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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]sleepwithafryingpan 301 points302 points ago

Trying to figure out what my worst nightmare was while waiting for this to load: "waiiiit, I'm not about to watch a raping prank, am I??!"

[–]bluechaka 159 points160 points ago

WHat the hell is a "raping prank"?

[–]Schroedingers_gif 169 points170 points ago

Want to find out?

[–]WhyAmINotStudying 89 points90 points ago

Keep it in the box, kitty.

[–]A_Huge_Mistake 16 points17 points ago

It's not as funny as it sounds, that's for sure.

[–]Wandelation 10 points11 points ago

Ask Japan about it, I'm sure they know.

[–]kind_of_a_big_deal_ 15 points16 points ago

If you thought that much you need quicker internet my friend :P

[–]Smaskifa 37 points38 points ago

Maybe she just thinks faster than you do.

[–]Repostfinder3201 18 points19 points ago

Awww shieeet

[–]arksien 386 points387 points ago

I wouldn't take that as female only. I don't think I would be too keen to see blood presumably coming out of my crotch either...

[–]Skeezypal 134 points135 points ago

Life lesson: if you ever see a little blood coming from there, don't decide to wait until morning to go to the doctor.

[–]Zeoxult 160 points161 points ago

But be sure to post a picture of it to reddit before anything

[–]NotaMethAddict 70 points71 points ago

I can see the AskReddit post now:

Reddit, this morning large amounts of blood started leaking out of my crotch. Should I see a doctor?

[–]Karmasaurus-rex 87 points88 points ago

Or the WTF post:

"Just my bloody wang."

[–]the_silent_redditor 185 points186 points ago

"Found this little gem in my pants this morning"

[–]looseleafer 60 points61 points ago

key word little

[–]IFixStuff 46 points47 points ago

"Saved this guy from my pants today. AOE thinking he's gorgeous?"

[–]talkingzero 44 points45 points ago

AOE - Age Of Empires

[–]Swagnetic 29 points30 points ago

AOE - Area Of Effect

[–]iWright 10 points11 points ago

That's all I think when I see it.

[–]sharts_mcgee 15 points16 points ago

"Hey reddit, can you tell me what's wrong with my crotch? I don't have health insurance and want to know if it's worth going to the doctor. Any advice?"

[–]zyzzogeton 38 points39 points ago

I had a car accident the day before, a car T-boned me drivers side after running a red light, flipping my Jeep and generally causing me a bad day. Went to the hospital, everything was fine.

The next day, my wife and I are at lunch with my in laws and I go to the bathroom and start to piss what I can only assume is unfiltered V8 tomato juice. I go to my wife and tell her "we need to go now" She takes me to our doctor and they ask for a urine sample and to do a hemoccult test (to detect "trace" amounts of blood). I hand them a solo cup full of Snappy Tom's Spicy Red. They rush me to the hospital, do some more tests and say basically "Meh, you are fine."

3 weeks later, kidney stone. It had formed around the clot that formed in my bruised kidneys.

That was a whole different tale.

[–]phearnation 14 points15 points ago

I cringed so many times.

[–]luvmuppet 2 points3 points ago

do a hemoccult test

translated: finger up the ass to check for blood in your stool.

you get an up vote for enduring that.

[–]sundogdayze 34 points35 points ago

Also, leakage is not a woman's worst nightmare. It sucks but it's happened to all of us at least once.

Edit: unless someone really leaked that much, that would make me think I was dying.

[–]trinlayk 2 points3 points ago

at the beginning of menopause sometimes it does... Urgent care checked me for anemia, but pretty much laughed at me.

Post childbirth the flow can be amazingly scarily heavy too.

but yes, nowhere near "worst nightmare", highly embarrassing yes,
but probably down around #15-20+ on the nightmare list... IF that high.

and yeah, i can't think of anyone who hasn't had or worried about an inopportune obvious leakage at "that time."

[–]danceydancetime 75 points76 points ago

Surprisingly this is not my worst nightmare....I thought this was going to be a fake positive pregnancy test thing or something

[–]superatheist95 19 points20 points ago

How could you show that in a gif?

[–]EagleBurn 148 points149 points ago

Please don't challenge the Internet.

[–]Dudedood 2 points3 points ago

Male piss always comes out positive on a pregnancy test, if you can find a way to incorporate that into a prank.

[–]DiggV4Sucks 4 points5 points ago

If you know this because you've done this, I've got some bad news for you.

You have cancer.

[–]gildedbat 782 points783 points ago

Ummmm...no. I can guarantee she was thinking, "WTF is in the water?" and NOT, "OMG! My period!"

[–]sleepy55 117 points118 points ago

You can even tell from her reaction she was freaking out because of the red liquid floating in the water, not because she was embarrassed about it.

[–]cheebromeej 205 points206 points ago

Definitely. The amount of liquid they poured in the pool is probably equal to how much blood we lose the whole week.

[–]seeashbashrun 174 points175 points ago

speak for yourself. Endometriosis here. That's like an hour. I hate my life.

[–]drum1286 104 points105 points ago

I respect your honesty... Whatcha doin later?

[–]seeashbashrun 149 points150 points ago

Probably dying from blood loss.... how about you? (jk, I won't die. I'll just feel like crap)

[–]BigBassBone 29 points30 points ago

My fiancée almost bled to death like that in November. Was not a fun day. Six months and one misdiagnosis later we found out it was ovarian cancer. >.<

EDIT: She's fine for now. Had a full hysterectomy a month and a half ago and we're waiting for a second opinion before starting chemo. It's the rarest form, a clear cell carcinoma, and one of the most aggressive, but it's also very treatable.

[–]seeashbashrun 19 points20 points ago

That's awful! And it sucks, because a lot of doctors are really belittling of anything uterine related. My doc told me I was having 'standard woman troubles' and to get over myself. Turned out I had a tumor the size of a golf ball and several cysts. Is she doing better? I feel like the key with treating this crap is finding a doctor who believes his/her patients.

[–]TorkX 33 points34 points ago

ಠ_ಠ

[–]MrRC 12 points13 points ago

I'm sorry

[–]Pazuzuuu 8 points9 points ago

Uhgg that sucks. Talk about pain.

[–]kristinez 6 points7 points ago

That's about as much blood as I lose in half a day.

[–]Young_cricket 13 points14 points ago

He got this girl good well (?) though.

[–]designerdy 2 points3 points ago

Even the girl in the .gif looked at her crotch. He got her.

[–]madc0wdisease 23 points24 points ago

Yeah, this is just stupid..

[–]TheB1ade 36 points37 points ago

WTF? you mean girls know if they are on or not???

[–]gildedbat 52 points53 points ago

Yes, we do. There are all sorts of physical changes that we experience during menstruation. Blood loss is only one of them.

[–]TheB1ade 79 points80 points ago

Sarcasm detection failure.

[–]gildedbat 139 points140 points ago

Sorry. In my defense, I offer Exhibit A: The majority of comments on this thread.

[–]Galactic 49 points50 points ago

Scans thread: The prosecution rests. No further questions, your honor.

[–]fireflyinajar 1196 points1197 points ago

Periods don't pump out that much at a time, guys

EDIT: For those of you saying stuff about this being a poop accident - I think the female probably did think someone just shat near her. But some people on this thread (including the OP, from the headline) seem to think it's period-related.

[–]sinfulcolors 992 points993 points ago

Really. If there was that much blood coming out from down there, I would assume I was either dying or having a miscarriage.

[–]CoopJ 1542 points1543 points ago

[–]Big_h3aD 30 points31 points ago

10/10, had a solid luahg!

[–]MegaAndyBear 34 points35 points ago

and a stroke?

[–]QEDomelets 341 points342 points ago

YAY LET'S CELEBRATE BLOOD AND DEATH!

[–]C-web 383 points384 points ago

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD

[–]yannickmahe 220 points221 points ago

MILK FOR THE KHORNE FLAKES!

[–]SaikoGekido 176 points177 points ago

[–]Kornstalx 57 points58 points ago

Holy Jeebus. Story on this one?

[–][deleted] 204 points205 points ago

He had no change, man.

[–]Tactful 23 points24 points ago

"What? They want me to slow down and pay money!? The fuck is this, GTA IV?"

[–]DancingWithKafka 94 points95 points ago

Somebody drove their car into a tollbooth.

Goes exactly how you'd expect.

[–]Kornstalx 49 points50 points ago

Do they build tollbooths out of quarried Adamantium?

[–]norwegian-dude 7 points8 points ago

So what you're saying is, action movies ain't exaggerating? Cars do burst in to flames the second they crashes?

[–]SaikoGekido 43 points44 points ago

"Horrible crash and burn on the Garden State Parkway in New Jersey on 5/10/2007

State Police said Friday they're still investigating the cause of this fiery crash that killed a 52-year-old Lower Township may last week.

Bernard King was traveling south on the Garden State Parkway when he crashed into a toll boot at the Great Egg toll plaza in Somers Point around 8:30 a.m. on May 10.

Part of the investigation apparently centers on whether King's history of seizures play a roll in the crash. King's mother, Edna, said her son had a seizure about three hours before the accident.

The official cause of death is listed as traumatic injuries and thermal burns. King's car was traveling an estimated 65 miles an hour when it hit the toll booth and burst into flames.

The fire stymied the rescue attempt of some state troopers who rushed to the scene after leaving their nearby truck-exhaust checkpoint.

The crash closed at least three toll lanes for several hours." - Source

[–]TheGreatWhirlyBird 6 points7 points ago

She died

[–]TorkX 2 points3 points ago

Video. Guy had a seizure apparently.

[–]Fj0ergyn 13 points14 points ago

If you look closely, I think you can see him launch out of the windshield. Godspeed.

[–]AutisticTroll 5 points6 points ago

That's the tire. He/she actually burned in the car for a cool minute.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

AH...AHA! COOL MINUTE

[–]DarthContinent 3 points4 points ago

YOU... SHALL NOT... SunPass™!

[–]meatwad75892 7 points8 points ago

[–]Die-Nacht 14 points15 points ago

HAIL ARMOK!

[–]EliteKill 9 points10 points ago

[–]cdank 23 points24 points ago

Best usage of this meme I've seen.

[–]PancakeWrangler 19 points20 points ago

My lady friends always try to make me believe it just floods out of there at an unbelievable rate. They usually succeed.

[–]loch_ness_lobster 19 points20 points ago

My lady friends are my man-breasts. I thought that you would want to know that.

[–]Jerald_Dullen 2 points3 points ago

I cannot speak for PancakeWrangler, but I most definitely did want to know that. Thank you!

[–]loch_ness_lobster 2 points3 points ago

I was brought into Reddit to help people. I am glad you found me helpful!

[–]absolved 5 points6 points ago

It can, and it does. But there's generally special circumstances. Some women experience this during peri-menopause, and adenomyosis can also cause flooding. It can be so heavy so often that ablations and hysterectomies are performed as treatment.

[–]twistedfork 2 points3 points ago

It can feel like it is a flood. Think about how wet your ass feels when you get swamp ass, only its constant and it is blood.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]DontCallMeNeilSedaka 10 points11 points ago

No man, I'm pretty sure it works like a fountain mechanism or something.

[–]mach-2 5 points6 points ago

Oh dear God.

[–]psychicpilot 4 points5 points ago

I learned this from the movie Blue Lagoon.

[–]l80 345 points346 points ago

Not only that, but water pressure tends to halt the flow of blood. Naturally, this can be a problem when getting out of the pool, but is unlikely to result in that kind of dramatic display while in the pool.

Further, why is everyone behaving like this chick is freaked out that she's leaking? Is it not plausible that she's unnerved at the random pool of blood that spontaneously appeared behind her?

[–]Xunae 194 points195 points ago

I'd be unnerved by a pool of anything (that isn't water) floating next to me in the pool.

[–]tamar 79 points80 points ago

Did you realize she didn't even look at herself? She just freaked because she saw the "blood." She didn't think she did it.

[–][deleted] 90 points91 points ago

Male, married for almost a decade here

I have no fucking clue how much normally comes out, but that wouldn't matter in a situation like this. I'd probably flail my arms around and freak out regardless.

[–]DancingPurpleCat 209 points210 points ago

Well if you're a guy with blood coming out your vagina there's probably a reason you should be worried...

[–]lolita_the_craisin 13 points14 points ago

4-6 tablespoons (1/4 cup to 3/8 of a cup) is average. :/

[–]bizarrokate 2 points3 points ago

Over like 5 days though.

[–]stellareddit 18 points19 points ago

For a male, that seems like a valid reaction.

[–]AppleTStudio 36 points37 points ago

"Little bit of blood makes a large cloud."

-Aldous Snow

[–]mike45010 45 points46 points ago

I kinda thought it was a poop accident...?

[–]Snatland 22 points23 points ago

It looked pretty brown to me too.

[–]gogler8 13 points14 points ago

Yeah I concur. I'm also fairly childish and poop is just funnier.

[–]hobobaggins 105 points106 points ago

Even a small amount of blood in water makes a very distinct cloud

[–]bran-flakes 50 points51 points ago

True, but menstrual fluid only contains some blood, as well as cervical mucus, vaginal secretions, and endometrial tissue. These extras make menstrual blood much thicker (think slimy mucus) than, say, blood from a cut.

Imagine having a nosebleed in a pool, it would cloud like crazy. Now imagine just blowing bloody snot into the pool, there would be far less visible clouding - if any at all.

[–]thosewholeft 24 points25 points ago

Go on...

[–]taylorbcool 3 points4 points ago

Welp. I'm gonna go take a shower.

[–]SongTamRiver 38 points39 points ago

It's not only about amount. It's about viscosity.

[–]thatool 24 points25 points ago

I thought it was supposed to be poo.

[–]red_river_lover 3 points4 points ago

Aw man...

[–]Jukepot 53 points54 points ago

It's astounding how little you guys (reddit men) know about how periods work.

[–]youyouyounotyou 21 points22 points ago

...do you know how periods work?

[–]ImElectroGirl 49 points50 points ago

Its more likely that she wasn't actually on her period so her reaction was "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?" not "OH SHIT I'VE LEAKED!"

[–]charol_astra 15 points16 points ago

that's a lot of blood for a period. like, I reckon that girl would need a transfusion within the hour at that rate.

[–]anotherlittlepiece 18 points19 points ago

That one I can take.

Suddenly going blind from a gunshot wound when walking on the side of the road and having the guy who stops to help me into his car in order to go to the hospital turn out to be the one who shot me and is now driving me someplace else so that he can take his time with things...that's the kind of nightmare I can do without.

[–]bestpersonever 41 points42 points ago

PERIODS STOP IN WATER, GOSH.

[–]carlotta4th 3 points4 points ago

Wh... what? As a female who's never considered going to the pool at that certain time of the month, is this truth? I'm wary to think so...

EDIT: Apparently it's true, by gum. Though I wouldn't say much for "water pressure" after you get out of the pool.

[–]purplehipposanitizer 7 points8 points ago

Bestpersonever is correct. It usually does stop flowing because of the pressure of the water. The lining is still shedding though so once you get out it's a whole other story...

[–]carlotta4th 2 points3 points ago

That would make sense. Thanks for the clarification.

[–]Bananarama20 28 points29 points ago

Yep, when us females get our periods almost a full 10 ounces of blood jetisons its way out of our vaginas all at once. That's what happens.

[–]30percentAlpaca 8 points9 points ago

10 ounces of blood jetisons its way out of our vaginas all at once through the side of our hips

Not exactly FTFY, but just made it a little more accurate to the gif.

[–]Bananarama20 4 points5 points ago

What actually happens is that menstruating females typically slough their entire epidermis. This kills the female.

[–]RosieJo 84 points85 points ago

ITT: Guys state untrue facts about periods, downvote girls that disagree with them.

[–]eekthebat 19 points20 points ago

On this website: Guys who state untrue facts about women, downvote those who disagree with them.

[–]paulduve 57 points58 points ago

Using the word "female" instead of woman or girl is the verbal equivalent of hover hands.

[–]Golden-Calf 12 points13 points ago

Thank you for putting my thoughts into words. It's just so damn awkward when people do that.

[–]nuxxor 80 points81 points ago

Here is the video it's at the end.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lxb7VW7s9MY

[–]haha_isjoke 80 points81 points ago

That guy + his pranking= not funny.

[–]gamergrl1018 3 points4 points ago

Geez, aside from his biological ignorance, it's more rude that he is basically trying to stain innocent girl's bathing suits.

[–]bigbugsbigbugs 53 points54 points ago

"female"

[–]rwbombc 26 points27 points ago

"female" is way too overused on this site. Makes you sound like a statistic instead of a human being.

[–]Lefty07 10 points11 points ago

i dont get it... i think she would realize that wasn't from her when its epicenter is her elbow

[–]ChloeDevvon 10 points11 points ago

It would never bleed that much, that fast.

[–]nukefudge 31 points32 points ago

nightmare

prank

that's not /funny, that's /sad.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Examen 152 points153 points ago

As a lifeguard it makes my day when the pool gets shut down from a fouling, you get paid to sit a do nothing in a office for an hour.

[–]wilc8650 75 points76 points ago

Snickers bar in the bottom of the pool always does the trick.

[–]Examen 20 points21 points ago

During our Staff training and orientation they always tell us not to throw O Henry bars in the pool... Snickers obviously wouldn't work.

[–]WarpvsWeft 64 points65 points ago

My poop comes out like perfectly formed Snickers bars.

I should probably get that checked.

[–]willscy 81 points82 points ago

better be careful, Mars will sue your ass.

[–]NiFrBa 16 points17 points ago

iseewhatyoudidthere.jpg

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]I_am_salad 2 points3 points ago

Yup

[–]TheVandyMan 15 points16 points ago

I can taste it for you to confirm.

[–]abnormalsyndrome 15 points16 points ago

ಠ_ಠ

[–]kukamunga 7 points8 points ago

Mine are like Kit-kats. With the logo and everything. :\

[–]TorkX 7 points8 points ago

POOL'S CLOSED

[–]slupo 47 points48 points ago

Jesus Christ this post just shows how clueless some redditors are about women

[–]Gamer_152 17 points18 points ago

Wow, this is a real dick move.

[–]prongs06 15 points16 points ago

I would just be freaked out about blood any where as I assume any other person would as well.

[–]hi_im_haley 26 points27 points ago

barf. that is no woman's nightmare because its not possible. what do you think we bleed out of there? corn syrup and dye? this isn't jaws. (ps. get implanon ho's. no period for five years and counting. whhaaattttt)

[–]Acebulf 13 points14 points ago

Are you drunk?

[–]SwellsInMoisture 2 points3 points ago

And then comes the fun part when your body may not accept a fetus years later, whhaaattttt.

All birth control methods have their side effects, as well as potential hormone conflicts with each person.

[–]neoblackdragon 7 points8 points ago

I'm a man and I would be seriously concerned of what looked like a lot of blood was floating near me. In the world of CSI, I would thinking dead human body vs some females period.

[–]TheImp5 58 points59 points ago

[–]reallygood 54 points55 points ago

Fuck her life.

I honestly cant imagine how awkward this will be for her.

[–]Richie311 7 points8 points ago

She's a pornstar, so not as awkward as you might think.

[–]please_note 30 points31 points ago

Probably not that awkward. It's fake.

[–]KorbenD2263 84 points85 points ago

Not fake, in the sense that it really is shit, and it really is coming out of her asshole. However, she is a porn star who just did an anal scene, hence the enema leftovers shooting out of a semi-prolapsed anus. So shitting in the hot tub might fall under 'job hazard', along with suicidal depression and AIDS.

[–]MacMcIrish 55 points56 points ago

Apparently you know your shit.

[–]fuckyouripod 2 points3 points ago

er...you are killing my buzz here, Korben.

[–]Zeoxult 5 points6 points ago

What is this from?

[–]the_good_dr 11 points12 points ago

Proof?

[–]NerdusMaximus 32 points33 points ago

"If you can't prove something on the internet is real, it is fake." -Ben Franklin

[–]workingalot 17 points18 points ago

Internet videos are fake until proven real.

-The Constitution

[–]brett84c 11 points12 points ago

It even looked fake to me. Why is there a camera centered on this girl ahead of time? Why would people film themselves just sitting in a jacuzzi? Do you know anyone that, in that situation, would NOT do everything in their power to keep such an embarrassing situation from happening? Oh, and the clouding of the water looks super fake.

[–]HSMOM 3 points4 points ago

I would be crying my eyes.

[–]shootinputin 9 points10 points ago

where is this from?

[–]RotoBone 12 points13 points ago

Ancient internet history.

[–]JKR93 5 points6 points ago

When you gotta go, you gotta go.

[–]savageotter 6 points7 points ago

That led me to some weird part of youtube videos...

[–]dclowd9901 46 points47 points ago

Why didn't OP use the words "lady", "woman" or "girl" in the title, rather than "female?" "Female" sounds so robotic and socially awkward...

I see this abundant usage of Spock-esque language used a lot around this site, and I'm genuinely curious.

[–]orchardrivington 73 points74 points ago

Your period blood doesn't come out when you're in the water (there's this thing called water pressure). She doesn't think it's her period, she just thinks she's fucking bleeding.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Yawgmoth_of_Urborg 17 points18 points ago

It mostly comes out at night. Mostly.

[–]IAmSedders 13 points14 points ago

It's not your fault you have a wide set vagina and a heavy flow.

[–]timescrucial 199 points200 points ago

the gif cut too early. I wanted to see if she checked her crotch.

[–]CGrimz7 306 points307 points ago

I was waiting for bears to arrive. It's common knowledge that they can smell the menstruation.

[–]funktion 86 points87 points ago

she was endangering the entire office.

[–]mach-2 34 points35 points ago

Checkmate feminists.

[–]OrangePrototype 15 points16 points ago

Thats quite a weird fetish, but hey I'm not going to judge.

[–]special2plumsfor1 42 points43 points ago

Thats quite a weird fetish

Judging their fetish as weird.

but hey I'm not going to judge.

Contradiction.

[–]OrangePrototype 50 points51 points ago

I'll send an apology letter to the bears.

[–]mattc286 2 points3 points ago

Bears don't live in the water, dummy! It'd attract SHARKS!

[–]supson6437 32 points33 points ago

hell yes she did, even 3 or 4 times lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lxb7VW7s9MY

[–]ItIsMarc 13 points14 points ago

Y'all are nasty.

[–]dandollar 52 points53 points ago

i would think a girl knows whether or not she's on her period

[–]mnie 13 points14 points ago

Not everyone's is perfectly on time every month.

[–]effieokay 2 points3 points ago

"Ah, 10:17am. Excuse me for a moment, everyone, my period is coming is 30 seconds."

[–]heatdeath 45 points46 points ago

Cruelty. It seems to me that all "pranks" are just an excuse to be malicious. I don't think I've ever met a virtuous person who did them.

[–]LincolnSt 29 points30 points ago

I put beef bullion cubes in my roommates shower head every morning for two months so they would make him smell like soup and I am not a bad per-- no scratch that. I am a piece of shit. Carry on

[–]Naruryk 5 points6 points ago

Upvote for honesty and mid-sentence epiphany!

[–]SouthpawRage 17 points18 points ago

Ignoring the fact that period blood is thick and wouldn't do that, am I the only female who isn't surprised by her period?

It's not like it just randomly appears on some spastic schedule... I'm on oral contraceptives so I guess mine might be more regular than some, but still. There's a 2 day window that it always shows up in, every month... Prepare for it.

[–]Xoryc 4 points5 points ago

Irregular females tend to get surprised.

[–]SouthpawRage 2 points3 points ago

Man, that would suck... Guess I'm lucky that I was regular before I even went on BC.

[–]GraniteGrump 18 points19 points ago

I think the prank was really on the pool owners who had to close it and drain all the water.

[–]UnsightlyBastard 8 points9 points ago

They don't drain all the water...they just put chemicals in it to sanitize it...

[–]Nicknam4 2 points3 points ago

Lol you know nothing about pools

[–]leebria36 9 points10 points ago

Call me crazy but I'm pretty sure most girls know when their periods are. This is just stupid.

[–]cronos844 5 points6 points ago

That's not funny PERIOD!

[–]carlsaischa 2 points3 points ago

Extra points if the girl is a couple of months pregnant.

[–]themarknessmonster 4 points5 points ago

ITT: Guys that know way more about girls periods than they do.

[–]BravesMaedchen 2 points3 points ago

A girl's period stops when she's immersed in water. Duh.