

And none of them know first aid

[–]dropcode 0 points1 point ago

YOU SAID ON GO! I SAID ON THREE!

[–]AndyKunze 0 points1 point ago

I had this exact thing happen to me once at a birthday party. There was a concrete lip overhanging the water.

It was like being assaulted by a cheese grater... worst birthday ever. :(

[–]kcdakrt 0 points1 point ago

As a person who has suffered form a broken spine, this shit makes me cringe!

[–]INTELLECTUAL_BUKKAKE 1 point2 points ago

Shit. He probably got some water in his nose.

[–]FriendlyBob 0 points1 point ago

YOU MOTHER FUCKERS.

[–]nomnomnomrarr 0 points1 point ago

waterboarding...you're doing it wrong

[–]fortaleza1999 0 points1 point ago

[–]philanderopist 0 points1 point ago

Where's the gif of the burial? I'm sure that didn't go off without a hitch.

[–]uhbijnokm 0 points1 point ago

Ahh! I've been in that exact situation. I let go of the girl and her idiot friend held onto her feet. The awesome logic was that we were just teasing the victim, but throwing her (a girl in a bathing suit at a pool) in the water would be mean...

[–]dafuqdidIwrite 1 point2 points ago

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand.... PARALYSIS!

[–]EvoEpitaph 0 points1 point ago

Is that how kids make friends these days?

[–]eldergoose4L 0 points1 point ago

at least he tried...

[–]Vanilla_Dreams 0 points1 point ago

Why didn't that asshole let go the first time?

[–]Balabol 0 points1 point ago

I would beat the living shit out of that stupid fuck on the right.

[–]alfdog5755 0 points1 point ago

Drops him on the curb and then half drowns him. x2 hit!

[–]MetalJunkie101 1 point2 points ago

That hurt to watch. After having fractured my T12 vertebrae, seeing shit like this is more painful than it used to be.

[–]PhillyCheeseBlunt 0 points1 point ago

This happened to me, except it was my birthday, I was at Boy Scout camp on Catalina Island, and I was thrown off a dock into the ocean and slammed the inside of my knees onto the edge of the dock.

[–]LoveReddit2Bits 1 point2 points ago

Damn, that was painful to watch!

[–]kittenkites 0 points1 point ago

Side splitting.

[–]LincolnHox 1 point2 points ago

Bane as a kid

[–]yoyosarefun 0 points1 point ago

Looks like a hate crime to me...

[–]aedoss 0 points1 point ago

Is he OK?

[–]anxhelino1234 0 points1 point ago

"no, dont, stop pu...no hes...ugh"

[–]kaytea15 0 points1 point ago

I watched this too many times. I can't stop laughing.

[–]MelchKnowsBest 0 points1 point ago

I already saw this on Tosh.O!

[–]Mobius01010 0 points1 point ago

Y U NO LET GO?

[–]Mrmentortv1 0 points1 point ago

My brother and friend did this thing to me

[–]Rescuedmike 0 points1 point ago

at first i thought it was a failed throw then i saw the black guy and he tried to hold him upside down but it flipped him and that's what made him hit his back on the side.