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all 40 comments

[–]trekkie_becky 19 points20 points ago

This kills the white man. No really, it might put too much pressure on his chest causing his lungs to not have room to expand.

[–]AllThatJazz 7 points8 points ago

Yes, indeed: this is more than sufficient weight to kill someone.

So this would actually be a dangerous prank.

The muscles involved in breathing can't cope with that kind of weight for very long.


Essentially in a situation like this you are forcing the breathing muscles to lift weights and bench press!

But of course those muscles are only supposed to breath... not lift weights. There is insufficient muscle mass and energy stored in breathing muscles to keep breathing for very long under such conditions.


It's like jogging: if you start at a really slow pace, it feels easy and you think you could keep it up indefinitely. But even at a slow pace, eventually your leg muscles run out of energy store and they are no longer able to carry you at a joggers pace beyond that point.


Sadly, this method was one of many utilized to kill prisoners during medieval times. Stones would simply be placed on the victim/prisoner's chest and stomach area... and fairly quickly the victim's muscles would become too deprived of energy to breath against the weight of the stones, and the victim would suffocate and die. (They didn't even have to use very heavy weights to kill people in this way...)

[–]an_asshole_atheist 1 point2 points ago

Could you give a specific weight or range of weights? This is very interesting.

Also, do you know of any of the risks involving suffocation during sleep whilst on opioids? (sorry that's completely random)

[–]Battletooth 2 points3 points ago

I'm keeping an eye on you...

[–]sirblastalot 1 point2 points ago

Note that you can't actually see any melons stacked above his waist. If this is a staged photo (likely) they probably only stacked them on his legs and possibly upper groin.

[–]flappypisser 8 points9 points ago

but thats a white boy in the bed, isnt it?

[–]TumbleDryLow 2 points3 points ago

No, no, this doesn't add up at all!

[–]zanmanoodle 5 points6 points ago

If only you had a katana...

[–]Shiverfox 2 points3 points ago

RIP Giles Corey

[–]TheManatee 1 point2 points ago

Watermelon Bust?

[–]Panther-State 1 point2 points ago

I wish I could hear the back story for this...

[–]gettheboom 1 point2 points ago

Watermelons are actually berries. Berry blanket.

[–]FishBonePendant 0 points1 point ago

Berries are fruit. And I have a katana right here...

[–]aqiul 1 point2 points ago

That's one lazy fruit ninja.

[–]cg4l 1 point2 points ago

Wait a minute...this isn't Cyrodiil...

[–]Wazowski 1 point2 points ago

Skyrim LARPers

[–]Smorsh 1 point2 points ago

Pictured: Every game of Garry's Mod.

[–]Satans_pro_tips 0 points1 point ago

Crime Scene 101, I can still see the body.

[–]skysophrenic 0 points1 point ago

[–]Arxilca 1 point2 points ago

Relevant picture. (Credit to Grieflol from /r/Oblivion)

[–]ZippyKitty 0 points1 point ago

When Fruit Ninja goes wrong

[–]FreshFruitCup 0 points1 point ago

This guy is the president of my condo association.

[–]MixMasterYoda 0 points1 point ago

Ones does not simply, push a pallet jack into ones bedroom. :/

[–]Singletoned 0 points1 point ago

So, we're calling watermelons "Fuck blankets" from now on are we?

Fair enough. It reminds me of the old Arabian saying:

A woman for reproduction. A boy for pleasure. A melon for ecstasy.

[–]OIP 1 point2 points ago

  1. i can't believe i googled that saying

  2. i can't believe the results showed it's a real saying

[–]Singletoned 0 points1 point ago

Hmm, you just made me Google it, and I'm afraid it's Turkish not Arabic, and it's also fictional. It's from a book called "A Melon for Ecstasy" in which the hero is a British man "who can only achieve sexual satisfaction by raping trees". (That's not usual over here, by the way. Normally we have several different methods).

I'm quite disappointed to have found that out, but I don't think I'll tell anyone.

[–]Ungemach 0 points1 point ago

he's just hiding what he does to his favorite melon.

[–]Luke_Hero 0 points1 point ago

[–]RobotLido 0 points1 point ago

Wait, is this not a normal thing to do? That fruit salesman lied to me!

[–]epicGOPfail 0 points1 point ago

[–]Bishopkilljoy 0 points1 point ago

I FUCKING LOVE MELON

[–]Z_E_L_D_A 0 points1 point ago

I thought i was looking at an old oblivion glitch.

[–]necrothe 0 points1 point ago

Wooo I have the same comforter. Comfy as shit.

[–]freethinkingalex 0 points1 point ago

I'm actually surprised to see no comment about the melons resting on the mans melons.

[–]stupidmelon13 0 points1 point ago

Oh there are more than 13 here...

[–]lolpete 0 points1 point ago

...more weight!

[–]Welshpanda 0 points1 point ago

I'd love to die covered in melons!

[–]CapAWESOMEst -2 points-1 points ago

Watermelons = liked by black people = originally from Africa = hot place

So, by using the transitive property I've come to the conclusion that:

Watermelons = hot place.

[–]JohnAbruzzi 0 points1 point ago

There's comical racism then there's being stupid.