this post was submitted on
928 points (64% like it)
2,023 up votes 1,095 down votes

funny

subscribe2,391,930 readers

18,966 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 125 comments

[–]Ruive05 75 points76 points ago

Something's going on with the jaw of the woman in the background - This gif has been altered in some way. This gif never took place in the first place - This gif was an inside job!!

[–]jboyle89 17 points18 points ago

The creator was trying to conserve space by reducing how much is animated. Looks like he/she didn't realize that the lady in back moved beyond the borders they set.

[–]naqutramas -1 points0 points ago

You know that an animated GIF stores each frame independently of the others, with no attempt to conserve space by only storing the changes, right?

[–]redmercuryvendor 6 points7 points ago

Not true, by using variable sized frames (essentially making everything else transparent by only overlaying the 'changed' rectangle) you can save significant space. This is what occurred here.

[–]b0w3n 1 point2 points ago

May have just been the creator trying to freeze the background then?

[–]benhamine 0 points1 point ago

Never the less, it looks like the creator's doing. Watch the tree above her head also.

[–]By_your_command 3 points4 points ago

I think she is a shape-shifting zeta reticulan lizard being from beyond the moon. she's in league with the Freemasons and the Bilderburgers to force national socialist medicine down our throats whilst forcing sharia law on us so as to pave the way for her alien Islamist Commie anchorbabies. Wake-up Sheeple!!! Infowars.com! Ron Paul 2012!

[–]Soup_bones 2 points3 points ago

alex jones is masturbating to this.

[–]SneakyPete27 0 points1 point ago

It's just her reaction when she found out that she too could've had a lifelong lightbulb, if it weren't for the Planned Obsolescence Cartels.

"First you git da money, den you get the power, den you sell de shitty lightbulbs..."

[–]J4Seriously 5 points6 points ago

Same thing happens when I see a reaction gif on /r/funny

[–]teamatreides 8 points9 points ago

While some things are truly absurd, others can seem absurd only because you're missing the truth.

I'm not saying anyone provides substantial evidence, but I'm sure something has to be overlooked occasionally due to associations with fanaticism, the occasional bullshit to cover that detail that actually matters.

[–]BroCop 1 point2 points ago

I imagine it's stupid shit, like a federal agent altering his records so it doesn't show he came in late or the CIA spending money to buy cows for steaks and then not eating them. There's no way the government is anywhere near organized enough to do anything dangerous.

[–]teamatreides 0 points1 point ago

You don't need a whole government to do very horrible things, though.

[–]DrLasagna 0 points1 point ago

People aren't perfect, the things conspiracies lack is credible sources. Are they trying to tell me NO ONE talked about 9/11? Not one person peeped?

[–]thongerrr[S] 14 points15 points ago

I am currently reading about how the Aurora shootings and aliens are related. Deep stuff man.

[–]Philmriss 10 points11 points ago

Link. Right. Now.

[–]thongerrr[S] 1 point2 points ago

[–]Ticklebush 0 points1 point ago

I'm an NSA agent from the future and I can corroborate everything written in that thread. OPEN YOUR MIND FUCKERS!

[–]tidux 0 points1 point ago

[–]splice42 1 point2 points ago

Deep stuff man.

You typed an extra 'e' and omitted the 'r'.

[–]happlepaff -1 points0 points ago

yeesh. I just clicked over and saw a thread about water fluoridation. Essentially, they were saying that fluoride is put into the water to control people's minds, cause alzheimers, and cause cancer. One guy blamed it for teenage suicides.

Tinfoil hates for everybody!

Edit: Tinfoil hats. Maybe. Pick whichever one works for you!

[–]Canadave 8 points9 points ago

"Do you realize that fluoridation of water is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous Communist plot we have ever had to face?"

[–]happlepaff 1 point2 points ago

I think a lot of these people would benefit from watching 'Dr Strangelove'.

[–]chrisc098 0 points1 point ago

Not sure about that. Stanley Kubrick was a conspiracy theorist himself. Some even said he filmed the fake moon landing, which is just silly, but he definitely had that streak.

[–]happlepaff 1 point2 points ago

I don't know about that, but I think the paranoid general neatly skewered the whole 'water fluoridation is a communist plot' thing.

[–]joe100su 2 points3 points ago

I want to suggest "hats" instead for your last line, but somehow this still works.

[–]happlepaff -1 points0 points ago

Ah. That'd be my subconscious sneaking in.

[–]karmacanic 0 points1 point ago

lol...yer..real tin hat stuff..oh wait..whats this a report from harvard no less tin foil hat time!

[–]happlepaff 0 points1 point ago

I'm not denying that fluoridation of water has questionable health effects(alongside several beneficial ones): I'm saying that it doesn't make any sense to claim it can be used for mind control, or to deliberately give people cancer.

[–]plainOldFool 0 points1 point ago

Obligitory

Metal Oxide Salts!

[–]matidaou 2 points3 points ago

i just can't stop looking at that gif man.

[–]WooChop 1 point2 points ago

This is the first I've seen of this kind of gif that contains the full animation of what the person was saying.

[–]bellatron 1 point2 points ago

I only find out about these subreddits from shit like this.

[–]I_am_not_angry 1 point2 points ago

My favorite one is that: tin foil hats are a lie perpetrated on conspiracy theorists by 'Big Tin Foil".

[–]galipso 3 points4 points ago

I wish there was a way I could downvote an entire subreddit.

[–]BTC_micro 3 points4 points ago

I wish I could once again be blissfully ignorant

[–]heygabbagabba 2 points3 points ago

Have a look at /r/911truth , it makes /r/conspiracy look like a kindergarten. Some seriously deluded people in there.

[–]Defcon458 10 points11 points ago

9/11 was fucked, I don't care what you think happened.

[–]topdawg312 5 points6 points ago

yeah, it was a bad time

[–]NewDrekSilver 11 points12 points ago

1500 architects and engineers got together, studied all the evidence, and unanimously concluded that Tower 7 was a controlled demolition. Just watch the video, it's ridiculously obvious.

What does that mean on the larger scale, hell if I know, I'm not even American. But you'd have to be an idiot to ignore the evidence.

[–]boughtitout 0 points1 point ago

[–]Shampyon -1 points0 points ago

How many of them have the relevant expertise?

There's dozens of kinds of engineer after all.

[–]heygabbagabba -3 points-2 points ago

Lol! That's hilarious!

But you'd have to be an idiot to ignore the evidence.

Oh, I agree, entirely!!

[–]shiny_shiny 3 points4 points ago

Most 9/11 truthers have very baseless arguments, I'll give you that. But it does bother me just how quickly the average person dismisses the idea without hesitation. I'm not saying George W. flew the plane into the building himself, but don't you think it's just a tad naive that most people buy the official story without question? I mean, it's the government. They aren't even straightforward about non-secret stuff. What reason have we to assume that the official report was told exactly as it occurred? Is it really so far fetched that our government wasn't totally honest with us? I don't think it is, yet anyone who even suggests a story that deviates from the official report, despite any expertise that gives them authority on the issue, is written off and slandered as a tinfoil hat-clad idiot fool. WTF

[–]ivanmarsh 4 points5 points ago

Considering the report... truth would seem to be something we need more of about 911.

[–]slim_chance 4 points5 points ago

Yeah, they spent more money investigating Slick Willy's blowjob than they did the biggest event of the last 100 years. Just the fact that people are willing to say "The government told me here's what happened," and they buy it no questions asked made me start to question the official story.

I'm not going to march in a "9/11 was an inside job" parade, but I think there are enough questions raised and evidence to point at the fact that there was more to the story than we were told to look into it deeper.

[–]dpistheman 1 point2 points ago

the biggest event of the last 100 years

You don't think the detonation of the atom bomb or the fall of Russian Communism or the lunar landing is a bigger deal than September 11th?

[–]heygabbagabba 0 points1 point ago

I sure there are mountains of secret stuff the government will never tell us, but the official story isn't one of them. As hard to believe some may find the official story, every alternative is simply a hell of a lot more uncredible. Planes hit the buildings; an established, experienced and organized terrorist group claimed the attacks. Nothing with any credibility has ever surfaced that throws any doubt whatsoever over that.

[–]shiny_shiny 1 point2 points ago

True. The lack of acceptance of alternative stories is not what I take issue with; it's the unwillingness to examine the truthfulness of the official story. To me, that is an important distinction. Being suspicious of the report is not the same as believing the president and the taliban gave each other handies every morning.

[–]heygabbagabba 1 point2 points ago

Something that seems to be ignored is that the official report is one of the most scrutinized documents in the history of the country. It's not like everyone just said 'ok, I'll buy it'. Everyone went over it with a fine toothed comb. If there was anything wrong with it in even a minor way, it would have been on every second TV show until it was answered. It may not seem like it, but people like John Stewart (as one of a hundred examples) would like nothing more than to nail the government over something like this.

For me the real reason why truthers discredit themsleves is that are grossly inconsistent. They will argue any tiny detail of the official report for years, but simply will not turn that same focus on their own versions of events. I've seen threads where the guy who says Bush paid Al Qaeda to fly the planes supports the guy who thinks the planes were holograms (true story!) who supports the guy who claims Israel did it who supports the guy who claims the CIA rigged bombs who supports the guy.......etc. Any story is true except the real one. It's ludicrous.

[–]shiny_shiny 1 point2 points ago

Ever heard of the book The Informant? It's a true story based on a real person, Mark Whitaker, who was an executive at ADM. ADM sold products like citric acid and corn syrup, stuff like that is used to make other stuff- stuff that is in nearly every edible consumer product. Long story short, Whitaker became an FBI informant, and helped convict ADM and several other companies for a global price fixing scheme. Executives from all the global producers of lysine (goes into hog feed) met in secret, agreed on prices, and effectively screwed over all consumers. No one saw it coming.

And what about the financial crisis? What about the hedge fund Magnetar buying up boatloads of toxic CDO's, and unbeknownst to their own investors, bet against those very assets? Bankers were making millions while their own banks failed, their own clients lost shit tons of money. No one saw it coming.

I know this is all over the place, but the point is, people will do fucked up things to get ahead, and things happen all the time that were never expected. That is because for every conspiracy, there are people who don't want you to expect it.

When you think of how much money some people are making off of American wars, when you consider how the VP (at the time) himself was making money, when you think about selfish people have proven themselves to be time and time again, you have to wonder if the White House was really as clueless before hand as they claimed to be. You have to wonder if the gov might really have had some motivation to let this happen. You have to wonder about all the ways some people have benefited since. I don't pretend to know what happened, but I don't trust my government and frankly have no reason to.

[–]heygabbagabba 1 point2 points ago

I'm sure you have heard the conspiracies about the cure for cancer, or the oil-less car being made, but the companies have withheld them for economic gain.

The problem with the 9/11 conspiracies and these ones are the same: the money, adulation and fame a person or company would get from curing cancer, or building an oil less car, or proving 9/11 was an inside job would be astronomical compared to what they would get from upholding the conspiracy. If personal gain is the motivation, then you have to consider the personal gain if you broke the truth. Only one guy will ever cure cancer, and the motivation to be that guy is a billion times greater than anything else you could be offered.

[–]shiny_shiny 0 points1 point ago

I see what you mean, but as far as disproving 9/11 goes, and the supposed fame that would ensue...I have one question for you: How? First of all, no one person could single-handedly disprove the official report. Many try; there are a number of experts in their respective fields-architecture, engineering, controlled demolition, pilots, etc-that have attempted to bring attention to the improbablitity of certain aspects of the official report. But what happens? Nothing. It is their word against a million others. They are written off as loony tunes and never given a second thought. Others are apprehensive to come forward and put their own reputations at stake and thus, the silence continues. The risk most certainly outweighs the benefits so as far as that goes:

and the motivation to be that guy is a billion times greater than anything else you could be offered.

I feel you are quite wrong.

[–]heygabbagabba -1 points0 points ago

How?

Proof. If you are in on the conspiracy, you would certainly know how to blow the whistle.

I feel you are quite wrong.

Columbus would agree with me.

[–]shiny_shiny 0 points1 point ago

Think for a minute about what you are saying. Do you seriously think someone in on a conspiracy of that magnitude would benefit from spilling the beans? Considering anyone "in on it" would either need to be military or government, do you really think that a few months in the media spotlight would be more valuable to them than their ruined careers and reputations? More valuable than the fucktons of legal, financial, and political ties that would inevitably be severed? That's not even considering the possibility of legal repercussions and the mountains of scorn from naysayers. Can you imagine the scrutiny, the hatemail...Nobody would do that to themselves, and I wouldn't blame them.

[–]Pway -1 points0 points ago

Everyone is just dying to be Bradley Manning ain't they.

[–]heygabbagabba -1 points0 points ago

Because what Bradley Manning did is some how comparable to what I'm talking about.

Thanks for the contribution, no need to add any more.

[–]Skwerley 0 points1 point ago

YOU'RE A SHILL! hey everyone! This guy is in on it!

[–]thisnotanagram 2 points3 points ago

Actually this guy does seem to make it his mission to attempt to derail many posts of that nature...like he's got a personal vendetta, or some exterior motive.

Just sayin'

[–]rommelcake 3 points4 points ago

COME ON, SHEEPLE!

[–]ivanmarsh 0 points1 point ago

I love her.

[–]Gady_Lala 0 points1 point ago

I want to stick my penis in that

[–]damngravity 0 points1 point ago

You have to sort through like all conspiracy related sites but there is some good discussion going on. Also the theories can be pretty amusing.

[–]6Jonnie6 0 points1 point ago

[–]All_the_rage 0 points1 point ago

The thing with conspiracies is you have to make two very grand assumptions. The first is that the government is organized enough to pull off something so complicated, and the second is that the government can keep this a secret.

[–]runxc77 0 points1 point ago

thank you 200000 times for actually letting her say the whole phrase! i hate it when the people talking only say like two words of the quoted phrase

[–]AGuyReadingThisSite 0 points1 point ago

How is it, followers of each political party believe the other is conspiring to f us all over for their personal gain, but admitting you think conspiracies exist makes you a loon?

Ok, either there IS a conspiracy, or you think both sides are trying to help the country and your side is lying to smear the other side. Conspiring to make the other side look bad?

Aren't ad campaigns often... conspiracies to get you to buy a lesser product?

The Michigan "financial martial law" coup. Not the result of a conspiracy? Still pushing trickle-down, which got us where we are now financially. Not a conspiracy to repeat the Michigan coup nation-wide?

Still, none of this compares to the REAL conspiracy. All this economic crisis is to distract from the fact that... hey, what's that noise... who are you... LET GO OF ME! THE WORLD MUST KNOW THE TRUTH! Elvis was killed for having perfected the waffle to the point that the eater transcended our view of reality and gained superpowers and guaranteed, multiple orgasm! Ha haaaa!!!! The secret's out now, you can't hide it anymore! The truth wants to be free!

[–]ventian -1 points0 points ago

Yea a lot of the people are way out there with reptilians and things. But I find some things hold water. The 9/11 thing mostly. Aurora on the other hand, that was just a fuckin' lunatic. I blame 4chan for that shit.

[–]Lyianx 0 points1 point ago

Whats up with the warping of the time space continuum around her arm?

[–]j-random 4 points5 points ago

Well spotted, citizen! If you'd care to step into this unmarked black van that's just pulled up, we have a small team of experts inside who will explain everything to your satisfaction. Don't mind the black hood -- it's for your protection, not ours.

[–]TwoLegsJoe -1 points0 points ago

THEY want you to think it's a poorly-done cinemagraph!

[–]rbcrusaders 0 points1 point ago

Sheeple ITT

[–]Releasethedreadknot 4 points5 points ago

love this comic

http://xkcd.com/1013/

[–]DamagingExcess 0 points1 point ago

No one takes you serious when you say sheeple. Just sayin

[–]rbcrusaders 0 points1 point ago

good thing i wasn't saying it in an attempt to be serious

[–]DamagingExcess 0 points1 point ago

Good. Let's be friends then. I love you

[–]addicted2amp 0 points1 point ago

source of this gif?

[–]TickleFightProTour 1 point2 points ago

Bridesmaids.

[–]addicted2amp 0 points1 point ago

thank you!

[–]Dovahkiin 0 points1 point ago

tumblr

[–]liljay2k 0 points1 point ago

What movie is this?

[–]ohmyword 1 point2 points ago

brides maids

[–]wolflion 2 points3 points ago

what movie is that?

[–]TwoLegsJoe 2 points3 points ago

The one with the bride's maids.

[–]SneakyPete27 -1 points0 points ago

Is that the one with the bridesmaids, or the bride's maids?

[–]bugbladderbeast 2 points3 points ago

It's the one with the bridesmaids who made a bunch of scenes and the one bridesmaid made the main bridesmaid look bad by stealing the main bridesmaid's ideas. The one bridesmaid even made her maids hand out puppies and such, which made another bridesmaid excited. This all made the main bridesmaid mad, which she made into a thing with the bride. Was that made pretty clear?

[–]SneakyPete27 0 points1 point ago

Ahh that rings a bell now, I think it was called, "The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down".

[–]bugbladderbeast 1 point2 points ago

No, that's Speed. You're thinking of the one where that guy inherits his uncle's fortune and has a black foot.

[–]Mortuseon -1 points0 points ago

But, like, what if OP is posting this to, like, stop us going there and seeing the real shit, man? THERE ARE THINGS THEY DON'T WANT US TO KNOW!

[–]bronyraurstomp 0 points1 point ago

Aw come on, let them have fun on their subreddit.

That's like going to the furries or the ponies and making fun of them... As long as they're doing their crazy stuff within their walls we shouldn't mock them... You can, but why?

[–]Teslanaut -1 points0 points ago

Listen to No Agenda.

[–]Pineappable -3 points-2 points ago

It's sad that some people believe some of the things on there, but if they all ever suddenly stopped talking about this kind of stuff, I'd be scared.

[–]nozeitall -1 points0 points ago

you turn into a blow hard blond with no brains?

[–]joetromboni -5 points-4 points ago

I wonder if HAARP has been linked to aurora