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I shed a tear... (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Valkyrie2

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[–]MykoDaShmo 112 points113 points ago

well, think of it this way.

Hyrule

total casualties: oot - few hundred via ganondorf take over, mm - a few thousand via apocalypse, ww - a few million via flood, tp - a few hundred via twilight beasts

things to fear: hell on earth, ultimate power, lord of evil

chances of being a hero: very low, as there is only one destined hero

Mushroom Kingdom

total casualties in mushroom kingdom: maybe five... but you just come back as a simple ghost

things to fear: sad and cloudy days, incompetent koopa lord, being tickled

chances of becoming a hero: your competition is a chubby plumber who can jump high, the place is littered with unlimited power ups

so, yeah, i love hyrule and all, but the mushroom kingdom seems to be a much better location to live

[–]rymlks 50 points51 points ago

you forgot about this one for the mushroom kingdom "things to fear" list

[–]Nicxtrem99 24 points25 points ago

I think I'd prefer my own world now...

[–]Julian1224 2 points3 points ago

So.. The one-up's i get from being megamario are souls? Are one-up's souls of the people of mushroom kingdom? Super mario is a darker game than i thought.. ._.

[–]thumper7 5 points6 points ago

Or this fellow

[–]RioTheDragonMan 2 points3 points ago

Cracked: After Hours episode that talks about this a bit more.

[–]Xethos 0 points1 point ago

and this

[–]AsaWalden 12 points13 points ago

Majora's Mask's events take place in termina, not hyrule. If I lived in child timeline ocarina of time, it's perfect. Link warns the king before Ganondorf can take over, we live life. I die way before the flood happens. That being said, I would rather be killed by a monster while exploring hyrule than sit around on a mushroom all day.

[–]Dean_K1 5 points6 points ago

I hate to be technical... but the Flood happens in the Adult Link timeline. :<

[–]AsaWalden 0 points1 point ago

Even better!

[–]MykoDaShmo 4 points5 points ago

Well, correction: random portals in the woods that lead to worlds doomed for apocalypse.

But what you choose to do in Mushroom Kingdom is your own :P There is actually lots to do from gambling at Great Guy's Casino to exploring Yoshi's Island!

[–]EveryWind 13 points14 points ago

Not to mention that any pots you had would be smashed by some asshole with a sword...

[–]taltal_34 2 points3 points ago

  1. Learn pottery

  2. Open a pot shop

  3. ???

  4. Profit

[–]fender72692 12 points13 points ago

but when Bowser took over the mushroom kingdom, he turned all the citizens into blocks, mountains and clouds, which is why you see eyes on all the scenery. I'd rather be a person than a cloud or even worse, a block for mario to punch a mushroom out of or destroy

[–]seluropnek 10 points11 points ago

That's just the Mushroom Kingdom Old Testament. Things have become decidedly less violent since then.

[–]fender72692 0 points1 point ago

still though, what citizens do you see of the Mushroom Kindgom besides the Mushroom people and Mario. Not to mention the hundreds of Bowser's minions just staying in the same areas of the map going back and forward, never leaving except for some of the stupider koopas who decide to take the final fall after insanity has overtaken them. I would love to live in Hyrule where you can earn an honest day's ruppees just by going in the grass and having a hero that saves you over and over again no matter what the terrain the land becomes

[–]GJCaesar1138 0 points1 point ago

Plenty in Paper Mario.

[–]OnTheArchipelago 5 points6 points ago

and...you ruin my dream :/

[–]MykoDaShmo 4 points5 points ago

EXCELLENT!

[–]CaptainJizzBeard 0 points1 point ago

This is one of the greatest gifs of all time.

[–]Gentlemenofclass 5 points6 points ago

Oh don't forget all the bottomless pits and angry sun trying to kill you

[–]Bert306 3 points4 points ago

I would love to live in Skyloft though, that place seems amazing

[–]CaptainSombrero 2 points3 points ago

Unless you have ADHD, like me, and you're chillin', relaxin', thinkin' 'bout shit, then I decide to go for a walk, and then I think, "holy shit, I'm in the fuckin' sky!" Then I proceed to trip off the edge, fuck, in mid sentence I remembered there are guards that protect you. But I'm still afraid of heights. And I don't trust birds.

[–]Julian1224 2 points3 points ago

I dont think i would ever ride an loftwing, i would never jump of an platform and be able to whistle relaxed..

[–]Bert306 0 points1 point ago

well then you would not like it there but I think it would be amazing.

[–]tomutwit 5 points6 points ago

Yeah, Hyrule is a LOT more realistic (apart from the magic and stuff it's practically a real medieval world) whereas the Mushroom Kingdom is a total fantasy land. I'd prefer the MK too, if I got to be all cartoony, otherwise I'd just stick out like a sore thumb. Hyrule would be better if you stayed human, although it's a dangerous place.

Oh, but it is pretty dangerous in the MK. Floating blocks, attacks every few minutes, have you seen the intro of Mario Galaxy? Bloodbath.

[–]Julian1224 -1 points0 points ago

Mario galaxy wasn't Mushroom Kingdom?

[–]tomutwit 2 points3 points ago

beginning was. Fire rains down from the doomship, toads get either killed or frozen solid. THAT SHIT HAPPENS TO THEM EVERY OTHER DAY.

[–]helpless_slug 16 points17 points ago

But a Zelda fan could survive so easily in Hyrule!

OoT - Become a Gerudo. They're unharmed before, during, and after Ganon's reign.

MM (which was Termina, not Hyrule) - Go to the edge of Termina while the moon dropped. The moon is barely bigger than Clock Town. I'd chill at the beach at Great Bay and be completely out of range of the falling moon.

WW - People of Hyrule survived the Great Flood and lived on the mountaintops (which were islands after the flood). Just go to the top of Death Mountain. Eventually you may learn to fly.

TP - Go live with the Yeti. Their house was awesome and the soup looked tasty. But if anyone says something about a mirror, just snowboard your ass out of there!

[–]zombieCyborg 28 points29 points ago

Re: OoT - If I'm remembering correctly, you don't "become" Gerudo. You are born in that tribe. They are all female, with one mega-villian male every thousand years or something.

Re: MM - If anything the size of a small town crashes into your planet, the damage would not be as small as you're giving it credit for. Something that large is comparable to what took out the dinosaurs.

Re: WW - An event of that magnitude would have serious casualties, and I'm not sure evolution works that way outside of pokemon. Maybe some of them survived the trek up the mountains.

Re: TP - I don't remember this game enough to dispute it. I would totally eat soup with yeti.

[–]larpas 5 points6 points ago

About WW, it's heavily implied that the zoras "evolved" into the Rito. It may not be Pokemon, but it's not real life either. Edit: it was the Rito, Ruto was a Zora princess. My mistake.

[–]DINOFACE21 4 points5 points ago

Isn't Ruto a Zorra?

[–]ewest 5 points6 points ago

Princess Ruto was a Zora. I think he misspoke.

[–]cereal_bawks 7 points8 points ago

They evolved into the Rito, not Ruto.

[–]capncanuck 3 points4 points ago

No way, I've never made that connection.

[–]pameatsbabies 8 points9 points ago

Really? It's kind of implied with the sage.

edit: formatting

[–]CaptainSombrero 1 point2 points ago

Who was the Earth Sage then? I forget. Did he look like a Kokiri?

[–]Kwizi 5 points6 points ago

Yes, a kokiri named Fado. Here's a recap picture

[–]helpless_slug 4 points5 points ago

I'm aware of all this. I was merely trying to imply that Zelda fans would definitely be able to survive longer than those who aren't aware of the secrets of Hyrule. There are tons of little places that seem untouched by evil where I wouldn't mind living in Hyrule. Ordon Village, for example. The worst things that happen in Ordon are Link gets kidnapped, a spider crawls on Link's ladder, and a goat gets loose. Otherwise, it seems pretty nice!

[–]zombieCyborg 7 points8 points ago

I agree, I would MUCH rather be in Hyrule. The Mushroom Kingdom seems so damn volatile. Any idiot with a plunger and a hard-on can topple an entire regime. I never understood why the entire kingdom had to get stomped on so that Mario could rescue one person. At least in Hyrule it takes an act of god(s) to have the occasional bad few years. And there's never a lack of prophetic heroes to keep those in check.

[–]Isayimanatheist 2 points3 points ago

Correct for tp.

[–]CaptainSombrero 2 points3 points ago

Actually, no. Even if you knew where the yeti house was, you probably wouldn't survive the trek up there, with the blizzard, white wolfos, keese, etc.

[–]Julian1224 1 point2 points ago

Meh, if you have an sword and a shield, or at least a sword, both would be easy to take out.

[–]Julian1224 1 point2 points ago

Meh, if you have an sword and a shield, or at least a sword, both would be easy to take out.

[–]Isayimanatheist -1 points0 points ago

Implying a redditor would leave the house and not just dependbon the yeti's.

[–]PresumablyCorrect 1 point2 points ago

To clarify on the Gerudo: one man is born into the tribe every hundred years. This man must become their king by law. I imagine at that point they all reproduce with that king or find other men to become impregnated with.

[–]Gyrant 6 points7 points ago

This is the other thing. Royal hostage-takings and world-rending shenanigans only happen in hyrule once every few hundred or few thousand years.

In mushroom kingdom, the princess is kidnapped, by the same guy, on a weekly basis, and the military is so shitty that the same fat italian plumber has to save her bitch ass every time.

[–]Cosmologicon 1 point2 points ago

total casualties: oot - few hundred via ganondorf take over

I actaully counted the number of people who were shown to have died in OoT once. Unless I missed something, it's only four: Dampe, that one guard in Hyrule Castle Town, and Koume and Kotake. (We can infer more, but that's all that's explicitly shown.)

[–]thelfj 1 point2 points ago

You clearly haven't seen the Mario movie.

[–]MykoDaShmo 1 point2 points ago

What movie? There never was a movie! You're crazy! You're a crazy person!

[–]Spaghettisaurus 43 points44 points ago

I can believe it.

"Sorry, but I'm gonna be late to work today... there are, like, five Redead in my path."

"I had to cancel my golf game because some kid played the song of storms."

"There's a national crisis, but the next incarnation of a great hero has not been discovered yet, or born yet, or he's in stasis for seven years, so I guess I just have to wait it out."

Not that I'm a fan of generating money by bashing my fist or head into floating bricks, but I think transportation via adorable dinosaur companion would make it worth it.

[–]Spaz_Mah_Tazz 7 points8 points ago

Would you rather transportation via the sewer/tiny adorable dinosaur/go-kart or horse/teleportation/flight? It's a hard one...

[–]Spaghettisaurus 7 points8 points ago

I can't whistle, so loftwings are right out for me. And I think dinoback beats horseback any day, especially if the dinosaur can flutter kick and breath fire.

But I WOULD prefer to play a song and warp to my destination over trying to take a dinosaur or go-kart on the Los Angeles freeway....

[–]Albatoonoe 6 points7 points ago

You know, I bet they'd make little whistles for people that can't do it on their own. They seem like nice folk.

[–]Mazgelis626 18 points19 points ago

Hyrule. For the Bombchu girl and the Bombchu girl alone.

[–]Rswany 12 points13 points ago

http://i.imgur.com/VNlsF.gif

[–]CrackerJack23 9 points10 points ago

Good because Lon Lon ranch is mine.

[–]CaptainSombrero 4 points5 points ago

I am Lon Lon Ranch and I definitely wouldn't date you.

Also, joking aside, Anju is mine. Forever and always.

[–]DrTatertots 3 points4 points ago

Screw you guys, I'm getting Zelda.

[–]Link3693 3 points4 points ago

Sorry, but I'm the Link around here.

[–]DrTatertots 2 points3 points ago

Dude, c'mon you have like thousands of Zeldas. Just let me have one!

[–]RoniKing98 0 points1 point ago

Which one? I'd rather have... I have no idea.

[–]DrTatertots 1 point2 points ago

TP Zelda. Seriously, though. Is she not the hottest Zelda?

[–]RoniKing98 2 points3 points ago

She would just understand you.

[–]DrTatertots 0 points1 point ago

I understand.

[–]CaptainSombrero 0 points1 point ago

No. She isn't. SS Zelda.

[–]arrjayjee 2 points3 points ago

Malon fans represent!

[–]Nathan561 0 points1 point ago

What about the girl with the afro from TP?

[–]mediaG33K 12 points13 points ago

I maintain dual residency. The paperwork is a bit tedious, but it's worth it.

[–]DrTatertots 0 points1 point ago

I'd live on the border.

[–]Asuperniceguy 12 points13 points ago

You know what? I'd probably fucking die in Hyrule. It must have a population of like 400, probably because everyone else is dead. The mushroom kingdom would be a lot easier to live day to day in. Bowser steals some princess? So what, man. Ganondorf fucks my shit up? No thanks.

[–]InfamyDeferred 18 points19 points ago

Paralyzed and eaten by redead is probably the worst way to go of all. And I haven't killed any bosses irl, so I imagine I've only got 3 hearts

[–]Brockbfball1563 11 points12 points ago

Mushroom Kingdom actually would probably be a much safer place to live. More relaxing too. But the amount of fun to be had and the amount of stuff that there is to do in Hyrule just puts it so far above the MK that it's not even a question.

[–]ByDarwinsBeard 12 points13 points ago

i don't know, they're constantly having go cart races, tennis, soccer and golf tournaments, and giant insane parties, not to mention that simply being in the mushroom kingdom is like living an LSD trip, how could you ever be bored there?

[–]GameGenie710 11 points12 points ago

Hmm, well let's look at the choices here. We've got a sweaty Italian plumber and a cute blond, blue-eyed master swordsman. GEE, I WONDER WHICH WORLD I'D WANT TO LIVE IN.

[–]Bespectacled_Gent 19 points20 points ago

Baby, you know you want me.

[–]Devilsdance 4 points5 points ago

Every time I see a picture of a paper mario game I remember just how cute they are.

[–]Catman789 5 points6 points ago

is it because you were happy this question existed, or were you sad that peopel preferred a safe land of happiness?

[–]GreyouTT 0 points1 point ago

Bowser invades every five fucking minutes.

[–]Inspired_by_TiR 4 points5 points ago

Do I have to do it sober or can I drink myself stupid?

[–]Villapwn 4 points5 points ago

To be fair, shit goes down in Hyrule.

[–]tomutwit 3 points4 points ago

What app is that? Is it on Android?

[–]BioSpock 2 points3 points ago

Yup. It is called You Rather

[–]IAM0M3GA 2 points3 points ago

Now we know our enemies when the time comes.

[–]8nate 1 point2 points ago

Mushroom Kingdom is probably less dangerous

[–]Shnazzyone 1 point2 points ago

In all reality I would also choose the mushroom kingdom because of all the drugs everywhere.

[–]pwaves13 0 points1 point ago

what app is this

[–]kinglopez 0 points1 point ago

mushroom kingdom is a more magical place though!

[–]HelenRox98 0 points1 point ago

Why??? Why would you NOT choose Hyrule?

[–]dudebuggy 0 points1 point ago

Who would want to hang in the Mushroom Kingdom when you could be eating rocks with some Gorons. Fuck this poll.

[–]ihatecheez 0 points1 point ago

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE???

[–]RideTehKitteh 0 points1 point ago

Mother of hyrule

[–]I_am_an_Erin_too 0 points1 point ago

DO you have to have an account to answer questions on this site?

[–]AsaWalden 4 points5 points ago

Yes you DO

[–]Valkyrie2[S] 0 points1 point ago

I think you do.

[–]DrTatertots 2 points3 points ago

*DO

[–]ahuck71 1 point2 points ago

Is there an iPhone app for it? Every one that I have found looks different!

[–]Valkyrie2[S] 1 point2 points ago

Yes. It's called (drumroll please) YouRather.

[–]ahuck71 0 points1 point ago

Got it!

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