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all 150 comments

[–]onlyunicorncansaveus 194 points195 points ago

Then I don't need a jacket.

[–]nullvoid8 89 points90 points ago

heehehehe

[–]mild_snakz 77 points78 points ago

Thanks Arthur.

[–]MestR 37 points38 points ago

[–]LawlzyGamer 17 points18 points ago

Or the completely lost like I was

[–]Chazzey_dude 3 points4 points ago

Yep, I was trying to link it to Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy

[–]Expensive-Panda 22 points23 points ago

So pretty much everywhere, its gonna be hawt.

[–]4alizer 14 points15 points ago

Tuesday's coming, did you bring your coat?

[–]HeroDiesFirst 10 points11 points ago

I live in a giant bucket

[–]Eal12333 4 points5 points ago

HoyooaAAA

[–]GuyInATopHat 9 points10 points ago

HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE

[–]sheriff_skullface 2 points3 points ago

bring a jacket

[–]ExplainsDisapproval 1 point2 points ago

just in case

[–]Demilitarizer 0 points1 point ago

Just hop in the clear blue water

[–]Nathineil 0 points1 point ago

I came here to post this :)

[–]SMERSH762 84 points85 points ago

1002 degrees. Wind chill will make it feel like 80, however.

[–][deleted] 77 points78 points ago

Getting a soft breeze coming in from Neptune it seems.

[–]Persdear 22 points23 points ago

Uranus

[–]jazzyy 9 points10 points ago

who are you quoting

[–]JustHereToDerp 10 points11 points ago

His anus apparently.

[–]DR_McBUTTFUCK 12 points13 points ago

I heard anus.

[–]alexxxor 2 points3 points ago

Hello? Yes, this is anus.

[–]sfriniks -3 points-2 points ago

That number is the low, not the wind chill. Also, windchill is really only applicable in the winter.

[–]SMERSH762 16 points17 points ago

So you're saying the temperature will fluctuate between 1002 and 80? What is it, a solar flare?

[–]CP_DaBeast 2 points3 points ago

Tuesday is the same day my new Video Card is supposed to arrive. They're just predicting typical nVidia weather.

[–]geeky_username 0 points1 point ago

Fresno, CA

[–]gloriaforgold 5 points6 points ago

the devil's asshole

[–]unsilviu 38 points39 points ago

What I see coming from a metric-using country:

MON: boiling alive TUE: supernova going off in your backyard WED: more boiling alive of charred remains

[–]ZapActions-dower 12 points13 points ago

In America:

MON: Fuckin' hot. Not so bad if you are young and hydrated w/ low humidity though.

TUE: The inside of a blast furnace.

WED: Time for some motherfuckin' lemonade.

[–]o3okevin 3 points4 points ago

Lost it at this comment

[–]JarrodThompson 23 points24 points ago

"Next on Mercury 1 News..."

[–]MrGoodbytes 13 points14 points ago

It's going to be hoooooot in topeeeekaaaa.

[–]Jackayl -1 points0 points ago

This certainly needs more upvotes.

[–]MrGoodbytes 1 point2 points ago

SHowers in SHpokane.

[–]Sir_Clyph 0 points1 point ago

Damn, you beat me too the fosters reference.

[–]Neklarigebla 23 points24 points ago

For those who are wondering, 1002 °F = 539 °C.

[–]Henry1987 20 points21 points ago

its safe to say... that ill be dead anyways even if its in Celsius, kelvin or Fahrenheit

[–]ZapActions-dower 2 points3 points ago

Even if it were Rankine, you'd be dead as a doornail.

[–]Anon090 9 points10 points ago

Np let me find my SPF 10,000.

[–]arcanition 1 point2 points ago

SPF (approximately) multiplies the amount of time it would take your skin to burn by the number given. Even with SPF 10,000 you wouldn't last very long.

[–]fatso1000333 20 points21 points ago

Dude, I'm gonna have to stay inside if its over 1000 degrees

[–]labradorrescuer 11 points12 points ago

Yeah, lets play xbox.

[–]Syvius 18 points19 points ago

[–]ratchelle 1 point2 points ago

what the hell

[–]M15CH13F 1 point2 points ago

I lost it on the 5 day forecast

[–]magister_docendi 14 points15 points ago

Turns out the end of the world is coming a few months early

[–]Herpinderpitee 3 points4 points ago

An apocalypse arrives presicely when he means to.

[–]magister_docendi 1 point2 points ago

Indeed, Gandalf

[–]V1bration 13 points14 points ago

And there's still a fucking cloud in front of the Sun.

It'll be 541313848 without that motherfucking cloud.

[–]TheHappyRogue 8 points9 points ago

That, that just can't be correct. It's 1000 degrees every day in Phoenix

[–]annarchy8 5 points6 points ago

You live in Phoenix, don't you?

[–]geeky_username 1 point2 points ago

Fresno?

[–]annarchy8 1 point2 points ago

It could be from any city in the US right now, honestly. It's just that 1002 is the norm for summertime in Phoenix.

[–]lucas-hanson 6 points7 points ago

So shorts, then?

[–]nickstachio 3 points4 points ago

Why the fuck is Laredo gaining exposure on reddit?!

This is Pro 8 News on NBC in Laredo, Texas. Yes, it's very hot here.

[–]LookAtMyDuck 2 points3 points ago

Heatwave rules

[–]cerealkiller69 5 points6 points ago

I think this was actually just some sort of typo. You likely have nothing to worry about

[–]Itachi0970 2 points3 points ago

whoosh

[–]SeaOfScrolls 0 points1 point ago

Counter [i]whooosh[/i] EDIT: CSS, not BBcode.

[–]Octavius96 2 points3 points ago

And shockingly a low of 80°F.

[–]Herpinderpitee 2 points3 points ago

It's an inexact science.

[–]Daitenchi 2 points3 points ago

The Day After Tomorrow 2: Heat Index

[–]Mermania27 2 points3 points ago

Holy Shit

[–]ZumaZoom 1 point2 points ago

We get days like that all the time in Texas.

[–]SimplePhantom 0 points1 point ago

H.F.S.!

[–]jessejamess 1 point2 points ago

Looks like we will all evaporate. Too bad, I had a nice dinner planned for Wednesday

[–]ghodaz 0 points1 point ago

Sometimes capitalization just does it for me.

[–]Satherton 0 points1 point ago

would Wednesday be godzilla Wednesday

[–]YetiAntics 0 points1 point ago

aaah, a fellow local on reddit

[–]seekingAnswers91 1 point2 points ago

Satan is in town that day

[–]TensaiHilra 1 point2 points ago

but it's a dry heat

[–]jemminger 1 point2 points ago

Gonna have to crawl into the oven to cool off.

[–]olympuso 0 points1 point ago

C U next Tuesday

[–]Drumah 0 points1 point ago

THE FLOOR.., IT WILL BE LAVA!!!

[–]unit2244 0 points1 point ago

So im going to die on my cake day :(

[–]hells_cowbells 1 point2 points ago

Time to break out the SPF 5 million sunblock.

[–]Chivalryisntdead 1 point2 points ago

And for tomorrow, partly cloudy with a chance of apocalypse.

[–]Spiderdan 0 points1 point ago

Good thing my super suit can withstand temperatures of 1000 degrees!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Holy stephenson run to the Antarctic!

[–]OfThriceAndTen 0 points1 point ago

I wake up and look out the window. The end.

[–]Chiddaling 0 points1 point ago

When America is....ashes, you'll have my permission to burn.

[–]TracksFynest 0 points1 point ago

Is to wrong not to up vote just because I like that this has 1234 up votes?

[–]psytrancedsquid 0 points1 point ago

The weather looks like a video slot machine

[–]SeeMeHereSeeMeThere 0 points1 point ago

Welcome to Texas.

[–]Blehgopie 0 points1 point ago

[–]SickOfCats 0 points1 point ago

Well, that's global warming for ya

[–]Evermore707 0 points1 point ago

But it's a dry heat.

[–]SickOfCats 0 points1 point ago

Al gore was right!

[–]madusa77 0 points1 point ago

They must of mixed it up with Tatoonie Weather.

[–]Poppa_Mo 0 points1 point ago

Oh GOD I don't have nearly enough SPF's for Tuesday.

[–]xandan 0 points1 point ago

"yes it seems that on Tuesday it'll be a scorcher with a high of over 1000 degrees and many will not survive. We will keep you updated on this story so stay tuned. Back to you Mitch."

[–]bulletm 1 point2 points ago

Wow a typo. That's hilarious.

[–]rhinorocan 0 points1 point ago

Kevlar Jacket and gloves recommended.

[–]robert235 0 points1 point ago

Tuesday im better off going to the sun.

[–]spartacusisaturtle 1 point2 points ago

OH LAWD REEKRIS! GIT THA WATER NIGGA!

[–]Pamander 0 points1 point ago

God dammit Phil... You had ONE JOB!

[–]I_Chase_Dinosaurs 0 points1 point ago

Global warming, man. Happening faster than expected!

[–]dontwantanaccount 0 points1 point ago

How have you all not melted?

[–]bigtaterman 0 points1 point ago

Well, god dammit.

[–]MasterBistro 0 points1 point ago

At least it's a dry heat.

[–]sl33tbl1nd 0 points1 point ago

As a person who uses degrees celsius, that entire week looks fucking hot.

[–]oh_my_mavis 0 points1 point ago

Time to bust out the capris.

[–]LemonTurtle 0 points1 point ago

The forecast for Monday is high of 101 partially cloudy, with Armageddon following on Tuesday. Now back to sports!

[–]JTyler82 0 points1 point ago

Be sure to wear your oh shit suit.

[–]grandhustler202 0 points1 point ago

100 degrees is the boiling point of water so it looks like it's going to be hot on every day.

[–]TheGlupMaker 0 points1 point ago

Tuesday forecast is sunny with an 80% chance of CME.

[–]BJC_13 0 points1 point ago

These news fuck ups really make my blood boil!

[–]FuturamaReference 0 points1 point ago

We will raise your planet's temperature by one million degrees a day, for five days, unless we see McNeal at 9pm tomorrow -- 8 central!

[–]Phage0070 0 points1 point ago

The question I have is why they allow 4 digits in the template they are obviously using. I assume they would source that data from a database rather than manually entering it, but in any case they should just put restraints on the display. There is no reason 4 digits would ever be a correct temperature.

[–]Lolcat1945 0 points1 point ago

I think everyone would melt...

[–]hillbillyesq 0 points1 point ago

My God, it's The Day After Tomorrow.

[–]Venge 0 points1 point ago

Alderaan?

[–]noluit 0 points1 point ago

Boy, that escalated quickly.

[–]NurmaKhan 0 points1 point ago

and that's in Celsius! Or Kelvin. Just pretend I said whichever you think is funnier.

[–]JMac96 0 points1 point ago

And getting into the week on Tuesday well have a 100% chance of satan.

[–]monty477178 0 points1 point ago

[deleted].

[–]RudyBagels 0 points1 point ago

ANYONE NOT WEARING TWO-MILLION SUNBLOCK IS GONNA HAVE A REAL BAD DAY, GET IT?!

[–]Maxwell5321 0 points1 point ago

I feel like I should make this movie reference. Anyone not wearing 2 million sunblock is gonna have a real bad day, get it?

[–]relaxed9623 0 points1 point ago

Poop at parties much.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Uh oh, my Universe Sandbox is leaking.

[–]TegaladTDM 0 points1 point ago

It''s hottt in To-peka (only Foster's home for Imaginary Friends' fans would get this)

[–]McMcSpam 0 points1 point ago

Typical weatherperson lying again... I wonder which days they got right...

[–]hopsizzle 0 points1 point ago

[–]sk_starscream 0 points1 point ago

Wow Pro 8 news never fails to amaze me.

[–]lrtrimmer 0 points1 point ago

It's posts like this that make me laugh so hard. Upvotes for unexpected laughter

[–]notsurewhatiam 0 points1 point ago

A fellow Laredoan?

[–]Areallybadidea 0 points1 point ago

Doesn't look too cloudy... I say it'll be some good tanning weather right there!

[–]swarlsbarkely 0 points1 point ago

it's also gonna be fucking hot on monday, wednesday, and thursday

[–]pwnyoface 0 points1 point ago

rev up that AC, its gonna be a scorcher.

[–]mont94 0 points1 point ago

fuck and i got training that day too.

[–]iliketopartywg 0 points1 point ago

I wouldn't be surprised with this kind of weather.

[–]corkedtrout 0 points1 point ago

ITS OVER 9000

[–]abortiontickles 0 points1 point ago

Tuesday, on Alderaan...

[–]pikacz 0 points1 point ago

still better than rising our planet's temperature by 1 million degree a day. for 5 days!

[–]grumpyswife 0 points1 point ago

This reminds me of my favorite way to get the forecast:
The Fucking Weather

[–]thosecrazygermans -4 points-3 points ago

Great. A spelling error. Didn't we get over this already?

[–]septimus379 0 points1 point ago

FFFUUUCCCKKK!!!!! THAT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]LouDMont[S] 4 points5 points ago

Poop at parties much?

[–]CamCamJenkins 0 points1 point ago