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all 44 comments

[–]dastardlylemon 44 points45 points ago

This just isn't complete without utterpedant's beautiful corresponding fanfic from last year.

[–]donald20 3 points4 points ago

I've never laughed so hard at a comment. Thank you sir, and may your abs gallop you away into the night.

[–]Ohsochefly 0 points1 point ago

"He entered her like a lottery" if you know what I mean

[–]DoYouWantAnts_Lana -5 points-4 points ago

you are not receiving enough upvotes for adding this to the conversation.

[–]Ovaldo -1 points0 points ago

You're not even adding to the conversation, nor am I. Let's sit quietly and watch.

[–]DoYouWantAnts_Lana -1 points0 points ago

i hope your dick suffers from parkinsons.

[–]motherofamouse 24 points25 points ago

  • he

[–]Spiffy313 4 points5 points ago

[–]nixnaxmik 1 point2 points ago

Go on...

[–]KyleMC 12 points13 points ago

Either I'm getting dumber or these OP's are getting more and more creative with their post titles

[–]chexmixdeluxe 25 points26 points ago

50 shades of GAY!

[–]UhOhPoopedIt 7 points8 points ago

Go on...

[–]apextek 6 points7 points ago

next page please

[–]bastard_thought 14 points15 points ago

[–]Ovaldo 0 points1 point ago

I was about to post a similar thing, mine went along the lines of, "Hey, isn't there a rule or something about punchlines in titles? Because this is the second time I've seen this happen." I think mine in comparison is nicer, but your's works too.

[–]jyhwei5070 3 points4 points ago

this might just motivate me to start reading again...

[–]10tothe24th 3 points4 points ago

I just started professionally writing some... ahem... adult stories, so I've made a point to read a ton of erotica just to familiarize myself with it. I also, for whatever reason, felt compelled to check out some romance novels, thinking I might write stories that sort of straddle the line between romance and straight pornographic erotica.

Without question, the writing quality of romance stories is infinitely worse than that of the straight-up porn. You'd think it'd be the other way around, since romances have to worry about things like plot and setting and character, but nope. That shit is fucking awful.

I think it's because the romance authors are usually total prudes, while the erotica authors are usually more in their element.

[–]GoneAPeSh1t 2 points3 points ago

[–]rumnscurvy 1 point2 points ago

There was a short film screened at Cannes this year called The Dickslap. I shit you not.

[–]alienbringer 0 points1 point ago

That is similar to mushroom stamping i suppose.

[–]RiceIsBliss 2 points3 points ago

Sandra Hill always delivers.

Pffff

[–]2l2t 2 points3 points ago

I instantly remembered this

[–]ehjayred 2 points3 points ago

Sandra hills ALWAYS delivers... Dick attacks

[–]keirsch 2 points3 points ago

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO HILDA?

[–]sakredseven 5 points6 points ago

i thought it was called rape

[–]JesterAzazel 2 points3 points ago

Surprise sex.

[–]Naberius 1 point2 points ago

I gather the book is meant to be funny.

Thus lines like "Dick Attack." And the plot.

[–]Highlighter_Freedom 1 point2 points ago

This is a parody... right?

[–]synicalx1 1 point2 points ago

Where's Shitty_Watercolour when you need him

[–]Sam_Kablam 0 points1 point ago

Barefooted is a grammatically correct word?

[–]EmptheBear 3 points4 points ago

Did you read the rest of it? I don't think that writer is concerned with being grammatically correct or even being a good writer.

[–]iMisan 1 point2 points ago

I can't believe that this 'author' has been on the NY Times Best Sellers List. Granted, that particular list is a popularity contest, but that style of prose is probably duplicated a million fold every day in 8th grade creative writing classes across the country.

[–]Andross12 0 points1 point ago

"washed his hands at the kitchen sink" lol

[–]QuackWhatsup 0 points1 point ago

"Laugh-out-loud fabulous"

It's just so.... Flamboyant...

[–]phliuy 0 points1 point ago

the fuck kind of name is hildy?

[–]toughluck1 0 points1 point ago

Women must think we must have some sort of substitute for PMS and periods... I.E, the dick attack.

[–]ArsenalOwl 0 points1 point ago

What's wrong with his arm?

[–]Flapjack_ 0 points1 point ago

There's a shirtless dude in modern camo with a gun walking away from a viking longship

What the fuck

[–]HouseOfKrazees 0 points1 point ago

Read the Zane books...those are EPIC

[–]gullis187 0 points1 point ago

WTF, post the next page, i was getting aroused!!

[–]HiImDan 0 points1 point ago

I'm surprised with all the reposts, this hasn't become a common joke.

[–]Dave_Vai 0 points1 point ago

If there was a rape pokemon, that would be it's best attack move, dick attack, it would do 120 damage and you would use 3 energy cards to do this move.

[–]mikeypipes -4 points-3 points ago

Utterly shameless repost. Kill yourself.

[–]matafubar -1 points0 points ago

I'll be delivering an alien to you...

dramatic pause

or die trying

gasp