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all 48 comments

[–]JoJiKH5 25 points26 points ago

Actually met my SO online. Thinking I should start calling her a Great Old One...

[–]knighmare 5 points6 points ago

no no, call her mother that

[–]RockasaurusRex 0 points1 point ago

Then sleep with her.

[–]bakerzero86 25 points26 points ago

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

[–]Gooberpatrol66 27 points28 points ago

Dentist: ”Sorry, what was that?”

[–]TheShittyBeatles 21 points22 points ago

Translation:

Cthulhu - Not even once.

[–]doktor_wankenstein 2 points3 points ago

Never without my permission.

[–]John_Barleycorn 12 points13 points ago

My favorite part about this submission is how you ruin the punchline by putting it in the submission title.

[–]miteypaul 1 point2 points ago

That's why I don't read titles and straight-up click every link.

Downside: every 20 minutes I see something that makes me less human.

[–]jpshum 28 points29 points ago

Cthulhu later left stacy for her mom

[–]Whiskey_Fred 24 points25 points ago

Her mom, does in fact, have it going on.

[–]rmhawesome 2 points3 points ago

She's all I want and I have waited. For so long

[–]CthuluVoIP 9 points10 points ago

This is libelous and I won't stand for it.

[–]Infectaphibian 2 points3 points ago

Not dead which can eternal text message.

[–]RageGodReed 3 points4 points ago

The bear version of this one was funnier

[–]Neoxite23 2 points3 points ago

Cthulhu saved the world though.

[–]manueljljl 1 point2 points ago

What about Cthulu kill for hire service.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Not long ago, I read a thread about an asshole father. It went something like this, I'll paraphrase:

"Dad, how do I stop bullies from messing with me online."

Dad slams laptop shut, "There you fucking go."

[–]goodbyestinker 0 points1 point ago

I think it's "predation."

[–]rip_out_spines 0 points1 point ago

he was probably trying to convert her from christianity, but, you know, these things happen...

[–]sexytoasty 0 points1 point ago

how do you pronounce cthulhu?

[–]whistlestoannoyyou 3 points4 points ago

kuh-thoo-loo

[–]Giggyjig 0 points1 point ago

Cth-oo-loo

[–]cthulhu4pres 0 points1 point ago

It's all lies!!

[–]WhoRunsBarterTown 0 points1 point ago

IA IA CTHULHU JAILBAITAHGN

[–]quityelling 0 points1 point ago

Praise Him.

[–]galbrth 0 points1 point ago

I wish I had a dollar for every time this got reposted

[–]cuddy33 0 points1 point ago

[–]Discoamazing 0 points1 point ago

Haha, I love how she mentions that the boy was "deep."

[–]BEAVERWARRIORFTW 0 points1 point ago

Pardon my ignorance reddit freshman here. What is a chutullu.

[–]gumbo86 1 point2 points ago

A god like creature from the mind of H.P Lovecraft. Call of Cthulu, specifically .

[–]BEAVERWARRIORFTW 0 points1 point ago

Okay thanks.

[–]UZUMATI-JAMESON 0 points1 point ago

No fools, spelling out the word Cthulhu awakens the beast! Why do you think Metallica spelled it Ktulu!?

[–]D3A7H 0 points1 point ago

The moment I read this the song:call of Cthulhu by Metallica came on. Coincidence? Hell no.

[–]getintheBatmobile 0 points1 point ago

Now why would Reddit be posting stories about my personal life on here?

[–]coledog22 0 points1 point ago

You have no idea how many times this has happened to me.

[–]FlashFyre 0 points1 point ago

It's an Ood!

[–]Hoppipzzz -2 points-1 points ago

Fucking repost.

[–]PostNaGiggles -4 points-3 points ago

Repost. I saw this a couple months ago.

[–]Chinook700 3 points4 points ago

This is actually ancient...

[–]johnw1988 -1 points0 points ago

While the image is funny I don't agree with what it is making fun of at all. I think it is perfectly fine to meet some new friends online as long as you are safe and logical about it. If someone want to meet at the mall (somewhere with hundreds of people around) they obviously aren't going to harm you. If someone wants to meet in a shady back alley somewhere, then you have a problem. People need to learn the fucking difference.

[–]Jesta05 2 points3 points ago

People need to learn that some things aren't meant to be taken seriously.

[–]whistlestoannoyyou 0 points1 point ago

I've called the FBI on your ass.

[–]BEAVERWARRIORFTW 0 points1 point ago

Hey want to meat in A shady back ally?

[–]DrCthulhuPhD -1 points0 points ago

Ah...i remember that...those were bad times.