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1041
1042

Uhm...Acquaintances? (explosm.net)

submitted ago by Forever-A-Note

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[–]ThrowawayBiGuy 45 points46 points ago

I just had this happen in real life. :(

[–]Dielji 35 points36 points ago

Same here. We hadn't talked in months, then she invited me to coffee out of the blue. We talked for a while, then she told me we couldn't be friends anymore because she thought I had a crush on her. I actually didn't. It was awkward.

[–]jumalaw 37 points38 points ago

I hope after she said you had a crush on her that you replied, "I didn't," in a deadpan face and stared.

...and stared.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points ago

and then awkward.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points ago

Then calmly begin taking the items off the table setting them aside and then gently put the table on it's side as it has been flipped while remaining locked to her eyes.

[–]snatchinyopeopleup 2 points3 points ago

Then, pull out a testicle.

[–]necrons_ftw 18 points19 points ago

Should have gone down like this

Um.....no I don't

well why don't you?

Cause I find you offensive to all five senses.

(exit stage left)

[–]floatablepie 2 points3 points ago

"you know how when you smell something sometimes it gets in your mouth and you can kind of taste it?"

[–]Hounmlayn 9 points10 points ago

WTF? So she broke your friendship over the fact that she's stuck up her own arse? If she thought you liked her, she must have been doing that passive flirting to see if you reacted, but since you weren't attracted that way, you just went with it thinking it's friendly fun. Just my 2 cents. You deserve better friends than people who think you're into them.

[–]YahwehNoway 16 points17 points ago

Dielji then walked out on hur across da rode and suddnly get hit by a car.

Gurl then ran out cryin with Dielji in her arms and whispered

"We cant B frends N-ymore cuz I had a crush on u too"

liek dis if u cry everytiem

[–]solarnexus 7 points8 points ago

How does this actually happen? I'm seriously wondering what sequence of events leads up to people having to feel like they have to 'break up' a friendship?

maybe I'm just too used to the whole forever alone (or more satisfying "lone wolf"... rawr) attitude, but if people generally don't want to hang out anymore they've just not been around as much and after a while you just realise you haven't talked in ages and it becomes an unspoken, but agreed, 'thing' that you aren't really friends any more.

thats certainly how I've done it when people get a bit clingy or whatever.

it seems a bit less cruel than sitting a person down and pointing out that you don't want to hang around with them anymore.

maybe I'm just seeing it too much from a stereotypical male perspective, where most guy friends' relationships aren't particularly deep. all it takes for a guy to be a friend often is availability, location and that they're not a dick and/or have something in common.

I dont know. you humans confuse me.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Godslilmuffin 0 points1 point ago

You lost me at My husband and I

[–]ThrowawayBiGuy 2 points3 points ago

Well, this happens when weird attachement stuff comes into play. My wife and I went to a pride festival with a friend of mine and his fiancee. We ended up at a gay bar for dancing that evening. My friend was dancing with his man and I was dancing with my lady when a cute, stranger guy started eyeing me. I asked my wife if it was cool to dance with him and she gave me the go-ahead. My friend ended up RUNNING OUT OF THE BAR CRYING when he saw me.

Apparently, I made him feel very uncomfortable for abandoning the group. He felt I should have asked his permission to dance with anyone else. Basically, the guy got really possessive and weird. The next morning I got a Facebook message from him telling me he didn't want to be my friend anymore based on my "recent behavior." Both by wife and I were baffled.

He had told me in the past that he was jealous of me; I was more desirable from the "gay" perspective or something. Add in that I recently lost some weight and also my friend's relationship was a bit rocky and you have a recipe for a distraught dramatic gay man. It's unfortunate that he decided to get weird because I did like the guy.

[–]FreeBribes 2 points3 points ago

I've never been directly broken up with; it's more like people just don't ever return your calls and always have excuses... when you realize everything is one-way and not really there, you gotta move on.

[–]TheZakkyStardust 1 point2 points ago

I know that feel, bro. Hug me.

[–]ThrowawayBiGuy 1 point2 points ago

Thanks, bro. Just enough homo.

[–]muistan7 0 points1 point ago

Same... but more like she couldn't be my friend because of depression issues.

[–]ThrowawayBiGuy 0 points1 point ago

He couldn't be my friend because of attachment issues. Dem issues man.

[–]NightlyNews -1 points0 points ago

I don't know enough about psychology to give meaningful advice, but I'm depressed lets lose some friends sounds fucking retarded.

[–]slyguy183 0 points1 point ago

Could be the dude had depression issues

[–]xavier47 0 points1 point ago

when I was really depressed, I would push away friends

I didn't want human contact or compassion, I wanted to have the miserable life that matched the way I felt

the world is your perception of it

[–]john12933 10 points11 points ago

Acquaintance zoned.

[–]HGual-B-gone 7 points8 points ago

I don't understand why they broke up as friends in the first place. The green guy looks appreciative.

[–]Forever-A-Note[S] 6 points7 points ago

Clearly, the green guy has separation issues and the blue guy is trying to get him to become more independent. Theirs was a special kind of bromance.

[–]utsavman 6 points7 points ago

Somebody that I used to know ?

[–]noddingacquaintance 9 points10 points ago

I never thought my username would be relevant.

[–]Jobo50 7 points8 points ago

I'm not sure if the funny outweighs the sadness of this comic.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

http://www.explosm.net/comics/2807/

Link to the website.

[–]teetones 4 points5 points ago

I did this with a creepy friend. People would always ask me to stop bringing him over, so I finely just broke things off. He continued to call/text and ended up writing a gay love rap song about me. No fucking joke.

[–]Phoequinox 1 point2 points ago

This was one of the best C&Hs in months. They've been rather dry lately. 1 every week or two will have a good joke, but they used to be very consistent with their humor. But I can't complain. Their format of having four guys with unique styles doing the comics is one of the best of any other webcomic. Matt's are usually the weakest, but he's had some really good ones lately.

[–]vi-tone 1 point2 points ago

When I was in 2nd grade, this chick I was friends acquaintance-zoned me. "We can still hang out", she said. Only friends do that. single tear

[–]random_apples 1 point2 points ago

Two now ex-friends slept with my ex two days ago. Not a groovy time right now.

[–]johnny__blazee 3 points4 points ago

Seinfeld wants his jokes back.

[–]LSN_ 2 points3 points ago

"Listen Joel...this friendship, it's not working."

[–]beachjustice 1 point2 points ago

We can still exist amongst each other just not within the immediate vicinity of each other.

[–]Xemic 0 points1 point ago

there's no need to front, let's be frieeeeeends...

[–]skibblez_n_zits 0 points1 point ago

I've never had this happen to me, I usually just ignore texts/stop calling/hanging out... eventually they get the drift. In other words, I just "fix the glitch" à la Office Space. Problem solved from here, Bob.

[–]Alexiel17 0 points1 point ago

Wasn't this posted about 3 or 4 days ago?

[–]kiwiman40 0 points1 point ago

i thought the EXACT same thing when i read this earlier!!

[–]themooseiscool -1 points0 points ago

Link, dammit!

[–]lilshawtay0193 -3 points-2 points ago

Am I the only one that stared at the word "up" thinking it was "lip" ...

[–]chuhai -3 points-2 points ago

There is a girl I know I want to friend break up with, but I'm too chicken shit. I just ignore her texts and facebook messages, hoping she'll get the message. Half tempted to post this on her FB wall and de-friend her. Too mean?

[–]Forever-A-Note[S] 0 points1 point ago

I would not suggest posting this on her wall and de-friending her. That would make you seem like a major douche. However, you should probably explain why you don't want to be friends if there's an actual reason besides "just grew apart".

[–]chuhai 0 points1 point ago

Not going to actually do that, was just tempted. List of reasons?... She's a liar, she's immature and she's irresponsible. Example: she purchased two ducklings when unemployed and thought it'd be cool to let them roam her backyard. They were attacked by a creature she claims is the neighbors "vicious" cat. She is now attempting to sue the owner's cat when she is just as responsible for what happened to the duckling. Also, she created a fb page to raise money for the duck, but has the funds to sue the neighbor.

Honestly, I could go on...

[–]Forever-A-Note[S] 0 points1 point ago

Those poor ducklings! You don't just let them roam the yard, you're supposed to keep them in something-anything- that prevents hawks and whatnot from hurting them. I can understand why you wouldn't want to be her friend anymore. Just tell her that the way she is acting has caused you to rethink your friendship and you don't want to be friends with someone as irresponsible as her. Or just delete her from Facebook and ignore her...

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