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2075
2076

Brazil now has the biggest water slide in the world at 135 feet; people reach speeds of 65 mph (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by mepper

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[–]icyone 984 points985 points ago

It would take you a half hour and an entire crew of paramedics to pull your bathing suit out of your ass.

[–]Primal80s 476 points477 points ago

I remember doing a similar but smaller ride at Wet n Wild in Orlando...it's not the swimsuit up your ass that's the problem. It's the amount of water that forces it's way inside you. I hobbled straight to the bathroom with my hole squeezed tightly to complete my chlorinated enema ಠ_ಠ

[–]dieAna420 191 points192 points ago

haha yes, this happened to my aunt when she went to Oceans of Fun and rode a similar ride to this one. shit herself right as she stood up...lol

[–]VLHACS 160 points161 points ago

Im never going to a water park again.

[–]WhoTookPlasticJesus 70 points71 points ago

The water at Oceans of Fun is easily 15% feces.

[–]bliss72 68 points69 points ago

Oceans of Feces

[–]ASlyGuy 15 points16 points ago

So its still technically Oceans of Fun then?

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      [–]Potchi79 33 points34 points ago

      Gross story, bro.

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        [–]AlisInWonderland 99 points100 points ago

        At least you don't have two holes to worry about (I assume from you comment). I've pretty much felt like I've been raped by water before.

        [–]sternslovchild 16 points17 points ago

        My SO had green poo fall out on a slide in Spain called the detonator, she did the waddle all the way to the loo.

        [–]CowplusCowequalsCows 16 points17 points ago

        Well at least you can't accuse them of false advertising!

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          [–]IAmAtomato 132 points133 points ago

          Ahh, the ol' 'chlorinated enema', we meet again..

          [–]elnrith 59 points60 points ago

          chlorenema?

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            [–]newslang 53 points54 points ago

            It brings me great comfort knowing that I am not the only one who suffered at the hands of Wet & Wild's "Bomb-Bay." They should really attach an anal-rape warning.

            [–]superdouper 47 points48 points ago

            I remember years ago I was at some water park in Crete and went on one of those slides. Instead of a chlorinated enema, I went to the loo after and had a total freak out because my tampon string had totally disappeared. I found it after a few minutes of "getting to know myself better", so all was fine. It was pretty scary for a clueless teenaged girl!

            [–]MikeyBollocks 15 points16 points ago

            Why would you go to a water park on your period? So much risk...

            [–]superdouper 15 points16 points ago

            I know! Thinking about it now it was a totally insane thing to do. It was years ago though, I can't really remember much from the day other than the panic in the toilets, I was only 17. It was probably the last day or so of my period so I mustn't have been too worried.

            [–]MikeyBollocks 26 points27 points ago

            Thank you for the detailed account, it has answered all my questions.

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                [–]helloxcthulhu 15 points16 points ago

                I went on the Der Stuka (sp? Likely butchered the name.) the tallest water slide in the park at Wet n Wild when Vegas had one. My problem was that my body was essentially free-falling for about half the way down after the drop-off. Not touching the slide at all. Once it was over I decided that I would never go near that ride again because I felt like I would go over the side. Not sure if that happened to anyone else. It didn't happen to my friend, who wasn't underweight like me. A year or two later I think some middle-high school kid flew off the side and died. Edit: Apparently my spelling was correct. "Der Stuka" according to Google, translates to "The Dive Bomber" in German.

                [–]asscobra 29 points30 points ago

                How loose is your asshole?!

                [–]mudkipikachu 8 points9 points ago

                I went on the Bombay and instead of keeping my hands across my chest, I freaked out and tried to grab onto the floor as I fell. My arms were flopping around the entire time as I got my worst wedgie ever. True story.

                [–]Sarcastic_Samurai 5 points6 points ago

                Are you talking about the slide where you stand in a bomb and the floor drops away? That ride was great.

                [–]AnotherBlackNerd 4 points5 points ago

                At my local wave-pool they have a submerged bench in the shallow end that has jets along the wall that would hit your back, kind of like a massage section or something. Needless to say I wasn't aware of what would happen if I pressed my bum against one of the jets. I remember laughing at the tickling feeling at first, then a puzzled and shocked look came on my face as I quickly but carefully ran to the changing rooms to release what felt like sooo much water.

                [–]goobersmooch 8 points9 points ago

                So I had that problem once, what sucks is every step a little water squirts out... personally i was deathly afraid it was brown water.

                never again.

                [–]crisk21 3 points4 points ago

                I went on that same one in Orlando. Crazy shit man. It felt like my legs were being stabbed. I didn't experience any liquid going inside of me fortunately.

                [–]hired_goon 3 points4 points ago

                I hobbled straight to the bathroom with my hole squeezed tightly to complete my chlorinated enema

                this seems like good material for r/nocontext

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                  [–]EditingAndLayout 65 points66 points ago

                  Keep your legs crossed.

                  [–]HyzerFlip 5 points6 points ago

                  They have resorted to clipping off the old one and offering a new one at an extreme mark up, alongside very fiberous foods and some muscle relaxers.

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                    [–]THammock 120 points121 points ago

                    With the abundance of speedos in Brazil the paramedics must be making quite the paycheck.

                    [–]dopafiend 8 points9 points ago

                    Speedos are actually much better suited for this sort of thing, regular shorts have a tendency to forcefully inject water into your rectum once you hit the bottom.

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                      [–]cephalgia 6 points7 points ago

                      Brazil now has the biggest enema device in the world at 135 feet; asspipe scouring reaches speeds of 65 mph

                      FTFY.

                      [–]sexi_squidward 15 points16 points ago

                      THIS

                      I'm still near certain my bathing suit traveled into my ass when I went down Summit Plummit in Disney. FUCK THAT

                      [–]dcjournogirl 5 points6 points ago

                      I spent a summer at a swim camp in Orlando, and our evening activities included many trips to blizzard beach.

                      Dudes would wait at the bottom of this (http://www.wdwinfo.com/Photos/Blizzard-Beach/images/Summit%20Plummet%20DSC00019.jpg) to watch the girls whose bathingsuits came off en-route down the slide.

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                        [–]DanRYoung 656 points657 points ago

                        I'd be afraid to go too fast at the start and just fall straight down, hitting the slide at the bottom.

                        [–]hannahjoy33 390 points391 points ago

                        This actually happened to me at a water park once. I was really nervous about going down such a steep and long slide that I went onto the slide with a bit of a jump and pretty much just fell to the bottom, only bumping into the slide three or four times.

                        [–]kactus 461 points462 points ago

                        Shouldn't you be dead?

                        [–]Exaskryz 390 points391 points ago

                        The slide was about 10 feet tall. The bumps were his arms flailing.

                        [–]WhatTheFlux1 300 points301 points ago

                        http://gifsoup.com/view2/1078032/near-death-water-slide-launch-o.gif

                        [–][deleted] ago

                        [deleted]

                        [–]ANAL_PLUNDERING 832 points833 points ago

                        Yeah I know! That gif took forever to load!

                        [–]InvalidWhistle 71 points72 points ago

                        I was like, nothing happened at all, yellow slide looks perfectly safe. Then I was like, Whoa, where'd he come from. Yet I still waited for the near-death part though. Maybe it'll come some day.

                        [–]pompousjohn 13 points14 points ago

                        just keep watching the gif over and over, the near death part shows up on the 113th repeat.

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                          [–]SlimMaculate 4 points5 points ago

                          Version with 95% less loading

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                            [–]SgtDoakes_MF 104 points105 points ago

                            FENTON!!!!

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                                [–]Pinoth 15 points16 points ago

                                He was also 6.

                                [–]gullale 58 points59 points ago

                                This is the internet. hannahjoy33 could be a cat for all we know.

                                [–]kattunge 19 points20 points ago

                                http://i.imgur.com/DbD2r.jpg

                                [–]undercover_GIF 5 points6 points ago

                                yes...

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                                  [–]GauchoDerp 23 points24 points ago

                                  Also have a similar experience. When I was 10 and only weighed about 50 pounds, I went over the drop immediately being sent into the air. I landed back on with the right side of my body off the edge of the slide. Was lucky enough to make it back on the slide but not before getting pretty bad cuts all along my leg and side of my back. Its not that scary, they said. You'll be fine, they said. Never again.

                                  [–]BootWizard 5 points6 points ago

                                  We used to have a seven story tall (70ft) slide at a water park here in Florida, but it was removed sadly...I went down it ONCE and I can confirm that it was almost exactly like falling off of a tall building and landing in a puddle of water

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                                    [–]Deracination 127 points128 points ago

                                    This raises a serious issue: if you were to push off of it at some point, wouldn't you just go into freefall until you slammed back into it?

                                    [–]wasserbrunner 107 points108 points ago

                                    as shown here, it's not nearly as steep as it appears

                                    [–]PhilbertMcFilibuster 140 points141 points ago

                                    Yeah, like, if your ass cheeks clench as you go over and it pushes you out and away from the slide.

                                    [–]Yuforic 83 points84 points ago

                                    What's the number one killer at water parks?

                                    Pucker Factor.

                                    [–]tnerbusas 30 points31 points ago

                                    Theres something like this at the waterpark near me...you actually do lift off of the slide for a brief moment and slam back into it.

                                    [–]kactus 39 points40 points ago

                                    Probably not. There's still a slight angle when you're going down.

                                    [–]reddell 24 points25 points ago

                                    It doesn't look like much speed would be needed to get away from the slide though. Think if some idiot took a running start and managed to get a few feet of separation. He could freefall 100 feet before the slide caught back up with him.

                                    [–]SwansonHOPS 14 points15 points ago

                                    I imagine it transitions from vertical to horizontal fairly gradually near the bottom, so even if he did do that, the slide would probably be at like a 10 degree angle from the vertical when he came into contact with him. It would hurt his ass probably, but I don't think it would do much damage. I'm sure the slide is designed with this in mind.

                                    [–]trendtracker 31 points32 points ago

                                    Well then of course that idiot would be dead. You could make the same argument for not having the handrails on the stairs 10 feet tall with wires to prevent idiots from sitting on them. Idiots will be idiots. You cannot idiot proof everything.

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                                      [–]GoingToLose 13 points14 points ago

                                      If you go down them with your arms and legs crossed like you're supposed to you shouldn't even be able to push off at all.

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                                        [–]layendecker 104 points105 points ago

                                        I'd be afraid of going down it.

                                        [–]The_blue_pen 340 points341 points ago

                                        Yes, thank you. I believe that's the point everyone is making.

                                        [–]your_penis 59 points60 points ago

                                        But I'd be afraid of it too.

                                        [–]JasonUncensored 20 points21 points ago

                                        I feel similarly. In fact, I don't think that I would voluntarily attempt it at all!

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                                            [–]welltheresAbacon 36 points37 points ago

                                            Straight to the point, I like that.

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                                                [–]themooseiscool 184 points185 points ago

                                                I'd wait for 10 of 10 people to go safely go down it. That's like a 100% safety rate.

                                                [–]Tyko 233 points234 points ago

                                                your math is fucking flawless

                                                [–]Pointland32 62 points63 points ago

                                                "10 out of 10 survivors said they'd recommend it!"

                                                [–]vainamo- 437 points438 points ago

                                                I bet people in Brazil get sick of everything being Jungle-themed.

                                                [–]marconds 182 points183 points ago

                                                YES.

                                                [–]Derperman 58 points59 points ago

                                                I am brazilian and I do. I have a jungle on my backyard for god sake.

                                                [–]computertech 63 points64 points ago

                                                yep...

                                                [–]merwaan123 33 points34 points ago

                                                I though a Brazilian got rid of the jungle

                                                [–]bkporque 28 points29 points ago

                                                As a Brazilian that moved to the US, I've seen more jungle in Conway, South Carolina than I ever did in Sao Paulo

                                                [–]DroppedOnHead 27 points28 points ago

                                                Couldn't agree more.

                                                [–]cannedmath 36 points37 points ago

                                                Might as well have stayed at home!

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                                                  [–]theparaiba 67 points68 points ago

                                                  Ok, some facts:

                                                  1 - This is the Insano water slide at Beach Park Fortaleza.

                                                  2 - It's not really new, I think it was built around 1995-6.

                                                  3 - I don't think there's ever been any serious accidents there. Aside from getting the wedgie of the ages you're pretty much safe.

                                                  4 - I've been there in 1998 and holy shit it's a great feeling.

                                                  [–]superaccurate 12 points13 points ago

                                                  I live in Fortaleza and there is no record of serious accidents, true

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                                                    [–]EditingAndLayout 420 points421 points ago

                                                    ...and as the day goes on, the water turns deeper shades of yellow and brown.

                                                    [–]perfect_exceeder 369 points370 points ago

                                                    or red with the blood of 65mph injuries

                                                    [–][deleted] 150 points151 points ago

                                                    Razor blades stuck in the slide.

                                                    [–]Casowsky 233 points234 points ago

                                                    http://i.imgur.com/k9k2F.jpg

                                                    [–]Damasticator 220 points221 points ago

                                                    That looks grate!

                                                    [–]ANAL_PLUNDERING 35 points36 points ago

                                                    Cheese having so much fun!

                                                    [–]austex_mike 14 points15 points ago

                                                    That kid has a zest for life.

                                                    [–]wrongsideofthewire 15 points16 points ago

                                                    Not a shred of care.

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                                                        [–]FigNag 74 points75 points ago

                                                        Please tell me this isn't actually a thing.

                                                        [–]judgej2 42 points43 points ago

                                                        There are always stories about it, at every park. I real thing? No idea.

                                                        [–]cakeandpiday 30 points31 points ago

                                                        The fiberglass can wear at points and even scratch (very rare) but razorblades are pretty much a myth. How you would attach it?

                                                        Source: I worked at Soak City

                                                        [–]TacosDeCabeza 21 points22 points ago

                                                        I got messed up pretty bad at Crystal River Water Park in Augusta, GA. Someone dropped a snickers bar in the tube and I guess the caramel stuck to a dry spot.

                                                        [–]steviesteveo12 78 points79 points ago

                                                        Who the fuck brings a Snickers on a water slide?

                                                        [–]drunkenmumbler 131 points132 points ago

                                                        'MERICA!

                                                        [–]MugsBeany 8 points9 points ago

                                                        I want the entire pool scrubbed, sterilized, and disinfected!

                                                        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPxiXGr9nFM

                                                        [–]ze_ben 9 points10 points ago

                                                        This is the Jeopardy answer to the clue "America"

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                                                                  [–]Tyko 61 points62 points ago

                                                                  i hate you

                                                                  cannot unread

                                                                  never going on another slide again.

                                                                  [–]tropo 15 points16 points ago

                                                                  You just ruined all water slides for me. I will always be afraid of this.

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                                                                      [–]beggars_velvet 19 points20 points ago

                                                                      With the added pleasure of the world's biggest wedgie, this is slide has it all!

                                                                      [–]PineappleOnMyHead 14 points15 points ago

                                                                      Skid marks ... skid marks all the way!

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                                                                        [–]Fricstopher 184 points185 points ago

                                                                        Relevant

                                                                        [–]watson_and_crick 692 points693 points ago

                                                                        Everyone on here is saying NOPE... all I could think of is FUCK YES! I want to be there now

                                                                        [–]bigandrewgold 46 points47 points ago

                                                                        Go to Disney, their slide is no baby

                                                                        [–]Electricakes 22 points23 points ago

                                                                        Oh man, ain't that the truth. I've been on it three times, and each time I really hesitated, just because it looks like a 90 degree drop when you're on top. Plus you can see the whole park... and it's all so high and...

                                                                        Good times!

                                                                        [–]MFORCE310 5 points6 points ago

                                                                        This comment just made me nostalgic for a place I've never been.

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                                                                          [–]Walawalawow 23 points24 points ago

                                                                          I once went down Summit Plummit. Waaaaay scarier than I anticipated. I was all like "Pfft, it's Disney. How scary could it really get?" By the time I got to the bottom of the slide, I had developed a serious fear of heights.

                                                                          [–]sexi_squidward 18 points19 points ago

                                                                          My friend made me do it...I remember getting to the top and looking down like...fuck this I'm gonna walk --- ::turns around::

                                                                          I'm lazy...I'll just go down this...OMG WHY DID I DO THAT?!

                                                                          [–]crandamaniac 10 points11 points ago

                                                                          My wife wouldn't go down that slide, so she sat at the bottom and waited for me. She said that the people ahead of me were hitting about 52-54 mph. I hit 57 mph. And I would totally go back on it.

                                                                          [–]Lord-Longbottom 19 points20 points ago

                                                                          (For us English aristocrats, I leave you this 54 mph -> 145152.0 Furlongs/Fortnight, 57 mph -> 153216.0 Furlongs/Fortnight) - Pip pip cheerio chaps!

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                                                                                [–]Osiris32 58 points59 points ago

                                                                                As a fellow adrenalin junkie, oh hell yes I'd do this.

                                                                                BRB, Brazil.

                                                                                [–]zstone 38 points39 points ago

                                                                                "BRB, Brazil." is my life motto, and also a slogan I sold to the Brazilian National Chamber of Commerce. That'll be about tree fiddy for my royalties, please.

                                                                                [–]Osiris32 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                Goddamn Loch Ness Monster, you get outta here!!

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                                                                                  [–]jbeck17 187 points188 points ago

                                                                                  You're not alone bro, I would love to do this.

                                                                                  [–]KeepingKidsOnShred 181 points182 points ago

                                                                                  Shaka Brah!

                                                                                  [–]ITSigno 101 points102 points ago

                                                                                  Shaka, when the walls fell.

                                                                                  [–]zstone 53 points54 points ago

                                                                                  Darmok, his eyes covered (with swim goggles).

                                                                                  [–]ubermex 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                  Darmok, his ass wedgied

                                                                                  [–][deleted] 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                  Jalad, her top came off

                                                                                  [–]ubermex 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                  Temba, his fingers wide

                                                                                  [–]trodontreadll 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                  at Tanagra.

                                                                                  [–]RockasaurusRex 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                  Her sails unfurled.

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                                                                                    [–]jeanlucinurbutt 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                    I feel like my username is being summoned...

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                                                                                        [–]APPCRASH 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                        http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_RccTLu6UaMc/Sm9SQW2QkwI/AAAAAAAAAao/vpspxL1prnA/s320/darmok+and+jalad.jpg

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                                                                                              [–]crotchcritters 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                              I want to go to there

                                                                                              [–]PapauNewGuinea 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                              I would be up there with you, but I would be super hesitant those first seconds, I mean you know there's a 135 foot drop, and you look at the ledge and see this. Scary stuff

                                                                                              [–]OCedHrt 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                              I'd be screaming like a girl and then probably choke on water and drown.

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                                                                                                  [–]buterbetterbater 81 points82 points ago

                                                                                                  video

                                                                                                  [–]That_Deaf_Guy 74 points75 points ago

                                                                                                  Seeing this video doesn't make it look THAT bad to be honest

                                                                                                  [–]jayen 31 points32 points ago

                                                                                                  that doesn't look too scary.

                                                                                                  [–]ICouldEatAKnobAtNite 92 points93 points ago

                                                                                                  Better video

                                                                                                  [–]Dyltra 29 points30 points ago

                                                                                                  That was it? Disappointment.

                                                                                                  [–]Locrius 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                  You can't really judge it by the video right? Something that doesn't show here is that you free fall (your back does not touch the warterslide) for like less than 1 sec...

                                                                                                  [–]potatoriot 57 points58 points ago

                                                                                                  Wait two hours in line to ride biggest water slide....lasts 3 seconds.

                                                                                                  [–]ireland123 95 points96 points ago

                                                                                                  Sounds like something my wife said on our wedding night.

                                                                                                  [–]svengalus 88 points89 points ago

                                                                                                  There was a line?

                                                                                                  [–]UMDSmith 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                  Yep, I was 3rd in line, would ride again!

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                                                                                                      [–]reddell 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                      That actually looks pretty tame now.

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                                                                                                        [–]BoonTobias 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                        Actually now I want to do it

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                                                                                                          [–]JIZZING_ON_REDDIT 961 points962 points ago

                                                                                                          View from the top, right before you start moving. NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE

                                                                                                          [–]EditingAndLayout 386 points387 points ago

                                                                                                          This gives new meaning to the term "poop chute."

                                                                                                          [–]exjentric 125 points126 points ago

                                                                                                          Yeah, it's a good thing it's a water slide, because I would pee my pants/bathing suit.

                                                                                                          [–]Browncoat23 30 points31 points ago

                                                                                                          The bathing suit is going to be permanently lodged in your rectum when you reach the bottom, so have fun with that.

                                                                                                          [–]Platypuskeeper 80 points81 points ago

                                                                                                          In Brazil, they encourage that.

                                                                                                          [–]pussy_muncher 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                          They should encourage "waffle stomping" too.

                                                                                                          [–]_archer_ 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                          why?

                                                                                                          [–]Platypuskeeper 91 points92 points ago

                                                                                                          To conserve water?

                                                                                                          [–]judgej2 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                                          It's making use of water that you are flushing down the drain anyway.

                                                                                                          [–]H-Resin 2 points3 points ago

                                                                                                          It can actually save something like 1100 (or maybe it was 11,000 but that seems a bit too high of a figure) gallons of water per year if you pee in the shower in the morning

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                                                                                                                [–]omiyage 184 points185 points ago

                                                                                                                The seagulls flying bellow you really add a nice touch.

                                                                                                                [–]jennyfofenny 118 points119 points ago

                                                                                                                And the clouds...

                                                                                                                [–]BoonTobias 33 points34 points ago

                                                                                                                And the ocean...

                                                                                                                [–]CarlJibbs 497 points498 points ago

                                                                                                                Those are vultures.

                                                                                                                [–]60565 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                Mmmmm, bellowing seagulls.....

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                                                                                                                  [–]perfect_exceeder 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                                                  At least if you overshoot the landing and scorch your bum across the sand and trees there, eventually you'll land in the ocean (possibly unconscious), so there's some comfort in that.

                                                                                                                  [–]Exaskryz 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                                  If I can't swim when I'm conscious, you expect me to when I'm unconscious?

                                                                                                                  [–]perfect_exceeder 45 points46 points ago

                                                                                                                  No, but you can have a nice, peaceful ocean drowning death.

                                                                                                                  [–]cyberslick188 49 points50 points ago

                                                                                                                  Ahhh, drowning and being burned alive. The two most peaceful ways to die.

                                                                                                                  Think about it. Who loves peace and quiet? Monks.

                                                                                                                  Who likes to die in a fiery blaze? Monks.

                                                                                                                  Checkmate.

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                                                                                                                      [–]swankypants 176 points177 points ago

                                                                                                                      judging from the video posted below, this photo doesn't look accurate at all. look at the video and imagine, as the photo suggests, that there are clouds and seagulls below the top of the slide. this, my fair chaps, is a veritable exaggeration of the brazilian kind.

                                                                                                                      [–]oldaccount 26 points27 points ago

                                                                                                                      This is not a picture of the same slide as OP. This picture is clearly a photoshop and the Brazilian slide does not face the beach like this picture.

                                                                                                                      [–]Exaskryz 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                                                      Look at the legs. It must've been awkward getting a tan with knee high socks on.

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                                                                                                                        [–]stashew 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                                        My brain punched me in the skull when I saw this.

                                                                                                                        [–]Tiop 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                        I can feel my feet and hands tingling.

                                                                                                                        [–]SwollenPickle 40 points41 points ago

                                                                                                                        sweet mother of god.

                                                                                                                        [–]K-Rex-TW 20 points21 points ago

                                                                                                                        That actually caused a skip in my heart.

                                                                                                                        [–]football2106 6 points7 points ago

                                                                                                                        Any known videos of people recording their trip down?

                                                                                                                        [–]JSchook92 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                        Agreed, biggest nope ever thanks for the awesome pic.

                                                                                                                        [–]spacedicksastronaut 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                        This looks really fake/shopped.

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                                                                                                                          [–]fionnt 163 points164 points ago

                                                                                                                          i'll put that in the, 'don't think so' file and store it in the, 'never going to happen' department. i may review the file when i get notification that hell has frozen over. but probably not.

                                                                                                                          [–]EditingAndLayout 44 points45 points ago

                                                                                                                          "But look, you found the notice, didn't you?"

                                                                                                                          "Yes," said Arthur, "yes I did. It was on display in the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying Beware of the Leopard."

                                                                                                                          [–]fionnt 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                                                          douglas adams died, so i'm using his material. believe me, he doesn't need it anymore. (tip of the hat to DA and no offence intended).

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                                                                                                                            [–]razorbackgeek 14 points15 points ago

                                                                                                                            So that's how Brazilians get their thongs.

                                                                                                                            [–]plain_mike3824 96 points97 points ago

                                                                                                                            Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

                                                                                                                            title comnts points age /r/
                                                                                                                            Id be afraid of losing contact with the slide on the way down 2coms 2pts 1mo pics
                                                                                                                            Worlds tallest water slide. 29coms 105pts 1mo pics
                                                                                                                            meet Insano. world tallest waterslide 5coms 11pts 1yr pics
                                                                                                                            The Insano Beach Park, Brazil. 3coms 10pts 5mos pics
                                                                                                                            Ultimate WaterSlide 15coms 23pts 8mos pics
                                                                                                                            Best. Slide. Ever. 8coms 13pts 9mos pics
                                                                                                                            You'll need to wear a diaper for this one 163coms 202pts 1yr pics
                                                                                                                            I shit my pants just looking at it. 12coms 18pts 1yr pics
                                                                                                                            Scariest waterslide ever? 57coms 110pts 8mos pics

                                                                                                                            source: karmadecay

                                                                                                                            [–]dieAna420 12 points13 points ago

                                                                                                                            wow, dude really loves this slide lol

                                                                                                                            [–]BlacktoseIntolerant 25 points26 points ago

                                                                                                                            My asshole: "If you ride that, I'm outta here"

                                                                                                                            [–]barkbitch 11 points12 points ago

                                                                                                                            Looks like a great way to lose a bikini top.

                                                                                                                            [–]baka_toroi 19 points20 points ago

                                                                                                                            Where the FUCK are those metric bots when you need them?

                                                                                                                            41 meters

                                                                                                                            105 KM/h

                                                                                                                            [–]pierenjan 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                            Thanks.

                                                                                                                            [–]Grova 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                            That's cool and everything but not for me.

                                                                                                                            [–]potatome 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                            I will ride this only when I reach the age of 90 so that no one will question me when I shit myself.

                                                                                                                            [–]xHaVK 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                            They have one like this at Dolly Parton's water park. Basically, it scrapes the skin off your back and puts your shorts up your ass.

                                                                                                                            [–]enanox 17 points18 points ago

                                                                                                                            POV hehe (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6Q0XNxsz54)

                                                                                                                            [–]janglyparts 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                            there's a tall slide like that in socal at raging waters. it's not 135ft, but it's terrifying.

                                                                                                                            [–]Thats-Awkward 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                            no thanks. i like my swimsuit bottoms where they are.

                                                                                                                            [–]perfect_exceeder 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                            Considering your username, I'm going to guess this isn't the first time you've said that.

                                                                                                                            [–]andrewsmith1986 77 points78 points ago

                                                                                                                            Baton rouge had one kinda like this until people started getting blown off.

                                                                                                                            Now it is covered.

                                                                                                                            [–]rhayward 23 points24 points ago

                                                                                                                            For my virginity's sake, I must go to Brazil now.

                                                                                                                            [–]mynameisNEO 16 points17 points ago

                                                                                                                            rhayward two weeks later: "Finally got blown off a Brazilian today. Will post pics."

                                                                                                                            [–]merecido 27 points28 points ago

                                                                                                                            Blonde: "I just had sex with a brazillian!"

                                                                                                                            Blonde's friend: "Really? wow! How many is that?"

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                                                                                                                                [–]BayouBengal032 22 points23 points ago

                                                                                                                                Yeah but the one at Blue Bayou is, what, 50 feet maybe?

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                                                                                                                                  [–]TrevolutionNow 7 points8 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Blizzard Beach at Disneyworld has one that is 120 and goes between 50-60 mph for those of you stateside. It does indeed hurt to stop.

                                                                                                                                  [–]pacman359 9 points10 points ago

                                                                                                                                  I HAVE BEEN ON THIS. It's so fucking scary because it's so steep that occasionally, you leave the slide and you just feel like ur falling from a cliff. Then ur ass touches down again and ur sense of relief only lasts until you realize that the little bumps are destroying your tailbone and lower back. I'd still do it again tho

                                                                                                                                  [–]AintMilkBrilliant 5 points6 points ago

                                                                                                                                  now has the biggest water slide...

                                                                                                                                  Pretty sure I've seen this image a long time ago. Still that thing looks frightfully fun! Might have to wear some tight pants under the swimwear though.

                                                                                                                                  [–]i-hate-everything 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                  That looks sketchy as fuck.

                                                                                                                                  [–]Hippo78 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                  Not sure I buy the 65 mph claim. 135 feet of resistanceless free fall will only get you up to 63.38 mph; surely there is non-negligible friction on a slide, especially once you reach a high velocity, so I doubt the real number would even be close to that.

                                                                                                                                  [–]GIANT_FROM_SPACE 35 points36 points ago

                                                                                                                                  At the risk of over-generalizing, I've seen enough crazy shit go wrong in Brazil to totally pass on this slide..

                                                                                                                                  (I've traveled in Brazil and I love Brazil. It's just that I wouldn't necessarily trust that the slide had had all the safety checks and regulations I'd hope it had before jumping on it.)

                                                                                                                                  [–][deleted] ago

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                                                                                                                                  [–]Hiyasc 15 points16 points ago

                                                                                                                                  For anyone that doesn't know.

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                                                                                                                                      [–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

                                                                                                                                      What in the? What the?? Fuck that madness.

                                                                                                                                      [–]Feenster 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                      I've been on the 120' Summit Plummet before. When you are at the top about to go down you can't see the slide and it looks so much like you are going to just slide off into the air to your death.

                                                                                                                                      [–]phong3d 4 points5 points ago

                                                                                                                                      Somebody ask OceanSkys if he's game for this.

                                                                                                                                      [–]VaJones 8 points9 points ago

                                                                                                                                      you spelled dookie chute wrong.

                                                                                                                                      I would literally be shitting myself down the entire thing.

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