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top 200 commentsshow all 429

[–]IgorEmu 618 points619 points ago

Most original joke ever.

[–]Psychic_Meatball 700 points701 points ago

Average Redditor: I'll take overused unfunny Reddit jokes for 200 Alex
Alex: Answer: This website is totally unoriginal and steals all of Reddit's content......Jim
Average Redditor: What is 9Gag?
Alex: Correct.
Average Redditor: Overused unfunny Reddit jokes for 400
Alex: Answer: Mention you're from this continent and you're sure to have your world flipped on its head......Jim
Average Redditor: What is Australia?
Alex: Right again.
Average Redditor: Reddit jokes for 600 please
Alex: Classic example of this joke, "Your sister sure does have a great moustache"..... Jim again
Average Redditor: What is The ol' Reddit Switcheroo?
Alex: Right again
Average Redditor: Nice! Let's keep it going Alex. Reddit jokes for 8
Alex: Answer: Nothing has ever not happened as much as BLANK has not happened......Jim
Average Redditor: What is 'This'?
Alex: You got it.
Average Redditor: Let's finish it up Alex. Overused Unfunny Reddit jokes for 1000
Alex: Answer: The daily double
Average Redditor: I'll bet it all Alex.
Alex: Ok. Here it is. This actress, famous for her roles in Sex in the City and Failure to Launch posesses horse-like facial features......Jim
Average Redditor: Oh wow......Um.....Who is Sarah Jessica Parker?
Alex: Abslutely. Well done Jim. You go into the final Jeopardy with $14,000. Today's Final Jeaopardy topic: Overly used unfunny Reddit puns. Think about that and we'll be right back after this!

(Generic commercials selling you some shit)

Alex: And we're back. Contestants, here is your answer: This Dutch woman certainly did 'Nazi' that coming. Begin.

(Cue the music)

Alex: Becky, you first. Let's see what you wagered; $4,000. Your guess; What is 'Am I Reich'? No I'm sorry, that brings you down to $1000. Ok, Tom. You wagered; $2,000. Your guess; What is 'Jew guys are so funny'. I'm sorry, that's not what we're looking for. That brings you down to a big fat fucking zero. Jim, you wagered; $14,000, cuz you got balls kid. You're answer: Who is 'Anne Frankly'. You are correct, making you today's winner with a grand total of $28,000. Join us next time on Reddit Jeopardy, when Jim takes on topics like "Things that shouldn't be memes" and "The secret lives of Reddit Celebrities." Goodnight.

[–]muttur 203 points204 points ago

Am I the only one who heard the Jeopardy lasers go off when Alex told Average Redditor he hit the Daily Double?

[–]jsake 26 points27 points ago

you and I both friend.

[–]dillpiccolol 7 points8 points ago

How can both of you be the only one? Are you the anti-highlander?

[–]mriparian 10 points11 points ago

There can be only two ones.

[–]tatorface 19 points20 points ago

LASERS

[–]Gotterdamerrung 7 points8 points ago

Yes, All Mighty Tallest.

[–]jabb0 16 points17 points ago

Has anyone seen Jepordy from 25 years ago when he had the stache?

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]jabb0 3 points4 points ago

Yep.

[–]gornzilla 6 points7 points ago

He doesn't have a moustache anymore? Sometimes I impress myself at how well I've cut myself off from pop culture.

[–]Fenrisulfir 1 point2 points ago

Jeopardy is pop culture??

[–]teenMom86 1 point2 points ago

It was an awesome stache. Almost as nice as your sister's...

[–]AyoTech 9 points10 points ago

pew pew ppew pew

[–]brody10123 0 points1 point ago

[–]RickHalkyon 16 points17 points ago

TIL The average redditor's name is Jim.

[–]TheNoodlyMessiah 11 points12 points ago

Your name isn't jim?

[–]LadronPlykis 13 points14 points ago

That really rustles my jimmies.

[–]TheNoodlyMessiah 2 points3 points ago

ohohohoho

[–]Revoran 2 points3 points ago

http://www.reddit.com/user/Jim

It would seem he isn't terribly active.

[–]TheNoodlyMessiah 1 point2 points ago

but he's jim.

[–]RickHalkyon 0 points1 point ago

No, but I think I am a below-average redditor.

[–]jofutofu 0 points1 point ago

I thought everyone was raj

[–]paddymac1991 12 points13 points ago

That was brilliant

[–]Menir 5 points6 points ago

Upvote for the effort to type this all out.

[–]zosoyoung 6 points7 points ago

I like how you had to switch "this" with "BLANK" because "this" was the correct answer.

[–]Marth_Aurion 2 points3 points ago

While this is quite hilarious, my name is alex and I got very confused very fast....

[–]James718 4 points5 points ago

Will ferrel's Trebec voice was in my head the whole time while reading this

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

I created a subreddit for you (and others today).

O

O

O

O

[–]Ace1999 1 point2 points ago

Man and I thought you had 6712 points.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Nah, that's the date. I usually ditch my accounts after a month or so.

[–]readidThat 1 point2 points ago

Wager comes after the answer Jim. Just Saying

[–]Keiokochan 1 point2 points ago

This is the best thing I've read in the past week.

[–]mfo245 1 point2 points ago

You forgot, "People steal pictures off the internet and claim this person did it"

Redditor: "My friend"

[–]phil8248 1 point2 points ago

I'm calling bull shit because Final Jeopardy comes after Double Jeopardy, which was never played. The values double and scores can really change.

[–]Audentio 0 points1 point ago

This brought me great amusement.

[–]MelsEpicWheelTime 0 points1 point ago

You're answer

Your answer

You've triggered a sudden death match! Proof read these 200 9gag comments. Last one to miss a spelling or grammatical error wins!

[–]benchanlol 0 points1 point ago

Better generic commercials than how they used to be...

[–]karltee 0 points1 point ago

Tom. You wagered; $2,000. Your guess; What is 'Jew guys are so funny'. I'm sorry, that's not what we're looking for. That brings you down to a big fat fucking zero.

Thought of this right away

[–]tonyh322 132 points133 points ago

15 minutes later...

"Oh, I get it!"

[–]beauty_contest -1 points0 points ago

15 more minutes later:

"Oh, NOW I get it!"

[–]waker7281 7 points8 points ago

Don't set up a link that has people download something! Downvote!

[–]JMac96 1 point2 points ago

agreed

[–]Nick700 2 points3 points ago

... why did I just download that

[–]Le_Karma_Whore 28 points29 points ago

I would say he was beating a dead horse but then that would lead to another SJP joke.

Joke was already made. sigh

[–]nigeltheginger 6 points7 points ago

Look down

[–]Le_Karma_Whore 4 points5 points ago

Ah shit

[–]Xphex 22 points23 points ago

don't worry, i sigh when i look down too

[–]Le_Karma_Whore 1 point2 points ago

I love you.

[–]aroymart 1 point2 points ago

Tagged as "SMASHING"

[–]bmanickel 1 point2 points ago

BLARGHABALGARGH

[–]kavorka2 34 points35 points ago

And funniest.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]DELTATKG 18 points19 points ago

[–]trippynumbers 1 point2 points ago

And it still gets upvote...

[–]HouseBreaker 3 points4 points ago

....d

[–]_uparrow 1 point2 points ago

[–]auntiepauline 0 points1 point ago

i thought it was hilarious

[–]B_S_O_D 22 points23 points ago

Those are some fine boobs though!

[–]Gavinardo 2 points3 points ago

I'd still motorboat it.

[–]lotionsandcreams 137 points138 points ago

This is still funny to people?

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points ago

School ended so the internet is full of tweens now.

[–]nonsensical_zombie 36 points37 points ago

Worst excuse. This joke is always upvoted for like the past 3 years.

[–]mereel 9 points10 points ago

You think reddit hasn't been overrun with tweens for the past 3 years?

[–]patternfall 4 points5 points ago

Is this really a word you people use in normal conversation? Is it so the teenagers on here can separate themselves from the not-quite teenagers?

[–]Kelsomatic 1 point2 points ago

When are people going to realize that sometimes things get upvoted repeatedly because different sets of people are seeing them. It's not like the same people are on reddit all the time and when something gets reposted and upvoted 75% of them were just drunk.

[–]BlackCommandoXI 4 points5 points ago

Wait. You guys aren't always on Reddit? Well then.

[–]Pxtl 1 point2 points ago

Do tweens even remember the days when this joke was funny?

[–]lotionsandcreams 1 point2 points ago

Yeah, I figured as much.

[–]IronPigeon 1 point2 points ago

Did you hear the one about Chuck Norris

[–]NOACeulemans 57 points58 points ago

YOU LIE! It's a JPEG!

[–]matebeatscoffee 14 points15 points ago

I admire your dedication.

[–]Sir_Asshole 1 point2 points ago

All you do is change the end of he url from .jpg to .gif.

[–]Misharum_Kittum 2 points3 points ago

thatsthejoke.jpg

[–]Charwinger21 2 points3 points ago

NOW, NEW AND IMPROVED; thatsthejoke.jpg.exe.tur.bat.apng.avi.pdf.htm.xml.jar.7z.rar.zip.pl.php5.apk.tga.scr.flac.rm.msi.wwf

[–]Sir_Asshole 0 points1 point ago

toolazytofindthepicture.jpg

[–]runnerboy23 0 points1 point ago

Hey man, thats like typing 3 keys. Strenuous work there.

[–]tonkers 2 points3 points ago

I hate you......

[–]Pravkin 1 point2 points ago

You were my brother tonkers! I loved you!

[–]Aetas 6 points7 points ago

I too, was disappointed in the format of the picture.

[–]Nithoren 2 points3 points ago

This isn't a gif! You're a phoney!

[–]omarhajar84 5 points6 points ago

HEY GUYS! THIS GUY IS A PHONY! A BIG FAT PHONY!

[–]dembones01 173 points174 points ago

I think we are beating a dead Sarah Jessica Parker with this joke.

[–]steven_wlkr 57 points58 points ago

Agreed. OP can go screw himself, and the Sarah Jessica Parker he rode in on.

[–]DELTATKG 42 points43 points ago

*rode

[–]swiftb3 20 points21 points ago

This whole thread is utter Sarah Jessica Parker shit.

[–]nigeltheginger 35 points36 points ago

Oh get off your high Sarah Jessica Parker and just enjoy the joke

[–][deleted] 36 points37 points ago

Come on guys, stop Sarah Jessica Parkering around.

[–]AscentofDissent 17 points18 points ago

Hold your Sarah Jessica Parkers everyone, this has gone too far.

[–]colonel_mortimer 40 points41 points ago

The loop is pretty seamless too, nice work.

[–]misterwizzard 31 points32 points ago

[–]Apostolate 25 points26 points ago

I don't get it. I've been staring for 5 minutes at this horse and it's not morphing into sarah jessica parker.

[–]flamingbiskuet 2 points3 points ago

How many ppl waited for her to morph

[–]qu4ttro 1 point2 points ago

yup

[–]redgroupclan 0 points1 point ago

Nope. Knew what was coming right away.

[–]GrizzlySquid 10 points11 points ago

"Hey guys, Sarah Jessica Parker looks like a horse. Enclosed is a picture of Sarah Jessica Parker as proof that I deserve karma."

The fuck.

[–]arisakicksass 5 points6 points ago

Am I the only person who honestly thinks she is kind of pretty? She's better looking then more then half of you probably.

[–]SkankinPacman 1 point2 points ago

Than* :D

[–]boomboxdino 6 points7 points ago

I just watched this an infinite amount of times.

[–]fiercepenguin 20 points21 points ago

[–]Alanoyes 16 points17 points ago

This is Reddit, where girls aren't hot unless they're 10/10 and then if they are they are attention whores. But no, I also think Sarah Jessica Parker is attractive.

[–]Gitarham 2 points3 points ago

9/10 would not bang.

[–]BigGay-AL 10 points11 points ago

yes.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

nope

[–]patternfall 1 point2 points ago

If a man had that jawline, he'd be complimented for his "rugged, strong jawline."

[–]slybob 0 points1 point ago

Me too, mainly 'cos of LA Story. Shit, now I'm actually 40..

[–]gentleman_brown 1 point2 points ago

Honeymoon in Vegas. Rockin' bod.

[–]augustus_gloob 6 points7 points ago

almost stopped looking at it. was worth the 5 minute wait. good work OP!

[–]MangoTux 1 point2 points ago

It might just have needed to load, but mine took about twice as long.

[–]mongoOnlyPawn 22 points23 points ago

I've been watching....still no Sarah Jessica Parker, just the dang horse.

[–]tucci77 14 points15 points ago

You say this as if all of you wouldn't sleep with her at the snap of her fingers.

[–]RedShirtedAss 5 points6 points ago

HAHA ITS FUNNY BECAUSE SJP LOOKS LIKE A HORSE!

Reddit, why won't girls sleep with me? I'm such a nice guy!

[–]CannedMango 6 points7 points ago

I now read these sorts of posts as:

"I dislike myself and my shitty life... better go find an easy target".

[–]AllDizzle 8 points9 points ago

Oh we're back to these jokes again?

[–]cryonova 7 points8 points ago

TIL I'm down with bestiality

[–]AFewSecondsAgoDouche 1 point2 points ago

for(;;)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

How original and funny you are. And you didn't even bother to save it as a gif you lazy fucktard.

[–]pibroch 1 point2 points ago

[–]Lhabs 1 point2 points ago

She has some nice tits...for a horse

[–]everafter09 1 point2 points ago

hahaha omg that was perfect!!! i thought my computer was just being slow :P

[–]tyrannustyrannus 1 point2 points ago

waiting for the .gif to l...oh I get it

[–]supjeff 1 point2 points ago

I'm glad I didn't have to sign up on imgur to downvote this.

[–]TheFluxIsThis 1 point2 points ago

I thought we were over this joke.

[–]AlbinoLifeguard 1 point2 points ago

Anyone else stare at the pic for a good minute waiting for something?

[–]Charwinger21 1 point2 points ago

.jpg

At least save it as a .gif...

[–]ZapRowsdower14 6 points7 points ago

Am I the only person who thinks these jokes are unnecessarily cruel? It's not like she's a bad person or anything.

[–]RufiosBrotherKev 2 points3 points ago

But she's terrible at being a horse. Wearing clothes and all, thinks its people!

[–]JealousAmoeba 2 points3 points ago

She's not even that bad looking in OP's pic...

[–]DanielKlavitz 1 point2 points ago

The Knights of New have really been slacking off...

[–]goobersmooch 3 points4 points ago

Ya know, I don't know why she gets so much grief.. I think she's hot.

[–]cdahlkvist 11 points12 points ago

I think Sarah Jessica Parker is beautiful.

This joke is stupid.

[–]gingergonewild 2 points3 points ago

I agree, she is gorgeous and most of the guys making these stupid-ass jokes would be lucky to date someone half as attractive as she is. She really doesn't look that much like a horse, her bone structure is very strong & defined but I like it. And even if you don't find her attractive, this joke is SOOOOOOOOOOOO fucking tired and old.

[–]SeeTheSeraphim 2 points3 points ago

Rererererererereeeeeeee-Post

[–]FabulousLastWords 7 points8 points ago

Could you link this from somewhere else, my browser froze it on the picture of the horse.

[–]meows_it_goin 5 points6 points ago

[–]stacksdad 1 point2 points ago

I see what you did there.

[–]thegoogs 2 points3 points ago

Congratulations. This is literally one of the worst jokes I have ever seen on the internet.

[–]rhubarbbus 2 points3 points ago

OH I GET IT, IT'S BECAUSE SHE HAS A BIG NOSE.

FUCK DUDE, MY FUNNY GLAND IS EXPLODING.

[–]Dalek-Caan 9 points10 points ago

SHIT MAN. DID YOUR COUSIN TAKE YOUR CAPS LOCK KEY TOO FOR TELLING EVERYONE IT WAS MORE THAN JUST WRESTLING?

[–]rhubarbbus 3 points4 points ago

HE JUST WOULDN'T STOP.

"IT JUST IS A GAME" HE KEPT SAYING.

[–]IknowBUDS 2 points3 points ago

this joke is stupid and i'm telling you that

[–]WardX732 1 point2 points ago

I would ride it.

[–]SkylineDriver 1 point2 points ago

Anyone else waiting for Bruce Willis to rise out of her top?

[–]Frozen_Ghul 1 point2 points ago

... i thought i came up with an original comment but you were faster, have an upvote

[–]dafones 1 point2 points ago

Oh, I get it.

[–]Cis4Psycho 1 point2 points ago

Ok, i see the horse but where is Sarah?

[–]DomoInMySoup 1 point2 points ago

You made your gif too long. I got tired of waiting.

0/10 would not watch again.

[–]dabezian 2 points3 points ago

You could at least make it a .gif, you know?

So it doesn't say .jpg at the end? Because .gif files don't say .jpg at the end.

[–]m0ng0o53 3 points4 points ago

Dude that really made my day. I stared for literally 10 minutes before I got it. Bravo

[–]RufiosBrotherKev 4 points5 points ago

LITERALLY 1/6 of an hour

[–]Expresso2113 1 point2 points ago

literally

[–]MeltedBanana 1 point2 points ago

So brave.

[–]soad334 3 points4 points ago

This post is so original I logged in just to downvote it!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

Oh, har, har. "Sarah Jessica Parker is a hoarse, am I rite, guyse?" Fuck off.

[–]dingus_tron 0 points1 point ago

RDRR

[–]fora-mejora 0 points1 point ago

[–]VintageSin 0 points1 point ago

Would've been funnier if it was actually a gif. ಠ_ಠ

[–]Hcanimals 0 points1 point ago

I was really looking forward to that gif... Only disappointment.

[–]Me4Prez 0 points1 point ago

You could at least made it into a .gif

You get minus one gazillion billion karma for using lamest joke ever and not even executing it right.

[–]brandon628 0 points1 point ago

[–]MrFluffykins 0 points1 point ago

Do you know how mad I was when I found out she's the hot witch in Hocus Pocus?

[–]Lon3Wolf64 0 points1 point ago

UMMM HEY GREEN_APPLE I THINK UPLOAD WRONG I SEE JPG

[–]gem-patricia_PATD 0 points1 point ago

I didn't even get the 'joke' at first. I thought it was just taking ages to load.

[–]wieners 0 points1 point ago

But it's a .jpg file...

YOU COULDN'T EVEN MAKE IT A .GIF FILE?!?! THIS WHOLE GODDAMN THING IS A SHAM!

[–]SavageColdness 0 points1 point ago

So easy. So classy.

[–]SuperDuderr 0 points1 point ago

id hit it.

[–]bl33t 0 points1 point ago

it's a .jpg lol

[–]YouKnowNothingReddit 0 points1 point ago

It never moved. But I saw the morphing.

[–]dyscnfsd 0 points1 point ago

Stared at this and started seeing her head pulsate...I think there's something wrong with me

[–]Chronocook 0 points1 point ago

That is a jpeg.. i award you no points and may god have mercy on your soul.

[–]septimus379 0 points1 point ago

That's the idea r-tard

[–]ArbitraryPerseveranc 0 points1 point ago

I just looked at her boobs then closed it and read the title, clicked it again, saw it was a .jpg, so I looked at her boobs again and closed it.

[–]FatHitman 0 points1 point ago

Would Bang

[–]Deacon 0 points1 point ago

Would Mount

[–]The_One_Above_All 0 points1 point ago

Damn. I watched for almost 10 minutes, thinking the gif was taking forever to load.

[–]Deacon 1 point2 points ago

LPT: "gifs" are not the same as "jpgs."

[–]minorwhite 0 points1 point ago

i actually waited entirely too long for the gif. I am embarrass.

[–]costado 0 points1 point ago

boring

[–]Isaacguy 0 points1 point ago

this gif doesn't seem that stable.

[–]ichigo2862 0 points1 point ago

I don't want to get saddled with a pun thread.

[–]M7600 0 points1 point ago

this......

IS A JPEG!!!!!

Not a gif.

There was no morphing at all. ಠ_ಠ

[–]septimus379 1 point2 points ago

That's the point r-tard...

[–]M7600 0 points1 point ago

But he said gif in the title. Yet the picture was a .jpeg. Yet some how, some way, this man has clearly represented both, Sarah Jessica Parker and a free-roaming Mustang Horse.

[–]septimus379 0 points1 point ago

Why does this not have more upvotes?

[–]DSTFU 0 points1 point ago

Why the long face?

[–]MegaSwagZeta 0 points1 point ago

what a knee slapper

[–]GorthaurTheCruel 0 points1 point ago

Ive been staring at it forever. My computer loads gifs so slow

[–]TheyCallMeDucky 0 points1 point ago

Imagine waking up next to that..

[–]bigwoof 0 points1 point ago

Morph? She already is a horse face

[–]mumbly__joe 0 points1 point ago

Don't look a gif horse in the mouth.

[–]the_isra 0 points1 point ago

When does it end? I feel like like this gif goes on forever...