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43
44

How does this happen?! (imgur.com)

submitted ago by [deleted]

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[–]Cthulhuhoop 39 points40 points ago

I have this. It's called Fissured Tongue. It's genetic and is painless/harmless.

Edit: I've had two days of replies ammounting to "huh huh scrotal tongue". So if you're come here to post something similar, don't bother. You are too late to the party.

[–]clever_gun_name 108 points109 points ago

Its from eating a whole box of Sour Patch Kids

[–]CrackpotGonzo 18 points19 points ago

Thanks mom.

[–]Shilo59 9 points10 points ago

Or Sour Skittles.

[–]Parachrom 1 point2 points ago

Or Sour Cats

[–]GoochMcScrotes 1 point2 points ago

Do you have a tongue made of satin? Those things are barely sour

[–]Shilo59 6 points7 points ago

It's the texture not the sourness.

[–]GoochMcScrotes 3 points4 points ago

Whaaaat I love the texture. Cap'n Crunch fucks my mouth up

[–]Shilo59 10 points11 points ago

It all depends on how you eat it. I tend to kinda rub them around with my tongue (that's what she said). Cap'n Crunch on the other hand is made out of fucking razor blades.

[–]GoochMcScrotes 6 points7 points ago

That's how I'd put those little balls of sour in my mouth. And yes, I've learned not to eat Cap'n Crunch until it's semi-soggy. Like an old man's wiener.

[–]lschmidt814 0 points1 point ago

I never liked milk to I've always eaten my cereal dry. Captain crunch is worse than most cereals but my mouth doesn't feel that bad after eating it. I don't know what everyone is bitching about

[–]karwrek 0 points1 point ago

You're not alone

[–]brutalbronco -1 points0 points ago

Try Cap'n Crunch with pork rinds, it awesome.

[–]zerpderp 1 point2 points ago

I thought you said "Tongue made of satan." My bad.

[–]lschmidt814 1 point2 points ago

It's not about the sour. Something in them destroys my tongue.

[–]Overanunderwood 6 points7 points ago

I was going to say a few bags of warheads.

[–]TragicOne 1 point2 points ago

How about warheads?

[–]IBEATUPKIDS -1 points0 points ago

Came here to say this. Have an upvote.

[–]FoxBattalion79 31 points32 points ago

from that same wiki page: "also known as "scrotal tongue""

[–]QWOPtain 0 points1 point ago

One blowjob too many?

[–]Infinity_Flounder 0 points1 point ago

But if you think about it that way, it sounds painful to have a scrotum...

[–]oohchild 2 points3 points ago

I have a friend who has this. I always wondered, has anyone ever told you your tongue feels different when they kiss you?

[–]CalmSpider 1 point2 points ago

You know, there is a way you could find out...

[–]oohchild 0 points1 point ago

Well, he's married, and somehow I don't think his wife would appreciate that. ;P

[–]superfahd 1 point2 points ago

You know, there is a way you could find out...

[–]QWOPtain 1 point2 points ago

It's not gay in a three-way...

[–]monacle_man 0 points1 point ago

or you could just ask his wife? or get him to?

CRAZY!

[–]somanynuggets 0 points1 point ago

Not that I know, as someone who has this

[–]sixsixsixpack 4 points5 points ago

Scrotal tongue. Heh heh.

[–]Stringfellow_HaWk 0 points1 point ago

whats it like kissing with tongue?

[–]grizzlywhere 0 points1 point ago

"Scrotal tongue." Edit: And then I realized I was completely unoriginal.

[–]Phaquebzech 0 points1 point ago

Well that pretty much completely contradicts whyd_you_kill_doakes.

Which is it?

[–]Phaquebzech 10 points11 points ago

NOTE TO SELF:

NEVER DO A GOOGLE IMAGE SEARCH FOR ANYTHING WITH THE WORD "TONGUE" EVER AGAIN.

[–]Cthulhuhoop 2 points3 points ago

These are geographic tongue.

Other than getting teased about it in high school, I'd never given it much thought until a pregnant friend mentioned she had it also and wondered if it'd get passed along.

[–]the4ester 0 points1 point ago

These images made me immediately brush/scrape my tongue

[–]Parachrom -4 points-3 points ago

It's also called "scrotal tongue", hahaha!

[–]a13x33 -3 points-2 points ago

Also called "scrotal tongue"......

[–]ballpressure -1 points0 points ago

i have this as well, also with symptoms of geographic tongue. mine was actually quite uncomfortable/painful when it started developing but doesn't bother me anymore

[–]phillywillydingdong -1 points0 points ago

i also have

[–]MasterShredder -4 points-3 points ago

i'm sorry, don't you mean scrotal tongue? that's just what i've always heard it called.

edit: lol i just saw that name in the wikipedia entry. hate if you must.

[–]applejuicey -5 points-4 points ago

Also known as "scrotal tongue".

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Static_Prevails 2 points3 points ago

I gagged

[–]JUSTLETMEREDDITAAAAH -3 points-2 points ago

Lol "scrotal toungue".

[–]CtrlC_plus_CtrlV 24 points25 points ago

there is not nearly enough internet between me and that

[–]2ndOldTopComment 3 points4 points ago

French kiss the shit outta that

[–]3rdOldTopComment 14 points15 points ago

Actually... My fiancee got a tongue like that, and you can't really feel it while kissing. (And, no... as answer on the upcoming question)

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]1sttymeredditguy 3 points4 points ago

hahahaha

[–]alphanovember 4 points5 points ago

Guys, look at these two posts' usernames.

[–]warbeagle 0 points1 point ago

yeah, what's up with that?

[–]Flopsey 0 points1 point ago

Wait, as for the second part, are you a guy or a girl?

[–]thatjustwas 11 points12 points ago

How much Captain Crunch did you eat?

[–]Soluopon 5 points6 points ago

It's also called scrotal tongue...tough break.

[–]n1876x 7 points8 points ago

WTF'ed outloud.

[–]likethesea 2 points3 points ago

yeah me too

[–]chucKing 4 points5 points ago

Too many Sour Warheads?

[–]happytime1711 2 points3 points ago

Warheads are the shit.

[–]Infinity_Flounder 0 points1 point ago

more people need to know about warheads...im from the uk and i seem to know of them more, and i cant even get them here.

[–]iEatBluePlayDoh 2 points3 points ago

They ate too many shockers.

[–]Ovedya2011 2 points3 points ago

Aaahhhhhhh! Jesus, man, put that back in your mouth.

[–]whyd_you_kill_doakes 13 points14 points ago

i have this. it's a deficiency of one of the B vitamins. google "Map Tongue" or "Geography tongue". a lot of times it's accompanied with white lines/splotches on the tongue. mine isn't nearly as bad as it used to be but still noticeable. on the bright side, it's really fun to show kids that I can "cough up my brain"

[–]n1876x 7 points8 points ago

Do you get food stuck in there?

[–]Jackal_6 6 points7 points ago

Geographic tongue is different from fissured tongue. This is fissured tongue.

[–]NottaGrammerNasi 1 point2 points ago

Thank you for giving me "geographic tongue" to google. I did an image search and I have a present for you. Here ya go.

[–]flantaclause 1 point2 points ago

oh god, why did I click that??

[–]Mackey4506 2 points3 points ago

"You owe me a Michelin, muthafucka."

[–]IAmTheGingaNinja 5 points6 points ago

I didn't mean to kill doakes I swear

[–]BayHarbourButcher 11 points12 points ago

I did.

[–]Insertwords 0 points1 point ago

I have it as well, but I never thought of the "cough up my brain" thing. I can't wait for the next family reunion now.

[–]glitchius 1 point2 points ago

looks like geographical tongue, or tongue fissures.

eww.

[–]delissious 1 point2 points ago

My brother has something that looks like this. Says he got it from eating right after the dentist pulled a couple teeth.

[–]Thatswhatshesaid3909 1 point2 points ago

He lied ..... Obviously from the top comment he was born with it

[–]IAmTheGingaNinja 0 points1 point ago

Maybe he was trying to keep him from disobeying the dentist?

[–]dcmasta 1 point2 points ago

Looks like someone took a Jaccard meat tenderizer to that thing.

[–]monofonik 2 points3 points ago

salt and vinegar chips

[–]IStayDTF 1 point2 points ago

I dont like thiiis!

[–]haleybaley 2 points3 points ago

Too many War heads

[–]Jobobo21 1 point2 points ago

That must feel weird also.

[–]IAmTheGingaNinja 3 points4 points ago

Seems like it'd be painful to drink and eat

Imagine the air flowing through the cracks while breathing >.>

[–]behswag -2 points-1 points ago

I wonder if it feels weird to make out with that... shudders

[–]straitodenim 1 point2 points ago

I get it from citrus.

[–]kingofhell696 1 point2 points ago

see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geographic_tongue, i have this too

[–]syopalevii 3 points4 points ago

I had once a nightmare that this happened to the tip of my penis.

[–]flantaclause 0 points1 point ago

Thanks for that...

Sincerely,

-everyone who will have this dream tonight

[–]Simi566 0 points1 point ago

Just thought of this, it must be awesome to eat icecream from an icecream cone with a Fissured Tongue :P

[–]Thatswhatshesaid3909 0 points1 point ago

I don't know but this should be an add for crack cocaine addiction

[–]qwertyhydro 0 points1 point ago

Anyone else want to eat watermelon now?

[–]Clay_Statue 0 points1 point ago

Must have been a flavor explosion.

[–]Langorian 0 points1 point ago

At least she has nice lips.

[–]Itastepaint 1 point2 points ago

I have this too! It's called "Geographic Tongue" as well.

[–]Pocketzest 1 point2 points ago

Geographic tongue.

[–]Drpackman5000 0 points1 point ago

i think he tried to eat a scalpel.

[–]bluepen9 0 points1 point ago

I thought I was the only one!!!!!!

[–]hakunamatata12345 0 points1 point ago

Kiss me!!

[–]ichalz 0 points1 point ago

Jawbreakers. /discussion

[–]Itastepaint -1 points0 points ago

Also, lol, it's calls "Scrotal Tongue". Lololol.

[–]NancyGracesTesticles -1 points0 points ago

Fungal infection or thrush?

[–]A_Rabid_Sharpie -1 points0 points ago

It's called fissured tongue, and this is a repost.

[–]DonkeyDickDoak -2 points-1 points ago

Too much sodium or acids. Lack of vitamins contributes.

[–]RedditorVincent314 -1 points0 points ago

This is a repost.

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