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all 128 comments

[–]SoloStoffe 215 points216 points ago

It looks really photoshopped, or maybe that was intentional.

[–]Khuskan 57 points58 points ago

Unless durex is a sponsor for the Olympics, which seems weird as a lot of their products seem geared to make you come last.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points ago

when did businessweek start putting a tl;dr at the bottom of their articles?

[–]Scumbag_Rioter 21 points22 points ago

The executive summary, the original tl;dr

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Capt_Underpants 2 points3 points ago

I did it before it was cool.

[–]amyfarrahfowlerphd 1 point2 points ago

The first paragraph of any article (in newspapers, at least) is your TL;DR. Long live print!

[–]albenesi -1 points0 points ago

This would absolutely ruin those condoms.

[–]OzymandiasReborn 4 points5 points ago

Judging by the number of condoms they go through in Olympic Village, I'm not quite sure about that statement...

http://www.cbc.ca/olympics/blogs/postblog/2010/02/emergency-shipment-of-condoms-headed-to-olympic-athletes.html

[–]yallwantsomepancakes 1 point2 points ago

So naturally, the Canadian Foundation for AIDS research decided to step and make sure there were no hitches in Olympic action.

HEY-OH!

[–]ApologiesForThisPost 6 points7 points ago

Would make more sense than Cadbury Chocolate and McDonalds. At least Sex is good exercise.

[–]bigballer_status 2 points3 points ago

Right! Heck, Budweiser is an Olympic sponsor.

[–]k1p3r 2 points3 points ago

at least they aren't saying you can only drink budweiser. Visa have a partnership with LOCOG so you can only use a visa card or cash

[–]Ionlywanttoinsultyou 0 points1 point ago

Has anybody else noticed that kief can increase your duration by 2-3 times?

[–]JackNightmare 102 points103 points ago

Not to be cliche, but you really can tell from the pixels.

[–]Kaghuros 57 points58 points ago

In this you mean ugly-ass jpeg artifacts.

[–]JohnTrollvolta 94 points95 points ago

Usain it's not real?

[–]ilikecommunitylots 17 points18 points ago

Ono, that's awful!

[–]Csheroe 4 points5 points ago

and seeing quite a few shops in my time...

[–]apx7000 2 points3 points ago

No way it's real; the IOC would sue the shit out of them in a heartbeat...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

So white!

[–]Fabrelol 1 point2 points ago

I think it is, for a start i'm sure you can't use a representation of the rings.

[–]rasmus9311 -1 points0 points ago

But Durex have some pretty different advertisements than usual, if those that I have seen aren't photoshopped.

[–]terriblehuman 53 points54 points ago

never use condoms that say they'll make you last longer, they numb the shit out of your dick.

[–]rjcarr 33 points34 points ago

don't they all?

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points ago

Yes, but Benzocaine condoms are on another level.

[–]TiniestDikDik 1 point2 points ago

That exists? I guess it's in "good head" sprays but on condoms too? I think that I need to go into the sex toy business. Simple ideas= lots of monies.

[–]Arduinna 1 point2 points ago

It's in some oral sex sprays/gels (they're mostly gels now because they stay longer and are meant to numb the giver's throat and evidently offer flavor entertainment as well) but it's not in the majority. The majority are just flavored gels. (such as the one actually named Good Head) It's in condoms and anything that claims it can make you last longer. Anything. Also, should be noted: Anal-Eze contains numbing agents. (and is one of the worst things you could ever use for anal anyway. numb=BAD) I'm in the sex toy business (selling them anyway) and you're right, simple ideas are the best ones. Liberator furniture basically created giant cheese wedge mats (like the kind used for gymnastics classes for small kids) and they make a killing on them as "sex furniture". Genius. Absolute genius.

[–]real_nice_guy 9 points10 points ago

yeah, just sprinkle some coke on there instead.

[–]dedatos -1 points0 points ago

whaaatttt?

[–]real_nice_guy 11 points12 points ago

YOU HEARD ME, SPRINKLE SOME COKE ON THAT BITCH

[–]that_physics_guy 7 points8 points ago

Isn't that the point though? Numb dick = longer sex because it doesn't feel as good.

[–]raptormeat 7 points8 points ago

There's a limit, friend.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Bacon_Hero 4 points5 points ago

If you got sodomized by a cattle prod I would be less than dissapointed

[–]ZebracurtainZ 0 points1 point ago

I've never wondered what the deleted comment was so much in my life.

[–]Bacon_Hero 1 point2 points ago

Honestly it was nothing of value. Just random Internet jargon with a bunch of shorthand and capitalized letters mashed together. Pretty much looked like he was trying I be funny and imitate a 12 year old on Facebook who has to type with his toes

[–]dr_dickhead 0 points1 point ago

K wtf is this shit. Even if you didn't type like a fuckin chump you're insult wasn't even clever.

[–]TheFatGuyStrangler 24 points25 points ago

I always want to come in second place, but I always beat myself.

[–]oldcat 49 points50 points ago

Funny but not real, anyone who even tries to put up something vaguely resembling the Olympic logo now gets threatened by the police/private security in the UK, unless they gave the IOC a thick wad of cash first that is...

[–]249ba36000029bbe9749 5 points6 points ago

Plus, the Olympic committee probably wouldn't even accept a condom manufacturer as a sponsor and risk having some countries bail out in protest.

[–]projectFT 4 points5 points ago

Like the Vatican...You know, if sodomizing boys or casting out imaginary demons were an Olympic sport.

[–]Chris866 5 points6 points ago

Edgy, man

[–]EscoBeast 80 points81 points ago

[–]Mattagascar 4 points5 points ago

The artifacts hide the lack of photoshop ability though!

[–]RockDirtRock 37 points38 points ago

They're Jusain

[–]VTJP 7 points8 points ago

The Olympics are apparently a gigantic athlete orgy for those who don't know.

[–]bodangly 4 points5 points ago

It is likely a shop. The IOC is VERY protective of the Olympic logo.

See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_of_the_Five_Rings#International_Olympic_Committee

At least in the US, you can't have 5 interlocking rings in any fashion in an advertisement.

[–]wOlfLisK 7 points8 points ago

Hey, you said Olympic! Do you want to be sued?

[–]Geranyl 1 point2 points ago

Not to mention the image has .jpg artifacts surrounding every element of the ad (the condoms, the logo, the text at the bottom all have a pixely buffer of gray around them).

Aaand it's that awful bright white. Like #FFFFFF bright.

[–]mchengl 0 points1 point ago

is that why Audi only has 4?

[–]ominoustoad 9 points10 points ago

[–]whitestar11 3 points4 points ago

seems appropriate http://i.imgur.com/NP7Y1.jpg

[–]Alatorr 6 points7 points ago

I'm always coming in a little behind.

[–]razorirr 4 points5 points ago

So was Joe Paterno

[–]ukiyoe 0 points1 point ago

A little? You're doing alright then.

[–]danamontana 2 points3 points ago

This ad is for the Fauxlympics-- testing what advertisers can and cannot do in advertising for the Olympics http://www.thedrum.co.uk/news/2012/07/26/first-six-entries-fauxlympics-revealed

[–]TheBrownLion 1 point2 points ago

Durex has the best ads of any condom company and yet in the back of my head I question their quality

[–]roflmuffin 1 point2 points ago

Reminds me of this picture from Swanston Street, Melbourne.

Credit to andrewinmelbourne for the submission to r/australia

[–]talkstomuch 1 point2 points ago

Hammersmith!

[–]JMQuill 0 points1 point ago

I thought that too is it really there?

[–]talkstomuch 0 points1 point ago

used to work at hammersmith grove, looks just like it to me :-)

[–]IMONBATHSALTSNIGGA 1 point2 points ago

Real or not, it really boggles my mind that people would choose to use a condom designed even more than a regular condom to prevent sensation. Putting on a regular condom is like putting a winter glove on your dick; I can't feel shit even in the "ultra thin" varieties.

[–]THE_IRISHMAN_35 1 point2 points ago

Psh. Thats what you think. Sex is a race to orgasm and i have never been beatin.

[–]I_am_not_angry 9 points10 points ago

I believe this from Durex.. they don't seam to give many fucks when it comes to advertising.

[–]bro_b1_kenobi 6 points7 points ago

Oh, they give a lot of fucks...A LOT.

[–]analog_guy 21 points22 points ago

What gave it away? Was it the Durex logo on the billboard?

[–]I_am_not_angry 13 points14 points ago

Top comment says it looks Photoshoped.. i was just saying i thought it was real.

[–]bodanville 1 point2 points ago

0o0oh sounds dirty

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

A condom that makes you last even longer? I find it baffling that some chaps struggle to last with a normal condom on, seriously, even featherlight ones are like wrapping your dick in lead.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

[–]yourpenisinmyhand 2 points3 points ago

EnDur(ex)ance

Edit: haters

[–]1littleindian 0 points1 point ago

someones gotta supply the protection for the athletes no ?

[–]moon_rawrr 0 points1 point ago

Remember, sex is a marathon, not a sprint.

[–]llamanuggets 0 points1 point ago

I think they took him out of context here...

[–]swordfishtrombonist 0 points1 point ago

These Performa "last longer" bullshit condoms are so fucking awful, really. They've got some kind of lotion that will numb the feeling in your wang. Sure you'll last longer but it won't be any fun, you won't get any pleasure from it and it stings a little bit. Just awful, don't ever buy this.

[–]Ancaeus 0 points1 point ago

Buy them, just make sure to wear them inside out for a laugh.

[–]Jeroknite 0 points1 point ago

Those are some terrible JPEG artifacts inside those circles.

... Oh, they're condoms. That makes more sense.

[–]Grimmy616 0 points1 point ago

What are Usain?

[–]VickysAsleep 0 points1 point ago

Clever, veeeeery clever

[–]Takes_it_in_the_face 0 points1 point ago

If ya know what I mean...

[–]Phoequinox 0 points1 point ago

Ah, Europe. Where sex isn't condemned by the righteous flames of fanatical doctrine.

Edit: I say something moderately cool, and it turns out I didn't look at the image long enough. But my statement remains!

[–]Tjgisgreat11 0 points1 point ago

Now that's advertising !

[–]Koldfuzion 0 points1 point ago

The Germans have pro-protection public service billboards like this. Made me double-take when I first saw one.

http://www.machsmit.de/kampagne/historie.php

[–]Teemo_Commander 0 points1 point ago

Plug for /r/adporn

[–]anti_karmatic 0 points1 point ago

That's BowlShit!

[–]ArcticSpaceman 0 points1 point ago

Tommy Wiseau, is that you?

[–]uncannyDINOZORD 0 points1 point ago

I read this as "You sayin not every man wants to be the fastest in the world?"

[–]nsears14 0 points1 point ago

well no girl wants to be late either...

[–]a_virginian 0 points1 point ago

I wonder how many athletes get pregnant while at the Olympics. I wonder what the running total is from all Olympics.

[–]JacobGalindo 0 points1 point ago

Usain will always finish first

[–]thealphamale44 0 points1 point ago

It took me a moment.

[–]THEhillsHAVEaids 0 points1 point ago

At first I thought it to be a simple Olympic advertisement. Then BAM I say the condoms.

[–]2ollux 0 points1 point ago

This just seems unnecessarily lewd.

[–]frieda1983 0 points1 point ago

I would hope this is not photoshopped because it's a pretty awesome billboard.

[–]kewlfocus 0 points1 point ago

Wow, if you're going to shop something at least make sure you didn't accidentally leave a white brush spot on the image.

[–]wolvmatt 0 points1 point ago

Why would you want a condom that claims to make you last longer? Wouldn't that just mean you couldn't feel anything?

[–]jambi1987 0 points1 point ago

Let me translate the advertisement - "Condoms: For when you have all day"

[–]MagicalLlama 0 points1 point ago

As a Japanese person, I am always surprised that they advertise condoms so much in America. WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN?!

[–]hawthorneluke 1 point2 points ago

Obviously they don't want them.

Also, could turn out rather bad treating condom's as if they're something not to be spoken of.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points ago

I can't condom this advertising.

[–]Mr_Rippe -1 points0 points ago

I have my PhD in 'Shoppology and I'm a professional 'Shopologist, so I am highly qualified to say that this is, without a shadow of a doubt, 'shopped.

[–]Bartlet4America -1 points0 points ago

If this is legit, then Durex has just further shown that they have some incredible ad people. they continually produce awesome ads.

[–]vxx -2 points-1 points ago

But what can I do to not be it anymore?

[–]Huiii 0 points1 point ago

Well...use the performa-Durex?

[–]Admiral_Turtle -1 points0 points ago

I do.

[–]ChasingShad0ws -1 points0 points ago

For a moment there I thought that was from Limerick!

[–]Ghostcri -1 points0 points ago

Is it just me or does the logo beg to be photoshopped into a human centipede?

[–]TheHairyNostril -1 points0 points ago

For me it's not so much "wants" as it is "I can't help it".

[–]SirNeptune -1 points0 points ago

Why - if I had a dollar for every pixel I'd have 2 nickels! Looks like a shwooooop. BUT THAT'S JUST MY 2 CENTS!

[–]MikomiK -1 points0 points ago

Its so photoshopped it actually hurts me.

[–]youngjheezy -2 points-1 points ago

nice touch with the olympic condoms

[–]HolyShitty -2 points-1 points ago

What's brown and runny? Usain Bolt.

[–]LiveAndLetDiarrhea -2 points-1 points ago

You're such a retarded pussy. Looking at your post history makes me want to autoerotic-asphyxiate myself to death.

[–]PowerCrumpet -3 points-2 points ago

Shoppadyboopadoopashoop!

[–]Aaronmcom -3 points-2 points ago

Not every man, is apparently as good as photoshop as me. Or atleast being able to see the difference between white and offwhite.