this post was submitted on
932 points (72% like it)
1,485 up votes 553 down votes

funny

subscribe2,391,123 readers

19,440 users here now

PLEASE, No posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.


Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).


Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.


If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators


The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.


CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

all 65 comments

[–]WeaverXIII 54 points55 points ago

As long as she gives me a courtesy reach-around.

[–]soylentcoleslaw 23 points24 points ago

That's just polite.

[–]Jay_rock 45 points46 points ago

Just because she has a strap-on doesn't mean she has to use it.

[–]themuffinmasher 23 points24 points ago

I like the way you think.

[–]sunkenOcean01 1 point2 points ago

She gives it to you, you double stuff her by yourself. Any problem is now solved.

[–]RaoulDuke92 29 points30 points ago

52 percent of people are missing out...

[–]low_fps11 61 points62 points ago

It's Jessica Alba. She can make every thing to me.

[–]Klhronc 0 points1 point ago

Exactly it's not everyday you have that opportunity

[–]holyducttape 24 points25 points ago

As long as we keep eye contact.

[–]travcook 9 points10 points ago

yes yes yes.

[–]Forever_notalone17 8 points9 points ago

sorry if i sound like a noob but whats this called? and if its on the web whats the website url

[–]setrakakan 4 points5 points ago

[–]Vespyro 1 point2 points ago

I've lost several hours of reddit thanks to you...

[–]Forever_notalone17 0 points1 point ago

you're welcome! :D

[–]Katchup17 6 points7 points ago

thanks for asking this for me, I wouldve been so embarrassed.

[–]wowshamwow 2 points3 points ago

Well, the sex act described is called "pegging." I don't suggest you go looking it up, unless, you know, you're into that sort of thing.

[–]Nothinggoingon 12 points13 points ago

I imagine it was men vs. women on this one...

[–]TheGrandOne 15 points16 points ago

But which gender voted yes?

[–]t_hab 5 points6 points ago

If you know which gender you are, and what choice you made, just go with it.

[–]admanb 1 point2 points ago

Between straight men who are okay with it or actively enjoy it and lesbian/bi women, I'm not surprised you get 48%.

Plus, liars.

[–]DerpMatt 6 points7 points ago

Shut up and bend over, internet.

[–]Paco_Is_A_Taco 7 points8 points ago

There are two types of people in this world.. People who would get rammed by jessica alba, and dirty goddamn liars.

[–]Merfen 2 points3 points ago

If I get to have my way with her afterwards then yes, otherwise hell no. Too many variables to answer off that question.

[–]2ndChanceCharlie 2 points3 points ago

My only condition would be that she be gentle.

[–]angryhuman 0 points1 point ago

It's not gay if you don't push back.

[–]The1KrisRoB 7 points8 points ago

It's not gay if there's no other guy involved

[–]angryhuman 0 points1 point ago

Obviously you've never been out to sea.

[–]totems 3 points4 points ago

That picture must be photoshopped.

[–]murderousmarty 2 points3 points ago

it's not, i saw it the other day. I didn't pick the, "not", side.

[–]Pway 3 points4 points ago

For sure I would.

[–]aesamattki 5 points6 points ago

52% have sticks up their asses.

[–]admanb 10 points11 points ago

48% will.

[–]appleofpine 3 points4 points ago

Not really.

[–]pumpkinhooker 2 points3 points ago

As a woman, yes.

[–]arcanition 2 points3 points ago

I agree with the 48%.

[–]Dyslexiaihave 1 point2 points ago

Is that an app or a website? If so which one site or app?

[–]infamousgerman 1 point2 points ago

It's called "You Rather"

[–]mo_dingo 1 point2 points ago

As a man, most definitely YES! As long as I can tell everyone about it.

[–]JohnJain 1 point2 points ago

We are the 48%

[–]egboy -1 points0 points ago

At first I was like, "yeah, wtf with 52% not".... then looked up strap-on google. Then I was like no no no no no

[–]Ran4 1 point2 points ago

Consider looking up Jessica Alba on google as well.

[–]NumbersMakeMeHorny 0 points1 point ago

r/pegging would disapprove

[–]r0bbiedigital 0 points1 point ago

fuck, are these the new ecards? quick, lets have a vote, who wants to banish these to their own sub like ecards are... /r/WouldYouRather holy shit, it already exists.......................