Why I don't have any friends

jokes_on_you · 2 months

If you're wondering, this is from the Hyperbole and a Half webcomic.

DrEMR · 2 months

You just described my life.

PauseforBong · 2 months

It's okay. Us introverts have to keep the internet alive while everyone else isnt watching.

-Edit: The world needs introverts just as much as people who are going out and being social. Most people are most focused and productive when they are alone. It is perfectly acceptable to not want to be social most of the time. Obviously many people actively disobey their own desires to just be alone and instead create unnecessary social situations just to justify their boredom. For those of you still skeptical about your own acceptance as an introvert, this helped me out a lot: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0KYU2j0TM4

criticalnegation · 2 months

alone time is highly underrated.

Spatchoola · 2 months

Seems you and I have a lot in common. We shouldn't meet up!

AlphaRedditor · 2 months

You could always go to a coffee shop or something...and sit there in front of your computer, ignoring everyone.

Mr_Mimiseku · 2 months

I have friends, and I occasionally hang out. But the last couple of weeks, nobody has wanted to hang out with me. And nobody usually ever asks me to hang out, I'm the one doing the asking. So I stay at home. They are like, "Dude, you gotta be social." I'm like, "I TRY. NOBODY WANTS TO DO ANYTHING." I really feel left out of the loop, and sometimes it really hurts my feelings. I see some really good friends post to facebook, "That was a great night." With so and so and 12 others. (All of which being my friends.) I'm just like, "You know what, fuck it. I'm staying home and gonna be on reddit and play the elder scrolls for the rest of the summer." Well, I just blurted my feelings out to the internet, even though nobody cares...it's probably because my username means "Cat piss."

m_bird13 · 2 months

You graduate high school, go to community college as your HS friends go far away and never make contact again, so youre left alone with the task of making new friends. Add anxiety + shitty social skills, youve got a bad mix. But you have to talk to new people and connect and get invited to stuff or else you get depressed and lonely and blue. Honestly, being alone in the house is so much easier.

DaTScientisT · 2 months

Be grateful people are even asking you to hang out.

Marski · 2 months

[deleted]

Valkes · 2 months

I don't have friends because I'm a paranoid narcissist and a pathological ass hat.

jrghoull · 2 months

F**k it!!!!!

25/m/boston area who is doing a 2nd major in computer science.

any dudes (or dudettes I guess) roughly my age who are looking for people to hang out with (talk about reddit, video games, sci fi, whatever) message me.

(laughs) I feel like i'm trying to solicit a date or something. Honestly though, I have no friends, and I figure that reddit must be full of dudes that I could hang out with.

Toobad113 · 2 months

Why leave when it's 98 degrees outside and cool inside

PhiladelphiaIrish · 2 months

Allie recently suffered a bout of severe depression, and is still getting over it. Go meet people.

dont_press_ctrl-W · 2 months

Here's the advice I received:

Don't skip any date/appointment/meeting you set with someone.
Never say no to something unless it conflicts with rule 1. or with common sense.

I've never felt so well. I've stopped stupidly saying no to stuff in order to spend all this precious time in front of my stupid computer.

devinliam · 2 months

All my friends think I hate them when really im just more of a hang out twice a month kind of guy. Being introverted has really hurt a lot of my relationships and I wish I could convey how it feels to people. It's not personal I just love relaxing alone!

Zoidberg-thuggin · 2 months

How is this funny?

walkinthecow · 2 months

I honestly dont have any active frindships right now. Family? Sure. Friends from back in the day? Check. Work 'friends'? Yup. Do I ever do anything with them just for fun. No.

It's actually a serious issue for me. It is one of the many obstacles of being in recovery. A recovering addict learns that "drug buddies" are NOT friends. Most of us have alienated ourselves from our old friends, and have literally forgotten how to socialize without the help of drugs/alcohol. My counselors are constantly on me about how important human interaction is (I'm not a hermit, mind you) but I'm just not into it.

MySixInchTaint · 2 months

Some of us actually choose not to have friends.

I'm fully capable of conversing with others, but I choose to keep to myself. I choose to avoid all of the responsibilities that come with friendships.

I may be labeled as "weird," but that's not my problem. I'm comfortable being by myself and doing things on my own.

Llevel · 2 months

I think right now is a good time to point out what /r/Calgary has done. We had a few meetups and decided we all liked each other, so we started up /r/CalgarySocialClub to arrange meetups on a regular basis. We're all pretty socially awkward, but when you put a bunch of people together like that, they eventually find something in common and become friends.

The /r/CalgarySocialClub is a great way to meet new people and is a ton of fun. We also have a Facebook group setup for the more regular people and have almost 90 people in there. It's a great group of people and is totally worth setting up for your local subreddit.

We started off by going for drinks a couple times, but now we go camping, hiking, play soccer, softball, ultimate (Frisbee), wings/ribs nights, see movies, and tons of other stuff. I've made a ton of new awesome friends that have a lot in common and it's totally worth trying to get one setup.

The Calgary social club has on average about one event a day, so if any Calgarians want to drop into ours, they're more than welcome.

Of course if you're more introverted and want to stay in, that's fine too, but was the same way and I find life to be much more enjoyable with the occasional outing. I still find myself spending several days a week at home just on my computer, but having the option to go out is fantastic.

bastian1343 · 2 months

So the fuck what?

Does the choice to dick around on the internet really need justification when the alternative is dicking around in a bar somewhere?

malmac · 2 months

Staying home in the present age, for one thing, doesn't mean being isolated. In addition, it saves gas and money, I can read, watch documentary programs to enrich my mind, practice my hand drumming, drawing, and other hobbies. I am there to pet and walk my dog. It keeps me healthier because I don't drink when I am by myself.

I guess, in a way, I feel like it makes me a little more interesting when I do go out and socialize, I generally have some exposure to current events and the solitude lets me formulate my own opinion rather than simply parroting the groupthink.

But if you are alone and lonely, or too phobic to socialize, in that case I feel bad for you. In my case, I am good at filling my time and I just prefer it that way.

misterwhite999 · 2 months

/r/introvert would appreciate this

yousedditreddit · 2 months

Right in the feels man. this hit too close to home

fucksinparallel · 2 months

I was introverted for a while. The bad kind. The kind where I wanted to be around people, but I never felt welcome. I'd spend 10 minutes on a text saying, "Hey dude, lets hang out!!!" or some variant. I realized a couple things. First of all, I have to force myself to be happy and take risks. My mind defaults to self pity; picking myself up is like stopping procrastinating on some paper. It's hard, but I need some sort of change. Second, people don't want to have to text their friends. Those are the semi-friends. The real friends are the ones you see at the bar/other misc. location every night and shoot the shit without having to ask them if they want to come. Think Good Will Hunting or How I Met Your Mother. You think those motherfuckers text their buds every night? No. That's when I realized those 1-3 texts I got from friends in the beginning of my sophomore year were, "Hey, lets be friends this year!", not "Hey, come hang out but don't assume you're invited in the future!"

kharmakazy · 2 months

Blow off ALL the friends!

stopmakingsense · 2 months

I think it's important to make a distinction for the people that identify with this comic. The reason this resonates is not the same for everyone.

Many are genuine introverts who prefer significant periods of isolation as way to reflect and "recharge" themselves. The 'shame' they feel is societal pressure that values extroverted behavior. Eventually these people learn to let that go and value their own means of interpersonal interaction. Basically they stop giving a fuck what other people might think and just enjoy their alone time.

The other group... and I suspect many in this thread fall into this category... are not genuine introverts. Some are extremely extroverted and crave interpersonal interactions. THEIR problem is they live with an enormous amount of shame that inhibits comfortable interaction with other people. They worry too much what other people are thinking, which makes them uncomfortable in social settings. Their best recourse is to challenge this fear over and over and over again until it gradually lessons.

moobaby · 2 months

This happens a lot to me. I'm confused if I'm introverted/anti-social. I like being around others and believe my life's purpose is to improve human well-being in some way, but at the same time I hate people and their baggage. It's like a double standard or something :/

morphintime · 2 months

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.

Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.

Um, who says? A few years ago I'd have scored a pretty strong introvert on tests like the one here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion#Measurement

Now I'd be a fairly strong extrovert. Moving out of home and going to college changed me.

TheM1RACLE · 2 months

This is on the front page? Are you fucking shitting me?

gaiaap · 2 months

Yes, it's one of my favorite things too. You and I have so much in common, let's never meet.

kayvman · 2 months

You're an introvert. Same here. Nothing to be ashamed of. Though you should at least find a couple people you like to be around. There is no law that says you have to be around people all the time.

tlp248 · 2 months

ugh i wish she'd post a new story soon!

TallonWarrior · 2 months

Friends?

MisterWonka · 2 months

This doesn't belong in funny. Unless my life is funny.

Mapes · 2 months

Whatever happened to Allie? (creator of Hyperbole and a Half). What is she up to?

OompaOrangeFace · 2 months

It's so true it hurts.

40ozToFreedom · 2 months

The house will always be there...friends won't...

Calicove1904 · 2 months

Tonight is one of the many where I was thinking this as I told someone I couldn't hang out. Bowls and sleeping solo for this chick tonight.. Among many others.. sometimes being alone Is awesome.

TehTechnoGuy · 2 months

/r/introvert

Dieudonne · 2 months

I'm pretty sure everyone deals with this feeling to some extent.. Thats what I hope anyway

geniusgrunt · 2 months

What about us ambiverts? How many of us are there in comparison to extreme extroverts and introverts I wonder? I imagine that most people fall within a spectrum of far left extroversion to far right introversion (if you imagine it similar to the political spectrum with no political context) and everything in between.

From Wiki:

Although many people view being introverted or extroverted as a question with only two possible answers, most contemporary trait theories measure levels of extraversion-introversion as part of a single, continuous dimension of personality, with some scores near one end, and others near the half-way mark.[9] Ambiversion is a term used to describe people who fall more or less directly in the middle and exhibit tendencies of both groups.[3][10] An ambivert is normally comfortable with groups and enjoys social interaction, but also relishes time alone and away from the crowd.

gradius10 · 2 months

I read this in GLaDOS's voice.

alephlovedbeth · 2 months

starting a ravenloft campaign isn't that hard. just ask around. i'd play.

TouretteGuy · 2 months

Well I used to be more like this, now I'd rather live my life more like the "yes man" movie. Everytime someone texts me or asks me to hang out somewhere, even if I don't really feel like it, I tell them-COCKSUCKER

sour_ · 2 months

all i need in this life of sin is me and my girlfriend

Bocani · 2 months

"I'd love to hang out, but...I'd rather surf reddit."

mbiastock · 2 months

It's much easier to take this point of view now that we have the internet.

daedalus733 · 2 months

What's funny about this? Yes, that probably is why you don't have friends. Do you want friends? Then don't do that, maybe.

MySixInchTaint · 2 months

One of the most beautiful things about being Human is the ability to choose among many different lifestyles. I choose to be solitary, you choose to say "fuck all that." I still smile at stuff.

oD3 · 2 months

I've overcome this problem by having most social gatherings / parties at my place.

kkkarlftw · 2 months

It's hard for me to make friends because I find it hard to have a that certain kind of friendship that makes them want me. I seem to just be a social butterfly who everyone doesn't hate, but not that one who they'll love to spend time with :(

pistashley_O · 2 months

Things like this make me feel so much better about myself. I'm gonna stay home alone, but with reddit we're alone together...

;]

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