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top 200 commentsshow all 246

[–]pcd84 73 points74 points ago

Watch it be the account of a redditor who is self-conscious about their weight. NICE ONE

[–]thescrapplekid 6 points7 points ago

Looking at the other Submitted history... might be`

[–]windwrangler 102 points103 points ago

That there is a fiiiine looking cow. Yessiree, fiiiine lookin.

[–]CTRL_ALT_RAPE 74 points75 points ago

ಠ◡ಠ

[–]Joseph445 41 points42 points ago

Your username frightens me.

[–]CTRL_ALT_RAPE 86 points87 points ago

[–]compromised_account 24 points25 points ago

:) No longer scared.

[–]Obi_wan_The_cannoli 11 points12 points ago

If you were the original poster of this, your username would be incredibly relevant.

[–]CTRL_ALT_RAPE 10 points11 points ago

compromised_anus

[–]compromised_account 7 points8 points ago

What do you mean? My name is Joseph445.....Can't you see?

[–]Lurking_Grue 2 points3 points ago

Sooo... what are you wearing?

[–]juandl13 279 points280 points ago

Moo bitch, get out the hay.

[–]why_not_this_name 51 points52 points ago

[–]bleedRnge 20 points21 points ago

I just spent like 30 minutes on that website. I think this is my favorite.

[–]MotherFuckingCupcake 8 points9 points ago

It may be because I'm a drunk bitch, but that was hilarious.

[–]VVolfie 2 points3 points ago

Are you me?

[–]ajkkjjk52 8 points9 points ago

As both MotherFuckingCupcake and VVolfie, I can confirm this.

[–]Hellrazor236 2 points3 points ago

Why does that not have a volume slider?

[–]mylopolis 2 points3 points ago

so loud ><

[–]littlefork 5 points6 points ago

The website you linked to is awesome!

[–]tstone433 10 points11 points ago

[–]gedSGU 1 point2 points ago

never seen this one in upvote context !!!! damn clever !!!!!

[–]zaraphiston 1 point2 points ago

This is possibly the best web site in the face of Catania

[–]DemonMuffins 0 points1 point ago

I cows ate grass and whatever growth hormones we gave them.

[–]shazaam 107 points108 points ago

God-speed knights of new. The torrent of 'account logged in' posts are coming.

[–]Hellrazor236 34 points35 points ago

Welcome to circlejerk, where the posts are made up and the points don't matter!

[–]okmkz 8 points9 points ago

CIRCLEJERK LEVEL: POTATO

[–]SOMETHING_POTATO 3 points4 points ago

Fuck you.

[–]Trentos 34 points35 points ago

To be fair he didn't say that it was NOT his account. Just an account. I mean today I went to my computer and found an account logged in as well... gimme karma I guess.

[–]kaivr 1 point2 points ago

While others are going to leave their accounts logged on everywhere...

[–]uk_randomer 1 point2 points ago

Your logic is undeniable

[–]mywhitewolf 0 points1 point ago

kicking your self for not posting a cow now aren't you?

[–]chuckFKNdiesel 0 points1 point ago

But... I leave my account logged in all the time.

[–]youRheaDiSoNfirE 0 points1 point ago

I like the 'I guess' at the end.

[–]lalondtm 1 point2 points ago

true. Anybody can say "found this account logged in, heres ______" when really its just another karma-whore

[–]TheBassCave 1 point2 points ago

I seriously hope that a culture of 'Reddit-raping' doesn't start. This isn't Facebook.

[–]20127010603170562316 1 point2 points ago

I fear it is too late.

I mentioned it yesterday, and apparently we should just downvote and move on. Which would be fine, except these shitty posts tend to get a lot of people who are not me upvoting them to the top of my page.

[–]olosh 16 points17 points ago

Atom heart mother.

[–]smallz2011 1 point2 points ago

Udderly...Breast Milky...

[–]4danno 408 points409 points ago

I think your just milking reddit for some karma

[–]Bower69 207 points208 points ago

*you're

[–]Dcgoodwin1 96 points97 points ago

Welcome...

[–]MrPeepers32 16 points17 points ago

[–]The_Painted_Man 38 points39 points ago

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points ago

[–]mndg 1 point2 points ago

Sarah McLachlan "Angel"

[–]dan2737 1 point2 points ago

I know that cow from somewhere....

[–]Fr3nZy 0 points1 point ago

Hideki!

[–]EvanMacIan 2 points3 points ago

To...

[–]Dcgoodwin1 1 point2 points ago

MY ANUS!!!!

[–]trevklug1 0 points1 point ago

MY ANGUS!!!!

[–]Lurking_Grue 0 points1 point ago

This makes alot of sense.

[–]Apollo64 9 points10 points ago

Good Guy Redditor purposely makes grammar/spelling mistakes so that other people get karma for correcting him.

[–]bob-a-rama 5 points6 points ago

Reddit

[–]Bendrake 38 points39 points ago

[–]JamesDK1 19 points20 points ago

Would someone really someone would do that, just go on the internet and tell lies?

[–]SuperWolf 4 points5 points ago

People don't do that.

[–]Bendrake 4 points5 points ago

Why would anyone on the Internet lie?

[–]Abedeus 1 point2 points ago

Sweet, juicy lick of karma.

[–]trixter21992251 2 points3 points ago

*.

[–]SuperWolf 1 point2 points ago

People don't do that.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]fuzzb0y 40 points41 points ago

I like how you just udderly avoided a good chance for a pun.

[–]Aninjaassassin 22 points23 points ago

Don't start this train you better Moove on.

[–]Elrode 20 points21 points ago

There is no bull about this picture.

[–]Beefy_G 13 points14 points ago

I don't know why people beef on these pun runs.

[–]laggymclagster 11 points12 points ago

Frankly it's just a load of bull shit.

[–]limesonapony 8 points9 points ago

Plus his story is pretty spotty.

[–]Brash_Attack 11 points12 points ago

He can just kiss my dairyerre.

[–]eekmina 4 points5 points ago

I think his story is pretty black and white actually.

[–]dizneedave 0 points1 point ago

CMGvend claims the person who posted this is a friend. "Found this account logged on to a computer" is a bit of a stretch at the very least.

[–]PapauNewGuinea 0 points1 point ago

It's possible that there was another person there who did not know whose computer it was. Also, who leaves their computer at a friends house? One does not simply forget about their computer.

[–]williaw 0 points1 point ago

I think it's was someone else that posted the cow. I looked at his post history and it is pretty out of character relative to his other posts/activity. I feel like a stalker.

[–]drawingshitforyou 10 points11 points ago

[–]TerrorBite 2 points3 points ago

I've got a fever...

and there's only one prescription.

[–]drawingshitforyou 1 point2 points ago

I was hoping someone would notice

[–]NoHero3s 7 points8 points ago

Congrats! Here you go.

[–]rasputine 70 points71 points ago

[–]Valdair 89 points90 points ago

Guys... we're literally upvoting a cow...

[–]Brash_Attack 42 points43 points ago

Better than upvoting a rock.

...or figuratively upvoting a cow...

[–]Kela3000 116 points117 points ago

[–]P3ngu1n48 16 points17 points ago

I can Almost see a face in there

[–]Admiral_Sarcasm 6 points7 points ago

[–]P3ngu1n48 12 points13 points ago

[–]Hellrazor236 2 points3 points ago

[–]nameandnumber 1 point2 points ago

[–]claspell 1 point2 points ago

[–]sonicoliver 5 points6 points ago

[–]MonkeyGut 1 point2 points ago

I tried so hard not to, but I just had to do it...

[–]ajkkjjk52 1 point2 points ago

Oh, I do, I do.

[–]CTRL_ALT_RAPE 3 points4 points ago

Wait, how do I literally upvote a cow?

[–]fs337 5 points6 points ago

This is reddit. What do you expect?

[–]qrystalballer 1 point2 points ago

Someone made fun of me for using literally incorrectly today. I stood my ground and explained how said object was actually made of feces. It was a fine day.

[–]rasputine 1 point2 points ago

Unfortunately, "literally" is an auto-antonym.

It means both "in the literal sense" and "in the superlative figurative sense". Thanks for nothing, English!

[–]The_Painted_Man 7 points8 points ago

[–]kyle1qaz7ujm 10 points11 points ago

Found this account logged on to a graham cracker.

[–]CAPT_OBVlOUS 14 points15 points ago

That is a big cow.

[–]StewieBanana 25 points26 points ago

No it's just a small picture.

[–]Tallain 3 points4 points ago

Tee hee.

[–]quornonthecob 0 points1 point ago

[–]Admiral_Sarcasm 2 points3 points ago

Thank you Captain Obvious.

[–]sagex90 0 points1 point ago

[–]plazmamuffin 1 point2 points ago

Got what?

[–]kirovreporting 4 points5 points ago

Ahhh... the daily CMGvend cow post! Looking forward to freckle-Friday!

[–]ILoveAMp 4 points5 points ago

As a Wisconsinite I am obligated to upvote this.

[–]Mastuh 0 points1 point ago

Same, need more cheese

[–]Ragnarok2kx 4 points5 points ago

cows you say?

[–]ParkerM 21 points22 points ago

Welp, looks like it's finally time to unsubscribe from this subreddit.

[–]typicallyoffensive 8 points9 points ago

Yeah, who upvotes this shit?

[–]QuasarsRcool 9 points10 points ago

This site is comprised of so many gullible people

[–]angrylawyer 0 points1 point ago

hey guys upvote this comment, I found it logged into a computer at my house!

[–]entbeard 1 point2 points ago

[–]IHaveNoNipples 1 point2 points ago

This might be the easiest conspiracy ever.

[–]PapauNewGuinea 0 points1 point ago

I'd say second easiest. First has to be "Look at what my girlfriend found." Sure, your girlfriend found it. Or maybe "I forgot about this old NES in the basement. I just dug it out."

[–]rashondala 2 points3 points ago

I found my account logged on my computer. here's nothing

[–]PracticeGuide 2 points3 points ago

I'm going to start leaving my reddit account logged in at random places. Maybe it will get me some of this elusive Karma you all talk about.

[–]Nitrous42 4 points5 points ago

[–]darkside17 1 point2 points ago

Did you leave the OP a note? Did you post anything else? Who are you? I demand answers! Unless you're GGG. But then again, GGG would just log you out and then PM about the incident.

[–]bfro 5 points6 points ago

GGG get's forgetful redditors karma and then logs out.... he is doing it right.

[–]darkside17 0 points1 point ago

Makes sense. Good Guy Greg strikes again.

[–]brittanynewf 1 point2 points ago

Oh my god. I fucking love cows.

[–]bronymobile 2 points3 points ago

*I love fucking cows. FTFY

[–]Decatf 1 point2 points ago

Where was Jim Cramer telling me to invest in other peoples logged in accounts? I fear I have missed to boat on this one.

[–]MetalJunior 1 point2 points ago

I must remember to leave my Reddit account logged in everywhere I go so some random yahoo can post something and get me shitloads of delicious karma...

[–]philtomato 1 point2 points ago

cow i moo you bovin..............fuck this i suck at cow puns.

[–]UnoriginalMike 1 point2 points ago

Should have posted to r/gonewild.

[–]Speedingturtle 1 point2 points ago

CHEESEMOO?

[–]m_goss 1 point2 points ago

cat would gotten you move karma

[–]somecallmemike 1 point2 points ago

Wow, I was thinking about milking this for karma, but it's gone to far already.

[–]audiomatt 1 point2 points ago

acownt?

[–]Absocold 1 point2 points ago

obviously upvote the guy with no reddit sense

[–]westdonkeykong 1 point2 points ago

This shit needs to stop.

[–]butter_my_fingers 1 point2 points ago

[–]LeBossk 1 point2 points ago

This guy got 1200+ karma by posting a picture of a cow on what he claims to not be his account.

[–]MatttyV 1 point2 points ago

Upvote because not cat.

[–]knighmare 1 point2 points ago

pretend to get hacked = free good guy karma

[–]anal-razor 1 point2 points ago

i call bullshit, pun intended, your last post was 3 days ago. one does not simply log on after 3 days and not comment.

[–]Knowing_nate 1 point2 points ago

How to get karma in three easy steps.

  1. find a public computer. ie. At a Mac store
  2. log into reddit and leave the browser open.
  3. leave the room. congrats you got karma.

[–]IDangleFreely 1 point2 points ago

  1. Lie about pretending to be someone else and post picture of cow with wacky story.

[–]IplayTheGuitarBetter 1 point2 points ago

WOAH!! A new way to karma whore!! You're either completely honest, or are a circlejerk innovator.

[–]The_Time_Lord 1 point2 points ago

The Karma Cow

Milking it for all it's worth

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Why in the fuck does this have upvotes? Seriously.

[–]its_over_2250 5 points6 points ago

This is udderly amazing!

[–]AtomikRadio 4 points5 points ago

TIL you can get a thousand karma for posting a picture of a cow standing there if you say it's not your account.

Also, AtomikRadio left herself logged in at the library. What an idiot, I'm going to post this comment with it.

[–]chrisfs 0 points1 point ago

See if you had posted a cow on your own post, rather than commenting on another person's you could have 1000 karma as well.

[–]sisleyek 1 point2 points ago

Good Guy Stranger giving a random redditor some cow karma <3

[–]OldPete 1 point2 points ago

My favorite thing about posts like this is as of this posting, 1,495 people have taken the time to downvote this cow. What kind of mind motivates that kind of action? "Not even this guy's account....and it's a DAMNED COW!?!?!?! DOWNVOTE! DOWNVOTE! DOWNVOTE! DOWNVOTE!"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

There's a cow on the front page. Redditors are so easily amused...

[–]nacho93 0 points1 point ago

An ad invaded the pictures space which said " let god be the source of love in your marriage", making this post alot funnier. Without it it was meh.

[–]dodecahedonist 0 points1 point ago

You play league of legends, and go to drexel. Interesting.

[–]i_pk_pjers_i 0 points1 point ago

TIL a picture of a cow will net you about 1000 link karma.

[–]GalaxySC 0 points1 point ago

When I was getting my edumacation in Community College. I use to love checking email and social links every time I would use a public computer. I turned straight people gay and sent lots of angry emails to friends.

[–]TerrorBite 1 point2 points ago

Joke's on you, I'm already gay!

[–]GalaxySC 0 points1 point ago

Ha I bet TerrorBite friend would be like" dude we know stop bragging about it"

[–]molmu 0 points1 point ago

[–]zandermoo 0 points1 point ago

I've been trolling the "new" - this is becoming a thing. Let's not reward these malefactors.

[–]sentenseifrel 0 points1 point ago

Moo Moo Cow Level?

[–]sailawaysail 0 points1 point ago

Welcome everyone, this is why reddit sucks these days.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Cow has a cow face on its side......see it?

[–]Whats_a_narwhal 0 points1 point ago

How in the hell did this mange to rake in so much Karma ಠ_ಠ

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Cause this website is full of fucking morons.

[–]juliusaurus 0 points1 point ago

Well done.

[–]chrisfs 0 points1 point ago

You are quite a nice person considering what could have been done.

[–]moopigmoo 0 points1 point ago

Yay! I love cows!

[–]recoil669 0 points1 point ago

I used the exact same cow to milk some Karma for the diablo 3 release. Karma I hang my head in shame to have collected now.

[–]uiouyug 0 points1 point ago

Fuck Cows!

[–]Pacblu202 0 points1 point ago

GG Redditor, finds a computer logged into reddit, gets them a front page post.

[–]Drunken-Nose-Picker 0 points1 point ago

You have no proof.

[–]tehrabbitt 0 points1 point ago

Good Guy Stranger,

Finds Random Redditor's account logged in, Posts picture of cow, Makes front page. ಠ_ಠ

[–]GhostalMedia 0 points1 point ago

Cow.

[–]PirateMug 0 points1 point ago

I don't understand. Why is this on the front page?

[–]OnionShew 0 points1 point ago

Beautiful.

[–]BlueSnake187 0 points1 point ago

Oh I get it, cash cow right??

[–]JackBread 0 points1 point ago

They're not lying.

Their account is logged into their computer.

[–]knowledgeispower1 0 points1 point ago

[–]TheKooze 0 points1 point ago

http://i.imgur.com/PujOi.jpg

Couldn't help but think of Pink Floyd here.

[–]Pawtang 0 points1 point ago

He's unlocked the secret phrase of Karma - "found this account logged in", post pic, and ride the karma train

[–]ledanser 0 points1 point ago

To think a picture of a cow can get so much upvotes.

[–]Evil_AppleJuice 0 points1 point ago

A rock did better. Welcome to reddit.

[–]discopowerpack 0 points1 point ago

I like how this cow got OP most, if not all, of his link karma.

And he doesn't even know it.

[–]Offensive_Username2 0 points1 point ago

I don't believe you.

[–]Dankycheese 0 points1 point ago

Is this a new trend?

[–]elastic-craptastic 0 points1 point ago

I'm guessing it was your account logged into your computer....

[–]daxl70 0 points1 point ago

Im gonna leave my account open everywhere hoping a redditor finds it and gives me karma

[–]ChalkyJones 0 points1 point ago

I'm just gonna start leaving myself logged in at random computers in my schools library

[–]Indigoma 0 points1 point ago

Lol cows are silly.

[–]LeapingLemon 0 points1 point ago

Did somebody say cowmedes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_7QoyOr4pE

[–]SamHarris1 0 points1 point ago

i dont know what i was expecting when i clicked on the link...

[–]Lyall18 0 points1 point ago

The fact that I have no karma and it seems to be this easy is almost depressing, then I remember it doesn't count for shit in real life....

[–]Calebcummings 0 points1 point ago

I agree with the preceeding comment. It is a sturdy cow if iv ever seen one. Yup

[–]CSargeP 0 points1 point ago

That fucking cow!

[–]Twish 0 points1 point ago

I was waiting for it to do something, haha!

[–]hells_cowbells 0 points1 point ago

The cow says "Mooooo".

[–]o-hanraha-hanrahan 0 points1 point ago

Mildly interesting: someone fraped me a while ago and used this exact same image as my display picture

[–]enphaux 0 points1 point ago

This is Reddit now...

[–]Ry_Guy19 0 points1 point ago

[–]skyclown 0 points1 point ago

looked for account holder comment, not there, still doesn't know?

[–]anofficerofthelawl 0 points1 point ago

Its a nice cow.