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2780
2781

Worst name ever. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by leghhy

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[–]koolaidface 223 points224 points ago

I found his full name. He was director of the Civil Police in the state of Goiás from 1995 until 1998.

http://www.policiacivil.go.gov.br/hitler-mussoline-domingues-pacheco.html

[–]superwinner 126 points127 points ago

I can't believe you found that, it would be almost impossible to google this guy.

[–]koolaidface 87 points88 points ago

It helps if you speak Portuguese.

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points ago

Was recently at a Portuguese-Italian wedding, I'm convinced it's almost impossible to learn that language

[–]koolaidface 18 points19 points ago

Nah, it's super easy. You learn about 3,000 words and you're good to go. Tenses are not too bad, noun genders are fairly clear. Please note that I'm talking about spoken Brazilian Portuguese. The Portugal variety is somewhat difficult for me to understand.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]koolaidface 9 points10 points ago

I found it easy enough, but I was in total immersion for 3 years. Beautiful language, and yet it can be extremely vulgar in a poetic kind of way. Despite the subject matter, Cidade de Deus cracks me up every time.

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        [–]LoughLife 40 points41 points ago

        I can speak portuguese! Just watch: HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE

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            [–]iparga 5 points6 points ago

            Boa, muleque.

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              [–]drshooter 1103 points1104 points ago

              I've met a few hitlers in my lifetime. I'm from the Dominican Republic, a country that is very far from aryan... but some macho ignorant fathers have no idea what hitler was about...all they know is that bad dude from the war movies, so they name their boys hitler so they'll grow up to be a "badass"... the "Hitlers" I've met are all black.

              [–]stompythebeast 717 points718 points ago

              Im dominican too. And my favorite ones are "Yors Washington" (George Washington", "Tomas Yeferson" (Thomas Jefferson) and "Wiston Shurshil" (Winston Churchill). These names are given as first + middle names, so the full persons name would be "Tomas Yeferson Rodriguez". Its freaking hilarious in my opinion.

              [–]keith_weaver 456 points457 points ago

              Now batting 3rd, playing short stop, Barack Obama Jimenez!

              [–]drshooter 106 points107 points ago

              I met a Kobe Brayan Tiburcio...children's hospital Santiago Dominican rep. No joke

              [–]satanbro69 71 points72 points ago

              my favorites are James Bond Noteno Conquiche & Disney Landia (disneyland) Rodriguez Juarez

              [–]DagNasty 18 points19 points ago

              Yo soy Bond. James Bond

              [–]SunAge88 3 points4 points ago

              Not sure if happy to see Uruguay show up on reddit by these means...

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                  [–]a_stray_bullet 122 points123 points ago

                  Jet Li Chavez!

                  [–]realfunatparties 233 points234 points ago

                  Yet Li Chavez.

                  [–]stompythebeast 18 points19 points ago

                  No joke, there is already a couple hundred of those after 2008. Most of us dominicans identify more with african americans, thus we also went nuts went Barack Obama became president.

                  [–]nicoleisrad 5 points6 points ago

                  And how are they spelling it?

                  [–]DaddyOopOfaTinyTree 10 points11 points ago

                  About a thousand different ways. Some will actually write it correctly "Barack Obama", so will Hispanify it completely: "Barrak Obama". Most will write something in between, and then add their own personal flair: "Baraka Oubama".

                  I have at least one confirmed "Pokemon Hernandez" that I've met. Parents swore up and down that that was his legal name (he was too young to carry a cedula).

                  source: I am Dominican.

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                    [–]CorporateImperialism 34 points35 points ago

                    Dominican shortstop batting 3rd?...Barack obama jimenez sounds like he could be the shit.

                    [–]farcense 17 points18 points ago

                    Chuck Norris Sanchez in the outfield!

                    [–]ahiquisl 130 points131 points ago

                    Spread your legs and prepare for my upvotes.

                    [–]chopbustedfellowadul 158 points159 points ago

                    http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/35bwwm/

                    [–]Kevlar_socks 138 points139 points ago

                    Ahem...

                    Roses are red,

                    violets are blue,

                    PREPARE YOUR ANUS

                    AND MAKE ROOM FOR TWO

                    [–]Parker_I 46 points47 points ago

                    I'm scared.

                    [–]InappropriatelyGay 49 points50 points ago

                    I'm not.

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                      [–]ialsohaveadobro 15 points16 points ago

                      Hardest I've laughed all day.

                      [–]chewieconcarne 10 points11 points ago

                      Liteweight. I'm hard all the time.

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                            [–]ElMandrake 72 points73 points ago

                            Mexican here, there's also Robocops, Batman, Onedollar, Usnavy and Leididiana (Lady Diana) among others.

                            [–]Strangely_Calm 68 points69 points ago

                            Mexican Robocop could be what's needed to restart the franchise!

                            [–]valiyum 6 points7 points ago

                            Makes me think of the six million peso man on robot chicken.

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                              [–]MaziarShahi 36 points37 points ago

                              Onedollar's only regret in life was marrying that chinese salesman, Jimmy Ho.

                              [–]Eurynom0s 21 points22 points ago

                              "I AM BATMAN!"

                              [–]martroal 20 points21 points ago

                              In Venezuela there are 89 people named BATMAN registered to vote.

                              [–]stompythebeast 10 points11 points ago

                              Robocops? You best be kidding! That's hilariously awesome.

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                                [–]accountII 43 points44 points ago

                                I once heard of a girl from Guantanomo (the village) named Us Navy. Apperently her mother had thought she had given her daughter the same name that had been given to a boat. It actually sounded quite cute with the Spanish intonation.

                                [–]stompythebeast 34 points35 points ago

                                It would be something like Ooze-navi. That does sound exotic and nice haha

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                                  [–]thefatalepic 57 points58 points ago

                                  Your fucking kidding me, right? I'm going to name my firstborn Venyamin Franklen Zermeño.

                                  [–]Darthtagnan 26 points27 points ago

                                  Very interesting... and it lends some reasoning to a fellow I used to work with. Though, the guy was not Dominican, but a Filipino from the southern part of the islands. His first name was Zeoncunnyrick... and went by the shortened "Sean"... get it? ...(Sean Connery) His parents loved the actor so much that they named their son after him.

                                  [–]ruSAL[!] 77 points78 points ago

                                  These reminds me of my Costa Rican friend from school who said she knew a couple of people named "Usmail" (U.S. Mail) and "Usnavy" (U.S. Navy).

                                  [–]Shinji_Ikari 55 points56 points ago

                                  In a remote corner of my Centralamerican country, it is common to find given names such as "alka seltzer" and "hijo de verga" (son of dick).

                                  Saludos!

                                  [–]bastian1343 65 points66 points ago

                                  Son Of Dick is probably the most accurately descriptive name you could give anyone's son.

                                  [–]FurryEels 19 points20 points ago

                                  Or Emerged F. Coitus would be pretty accurate

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                                    [–]Strangely_Calm 14 points15 points ago

                                    Now Nick Cage's progeny doesn't sound retarded at all.

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                                      [–]eighthgear 18 points19 points ago

                                      Reminds me of the cargo cults on remote Pacific islands.

                                      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cargo_cult

                                      [–]Blackface420 5 points6 points ago

                                      How are they pronounced? Like U-S-Mail or all one word?

                                      [–]stompythebeast 4 points5 points ago

                                      Something like 'Ooze-ma-il'. It doesnt sound bad at all when pronounced with spanish connotations.

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                                          [–]newtype2099 57 points58 points ago

                                          whats yours? Abraham Lincoln Chavez?

                                          [–]spandeflex 74 points75 points ago

                                          Chuck Norris Nuñez

                                          [–]WONT_CAPITALIZE_i 37 points38 points ago

                                          Liwl Dwayne Perez

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                                            [–]stompythebeast 14 points15 points ago

                                            No. Mi nombre es Bob Marli Peña. Mucho gusto.

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                                              [–]im_tyler_durden 9 points10 points ago

                                              Jim Morrison Varela

                                              [–]MacaroniMidler 5 points6 points ago

                                              It's pronounced Yim!

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                                                [–]MattHeavi 20 points21 points ago

                                                http://i.imgur.com/RR7we.gif

                                                [–]RaleighDelk 20 points21 points ago

                                                Those names sound like they're just out of Just Cause.

                                                [–]Muub 8 points9 points ago

                                                There is something "similar" in countries that use to be french colonies, locals look up names in the calendar to find French sounding names for their kids, so you end up with people called Toussaint (all saints) and fetnat (short for fete nationale, national day). Also my father, who is a doctor, told me that mothers sometimes ask doctors (presumably french) for french sounding names, and you end up with kids named syphillis, etc... fun stuff!

                                                [–]leftwing_rightist 4 points5 points ago

                                                "im here to register for a passport" "name?" "syphillis"

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                                                  [–]JimmyJamesincorp 16 points17 points ago

                                                  There are people from South America who name their kid Usnavy, after the ship their fathers came from. (US-NAVY)

                                                  [–]_it_was_me 11 points12 points ago

                                                  To be fair, Thomas Jefferson actually does have quite a few black people in his own family tree...

                                                  [–]eighthgear 4 points5 points ago

                                                  Kids named after Churchill and Jefferson? That's badass.

                                                  [–]Harimasu-ita 4 points5 points ago

                                                  Oh Lord, good to know it's not just a Venezuelan thing...

                                                  [–]MastaofDisasta 6 points7 points ago

                                                  Bruce Lee El Nino

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                                                    [–]sirmuskrat 1148 points1149 points ago

                                                    the "Hitlers" I've met are all black.

                                                    That's ok. Even the real hitler didn't match up to his own aryan ideals, with his decidedly non-blonde hair and beady non-blue eyes.

                                                    The lesson is that as long as you have enough unbridled irrational hate in your heart, you too can be hitler. Don't ever let anyone tell you different.

                                                    Edit: I'm being told repeatedly (both in this thread and via, let's say, "passionate" pm's) that Hitler did indeed have blue eyes. I readily admit my mistake. All I can do now is hope my misstatement of this fact hasn't irrevocably tainted your views on the late fuhrer.

                                                    [–]Roflkopt3r 171 points172 points ago

                                                    There is a saying in Germany to summarize the "aryans":

                                                    "blond as Hitler, tall as Göbbels, slim as Göring"

                                                    Another version includes "chaste as Röhm" (pretty openly homosexual and 'highly sexually active' leader of the SA).

                                                    [–]SatyrMex 36 points37 points ago

                                                    Thats brilliant.

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                                                      [–]IIdsandsII 687 points688 points ago

                                                      that's inspirational as fuck

                                                      [–]TheAtomicPlayboy 593 points594 points ago

                                                      I'm Hitler, and so can you.

                                                      [–]BoonTobias 137 points138 points ago

                                                      If you have hate in your heart, let it out

                                                      [–]TheAtomicPlayboy 560 points561 points ago

                                                      "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best."

                                                      - Adolf Hitler

                                                      [–]MysticKirby 782 points783 points ago

                                                      YOLOCAUST

                                                      [–]McWut 171 points172 points ago

                                                      How do you think Hitler managed to seize power in 1933? His speeches had mad swag

                                                      [–]caveman_rejoice 101 points102 points ago

                                                      Who needs Jews when you have swag.

                                                      [–]SnuggieMcGee 17 points18 points ago

                                                      Related

                                                      You are all so very welcome.

                                                      [–]thenewiBall 3 points4 points ago

                                                      Good God that was beautiful

                                                      [–]GOONY14 20 points21 points ago

                                                      **Source

                                                      I say H-I-T-L-E-R

                                                      [–]sreddit 20 points21 points ago

                                                      M-O-U-S-E?

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                                                          [–]lostNcontent 9 points10 points ago

                                                          Ridin' round town in my fancy car...

                                                          [–]2stanky[!] 4 points5 points ago

                                                          You are perfect in every way

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                                                            [–]PirateGriffin 71 points72 points ago

                                                            Can't handle me at my wurst

                                                            EDIT: Corrected for spelling Na... never mind.

                                                            [–]NancyGracesTesticles 34 points35 points ago

                                                            Can't handle my wurst.

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                                                                  [–]sleetx 13 points14 points ago

                                                                  http://i.imgur.com/6VkBb.gif

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                                                                    [–]Humble_Link_Guy 56 points57 points ago

                                                                    standing ovation

                                                                    [–]tankosaurus 18 points19 points ago

                                                                    Those not standing at the front were shot instantly.

                                                                    [–]Humble_Link_Guy 51 points52 points ago

                                                                    sometimes, you gotta fight the power.

                                                                    [–]Flufnstuf 13 points14 points ago

                                                                    I'd very much like to see the original video of this.

                                                                    [–]Humble_Link_Guy 11 points12 points ago

                                                                    not much different

                                                                    [–]Flufnstuf 3 points4 points ago

                                                                    I'm curious...what was the point of making and linking to the GIF if the original video was so immediately available?

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                                                                          [–]warpus 66 points67 points ago

                                                                          That's ok. Even the real hitler didn't match up to his own aryan ideals, with his decidedly non-blonde hair and beady non-blue eyes.

                                                                          Many people don't know this, but Hitler was actually an albino black guy

                                                                          [–]eighthgear 25 points26 points ago

                                                                          That's ok. Even the real hitler didn't match up to his own aryan ideals, with his decidedly non-blonde hair and beady non-blue eyes.

                                                                          While Scandinavian-looking blond haired blue eyed individuals were romanticized by German propaganda, the term "aryan" could also mean people with brown or black hair. The idea that the Nazis only wanted people with blond hair and blue eyes is a simplification. Hitler was completely aryan according to Nazi philosophy.

                                                                          [–]Well_I_think 41 points42 points ago

                                                                          We've all got what it takes to become a Hitler

                                                                          [–]CricketPinata 34 points35 points ago

                                                                          Actually, he apparently did have Blue eyes.

                                                                          [–]atomsAtoms_everywher 11 points12 points ago

                                                                          Yes the fuhrer is completely tainted in my eyes now due to your misstatement. Due to my now tainted view of fascism, i'm off to give multiculturalism, fraternity, and brotherly love a chance.

                                                                          See the damage you did!

                                                                          [–]penis_lad_man 4 points5 points ago

                                                                          Aryan originally meant Indo-Iranian peoples (think a bit like Persians) but it became, through mistranslations, to mean people of certain European tribes. Source: "Aryans and British India" by Thomas R. Trautmaan

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                                                                            [–]GonzalaGuerrera 28 points29 points ago

                                                                            Speaking of odd names in the Caribbean, I've also heard that after the United States acquired Puerto Rico in 1898 from the Spaniards, that there was a generation of male children named Usnavy and Usmail for the first American ships that began to dock.

                                                                            [–]Szos 18 points19 points ago

                                                                            But what happened to all the real Hitlers? 

                                                                            I don't know enough about his family, but you'd think there would be dozens of Hitlers  out there. That last name came from somewhere, no?

                                                                            Uncle Bob Hitler and his wife Sue.. What about his cousin Frankie Hitler that emigrated to the US in the early 30's?  

                                                                            All these people just disappear or still hiding out in Argentina?

                                                                            [–][deleted] ago

                                                                            [deleted]

                                                                            [–]opticnerve 45 points46 points ago

                                                                            These three may have made a pact to let the name die, to never have children.

                                                                            http://archives.cnn.com/2002/SHOWBIZ/books/02/05/last.hitlers.cnna/

                                                                            [–]Szos 30 points31 points ago

                                                                            That is fascinating as fuck! I wish the pictures still came up.

                                                                            Remember kids: nothing is permanent on the internet. That story was "only" 10 years old and the links to the images don't work. Its gonna suck in 100 years when scholars try to piece together our history and none of the images appear when they try to access this ancient technology that we called the internet.

                                                                            [–]swiley1983 18 points19 points ago

                                                                            Illustrating the importance of Archive.org's Wayback Machine. Behold the low-res CNN screenshot, etc.!

                                                                            [–]opticnerve 4 points5 points ago

                                                                            Oh my... Is it just me? Or do they resemble Kennedys?

                                                                            [–]Son_of_Kong 15 points16 points ago

                                                                            In 100 years, cyberarchaeology will be as legitimate a science as regular archaeology.

                                                                            [–]istara 6 points7 points ago

                                                                            A hundred thousand Redditors scramble for the chance at their dream job: mining ancient memes and .gifs and reposting them all over the internet. For cash and karma.

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                                                                              [–]alexincode 15 points16 points ago

                                                                              That's really sad. They don't deserve to suffer because of what their great uncle did.

                                                                              [–]SnuggieMcGee 7 points8 points ago

                                                                              ...or they could just change their last name.

                                                                              [–]Tack122 3 points4 points ago

                                                                              Maybe they believe the ideals that created Hitler are somehow genetic and therefore stand a chance of passing them on?

                                                                              Also you know that if they had kids that wanted into politics one day it would happen:"How do you respond to the allegations that you are a decendent of Hitler?"

                                                                              [–]elcrapitan 5 points6 points ago

                                                                              I would assume (having not read the article (tl;dr)) that it is also to remove the possibility of one of their descendants being used as a new rallying point for neo-nazi/extremist right-wing groups.

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                                                                                    [–]Dravorek 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                    nah, in post-war Germany they probably just changed their names.

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                                                                                      [–]TotFacienda 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                      I asked my Spanish teacher why the local word for trash can was savacon and not basurero, like in all other Spanish speaking countries. Turns out that during the American occupation of the Dominican Republic in the 60s, large refuse containers used by the US military had the words 'save a can' written on them. Locals eagerly picked it up (because Dominicans love Americans, even when under US military occupation) and save a can became savacon. True story brah.

                                                                                      [–]Fyzzle 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                      Takin' it back

                                                                                      [–]praise_the_almighty 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                      In Brasil they are in some uneducated parts somehow crazy for "German" names. I have met quite many "Bismarcks" and "Hitlers" over there, though Hitler was mostly used for dogs and Bismarck was a boys name.

                                                                                      [–]Rainieri 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                      Brazil has a large German immigrant population, lots of cities in the South will have people speaking German as their first language. And Bismarck is just a name, nothing weird about it.

                                                                                      [–]Stareid 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                      Nevermind that there's a shit load of germans in southern brazil.

                                                                                      [–]istara 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                      Great for the conspiracy theorists about Hitler escaping to South America and fathering children.

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                                                                                        [–]rjcarr 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                        I like how a lot of Cubans have Russian names like Vladimir and Yunieski.

                                                                                        [–]qdp 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                        I competed in Debate against an unfortunately named pair of twins, the brother and sister Hittlers. (Two t's) They won some medals, but I felt so bad when everybody gasped at the award ceremony instead of the normal half-hearted cheer.

                                                                                        [–]Berxwedan 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                        I've met two Stalins--one from Syria in his 60s, and one from southern India in his 20s.

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                                                                                          [–]Massa1337 232 points233 points ago

                                                                                          I bet the names together cancel the evil out.

                                                                                          [–]WGMindless 239 points240 points ago

                                                                                          Makes sense. Two negatives make a positive.

                                                                                          Hitler Mussolini is basically Superman.

                                                                                          [–]SIOS 73 points74 points ago

                                                                                          Let's hope that works out better than Communist Superman

                                                                                          [–]braunshaver 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                          how did that work out? now i'm ridiculously curious

                                                                                          [–]TheInternetHivemind 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                          Here you go.

                                                                                          [–]PFisken 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                          In the end, very good.

                                                                                          And communist Superman did do a lot of good (before faking his death).

                                                                                          [–]LincPwln 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                          Superman can't go five goddamn minutes without faking his death.

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                                                                                            [–]ztherion 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                            http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Superman:_Red_Son

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                                                                                              [–]ItsKyo 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                              Lana.

                                                                                              [–]Tokumaru 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                              Lana!

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                                                                                                [–]advancix 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                And like Superman, Hitler Mussolini fights crime. Is Superman not Clark Kent, but Hitler Mussolini?

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                                                                                                  [–]wayfaremonk 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                  What if his middle name was Stalin?

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                                                                                                    [–]OH_Krill 49 points50 points ago

                                                                                                    Adolf Hitler Clark, convicted of third-degree murder in 1988.

                                                                                                    EDIT: Not to be outdone, here is Adolf Hitler Clark, Jr.. I can see the family resemblance.

                                                                                                    [–]jkd42 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                    Under aliases it lists "Adolph Hilbert". Not sure why I can't stop laughing at this.

                                                                                                    [–]DriveOver 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                    Sure beats the alternative.

                                                                                                    [–]jkd42 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                    I guess it just conjures up images of the actual Hitler wearing the fake glasses/mustache combo. On the lamb and talking to his neighbors in Argentina like "No, No. Adolph Hilbert. I love za jews!" Or maybe its the fact that instead of changing his name from Adolf he just subs "ph" for the "f". Now the cops that are looking for a black guy named Adolf will be thoroughly thrown off his trail.

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                                                                                                      [–]moskoismycat 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                      TATTOO LEFT ARM CHEESE ART EYE SARA BURNING SKULLS

                                                                                                      WAT.

                                                                                                      [–]Kela3000 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                      TATTOO LEFT ARM CHEESE ART

                                                                                                      This was featured in LA Ink. A cheese-loving man was diagnosed with lactose intolerance, so he got a memorial tattoo.

                                                                                                      [–]mamjjasond 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                      TATTOO LEFT ARM CHEESE ART EYE SARA BURNING SKULLS

                                                                                                      Yet another great option for a name.

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                                                                                                          [–]evlwaz 209 points210 points ago

                                                                                                          This guy must be a bad ass. Only way he could have survived recess with that name.

                                                                                                          [–]gerbal 111 points112 points ago

                                                                                                          No, the part of Brazil he's from had quite a few "Refugees" who arrived after WW2. Many of whom were quire fond of fascism.

                                                                                                          [–]buntH0LE 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                          All the refugees who fled to SA after the war went to southern Brazil and Argentina. This man is from Goias which isn't one of the southern states.

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                                                                                                            [–]Kfabulous9 69 points70 points ago

                                                                                                            I wonder what his middle name is?

                                                                                                            [–]Piratiko 237 points238 points ago

                                                                                                            Stalin

                                                                                                            [–]FAGGOT_POLICE 164 points165 points ago

                                                                                                            Don't, just tell us

                                                                                                            [–]Piratiko 101 points102 points ago

                                                                                                            Let's not Russian to this.

                                                                                                            [–]Ramsayy09 67 points68 points ago

                                                                                                            What are you china say?

                                                                                                            [–]Piratiko 58 points59 points ago

                                                                                                            Mao Mao Mao, let's not make this political.

                                                                                                            [–]thehotcarl 50 points51 points ago

                                                                                                            You need to chile the fuck out

                                                                                                            [–]Piratiko 34 points35 points ago

                                                                                                            No way! I'm Havana great time!

                                                                                                            [–]jkd42 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                            There's a Pol Pot more where that came from.

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                                                                                                              [–]Iammeandnooneelse 42 points43 points ago

                                                                                                              And you need to Czech your language, there's kids around here!

                                                                                                              [–]Beznia 44 points45 points ago

                                                                                                              Lets see how far this pun thread Congo.

                                                                                                              [–]Boozewoozy 33 points34 points ago

                                                                                                              It's Ghana go on for a while.

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                                                                                                                        [–]cresur 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                                                        In Brazil they don't typically have middle names like in the US. The common format is [given name] [mother's last name] [father's last name].

                                                                                                                        This guy's full name is Hitler Mussoline Domingues Pacheco, where "Hitler Mussoline" are the given names, "Domingues" is the last name of his mother and "Pacheco" the last name of his father.

                                                                                                                        You can see there was probably a little bit of malice from the news crew in presenting him like that because, unless specifically requested, the pattern to put names of people in the screen is [first name] [last name]. So this guy should be "Hitler Pacheco," which is also funny, but the crew probably thought Mussoline was too good to pass up.

                                                                                                                        [–]modnar 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                                        Loves

                                                                                                                        [–]InventorOfMayonnaise 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                                        Hitler Sodomizes Mussolini

                                                                                                                        [–]new-socks 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                                        Probably Jesus.

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                                                                                                                          [–]Eoiny 44 points45 points ago

                                                                                                                          In Catholic school a priest once told us (presumably apocryphally) about an unmarried girl who gave birth to twins. At the baptism, the girl's father told the priest to name the children Hitler and Mussolini.

                                                                                                                          The priest was puzzled and asked, "Why those particular names?" The girl's father replied, "Seemed like good names for a pair of bastards".

                                                                                                                          (Priest telling us this story then laughed hysterically. I was about twelve at the time. Awful, awful man.)

                                                                                                                          [–]Piratiko 130 points131 points ago

                                                                                                                          Literally Hitler Mussolini

                                                                                                                          [–]kavorka2 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                                                          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xaa44OdV-N0

                                                                                                                          32 seconds in (don't use wadsworth constant)

                                                                                                                          [–]ingo302 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                                                          Hahaha, this is hilarious, this guy has been something close to a celebrity here in Brazil for a while.

                                                                                                                          His full name is Hitler Mussolini de Moura Pacheco and he died a few years ago (2009, I believe). He was considered an extremely corrupt cop.

                                                                                                                          [–]mr0bunghole 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                          There is a guy in Nebraska named Dick B. Cumming. I would say that's his "official" name because it's listed on his insurance license.

                                                                                                                          [–]Beetso 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                          Now why the hell wouldn't you go by Richard. Or Rick. Or Ricky. Or Rich. Hell, he'd be better off going by Chard, for chrissakes!

                                                                                                                          [–]UnKamenRider 13 points14 points ago

                                                                                                                          I collect bad names. I should post them in r/mildlyinteresting sometime.

                                                                                                                          [–]BackOff_ImAScientist 45 points46 points ago

                                                                                                                          His middle name is McKittenpuncher if that helps.

                                                                                                                          [–]10shun 24 points25 points ago

                                                                                                                          http://i.imgur.com/kNFLb.gif

                                                                                                                          [–]Shonuff8 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                          Somewhere, Joey Joe Joe Junior Shabadoo just shed a tear of happiness.

                                                                                                                          [–]1337Lulz 36 points37 points ago

                                                                                                                          http://static.happyplace.com/assets/images/2011/10/4e8c86e81803a.jpg

                                                                                                                          http://static.happyplace.com/assets/images/2011/07/4e24804a22ea1.jpg

                                                                                                                          http://static.happyplace.com/assets/images/2011/07/4e1b60a04555f.jpg

                                                                                                                          http://static.someecards.com/someecards/images/feed_assets/4da856bec788f.png

                                                                                                                          http://static.someecards.com/someecards/images/feed_assets/4da77827ae041.jpg

                                                                                                                          http://static.someecards.com/someecards/images/feed_assets/4da46aa343294.png

                                                                                                                          http://static.someecards.com/someecards/images/feed_assets/4da474049afc4.jpg

                                                                                                                          [–]Salva_Veritate 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                          If you want baseball players, I can give you baseball players. Of course there's Rusty Kuntz, but there's also Cannonball Titcomb, Wonderful Terrific Monds, Oil Can Boyd, Al Kaline (a Hall of Famer, at that), Ugly Dickshot, the completely unrelated Boob and Dick Fowler, and the player who's simply in the records as Beer.

                                                                                                                          [–]SheSaidItWasCute 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                          We can't forget Coco Crisp with the Athletics!

                                                                                                                          [–]bostonbruins 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                          Milton Bradley as well

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                                                                                                                            [–]spitfire173 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                            Capt. Hyman Shocker will be my super hero name!

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                                                                                                                              [–]MrTheFinn 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                              What about Mimi Beardsley?

                                                                                                                              [–]MartyFromNC 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                              Worst. Name. Evah.

                                                                                                                              [–]zenlogick 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                              came for this, was not dissapoint

                                                                                                                              god bless drew boogie

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                                                                                                                                [–]malachymac95 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                                                                Tinycock McBurstedGrapeAnus would like to have a word with you!

                                                                                                                                [–]armedohiocitizen 10 points11 points ago

                                                                                                                                Is that Scottish?

                                                                                                                                [–]mismetti 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                Ah my own country never ceases to amaze me.

                                                                                                                                [–]spc1979 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                                what about 9/11 Sandusky

                                                                                                                                [–]Normalling 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                                                                I was going to use my l33t g00gling skillz to prove this is a fake, but the really sad thing is that it's real. Hitler Mussolini Pacheco was the police chief of Goiás (the Brazilian equivalent of, like, South Dakota) and passed away in 2009 from heart complications.

                                                                                                                                I can't even ...

                                                                                                                                [–]Bill_puss 49 points50 points ago

                                                                                                                                ...poop anymore.

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                                                                                                                                  [–]bagofbones 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                                  The director of police is literally Hitler.

                                                                                                                                  [–]BrandonToddCarr 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  This guy is literally Hitler.

                                                                                                                                  [–]walking_away_ 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  My great grandfather escaped Germany during the years leading up to the war. They went to Brazil where they had to change their names, my grandfather was named Hitler, and lie about their origin. After my great grandmother passed away, my great granddad married a native Indian woman. My grandfather was the typical aryan and his half siblings were dark skinned, with the long jet black Indian hair, but they had the lightest of blue eyes.

                                                                                                                                  My grandfather's favorite niece gave all her sons the middle name Hitler. So my cousins have names like: Washington Hitler, Kennedy Hitler, Ronald Hitler, and my favorite, Franklin Hitler.

                                                                                                                                  [–]Bill_puss 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Whistle while you work, Hitler is a jerk, Mussolini pulled his weenie now it doesn't work.

                                                                                                                                  [–]Zyvexal 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  The worst part is, if people tried to google him, they'd never find anything.

                                                                                                                                  [–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  His entire name is "Hitler Mussolini Pacheco", he was the director of the civil police of the State of Goiás at the time of the release of the documentary whose frame is OP's submission. He has become mildly famous when his son was arrested in 1999, I guess his name is "Satan-Goss Vader Pol Pot Sauron"

                                                                                                                                  [–]bearvivant 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  he dead- http://www.mp.go.gov.br/portalweb/1/noticia/5ee5c9f9c699d4dea46162ba2743e4cd.html

                                                                                                                                  [–]GonzalaGuerrera 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Weird and unusual names are so commonplace in Latin America. Hugo Chavez actually tried to legislatively ban baby names like Edigaith, Mileidy or Superman and create an "official" state list of permissible names but it ended up being a massive fail.

                                                                                                                                  [–]Meraxes_ 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Number 16 Bus Shelter. This is someone's name.

                                                                                                                                  [–]KiLLaKRaGGy 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Middle name?

                                                                                                                                  Hirohito

                                                                                                                                  [–]Karnnette 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Who would realy name their child Hitler?

                                                                                                                                  [–]armedohiocitizen 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                                                  The Mussolinis

                                                                                                                                  [–]nameandnumber 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                                                  A bunch of nazis ran to South America after WWII to escape persecution.

                                                                                                                                  [–]Karnnette 55 points56 points ago

                                                                                                                                  So they name their children Hitler, very inconspicuous.

                                                                                                                                  [–]JakeCameraAction 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Actually, I think the real answer comes from this top comment: http://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/x5d6t/worst_name_ever/c5jb3l1

                                                                                                                                  I've met a few hitlers in my lifetime. I'm from the Dominican Republic, a country that is very far from aryan... but some macho ignorant fathers have no idea what hitler was about...all they know is that bad dude from the war movies, so they name their boys hitler so they'll grow up to be a "badass"... the "Hitlers" I've met are all black.

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                                                                                                                                    [–]logicallyillogical 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                                    Worst name you say...

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