You know, for science.

Iscream4science · 3 months

the creepy picture makes it perfect

antipeoplemachine · 3 months

Taking the g out of grapefruit...

jh3li · 3 months

LOL 2 minutes ago.

TearTea · 3 months

He's thinking of innovative ways to hide his coin rolls.

tigerbottoms · 3 months

The adjectives "soft and "fleshy" are just too much. I'm calling troll.

red321red321 · 3 months

i'm being entirely serious here but am i the only person who thinks that Pitman looks like he's mentally retarded?

Aggronaut · 3 months

This post left me in dis pear...

sebzim4500 · 3 months

I like how this is under food and drink.... he has no intention of eating or drinking that fruit.

Krotor · 3 months

Save time and use a banana peel!

sprrd · 3 months

Mango works best. Put it in the microwave for 20 seconds to warm it up first.

Sonums · 3 months

Seems legit.

tartureixR · 3 months

The question has been open for 2 minutes. I wonder how did OP find it...

TheWonkyRobot · 3 months

Maybe ask this guy?

RMiranda · 3 months

1 year ago: http://www.reddit.com/r/reddit.com/comments/gcncg/totally_inconspicuous/

krew21 · 3 months

Mmmm yes science.

CherryP0P86 · 3 months

Mmm warm fleshy fruit..

ilikehockey2 · 3 months

so..... whats the answer?

Toof · 3 months

When I worked at a call center, I used to idley carve the insides out of an orange and eat them with my pocket knife. After a good hour on the phones, I would have a completely hollowed out orange with a hole on the bottom about the size of a quarter.

Schedules for call centers rotate around, with no one really being set on a first or second shift. Anyways, I would leave the orange, hole side down on my desk for the whole rest of my shift. At this point a whole different crew of people would be there, and I would finish and go, "Oh, I forgot all about my orange. Hey, Nicole! Do you want it?"

She would look up, and before she could respond, I would wind up and throw it as hard as I could at her. I could throw it like a piece of paper, honestly, so the damn thing would just lightly tap and bounce off of her. It was just to see her throw up her arms incredibly defensively for no reason.

Working in call centers are fun, but boring.

zstone · 3 months

Maybe one of his friends is throwing an Emotion Party...

A lady is throwing a party where each guest shows up as their favorite emotion. A guest arrives dressed in green. "Envy!" she says, and lets him in.

A lady comes dressed in red. She says, "Anger!" and lets her in.

Two naked guys walk up to the front door. One guy is holding a bowl of pudding with his penis stuck in it, and the other guy has his penis in a hollowed-out pear.

"Wait a minute," she says to them. "This is supposed to be an emotion party!"

The first guy says, "Yeah, and I'm f**king dis-custard."

The second guy says, "And I'm deep in dis-pear."

MisterBrownEyes · 3 months

Ok, but in all seriousness, pineapple corer.

333kyary · 3 months

The fact YOU asked this question in the sole purpose of posting it to /r/funny makes it totally not funny.

darknemesis25 · 3 months

I think you could use a drill bit for cutting circles

Or maybe sharpen the edges of a pvc pipe and hammer it through

Or just use a knife and cut in circles

adicembre · 3 months

I see what you're doing there...

nemesishaven · 3 months

He's asking for a friend I'm sure: http://pennyarcade.wikia.com/wiki/Fruit_Fucker_2000

plsenjy · 3 months

Softly under my breath I whispered, "Pitman....'

shw91 · 3 months

Your title made me laugh

WorldGenesis · 3 months

I liked my reaction when I said the this title:

You know... chuckles a bit while saying it For science

Imfuckinpicasso · 3 months

So this is what Andy Dufresne has been up to since Shawshank

Supercarnage · 3 months

He's probably thinking of his sister the sick fuck to!

pingspike · 3 months

freeze said fruit, cut whilst melting.

Not.. that i ever tried such a thing... or even needed too ...

BruschiOnTap · 3 months

Does anyone else notice the guys username? "Pit"man? LoL!

UNEification · 3 months

Semi-relevant 5sf

leet_hacksaw · 3 months

Serious responses only, I really want my internal fruitbusion engine idea to take off.

whittler · 3 months

One thing you wont see on the survival shows. How to make desert pussy. A large prickly pear ear can have a slit cut into the edge after all the thorns are burned off. The hot heat of the desert makes the squishy inside all nice and warm.

BringTheYoutube · 3 months

I figured it out, guys! The dude wants to have sex with a fruit. That sounds pretty gay.

make_em_laugh · 3 months

taking the tube to crazytown!

dbasinge · 3 months

Wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more.

gigashadowwolf · 3 months

Take a large banana, cut off the tips of both ends with a knife. The hole on the stem side should be as wide as your penis. The other side should be about half an inch. Squeeze out banana inside. Put peel in microwave for 5-10 seconds.

Nature's single use fleshlight.

If you are well endowed or cannot find large bananas plantains work as well, but you have to actually cook them in the microwave until the are soft. Them wait for them to cool to body temperature.

punisher1005 · 3 months

Hole saw.

frankzilla8395 · 3 months

o_0 dafuq

Coyne · 3 months

You monster

littledrypotato · 3 months

1.5 inches? WTF, that's like the width of pencils put together.

kelvinmai · 3 months

So? Where's the answer?

sexbobomb91 · 3 months

So does anyone have an answer?

This melon will not fuck itself, you know...

SevTheNiceGuy · 3 months

sweet raptor jesus

dinkleberg92 · 3 months

I'm sorry but the photo does nothing to help here.

SkateboardG · 3 months

Try sticking your dick in it.

opiv · 3 months

The best part is the users photo

micahtheflipster · 3 months

Relevant:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTMUbP1VEQA

Boffo1 · 3 months

I like that his name is Pitman. He's encountered one too many pits in his endeavours.

WizardsMyName · 3 months

Correct response: "Stick your dick in it".

Troll_Stomper · 3 months

Just use a broom handle to puncture an eggplant. Put that shit in the microwave for a bit, and fuck it to your hearts content. You're Welcome

MarvinTheAndroid42 · 3 months

Discretion, he has none.

Liquor_Man · 3 months

I'm really not sure why, but I downvote you a lot. Do you only repost and submit really stupid pictures?

Mycooljam · 3 months

One time when I was over a friend's house, we were jokingly talking about sex with fruit and we wondered what it was called, so we googled it and one of the results was a y!answers page and the person was saying how they couldn't find fruit with a hole, my friend and I burst out laughing and we still refference to it to this day.

Afrew · 3 months

Soooo... what's the best way to do it?

StrangerDanger13 · 3 months

FOREVER ALONE.:(

Petrosian · 3 months

remove the pit, man

HBZ415 · 3 months

You definitely didnt make that...

trublwithnorml · 3 months

You've heard of self tapping screws, what he needs is a self tapping condom. (no puns intended by the use of the word tapping here).

RoundersBat · 3 months

Potato isn't a fruit.

funny

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