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all 142 comments

[–]TurboFuel 71 points72 points ago

upvoted for spagett

[–]ObeseSnake 11 points12 points ago

I upvote all things Spagett.

[–]DigitallyGeeking 4 points5 points ago

Spagett.

[–]ThorManhammer 20 points21 points ago

Spooked ya!

[–]SquidManHero -1 points0 points ago

Came here to say this, not disappointed.

[–]DrTuggDagless 9 points10 points ago

OOH SPAGHETT - OOPS CIGARETTE!

[–]bendy_banana 5 points6 points ago

juice

[–]digitalbastard 23 points24 points ago

flying SPAGETT monster?

[–]AceDecade 6 points7 points ago

SPAGHETT!

[–]YoureMyBoyBloo 7 points8 points ago

I am 100% positvie this is how this whole thing will end.

[–]I_guess_this_will_do 1 point2 points ago

MINUTE LONG AD FOR A MINUTE LONG VIDEO?!?!?!?!?

AHHGHGHGH!

Sorry about that - not your fault.

[–]pbj192 6 points7 points ago

Whatev I'm behind seven proxies, come at me.

[–]angrypikachu 0 points1 point ago

I got you. I found out you must have sort of affection for peanut butter and jelly. Take that proxy!

[–]pbj192 0 points1 point ago

That actually has nothing to do with what it means

[–]slapdashbr 17 points18 points ago

All six or seven muslims on reddit must be pissed

[–]Gravyness 2 points3 points ago

We better start running...

[–]egamer01 1 point2 points ago

why do we need exercise ?

[–]VeteranKamikaze 6 points7 points ago

SPAGETT hops out from behind plant, blows self up in crowded mall

[–]justpeter 5 points6 points ago

Good News! Cigarette Juice!

[–]a-t-k 29 points30 points ago

Every fundamentalist has the potential to react violently, regardless of religion.

[–]FFVIINanaki 7 points8 points ago

I've yet to see Jainist fundamentalists murder somebody.

As Sam Harris said(paraphrased), it's not that religious fundamentalists are inherently violent, it's that the largest religions' fundamentals are inherently violent.

[–]TheActualAWdeV 0 points1 point ago

I've yet to see Jainist fundamentalists murder somebody.

Kekeke. I see what you did there.

[–]a-t-k 0 points1 point ago

Maybe we use different definitions of what a religious fundamentalist is: a religious fundamentalist bases everything else, every decision and every though on his religion. He is not dangerous because he would die for his religion, but because he would let you die for his religion, too.

[–]TheActualAWdeV 6 points7 points ago

Thing about Jainism is that they're holy hell incredibly pacifist. If a jainist is a fundamentalist and bases every decision on his religion then he is not a threat because a core part of his religion is pacifism.

Sincerely, the committee for explaining obvious jokes.

[–]FuhQue 1 point2 points ago

I bet that isn't even a real committee.

[–]TheActualAWdeV 0 points1 point ago

No. No it is not.

Kind regards, the non-existent committee.

[–]Aitioma 2 points3 points ago

a religious fundamentalist bases everything else, every decision and every though on his religion.

Exactly.

And precisely because of that definition a Jainist fundamentalist will be inherently less likely in every way to murder people compared to, for example, a fundemantalist Muslim (a religion whose major religious texts explicitly condone or even propagate murder (e.g. homosexuals, etc.)).

He is not dangerous because he would die for his religion, but because he would let you die for his religion, too.

There are religions for which that's true and other religions for which it is not. For Islam it is most certainly true. For Jainists that's very doubtful.

[–]patio87 14 points15 points ago

Some of much more likely to than others.

[–]esoteric_reference 11 points12 points ago

One musn't be intimidated by the threat of violence. Some things are important enough to fight for, even to die for.

[–]Pigydood 12 points13 points ago

Like BACON

[–]Zempie 2 points3 points ago

I now understand the symbolism of the scarlet A.

[–]wimmyjales 0 points1 point ago

Put your money where your mouth is. Draw a picture of mohammed, take a photo of it next to your face, and post it for the world to see.

[–]obillion 3 points4 points ago

I hope you are including extremist patriotic militia hate groups who are staunchly Christian amongst those that are more likely To act out violently.

[–]patio87 2 points3 points ago

As soon as the patriotic militia "hate" groups run a plane into the Willis tower, come back and talk to me.

[–]primitive_screwhead 2 points3 points ago

Does bombing day care count?

[–]patio87 -2 points-1 points ago

Of course it does. I am not being absolute, everything is in context and comparison if you read my comments.

[–]primitive_screwhead 1 point2 points ago

Ok. Then, here I am, coming back to talk to you. What's up?

[–]obillion 2 points3 points ago

they don't need to bring a tower down. think of the lives ruined by hate and violence perpetrated by this hate and covered in christian interpretation or miss interpretation in various ethnic communities. if you believe a building to be a more telling sign than the lives that have been and continue being affected by hate then something is wrong.

[–]egamer01 0 points1 point ago

You do realize that speeding in your car is more likely to kill you in America then a terrorist attack. Do you ever go over the speed limit ?

[–]Spectro87 0 points1 point ago

Abortion doc killers and Planned Parenthood/women's clinic bombers as well.

[–]dumnezero 1 point2 points ago

as Sam Harris would say, a fundamentalist of Jainism will not react violently, as non-violence is explicitly fundamental.

[–]horriblydishonest 3 points4 points ago

In the 21st century Muslims are the most violent religion followed by the jews (due to Israel) , and then christians. *Note direct in the name of religion violence.

[–]Aitioma 1 point2 points ago

Abrahamic religions are a fucking cancer to human society.

Literally everything would be better without it and it brings absolutely no additional good to this world that can't be achieved differently.

[–]a-t-k 0 points1 point ago

The interesting thing about religion is that one can justify the vilest atrocities and take credit for the most glorious deeds in the name of every of them.

[–]Aitioma 1 point2 points ago

Nah.

To cite one of the most simple counterarguments to your statement as stated by Christopher Hitchens:

“Can you name a single moral action performed, or a moral statement said by a believer that a non believer could have not said or done?”
pause
“Now, can you name a wicked thing that was done solely based on religion? You didn’t have to think twice did you?”

[–]a-t-k 0 points1 point ago

Makes sense.

[–]Angeldust01 -3 points-2 points ago

I'd say the christians have the biggest body count of last decade. Followed by Israel, then muslims(maybe, cba to check sources really)

[–]horriblydishonest 1 point2 points ago

What is your definition of Christian? You may not realize that Christians themselves have not declared a holy war in the last 10 years while there have been multiple calls of the Islam holy war Jihad on the west multiple times leading to a high fatality count in both the middle east and west. If you are counting the US as a "christian" country then well you're just a troll and I feel like a moron for replying.

Edit: For anyone who may be interested in numbers here was a quick search run down. http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Peace/osloterr.html http://old.btselem.org/statistics/english/Casualties.asp http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Islamic_terrorist_attacks Not many christian attacks at all in the last 10 years, but here is a forum where the original poster is looking back to WWII http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x2388647 Don't bring up the stupid Kony2012 bullshit as that would just be ignorant to the facts.

[–]Angeldust01 -1 points0 points ago

Well, what is your definion of Muslims? Are you claiming that all muslims are on Jihad against the western countries, or could these calls for holy wars be considered similiar to western church leaders calling war against muslims?

If you are counting the US as a "christian" country then well you're just a troll and I feel like a moron for replying.

Well, last time I checked, nearly 80% of americans were christians. What makes a muslim country then if majority of population is not good indicator?

You list terrorist attacks, but don't count the body count from Iraq or Afganistan? I dont think thats fair. Not all terrorism is motivated by Islam, it's part religious, part nationalistic and part of it is just anger towards the US and it's allies. Same thing with US wars against iraq and afganistan - they were motivated by religion, greed, anger, revenge and many other reasons.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casualties_of_the_Iraq_War

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civilian_casualties_in_the_War_in_Afghanistan_%282001%E2%80%93present%29

Those wars might not be religious by themselves, but they damn surely are at least partly religously motivated, like terrorism. G. W. Bush himself once said "This crusade, this war on terrorism is going to take a while", and that wasn't the only time he used such rhetoric.

Christians don't need to use terrorism much because they have the armies mainly backing them up, but they still do so.. in the USA too. In fact, besides norway(who is on that list because Breivik), the US is the only western country there: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_terrorism

edit: I have to say that it's irrelevant that who has killed the most. My main gripe was that christian violence gets overlooked.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Of course, non-fundamentalists never react violently. Nope. Not one single time in the history of mankind.

[–]a-t-k 0 points1 point ago

Oh, sometimes they do. But then usually motivated by hate, fear or stupidity.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

I see. And fundamentalists react with violence out of love, courage, and wisdom.

Thanks for clearing that up. For a moment I thought that there was no difference between violent fundamentalists and violent non-fundamentalists. The more you learn, eh?

[–]a-t-k 0 points1 point ago

Do you always use straw men instead of arguments or are you just trolling?

[–]beer0clock 0 points1 point ago

Yeah but the religion of peace especially.

[–]vivifortunia 3 points4 points ago

Good News! Cigarette Juice!

[–]shadow_the_cat 3 points4 points ago

SPAGETT!

[–]MotherFuckinMontana 2 points3 points ago

I got spooked >.>

[–]Ninjew333 4 points5 points ago

what are they gonna do blow up the internet?

[–]AcolyteRB2 0 points1 point ago

They could bomb the Reddit offices or kill the CEO.

[–]Neurotikitty 1 point2 points ago

That would go over well with the American government.

[–]AcolyteRB2 0 points1 point ago

people who do those things don't really give a fuck about the consequences.

[–]Ninjew333 1 point2 points ago

If they did that America would send even more troops in and they would get their asses ripped open.

[–]broonie316 0 points1 point ago

[–]mike4D 3 points4 points ago

ITT: reddit teenagers thinking people IRL care about their stupid internet posts.

[–]leaveallyouhave23 1 point2 points ago

people have done much more for much less.

[–]CalCapone 6 points7 points ago

Who cares if they react violenty? All that'll do is buy them some more U.S soldiers shooting at them.

[–]prajwel 1 point2 points ago

oh come on. aren't we like anonymous on the internet? nobody will figure out. Wink wink

[–]froggymorning 1 point2 points ago

Yah Im pretty psyched about it. Mostly, ANYTHING that takes itself so seriously it will kill you if you draw something, needs antagonizing.

[–]egamer01 2 points3 points ago

Ahh the 4chan mentality if its big and mean poke it with a stick till its so mad it can't see strait. Then poke it some more.

[–]geezika 1 point2 points ago

Spaghett!!!!!!!

[–]Captainpanda55 1 point2 points ago

What're they gonna do? Bomb Reddit?
Haha...oh.

[–]SupermanIsNoHome 1 point2 points ago

"I thought it was the bosses' kid or something, turns out it was a full grown man"

[–]SupermanIsNoHome 1 point2 points ago

"I thought it was the bosses' kid or something, turns out it was a full grown man"

[–]CoffeeFox 1 point2 points ago

You can't carbomb the internet.

[–]EvOllj 3 points4 points ago

name a religion that doesnt react violently.

[–]rasputine 20 points21 points ago

Jainism.

[–]Taodeist 14 points15 points ago

Taoism. Just kidding, we're not a religion.

[–]cre97 22 points23 points ago

Pastafarianism

[–]FedaykinShallowGrave 9 points10 points ago

Pussy pastafarianists perhaps...If somebody blasphemed the name of Pastafarian in my presence I'd make spaghetti sauce with their heathen blood.

[–]TheActualAWdeV 6 points7 points ago

The great pastafarian schism. Hard-boiled red-sauced pastafarians on the one side, Pusstafarians on the other.

[–]egamer01 0 points1 point ago

See I would grind their bones to make in to spaghetti, but that's just me.

[–]FedaykinShallowGrave 0 points1 point ago

That is...GENIUS! Why not use both, though? We're just increasing the effectiveness of pagan punishment. That's the kind of expedience only those blessed by Pastafarian can achieve...

[–]horribledad 3 points4 points ago

Jainism.

Why are you so afraid to call certain religions out? Stop being a coward.

[–]heroman44 4 points5 points ago

Jedi.

[–]YoureMyBoyBloo 8 points9 points ago

Then what was with that whole Sith conflict?

[–]callipygian1 2 points3 points ago

luke had daddy issues.

[–]heroman44 2 points3 points ago

Hey! DON'T OPPRESS ME!

[–]TwwIX 1 point2 points ago

A lot of them turned to the dark side and committed numerous genocides.

[–]Lots42 0 points1 point ago

Sure. Have one little dispute with a dude, cut off most of his limbs and leave him burning to death on a lava field.

[–]upinflames -1 points0 points ago

Bokononism.

[–]LeetroyJnkns 0 points1 point ago

Is he fapping?

[–]wikipediaBot -1 points0 points ago

fapping:

Masturbation is the sexual stimulation of the genitals, usually to the point of orgasm. The stimulation can be performed manually, by use of objects or tools, or by some combination of these methods. Masturbation is a common form of autoeroticism, providing sexual pleasure or orgasm in the absence of a partner. The act, when performed with a partner, is called mutual masturbation and is sometimes used as an alternative to sexual intercourse.

For more information click here

[–]organisms 0 points1 point ago

you got spooked. (spoogeet.)

[–]JustSayNoToGov 0 points1 point ago

I laughed for real.

[–]MrSalamandra 0 points1 point ago

Should have seen your face.

[–]mulligrubs 0 points1 point ago

I don't think we have anything to worry about.

Hey Moslem's, you're getting owned on Reddit!
Reddit?
Yeah, it's online.
Online?
The internet.
The what?

[–]Splatterh0use 0 points1 point ago

SPAGHETT!!!

[–]OurMisterBrooks 0 points1 point ago

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Don't worry, the repercussions will hit you all the same. ALLAAAAAAAHHHHH!!

[–]robert_tor 0 points1 point ago

Seriously, a "Religion of Peace" having a potential to react violently?! Of course not! ... Of peace, I mean.

[–]BlinkHouse92 0 points1 point ago

Oh look its spaghett! Please spook my son for me!

[–]paladin_ranger 0 points1 point ago

Spagett!

[–]joeanon 0 points1 point ago

What can they do? DOS the servers? Attack the amazon cloud? All religious have potential to react violently because, they are made up of humans.

[–]Boomer_Roscoe 0 points1 point ago

You'll all be martyrs!

[–]svenniola 0 points1 point ago

so is that jack nicholsons younger crazier brother or what?

[–]SquidManHero 0 points1 point ago

Good news, cigarette juice!

[–]Col_Volkov 0 points1 point ago

All religions have potential to react violently you idiot. People in general have this potential.

[–]nexmillonaire 0 points1 point ago

Would be fun to hear tomorrow that a plane has just flown into the Reddit headquarters outside of San Fransisco and everyone died. Not fun perhaps, but comic in some way.

[–]chetti990 0 points1 point ago

ever heard of radical christians?

[–]longandtall 0 points1 point ago

And you don't think a christian would blow a hole in your head at the drop of the hat? Go ask Madeline Murray O'Hare.

[–]switch50 0 points1 point ago

SPAHGET!!!

[–]pappa67 0 points1 point ago

this is the funnyest thing i have seen on the internet :D http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyh3C1xDT3Y

[–]Lots42 0 points1 point ago

Dude, we're already all targeted for death anyway. Remember that chaos on 9-11?

[–]Purgatory_Dog 0 points1 point ago

react where? it's not like we have an embassy in iran.

[–]TheActualAWdeV 0 points1 point ago

Yes. Soon they'll start strapping bombs on themselves and then logging on to Reddit! Spamming threads about their jihad in /r/atheism AND THEN THEY EXPLODE.

And everybody with half a braincell lived happily ever after.

[–]JohnConnor7 -1 points0 points ago

I laughed the shit out of myself!

[–]mash3735 -1 points0 points ago

is this an airplane joke?

[–]FrisianDude -1 points0 points ago

Title is worded wrong; the religion does not react. Because it's a set of dogmas and dogmas rarely react to anything. :3 Extremists following the religion might. Same as with Christianity. Only in this case amount of probable extremists is higher.

[–]RhomboidStorm -2 points-1 points ago

What. They have been poking fun at christians for years... What? Oh..Muslims...my bad.

[–]Fleshgod -2 points-1 points ago

What are they going to do? Bomb their computer screens?