this post was submitted on
1,545 points (53% like it)
12,574 up votes 11,029 down votes
shortlink:

funny

subscribe2,531,606 readers

10,373 users here now

NEW! No gore or porn (including sexually graphic images). Other NSFW content must be tagged as such

Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

Please No:

  • posts with their sole purpose being to communicate with another redditor. Click for an Example.

  • Screenshots of reddit comment threads. Post a link with context to /r/bestof or /r/defaultgems if from a default subreddit instead.

  • Posts for the specific point of it being your reddit birthday.

  • Politics - This includes the 2012 Presidential candidates or bills in congress.

  • Rage comics - Go to /fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu instead.

  • Memes - Go to /r/AdviceAnimals or /r/Memes instead.

  • Demotivational posters - Go to /r/Demotivational instead.

  • Pictures of just text - Make a self post instead.

  • DAE posts - Go to /r/doesanybodyelse

  • eCards - the poll result was 55.02% in favor of removal. Please submit eCards to /r/ecards

  • URL shorteners - No link shorteners (or HugeURL) in either post links or comments. They will be deleted regardless of intent.

Rehosted webcomics will be removed. Please submit a link to the original comic's site and preferably an imgur link in the comments. Do not post a link to the comic image, it must be linked to the page of the comic. (*) (*)

Need more? Check out:

Still need more? See Reddit's best / worst and offensive joke collections (warning: some of those jokes are offensive / nsfw!).

Please DO NOT post personal information. This includes anything hosted on Facebook's servers, as they can be traced to the original account holder.

If your submission appears to be banned, please don't just delete it as that makes the filter hate you! Instead please send us a message with a link to the post. We'll unban it and it should get better. Please allow 10 minutes for the post to appear before messaging moderators

The moderators of /r/funny reserve the right to moderate posts and comments at their discretion, with regard to their perception of the suitability of said posts and comments for this subreddit. Thank you for your understanding.

CSS - BritishEnglishPolice ©2011

a community for
to anything interesting: news article, blog entry, video, picture...
message the moderators

MODERATORS

reddit is a source for what's new and popular online. vote on links that you like or dislike and help decide what's popular, or submit your own! learn more ›

1544
1545

The last 5% of a download (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by redditredo

all 125 comments
sorted by:
best
best
top
new
hot
controversial
old

[–]crayola_ferrari 107 points108 points ago

Loading up a nearly finished video in VLC and hoping bits of it will play; it's like peeking at your presents the day before christmas

may or may not be referring to pornography

[–]redditredo[S] 93 points94 points ago

Guys. He's referring to pornography.

[–]crayola_ferrari 44 points45 points ago

I've been rumbled D:

[–]EvenSteam 26 points27 points ago

I was expecting that to be a gif and realized that I've been refreshing the page for no reason

[–]EvenSteam 37 points38 points ago

Now that i'm off my phone, I now realize it is a gif and my mobile service sucks

[–]redditredo[S] 9 points10 points ago

I say guys like more than one person is going to comment on this thread. Silly me with all my hopes and stuff.

[–]shperdy 0 points1 point ago

and pedophilia. Gross

[–]ArturusRex 1 point2 points ago

DUDE! Load the .part file, then it works fine! Just open the .part and it's exactly like a buffering video.

[–]phider 3 points4 points ago

When torrenting something and you try to start at 98%, it will start playing and random little bits will cut out or be corrupted looking.

[–]tyme 3 points4 points ago

You might know this but that's because of how BitTorrent works. It doesn't download the file from start to finish, it grabs bits from different seeders until it has the complete file.

[–]phider 2 points3 points ago

I do, I was just explaining how it works for videos.

[–]Koyah 0 points1 point ago

That's only if you get to that part of the file before it is downloaded. With a fast enough seed and using uTorrent's streaming I've started a file that was less than 50% and not noticed any problems.

[–]phider -1 points0 points ago

Yeah the streaming is a nice feature but not what I was talking about.

[–]Wizard_Alien 1 point2 points ago

it always stops at the good part

[–]turdyturd -1 points0 points ago

i thought you said peeking at your parents

[–]Magester -1 points0 points ago

I'm up about 4 hours after when I should have been asleep (I blame Reddit) and had to read it twice because I first read "Peeing in your presents" and thought "Why would you do that to your own presents?"

[–]WOW_IM_SEXY_AS_HELL -4 points-3 points ago

LmAo ThiiiiiiiNk YoU'rE FuNnY ?!?!?!

[–]jamesf797 46 points47 points ago

5 seconds left... 3 seconds left... 1 second left.... 5 seconds left... 12 seconds left... 5 seconds left... 20 seconds left.... and so on and so on

[–]redditredo[S] 27 points28 points ago

1.2 mb/s...216 k/s...3 k/s...0 k/s....1 k/s...42 k/s....levels out at 426 k/s

[–]MartyredWretch 17 points18 points ago

You gotta love internet speeds, maybe one day my ISP will actually fix their stuff and provide better then dial up quality. In fact, i may ask them to upgrade me to dial up.

[–]wwwertdf 5 points6 points ago

nah. The isp is doing it right. Most ISP's have a burst rate. For instance my ISP bursts to 75mbps even though my package is 35. Hence why most of the time you can get a fucked up speedtest.net result.

[–]OldAccWasCharlievil 4 points5 points ago

My internet varies from 120-180kbps during the night/middle of the day to about 3-5kbps during the morning/evening.

inb4getbetterinternets I would but the area I live in just gets crappy speeds. If I lived a few miles down the road I'd get better internet but where I live just has poor coverage.

[–]Remnants 2 points3 points ago

I find 5kbps very hard to believe, unless you meant kB/s. 56k is 10x faster than 5kbps.

[–]Chaytup 1 point2 points ago

I hope he means KB/s

[–]OldAccWasCharlievil 0 points1 point ago

Sorry, I meant kb/s.

Edit: At the moment I'm getting 88kB/s on utorrent. That's because I'm also downloading the Fourth Age mod for Rome: Total War though.

[–]EbolaPie 0 points1 point ago

Get a friend and a giant reel of ethernet cable plus a few repeaters. Solved.

[–]Mal_Dovah 0 points1 point ago

Just thought I'd put this here: my internet speed is usually 9KB/s...20KB/s...34KB/s...and it levels out at 45KB/s. That's max speed with no torrents, videos buffering, etc. in the background.

Edit: At least it isn't dial-up shudders

[–]pocketcookies 1 point2 points ago

I can sorta explain this. When you download stuff from the Internet, you're using something called TCP (Transmission Control Protocol). TCP allows you to download a file reliably even over an unreliable connection.

The Internet is considered unreliable. It can randomly drop data a server sends to you, duplicate it, etc. TCP has to function even when your ISP is so congested that it needs to drop some of your data.

Basically, in order to prevent the Internet from crashing (congestion collapse), your computer voluntarily implements something called congestion control.

If the server detects that your computer isn't acknowledging the pieces of the file it sends you, it assumes the network is congested and backs off to make sure everyone gets a fair chance to use the network.

See, if everyone just sent data as fast as they could, everyone's data would collide with everyone else's and the Internet would go really slowly for everyone.

So the download speeds jumping around is probably due to your computer or the server detecting congestion, and backing off, then realizing there's no congestion and speeding up again.

[–]SirAuron 0 points1 point ago

To me, when I download movies, it comes around to 78 weeks left...52 weeks left...23 weeks lefts...40 hours left...24 hours left.... 34 weeks left...

[–]PhiladelphiaIrish 29 points30 points ago

Are you too good for your home? Answer me!

[–]rsheahen 29 points30 points ago

ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME!?

[–]Mr_Quagmire 14 points15 points ago

ANSWER ME

[–]bigsz 10 points11 points ago

SUCK MY WHITE ASS, BALL!

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]SCREAMS_AT_NOVELTIES 1 point2 points ago

HEY LOOK. A NOVELTY ACCOUNT.

[–]Banana_Zombie 1 point2 points ago

I'm surprised this wasn't top comment.

[–]ct450 13 points14 points ago

99.4%

[–]boredoflurking 8 points9 points ago

... 99.5%

[–]JBHUTT09 10 points11 points ago

... 99.3%

[–]SolomonGomes 16 points17 points ago

Fatal Download error

[–]EbolaPie 10 points11 points ago

NOOOOOOOOOO

[–]Innfuryating -4 points-3 points ago

...99.0%

[–]james737m 10 points11 points ago

Also applies to last hour of work

[–]StevieBoySwag 15 points16 points ago

SUCK MY WHITE ASS!

[–]I_cut_my_own_jib 19 points20 points ago

...ball. Whew that was bothering me.

[–]Mr_Quagmire 8 points9 points ago

PIECE OF MONKEY SH-beep

[–]2achariah 1 point2 points ago

Fuck you play it where it lies.

[–]redditredo[S] 2 points3 points ago

Good work! Keep it up man.

[–]DavidSheridanCMU 2 points3 points ago

talk about a hole in one...

[–]eztarget896 0 points1 point ago

you bleep play it as it lies bleep you!

[–]bowei006 4 points5 points ago

There was a thunderstorm in my state today. I was downloading a large file through hotfile. This was my face as it passed 90%...and then..the power went out.................................................................... ಠ▃ಠ

[–]Red_Dawn_2012 0 points1 point ago

Pennsylvania? Ohio?

I was dl'ing GTA II, and the power went out. When I got back on later today, the download was finished. Success.

[–]bowei006 1 point2 points ago

CT, T_T it was a 700MB RAR of a file.............it happened TWICE. The second time it got to 70% before the power cut out.....

[–]PISS_OUT_MY_DICK 5 points6 points ago

Especially when NOBODY FUCKING SEEDS!!

[–]JBHUTT09 5 points6 points ago

The creator of a torrent should seed it forever. Not constantly but maybe for an hour or two, 2-3 days a week. Seriously I hate when I find the torrent I've been desperately searching for only for it to be long dead.

[–]PISS_OUT_MY_DICK 0 points1 point ago

It really makes me mad when the download stops at 99.8%...

[–]NewSeams 5 points6 points ago

Christ I miss good Adam Sandler movies...

Okay, "good" Adam Sandler movies.

[–]luigisfuckingpeach 9 points10 points ago

ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME?!

[–]LaocoonPwnedBySnakes 2 points3 points ago

ANSWER ME BALL!

[–]inphu510n 2 points3 points ago

You obviously never had to deal with downloads on a 56k or lower speed modem.

That was more like the last .5%

Doubly true of pr0n OMG. It was like watching paint dry only to find out that the pics/video was garbage.

[–]nathanandrosie 0 points1 point ago

I'm still so scarred from downloading as a teenager that I don't mind an overnight install of an OS. If a download doesn't take more than an hour I usually don't even blink an eye.

[–]q1014 1 point2 points ago

There aren't enough up votes to describe how much I love this.

[–]Alew22 1 point2 points ago

How would one go about getting this picture blown up and framed? This picture is fantastic.

[–]logicallyillogical 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, lot of pressure. You gotta rise above it. You gotta harness in the good energy, block out the bad. Harness. Energy. Block. Bad. Feel the flow, Happy. Feel it. It’s circular. It’s like a carousel. You pay the quarter, you get on the horse. It goes up and down and around. Circular. Circle. With the music. The flow… all good things.

[–]Joens-Sher 0 points1 point ago

Doing the bull dance feeling the flow, worken it, worken it

[–]lateral_moves 1 point2 points ago

I hate it when a download says 2:21 seconds until complete, then at 99%, when 0:00 seconds until complete it hangs for any amount of time. What is the point of the counter if at 99% it just does whatever the hell it wants?

[–]tagrav 1 point2 points ago

That sums up any steam sale purchase right there

[–]oh_the_humanity 0 points1 point ago

The last 5% of a download

The last 5% of a torrent.

FTFY

[–]phider 3 points4 points ago

At least with a torrent if something goes wrong you can pick up where you left off. Usually you can't do that with direct downloads.

[–]mirv321 -1 points0 points ago

Can anyone explain why that is? Even with perfect internet on larger files ( OS's ) it will cut out leaving me to restart and try again

[–]phider 0 points1 point ago

Sorry, I don't understand the question. Explain why what is?

[–]fletcher720 0 points1 point ago

When WoW updates, it downloads the first 99% in 10 seconds, and the last 1% takes 10 minutes. Unless they fixed it in the last year or so.

[–]TheMajesticMammal 0 points1 point ago

Oh god, this reminds me of the Napster via dial-up days.

[–]SirPedant 0 points1 point ago

Same for uploads with a deadline looming

[–]JacketPotatoes 0 points1 point ago

I'm curious to know what exactly you need to upload that would take such time, with an impending deadline.

[–]IAmAllowedOutside 0 points1 point ago

Gigabytes!

[–]JacketPotatoes 0 points1 point ago

You need to upload a unit of measurement?

[–]IAmAllowedOutside 1 point2 points ago

Many of them!

[–]anoobis360 0 points1 point ago

i feel like this when its at 99% and that last one just takes forever

[–]FWS02 0 points1 point ago

I'm sitting here feebly attempting to load pics from imgur, in a cafe that is apparently serving up internet from a 33.6 modem. I can confirm what Adam Sandler is reporting.

[–]YouHaveShitTaste 0 points1 point ago

torrenting

hahaha peasants

[–]WestsideStorybro 0 points1 point ago

I remember that feeling from the 90's.

[–]zeroskateboarder 0 points1 point ago

YES! 5% left come on...come on...(10 minutes later) come on...

[–]thedavinatorw 0 points1 point ago

Then it stays at 100% for like 5 minutes

[–]Naggers123 0 points1 point ago

When it's the last 5% of a download, I do not really feel the compulsion to travel to a golf course and grimace at a golf ball. Instead, I asians with white girls.

[–]Unicornasaurus 0 points1 point ago

Does no one use newsgroups!?

[–]desertjedi85 0 points1 point ago

I think it fits better for when I'm in bed with a girl

[–]monoethanolamine 0 points1 point ago

95% is enough to play porns if you change the file format directly :D

[–]ThouSniffMyGlue 0 points1 point ago

Try using dial-up.

[–]jfafinski 0 points1 point ago

Kiss my white ass, ball!

[–]bhalden 0 points1 point ago

Relevant: http://gifsoup.com/MzE0OTc5NA

[–]stuckit 0 points1 point ago

A truly accurate loading bar would be awesome. Also a way to tell if the download has crashed at a certain point or if it is just taking a long time would be very helpful.

[–]TehColetrain 0 points1 point ago

I wish I could up vote this a million more times for one of the greatest movie references.

[–]JLRD4L 0 points1 point ago

I feel like this when some of my comments on here almost reaches the top.

[–]Sandy_106 0 points1 point ago

That's been me for the past week of Steam sales.

5 minutes remaining, 5 minutes, 8 minutes, 12 minutes ಠ_ಠ

[–]meowmeow111 0 points1 point ago

Also when you prepay for gas and the last 20 cents or so are like that.

[–]keepitscottie 0 points1 point ago

when you use bittorrent, you stupid fuck.

[–]CrackpotGonzo 0 points1 point ago

"are you too good for your folder?!"

[–]LessLikeYou 0 points1 point ago

Living that right now...for Train Simulator 2012...I just know I'm going to be horribly let down. GD hivemind.

[–]cc_cheeks 0 points1 point ago

i laughed too hard at this.

[–]fiercefoxx 0 points1 point ago

I will always love Adam Sandler. Regardless of his recent atrocities, I will still go see every one of his films in theater.

[–]dr_dracula 0 points1 point ago

Are you too good for your home?!

[–]CodPiece89 0 points1 point ago

Coincidentally this was the last movie adam sandler starred in that was any good. And no, his name doesn't deserve to be capitalized.

[–]Omgitstitti 0 points1 point ago

I logged on just to give you an upvote.

[–]btreichel 0 points1 point ago

I hate the "100%" lie too. IF YOU'RE 100% DONE THEN FINISH GODDAMNIT!

[–]sodypop97 0 points1 point ago

I thought this was a .gif at first and stared at it for a couple seconds. Then I noticed it was a .jpg.

[–]hyuugurt 0 points1 point ago

I've found that if that last part of a torrent is going slow, hitting stop and then start helps a lot. Reconnects you to the faster peers.

[–]thecoletrane 0 points1 point ago

Go to your home!!!

[–]adventurebear33 0 points1 point ago

Are you too good for your home? ANSWER ME!!!

[–]schkmenebene 0 points1 point ago

why didn't you just go home? That's your home! ARE YOU TO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME!? ANSWER MEEE!!

[–]wellmade 0 points1 point ago

You obviously never had to deal with downloads on a 56k or lower speed modem.

[–]marvin4795 0 points1 point ago

You obviously never had to deal with downloads on a 56k or lower speed modem.

[–]Technosnake 0 points1 point ago

Thought this was a .gif so I say here for the last minute and a half looking like a dumbass.

[–]Galaxey -1 points0 points ago

sooo true soooo true

[–]JReAlity -1 points0 points ago

This was THE funniest thing I've seen on reddit today.

[–]2achariah -2 points-1 points ago

Here come the Adam Sandler is aweful.

[–]TacoFloober -1 points0 points ago

Reddit stop describing my life. It is seriously creeping me out.

Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy. © 2012 reddit inc. All rights reserved.

REDDIT and the ALIEN Logo are registered trademarks of reddit inc.

π Rendered by PID 23508 on app-205 running e103ce9.