I used to work in a craft store, we got all types of crazy customers that would come in, I also live in a rich part of California with a very specific type of yuppie whose shit has always had a faint smell of rose. I was having a terrible fast paced day, mid July wicked heat, and no AC in the store. Customers were pissed about the wait time, while I am the only person checking at the time and a Queen Bee Bitch drops her basket into my queue and makes me remove everything from it myself while she turns her back to me and squawks into the phone like the harpy she is.

I am making amazing time despite the fact that she has made this as hard as can be. She has yardage of ribbon that she doesn't have a tag, I politely tap her on the shoulder to see if she has it on her person since it isn't with her purchase. She snaps around and glares at me as if she is trying to decimate me with her mind alone. I don't respond to her since I am exhausted, I glance at the line and people are obviously fuming. I dial the fabric department get her measurements, mean while a manager has manned the other register and is quickly processing people through.

Chatty Kathy chimes into her phone about the asinine events of her daily life, I firmly but politely read her the total and ask her for a form of payment. She doesn't even turn around to face me this time, she just holds out her hand to silence me. I mime to my manager that she is being another kink in a day that doesn't need it. My manager tells me in his regular conversational tone, "If a customer demands you wait on them, wait on them."

I whipped out the book I kept for slow times and started reading. My manager apologized to the last few costumers in line, and the joined me at my station and he unfolded a newspaper that he had in his apron. 4 minutes later, she finally turns around to see us both nose deep in reading material. She freaks out and starts yelling, explanations be damned. "How dare you, do you know who my father is? Why didn't you just finish your job? Who do you think you are?" The quick fire lines that poured from her mouth were fantastic. I guess no one had put their foot down to her ridiculous attitude. During her freak out, she demands to speak with a manager.

He folded his paper in half and placed it on the counter, he never even looked at her when he started asking me about how the transaction went. After I explained the situation he then started asking me about the book I was reading. Then he asked about the weather, by the time he asked me about my book she was livid, he placed a hand out to silence her, and when she did he looked her dead in the eye and said

"Oh, I am sorry, was it hard to conduct business when one person involved is having a private conversation? Well maybe next time in the future we won't be on our phones while trying to buy something from some one. Now will that be cash or charge?"

She stood silent as the grave as she paid.

I fucking loved that guy!