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all 81 comments

[–]Krags 28 points29 points ago

False alarms are not funny, because they desensitise you to the real thing.

[–]natjo 16 points17 points ago

The boy who cried wolf can attest to that. That dude has got the thousand yard stare after that Alpha ate his Momma on that picnic. Lucky Liam Neeson arrived in time to save the boy.

[–]dnrchy1 4 points5 points ago

you should get an r/trees award for that

[–]ArgleKargle 8 points9 points ago

I'll second that. Fucking asshole friend of mine thought it was funny to do that shit when we were smoking outside. This is NOT FUNNY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

[–]Euphorium 6 points7 points ago

My friend kept saying there was zombies last time I smoked with him. One of these days, he's gonna get my face eaten off.

[–]MelchiorTheOne 23 points24 points ago

It'll be hilarious when trees are legal.

[–]Ayevee 9 points10 points ago

"when"

[–]the_dyslexic_kid 7 points8 points ago

Imagen; "YOU GUYS!!! COPS!!!" every stays lisend shortly after people everyone bust out laughing "HAHAHAHA! REMEMBER WHEN WE GAVE A FUCK?!!!!"

[–]ctzl 5 points6 points ago

Now that's funny!

[–]redsquirrelAM 15 points16 points ago

FriENT Steve did this the other day. Fucking Steve.

[–]deadfield918[S] 8 points9 points ago

Is his first name Scumbag? lol

[–]blazed_n_confused 19 points20 points ago

No, his first name is Steve.

[–]Aziral 8 points9 points ago

That was great. Best comment in this thread by far.

[–]four24ever 2 points3 points ago

Confirmed.

[–]legendofsteve 4 points5 points ago

In all likelihood, yes.

[–]rekomSdeeW 1 point2 points ago

My name is Steve. And sadly I was the one it was being done to.

[–]lennonleninlemon 5 points6 points ago

My friend used to do this multiple times a night smoking on our porch, always when I'm about to take a hit, too. Never ceased to wig me out for a second, fucking annoying.

[–]deadfield918[S] 12 points13 points ago

This one kid that was freeloading off of me and my best friend when we had an apartment together did this one time. We were having a little sesh with my girlfriend and his lady in our living room. We were at a solid [6] on our way to a [7] when we hear this banging on our front door and this deep voice say "Great Falls Police Department!" We go from the [6] to an extremely panicked [3]. My best friend tells everyone in a whisper yell "Hide!" We all start for the bathroom then the door opens at he pokes his head in and goes "Gotcha, bitches!". Needless to say we didn't talk to him for the rest of the night. And we made him sleep on the porch.

[–]Jakerson11 8 points9 points ago

Can I be honest? I thought that it was funny

[–]RudoshiZukato -3 points-2 points ago

I probably would've slugged him, planted my foot in his gut, and slammed the door in his face. Fuck people like that. Good job not whupping his ass.

[–]villin609 10 points11 points ago

You might want to talk to somebody about your anger issues. That reaction is a bit extreme.

[–]RudoshiZukato 3 points4 points ago

So is the douchebaggery of coming to a gathering like that. I'm pretty relaxed until something like that's pulled. Otherwise, I have a pretty lengthy fuse.

[–]Veteran4Peace 1 point2 points ago

I probably would've slugged him, planted my foot in his gut, and slammed the door in his face.

I have a pretty lengthy fuse.

Um, yeah....about that lengthy fuse...

[–]KillaKip 0 points1 point ago

Than you obviously don't smoke enough weed if a tasteless joke like that makes you want to seriously hurt someone. Get over yourself

[–]Phallic 5 points6 points ago

You guys all hang out with fuckheads.

If someone did that to me they'd get one warning then they wouldn't be my friend any more.

[–]tommygmore 2 points3 points ago

eddie murphy standup is the best of all time!

[–]DillonMcD 3 points4 points ago

this stupid asshole put on a blue and red strobe light in the back of our car. worst night ever..

[–]Sttmb12r 3 points4 points ago

Must. Do.

[–]Stutsyboy 3 points4 points ago

Eddie Murphy's delirious is the funniest thing I have seen in my life. Actually lost it from this gif, seeing as the way he says it is hilarious.

[–]tehnico 1 point2 points ago

I suppose stevie get behind the wheel and crash into a tree right? HA HA HA Very FUNNY mutha FUCKA!

[–]Stutsyboy 1 point2 points ago

You don't impress me man... you wanna impress me? Take the wheel mother fucker.. epic straight face

[–]thatguyferg 2 points3 points ago

I also hate when people freak out when you see a cop and start stuffing things away and it looks shady.

For instance, I have a hawkeye when it comes to cars it seems. I can tell makes and models from a decent distance and at night and all that good stuff.

So if we're driving around I'll usually warn the driver by saying cop or something along that line. But then everyone starts freaking the fuck out and like hiding shit and moving around.

If everyone were to just chill and act normal we would be all good.

[–]putcreativenamehere 3 points4 points ago

I know right? That's what I always say, it almost makes me want to smoke alone. Damn... You'd be a good friend to hang out with. I like you :)

[–]thatguyferg 1 point2 points ago

I aim to be.

And thanks Dude McDudeson I like you as well.

[–]putcreativenamehere 1 point2 points ago

More like Chick McChickerson xD

[–]thatguyferg 0 points1 point ago

My bad, dude and man just kinda come out of my mouth at this point I use them so much.

Plus I feel dude is unisex, everybody is a dude!

[–]putcreativenamehere 0 points1 point ago

It kind of is, actually xD and I get the feeling, I call EVERYBODY "babe" or "honey," and I'm not even from the south! I have lived In New England all my life xD

[–]thatguyferg 0 points1 point ago

It just makes you seem relaxed during the conversation and just generally laid back.

[–]putcreativenamehere 1 point2 points ago

My friends say it makes me sound like a mom xD

[–]thatguyferg 0 points1 point ago

Hahah or like a Vietnamese lady at a nail place. I only know how they sound because my sister made me go with her once hahaah.

[–]putcreativenamehere 1 point2 points ago

Oh god, yeah! My mom used to drag me there when I was little. Maybe that's how I picked it up... O.o

[–]slappindabasssince86 2 points3 points ago

Yep, just about shit my pants when my friend did this.

[–]HavocPlus 2 points3 points ago

It was all fun and games, my friend said "its the cops!" jokingly about a car pulling up, while at this place we called the quarry. (which was just this dump that was down this dirt drive way. Which we thought was a different friends property.) and it actually was the cops. some of people i was with got into trouble for having alcohol. While i was the only person with green, getting searched and in even deeper shit.

sometime that shit is real when someone says it.

[–]Ambivalentgent 2 points3 points ago

Yeah fuck that shit, this guy was trying to get a bunch of people to do that to his "friend" at his apartment complex- everyone just looked at him and told him to fuck off. love it when GGG's outnumber the SS's

[–]redhanded1 2 points3 points ago

thats like shouting fire in a crowded theater for stoners

[–]jwescott425 2 points3 points ago

STEVIE WONDER IS A MUSICAL GENIUS! (furiously snorts and wipes nose and storms off)

[–]KiddieCocaine 2 points3 points ago

This happened the first time I smoked but, instead of cops it was aliens.

[–]lionofjudah123 2 points3 points ago

I almost shit my pants laughing when I read "aliens".

[–]Sttmb12r 1 point2 points ago

Aliens

[–]hazious 2 points3 points ago

The second time i smoked i was guilty in this. It was not to freak everyone out though, but we were sitting in a big field, and at the end of the field you could see flashlights moving. So i kinda got paranoia and said "Cops!" out loud. I feel sorry for my mates.

[–]charblah 2 points3 points ago

Happened the first time I got to about an [8], you can imagine how fucking panicky I was.

[–]Lefty07 2 points3 points ago

invisible zombies...

[–]compromised_account 2 points3 points ago

My friend would do this but with the principals name. "BRISDEN!!" And we would all fucking tuck our balls back into our bodies whilst pooping our pants. Ah highschool. And now i've got a med card so that no matter what happens I ain't going to jail. WHATS UP NOW BRISDEN?!

[–]sativacyborg_420 2 points3 points ago

or when they use the cop siren app its some bullshit

[–]Clydeicus 2 points3 points ago

Once whilst among a group of friends cruising around the neighborhood, my brother pulled out this app and the car in front of us just bolted and sped off.

[–]01zerrz 2 points3 points ago

This happened to me just last night no joke, the night before the cops had actually rolled up on us. Scary Shit.

[–]lionofjudah123 2 points3 points ago

I remember skating whilst smoking joints behind an ingles at 11 PM with a kid we met named Mississippi(Yes that was his name). And then he yells, "Cops!" there was a black SUV coming through. And I freakin sprinted across the park(Our local park that is gigantic called Heritage Park is right next to the back of ingles) while holding my skateboard and into the woods. I come back it turns out it was a couple looking for directions -.- Mississippi knew it wasn't the cops but me and my friend didn't.

[–]zbopadop 2 points3 points ago

Dude... the "Cops!" and then everyone splittin', or movin' around, or putting shit in pockets... that's the shit that gets you caught up. There is nothing illegal about chillin' and chattin', maybe passin' around a cigarette or 3 (one of those being a joint or bowl or blunt). Suspicious activity/body language draws attention. Casual confidence that you're within your rights doesn't so much. I don't know how many times I've hit a joint while making eye contact with an officer of the law. I'm assuming as far as they knew I was smoking a cigarette. Either that or they straight don't givafuck.

Real talk.

[–]lariona 2 points3 points ago

I've had so many encounters with cops while smoking, and I think it's hilarious. You can get out of most situations being courteous and respectful to the officer. You guys are wusses.

[–]undersquirl 1 point2 points ago

I have a friend that does this all the time. He's a fucking asshole!

[–]Cole1064 1 point2 points ago

Iptokes for Delirious Terrence. :)

[–]xDeranx 1 point2 points ago

I live in San Francisco. most of my friends have cards now but we always "say oh shit its the FEDS" its was funny for the first like 100 times...

[–]NoSeedsNoSeeds 1 point2 points ago

y friend did this once, i was very mad, i ended up kicking him in the balls, but in my defense i thought i was a football punter, and his ballsack was a football. no joke i was high as balls, i didn't realize what i had done until he looked up at me with those eyes, oh those eyes. i was scared shitless.

[–]hotgirl99 1 point2 points ago

"Don't Run boys" is the common one when with my friENTs

[–]Djugdish 1 point2 points ago

Your mother got a wooden leg with a kickstand, motherfucker!

[–]danyukhin 1 point2 points ago

I once hit a friend of mine in the eye with my elbow for doing that

[–]shady_alley_groper 1 point2 points ago

i can here his exact voice as this gif plays

[–]bsmartt 1 point2 points ago

I totally agree with this. Also girls: don't joke around about pregnancy.

[–]Dammit182 1 point2 points ago

One kid came over once and knocked on the door like a cop would. My friend didn't let him toke with us after that and made the kid leave. This should be done to everybody that does this to show them it's not something to joke around about.

[–]Ashton42 1 point2 points ago

eddie murphy yelling at his future self.

[–]GoPro 1 point2 points ago

delirious and raw are some of the funniest stand ups in my opinion

[–]brannonbuckley 1 point2 points ago

I have a friend (now a firENT, I got him high for the first time), who used to pull that shit all the time. He thought it was really funny until someone threatened to kick his ass if he did it again.

[–]Immortal_Fishy 1 point2 points ago

Me and my friends always used to have a ritual where after smoking weed in the fairgrounds, we'd run away from "fake cops" every time.

Not sure how it started but eventually, someone would shout "Fake Cops!" and we'd all run away.

Usually the running got the THC to hit us quicker, so it was funny as hell, as well as useful.

[–]MomoBlunts 0 points1 point ago

I hate that, kinda buzzkill when im already into it.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Big_Greeno 6 points7 points ago

Serious question, why did you feel it was ok for you to ruin other peoples good time? Is this a "just because I felt like it" thing? You do realize that is the justification sociopaths use, right?

[–]Theadaminski 0 points1 point ago

No it wasn't that i felt it was ok, it was a mix of a few things that led to us actually doing it. Overall it was really just me and my freinds being drunk assholes.

[–]triobot 4 points5 points ago

RES saved as the cunt who cried cops