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1591
1592

Here's another good way to start a book. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by kevonicus

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[–]Tashre 57 points58 points ago

(Please ignore this part)

FUCK!

[–]burntham77 7 points8 points ago

Yep, I failed too.

[–]Apostolate 2 points3 points ago

I didn't until you guys fucked it up for me. Thanks for nothing.

[–]Draegur 0 points1 point ago

more like FUCK THEM because we do what we WANT! THUG LYFE!!

[–]LastRedCoat 127 points128 points ago

Comedian Demetri Martin's book "This Is A Book" for those wondering.

[–]Zachness34 7 points8 points ago

I have been reading it myself lately and my favourite part is definitely the Announcements chapter

[–]wullymammith 3 points4 points ago

Or when he talks about his vegan adventures

[–]Zachness34 0 points1 point ago

True, true

[–]Blackzach9 29 points30 points ago

Actually, the title is "This is a Book by Demetri Martin".

[–]tndooge 14 points15 points ago

This is a Book by Demetri Martin titled This is a Book by Demetri Martin... By Demetri Martin.

[–]Blackzach9 8 points9 points ago

Yo dawg...

[–]xbacon_ninja 2 points3 points ago

i love that book

[–]SUCOL 1 point2 points ago

I couldn't read this book, it was awful. Maybe its just not my style, its kind of a sketch comedy type deal. I laughed out loud at some chapters, but others were almost depressingly painful to read.

[–]generouscumshaw 0 points1 point ago

Commenting so I will remember to buy this book after I dump the body.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Jpot 16 points17 points ago

Unsure if you are a troll, or a 14 year old white kid in a disappointingly misguided attempt to be funny.

[–]Your_Mom_My_DingDong 8 points9 points ago

He's less then a day old. It shouldn't be as it do, but it is.

[–]bigcatohmy 2 points3 points ago

obvious troll... examined comment history...

[–]V838_Mon 2 points3 points ago

Probably the same asshole with the "arrowstotheknee" account. Just as pathetic and unfunny, anyway.

[–]Broanna 0 points1 point ago

I think this is for you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlKL_EpnSp8

[–]Secres 0 points1 point ago

I feel bad for you knowing that you lack being funny.

[–]mikeno1 -1 points0 points ago

I think you'll enjoy /r/ghettojerk

[–]Teekoo -5 points-4 points ago

I remember the time when Demitri Martin actually used to be funny. Now he's just some pseudo intellectual unfunny smartass.

[–]hi_kthxbai 21 points22 points ago

Down voted for stain in lower right.

[–]azorin 8 points9 points ago

3/10

Stain on the first page. Would not read.

[–]chattereddit -5 points-4 points ago

fap fap fap fap. shit!

[–]Wiremaster 4 points5 points ago

This concludes an abbreviated list of things that will stain a book.

[–]brittnoose 2 points3 points ago

If you've got shit coming out of that hole, you should probably consult your doctor.

[–]spunkymarimba -2 points-1 points ago

Dat stain.

[–]Trapped_in_Reddit 29 points30 points ago

(Please ignore these comments)

[–]Breathing_Balls 20 points21 points ago

As always, TIR, as always.

[–]IMasturbateToMyself 7 points8 points ago

How? I don't get how he does it.

[–]absparekh 6 points7 points ago

Similarly, I don't get how you do it

[–]Holy90 2 points3 points ago

With a mirror, one assumes.

[–]Breathing_Balls 5 points6 points ago

Have you ever stood over a mirror naked, legs apart?

It ain't a pretty sight, let me tell you.

[–]thenougat 2 points3 points ago

Speak for yourself

[–]Apostolate 1 point2 points ago

Of all the angles you could choose?

[–]videogameexpert 3 points4 points ago

relevant username.

[–]5HAK 7 points8 points ago

I still can't believe you've only been around for 2 months and already have 460,000 comment karma...

[–]Xaragnak 4 points5 points ago

He's dying ou a bit now. People seems to get bored of him.

[–]Breathing_Balls 3 points4 points ago

The mind fuck is that he is only 13 years old, and has aspergers.

Clever bastard.

[–]moshthecows 1 point2 points ago

Can you like me to proof or a source? I WANT TO BELIEVE..

[–]Breathing_Balls 4 points5 points ago

Here you go. A pic of the infamous Trapped_in_reddit.

[–]compto35 2 points3 points ago

I mean, he is trapped here

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]5HAK 1 point2 points ago

Really? You got a source for that?

[–]flaystus 0 points1 point ago

Meanwhile my lack of content keeps me from breaking the 2000 link karma barrier.

[–]KryptosV2 2 points3 points ago

I have a feeling I have you as a friend on Steam because he is also always "Online" when I check and responds within the first minute.

[–]DangerousCommercials 2 points3 points ago

"this is a book" by demetri martin. It's hilarious if you like him. it's one of those "pick up and read a random section" and then laugh yourself silly. I think the book actually recreates his cognitive thinking really well, it's sort of all over the place. It's almost like a book form of "if i" with completely new jokes.

[–]moomooguy2 2 points3 points ago

DEMETRI MARTIN

[–]wasteymclife 1 point2 points ago

Good book if you haven't read it.

[–]FatCat433 6 points7 points ago

I can't even figure out how to read it.

[–]Lying_Cake 1 point2 points ago

I have this book in my closet and I've read it 5 times.

[–]spunkymarimba 1 point2 points ago

You lying cake

[–]AgentPeach 1 point2 points ago

Demetri Martin is brilliant.

[–]palordrolap 1 point2 points ago

That stain. Either someone's been eating curry and left a dirty thumbprint, or someone reads in the bathroom and I don't want to finish that sentence.

[–]underground4550 0 points1 point ago

is there a book that teaches you how to read for those who actually don't know how to read?

[–]growlingbear 2 points3 points ago

Ours was "Dick and Jane", when I was a kid.

[–]dudejust 0 points1 point ago

genius

[–]DangerousCommercials 0 points1 point ago

here's another quality excerpt, different fortune cookie possibilities:

"surprise! you just ate dog"

"if you were tiny, this could be a banner"

"does advertising in fortune cookies work? It just did. Call (Phone#) for more information."

[–]PwnCakes193 0 points1 point ago

Upvote for This Is A Book

[–]margaryna 0 points1 point ago

"here's another good way to start a book", so instead of posting it in the thread about it,I'll take a picture so I can get more karma for it.

[–]TheLivingAwesome 0 points1 point ago

fuck... i read the "just ignore this part" part... now i need to start over and ignore it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

There's no way to ignore that...

[–]surrealasm_atwork 0 points1 point ago

I was wondering if it was Richard Brautigan... Not surprised it's Demetri

[–]rampion 0 points1 point ago

I always thought books started with synergy. Or possibly an onion

[–]clemensschein 0 points1 point ago

I don't want to sound like a dick here, but isn't that sentence missing a comma? Shouldn't it be, "If something, then something."?

[–]iguesso 0 points1 point ago

I love this book to the extent that it's absurd.

[–]ShyHero 0 points1 point ago

The night was sultry?

[–]JonnyCams 0 points1 point ago

This summer at a pool party I learned a very valuable difference between peeing in the pool and peeing into the pool...

Location, location, location.

[–]theavacado 0 points1 point ago

this book is hysterical. i caught some odd looks on the beach last weekend reading it and giggling out loud. highly recommend! will not disappoint.

[–]conley46 0 points1 point ago

i'll try that sometime :))

[–]BallsackTBaghard 0 points1 point ago

I didn't ignore it. what the fuck now??!

[–]mackzills 0 points1 point ago

This book is awesome. Bought it in the Boston airport and damn near finished it that day. I've been a fan of his for a while and he keeps getting funnier.

[–]Typlo 0 points1 point ago

(Please ignore the stain)

[–]palerthanrice 0 points1 point ago

This is one of my favorite books. It's brilliant.

[–]speaktodragons 0 points1 point ago

Medieval helpdesk with the new device called a book.

[–]Pizzabagles 0 points1 point ago

Shit. I didn't read it correctly. What now?

[–]LionCircuit 0 points1 point ago

One of my favorites

[–]azufaifa 0 points1 point ago

I'm reading this great book called Rayuela (Hopschotch in English) that DOES come with reading instructions, it is not only two books in one, but it has also several "games" or tricks (for example, there's one chapter where you have to read every third line, first lines 1, 3, 5, etc, then lines 2, 4, 6...). From Wikipedia:

An author's note suggests that the book would best be read in one of two possible ways, either progressively from chapters 1 to 56 or by "hopscotching" through the entire set of 155 chapters according to a "Table of Instructions" designated by the author. Cortazar also leaves the reader the option of choosing his/her own unique path through the narrative.

Several narrative techniques are employed throughout the book, and frequently overlap, including first person, third person, and a kind of stream-of-consciousness. Traditional spelling and grammatical rules are often bent and sometimes broken outright. A few chapters purport to be written by other authors, and there is even a whole section taken almost verbatim from another novel that may or may not exist in actuality.

[–]thewerd101 0 points1 point ago

Looks like someone left half a pizza pocket on that page

[–]capitano32 -2 points-1 points ago

http://imgur.com/iB6Kj

[–]jopr -1 points0 points ago

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