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I still don't get it. (i.imgur.com)

submitted ago by Cutsman3

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[–]spartan4333 15 points16 points ago

They live in Portland.

[–]Crash_Test_Dummy66 1 point2 points ago

Im from Portland and I don't get it...

[–]thatmattperson 0 points1 point ago

Its a joke from the Tv show Portlandia.

[–]Crash_Test_Dummy66 2 points3 points ago

Oh of course.... now I feel stupid.

[–]yourmothersgun 0 points1 point ago

I'm from Portland too. Never seen a Kitten in a dumpster.... But I haven't been looking in many dumpsters.

[–]get_her_a_repost 1 point2 points ago

awww, who would throw a friend out like this?

[–]EpicJ 53 points54 points ago

  1. adopt cat

  2. place in dumpster

  3. ?????

  4. Profit

[–]ImminentFate 7 points8 points ago

More like 1. Adopt cat 2. Place in Dumpster 3. ????? 4. Karma Whore

[–]CeeBeast 6 points7 points ago

The Karma IS profit to the people in /r/aww.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

where "adopt cat" is code for "steal neighbor's cat".

[–]failbot88 8 points9 points ago

The steps to success and karma!

[–]I_Throw_Cats_Away 4 points5 points ago

You're welcome.

[–]wanderso24 1 point2 points ago

/r/KarmaConspiracy

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]aliencat1001 0 points1 point ago

Pro tip: STFU

[–]OfThriceAndTen[M] -1 points0 points ago

If you don't stop spamming with this comment. I'm going to ban you from Advice Animals.

[–]Ugbrog 2 points3 points ago

/r/KarmaConspiracy

[–]Either_Aether 1 point2 points ago

standard karma cookie cutter

[–]stickynotestickman 1 point2 points ago

Pre-dumpster-dunked cats, available at your local pet shoppe now: http://i.imgur.com/Jjv8n.jpg

[–]ChrisQF 36 points37 points ago

because the rules of r/aww is that the more horrid and implausible place you make up and say you found your pet cat in the more karma you get. simplified version: because people on r/aww lie.

[–]Afrowalrus03 52 points53 points ago

"Just rescued a cat from an erupting volcano. KARMA NOW"

[–]BefWithAnF 1 point2 points ago

"I found this kitten in my microwave. WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?"

[–]CHEWS_OWN_FORESKIN 6 points7 points ago

I found my cat chewing someone elses foresking...karma?

[–]plasticbandages 1 point2 points ago

Foresking, foreshame.

[–]CHEWS_OWN_FORESKIN 1 point2 points ago

Don't knock it until you've tried it. Foresking is a little gamier than foreskin, but still enjoyable...it's like going down on a girl that just finished mowing the lawn in July.

[–]plasticbandages 1 point2 points ago

Foreshame is pretty good too. Tastes like going down on a girl who just finished mowing the lawn in July..'s father.

[–]PleinairAllaprima 4 points5 points ago

That actually became a fad about 6 months ago.

There are more but those four are perfect examples.

[–]ChrisQF 0 points1 point ago

oh god those made me laugh

[–]orangestrikes 2 points3 points ago

It's good to know that my cynicism is justified.

I like r/catpictures. Fewer lies, more "here's a picture of my cat."

[–]Gramertrol 2 points3 points ago

But why would you want to put your cat in the dumpster for Karma?

[–]SonsofLoki 3 points4 points ago

For karma

[–]get_her_a_repost 2 points3 points ago

I rescued my kitten from petsmart, upvotes to the left.

[–]Obskulum 1 point2 points ago

Yep. There are the very rare cases in which the stories are true, but that's usually with photo evidence (cats or dogs looking mussed over/and or with casts and visible injury).

At this point it's hard to believe anything. I looked at that "my mother has cancer and my girlfriend left me" with a big suuuuuuure.

[–]guyjin 1 point2 points ago

Stray kittens might make their way into dumpsters looking for food. I found one this way, but didn't cash in the karma.

[–]apullin 1 point2 points ago

r/aww isn't about pets. I created /r/aww because people were just using their pets as a way to justify posting a picture of their face.

[–]flamingfungi 1 point2 points ago

I expressed a single iota of skepticism once in r/aww once, and was downvoted to -14 instantly

[–]Hyperdrunk 1 point2 points ago

/r/aww has given me the belief that if I don't want a kitten I should just chuck it in a dumpster..... another Redditor will find said kitten and all will be well.

It's like giving it up for adoption, the trustworthy way.

[–]wtfomg 16 points17 points ago

Because some motherfuckers put unwanted pets in dumpsters.

I've volunteered at my local city animal shelter for a little over 4 years, and people find animals all over the place. One of my cats was found alone in the street at 2 weeks - luckily found by animal control. My other cat literally walked into the Animal Shelter, after spending time in the neighboring DPS yard.

Anyway, most of these cats are likely not in dumpsters but under them. Cover from the rain, small enough to feel secure but big enough to fit in. Lots of opportunity for spare food around them.

[–]SicilianEggplant 1 point2 points ago

I'm not convinced on the mass amount of people throwing kittens in dumpsters. It just seems like a lot of work for an asshole to do. I mean, I'm sure it happens, but with every other poster in r/aww finding dumpster cats I don't think they all are.

I think it's more likely that cats go and hide in and around dumpsters like you said, but rather for the concealment and shelter to have their babies. People wander by and just think, "Oh, hey. Dumpster cat. I could use some karma!". Meanwhile momma cat comes back and cries herself to sleep because her children are missing.

[–]wtfomg 2 points3 points ago

Your assessment is pretty right on in some cases - aside from the bit about the mother cat feeling bad about her kids being gone. Having spent so much time with pregnant cats, kittens, etc at the shelter.. some may actually be upset, but lots of cats seem to only begrudgingly take care of their kittens. In human care they are usually separated relatively quickly, too (anytime after 3 weeks is generally okay, but longer is better).

Cats are so not suited to live outside in urban environments, though. They do okay, compared to our other domesticated animals, but it really is not great for them. People having indoor-outdoor or even full on barn cats is not too bad in rural areas.. but the idea of cats giving birth and trying to raise kittens alone by a dumpster is pretty fucking sad.

Anyway, /r/aww is shit and people will always exaggerate or lie for imaginary internet points.

[–]catjuggler 1 point2 points ago

I'm so sick of Redditors complaining about the feelings of mama cats. It's the most ridiculous argument. Mothers are very happy to be rid of offspring at a certain point. If they're not at that point, they'll get over that in about a day. Compare that to the lifetime of misery of a feral cat that was not taken from its mother at a young enough age to be socialized.

[–]jonosvision 1 point2 points ago

My sister was the worst when it came to that. We adopted sibling cats together while she was pregnant. All I would have to do to make her cry when i visted was say "I wonder if Skittles misses his Mom? I wonder if his Mom wonders why her babies suddenly got taken away?" And she would just bawl, it was great.

[–]SicilianEggplant 0 points1 point ago

I wasn't serious... Just trying to make people feel bad for stealing innocent kittens away from their families!

[–]catjuggler 0 points1 point ago

I think people here do seriously complain about it though... although maybe they're all joking? I hope so.

[–]Wut_Du_Fuq_Iz_Brunch 0 points1 point ago

Finish the joke: So a stray cat walks into an animal shelter....

[–]RileyWon 0 points1 point ago

Dude, if my cat was alone in the street and you snatched it I would be pretty pissed off. My cat is pretty friendly around people and I've noticed a few of the neighbours get a little too grabby with him when they think noone is looking, but you did say two weeks old so there's that. Cat collars are designed to come off if they get snagged, so a collarless cat is no excuse. Just sayin'

[–]wtfomg -1 points0 points ago

So don't let you cat out. It's dangerous as fuck in urban areas. Also my cat was brought in by animal control, we raised her from 2 weeks old.

Microchip that feline if you think people will take in all cats without collars (the snap-off collars are a great thing, many outdoor cats do get stuck or even strangle themselves without them).

In my time at the animal shelter I have personally witnessed cats die slowly from drinking anti-freeze, I have seen cats that were hit by cars, and I have seen cats that simply had no business being let outside be severely hurt by other neighborhood cats.

You can do what you like obviously, but this is a topic I hold very dear, and one of the few I will bother to spend time discussing with strangers on the internet. I don't approve of letting cats out in urban areas at all. But then again, it doesn't matter what I approve of - it's your cat. Best of luck.

[–]RileyWon -2 points-1 points ago

I don't approve of having a cat if you're going to keep him locked up his whole life. Would you like to be locked up your whole life because your mom was afraid of you drinking strange fluids? I'd be a terrible parent if i kept a pet that loves to roam and explore indoors for fear that some douche bastard might snag him up at the first thought of "oh hey nice cat." Indoor cats are sedated and miserable. My cat is full of love and spunk and he's made a few friends out there. I'm not about to ruin his life for my own selfish fears.

[–]deidru -1 points0 points ago

Cat takes nap under unassuming person's car or even decides to crawl up in said car's engine. Unassuming person is unaware. Cat gets smooshed or cooked. Neighbor's cat does this all the time. Nobody should have to check for someone else's pet every time they get in the car. We are in a huge appt/town house complex with roadways and parking lots. This is how you get your pet killed. Hell our complex went no outdoor pets now bc of the number of strays & accidents. Edit: yes, I found their dumbass cat in my engine once when I was checking my oil. He had gotten stuck. And like all animals, cats can suffer heatstroke or cold issues that will render them incapable of running out from under a car that just started.

[–]RileyWon 0 points1 point ago

You do realize you can die crossing the street? Have fun staying on this side of the road your whole life.

[–]catjuggler -2 points-1 points ago

Don't let your cat out. Just sayin'

[–]RileyWon -1 points0 points ago

You shouldn't own a cat. Just sayin'

[–]catjuggler -1 points0 points ago

Good, because I don't own "a" cat

[–]RileyWon -1 points0 points ago

Your lack of understanding of the English language and your fatal attempt at a smug pun has only solidified the fact that you shouldn't own multiple cats either.

[–]catjuggler 0 points1 point ago

Well you're not any fun, are you?

[–]RileyWon 0 points1 point ago

More fun than someone who leaves their cats locked up forever. Poor things, always inside, 3-4 hours of time spent with their owner inbetween work and sleep. I shudder at your idea of fun

[–]catjuggler -1 points0 points ago

Cats sleep 16-20hrs/day. Cats that live indoors exclusively live significantly longer than cats with access to the oudoors and outdoor-only cats. I shudder at your idea of responsibility.

[–]RileyWon 0 points1 point ago

I'm not trying to give my cat a long life. I'm trying to give him a happy one. Spare me the bleading heart. Life invovles risk, as much for a cat as it does for you. There's a difference between being resposible and being over protective. He's not out all day, everyday. And he's rarely out at night. When he dies, however he dies, he will have lived a happy life.

[–]ndougla2 0 points1 point ago

I'll break your heart and infuriate you at the same time...saw someone throw a cat out the window on the interstate...I could've followed them and beat them within an inch of their life, but I was talked down...

[–]wtfomg 0 points1 point ago

I know that feel, for sure.

There was actually a local story (Detroit Metro) recently about someone seeing a kitten thrown out of an sub on a highway (going around 70). The people who saw it happen pulled over, found the kitten, and rushed it to the vet. Turned out essentially okay! They adopted the kitten and it made the news.

Moral of the story: People not being total pieces of shit is now so rare it is newsworthy.

[–]SoulTea -1 points0 points ago

Yeah sure tough guy. I'm not advocating animal abuse but the shit people say when they get riled up is hilarious.

HOLD ME BACK MAN, HOLD ME BACK I'LL KILL HIM!

[–]ndougla2 1 point2 points ago

you didn't see the absolute terror on that animal's face...definitely not hilarious...and I've always had far more compassion for animals than people...especially sadistic fucks...if you don't get pissed and want to beat the shit out of someone for being that evil, then you're a coward...once you act like that person, you forfeit any compassion from me, and I can be one cold, heartless fuck when necessary...I have a breaker bar in my truck that would have done the trick nicely, if only there was law governing justifiable assault...we reported his tag number, but I'm certain nothing came of it, he got away with his cruelty, and since there's no such thing as IRL karma, he'll continue to get away with it...and that's the most infuriating part of it...

[–]SoulTea 1 point2 points ago

Nah man I've said the same kind of thing years ago too. I understand the remorse for the animal. People are fucking terrible when it comes to animals. It's shitty that stuff like that happens, but don't go assaulting people and getting thrown in jail over it. I get pissed but what can you do about it? The law sucks.

[–]Noggin_Floggin 4 points5 points ago

Anything for the karma!

[–]Gramertrol 0 points1 point ago

You've got you're priorities wrong! Keep the kitties clean!

[–]sleepy55 3 points4 points ago

The more interesting your story about your pet is, the more karma you get.

[–]firebat707 3 points4 points ago

dumpster is just code word for a friends cats had kittens

[–]mediocrepaintdrawing 2 points3 points ago

http://i.imgur.com/6ZKW7.png

[–]LoganPhyve 2 points3 points ago

One of my two cats was a dumpster cat. She was so emotionally scarred and was frightened of everything. That was nearing 8 years ago. She's a completely different cat now and has a great home.

But seriously, who throws out a perfectly good karma machine cat?

[–]Toribor 1 point2 points ago

I'm just shocked by the apparent success rate.

[–]ModnaRMC 1 point2 points ago

It's because of the r/Aww equation:

cuteness2 x harshness of environment found in = karma

[–]c-mason3 1 point2 points ago

The story you're asking about goes like this... Some guy posted a pic of their new kitten that they had found in the dumpster. Thirty days later, (this past weekend), they throw up a new post of the same cat - 30 days older - showing off the new cat they just got. (I think the new story may have been something about how it just walked into their garage.)

People put two-and-two together, and they called the user out on it. They deleted their account.

[–]niciraci 1 point2 points ago

I look for them everywhere, just happen to find most in dumpsters

[–]FailosoRaptor 1 point2 points ago

I don't know why care about a pointless point system. Its quite silly.

[–]mitrim2 1 point2 points ago

For the same reason you made this meme... for karma

[–]TracyJackson 1 point2 points ago

One of the best uses of this meme that I have witnessed so far.

[–]iolpot 1 point2 points ago

Simple: Karma

[–]oorahyutkill 1 point2 points ago

The only pussy I found in the dumpster belonged to a homeless woman.

Did not want.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

For the approval of strangers on the internet in order to acquire maximum imaginary karma!!

[–]zerounodos 0 points1 point ago

Is the cats that want to be found.

[–]urinsan3 0 points1 point ago

"Jackpot! John - Come over here! I found one!"

"Quick, take a picture and post it - We can put him back after!"

[–]Jackamatack 0 points1 point ago

I saw three ugly cats in the dumpster while in the B.V.I. Also some chickens.

[–]dacah 0 points1 point ago

Go to Axtel ks. The town its known around here for being overrun with stray cats.

[–]ApologiesForThisPost 0 points1 point ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOuCjzVAO_w&t=0m22s

[–]Lot2rocks 0 points1 point ago

I'm pretty sure they initially meant to use it for its actual purpose, but then found a cat in there.

[–]teamfortressclassic 0 points1 point ago

When just a picture of a cat is not enough, it has to be rescued from a dumpster.

Some variations include "rescued hours before being put down" and "Saw some kids torturing this animal and I saved it"

[–]M002 0 points1 point ago

Holy shit thank you, this boggles my mind every time I see a cat post like that, which is like twice a day. Like seriously, it's like these people spend their day searching with the express purpose of rescuing a tiny animal from an obscure place.

[–]jackvenom 0 points1 point ago

I understand that finding a dog or cat in a dumpster is cliche on Reddit, but many people dump unwanted animals in dumpsters. I found my now three year old lab-??? mix abandoned, wet, and cold next to a set of dumpsters in our backwards southern Va home.

[–]griisgriis 0 points1 point ago

It doesn't seem out of the box to me to find cats in dumpsters fairly often...like, really, what is so hard to believe about it? Some people just actually want to take care of a cat. I probably would if I weren't mad allergic. Shit, I helped a turtle cross the road the other day.

[–]arcainic 0 points1 point ago

Don't be so harsh, dumpster diving's the only way some of us can get pussy.

[–]HairyEyebrows 0 points1 point ago

Fuck is not what the Captain of the Enterprise would say. At least not this one.

[–]samx3i 0 points1 point ago

Because the right lie=more karma.

You don't have to be that skeptical to know that there's no way THAT many people rescued, saved, or found pets abandoned in dumpsters.

"Hey, Reddit! Any love for my cat?" 46 points.

"Hey, Reddit! Any love for this cat I pulled out of an incinerator and nursed back to health with my own tete? 4,466 points.

[–]Munakala 0 points1 point ago

They obviously just all throw em there and then take a photo

[–]TotesJellington 0 points1 point ago

Yeah its so stupid. I mean why would someone find a stray animal near a place where people just throw away food? Animals hate food, especially when they are starving.

[–]leroy_sunset 0 points1 point ago

Unsubscribing from /aww was the best thing I ever did.

[–]apullin 0 points1 point ago

No, it's called a "humble brag". The implicit message when they say a cat is a "rescue" is, "I have moral superiority over you, because I accomplished something special via this animal."

[–]HyperShadic9189 0 points1 point ago

For some reason, this reminded me of "Smelly Cat"

[–]applenerd 0 points1 point ago

Wouldn't a distraught cat tend to meow rather incessantly?

[–]Ikinhaszkarmakplx2 0 points1 point ago

Yea, I don't get it either. I'd probably ignore them.

[–]Guns-Cats-andRonPaul 0 points1 point ago

That's where I found my cat

[–]Cutsman3[S] 0 points1 point ago

Haha, you didn't answer the question!

[–]ehlu15 0 points1 point ago

Karma.

[–]Jaybaybaybay 0 points1 point ago

they were meowing

[–]paroxyst 0 points1 point ago

abandoned kittens are very loud. dumpsters have old food in them. kittens find their way to food, get uncomfortable and start crying loudly. eventually someone finds them

[–]JennBella 0 points1 point ago

my cat was found in a box next to a dumpster at the flea market.

[–]gender_bot -4 points-3 points ago

I identified one face in this photo

Face 1:
* 84% confidence that this is a correctly identified face
* Gender is male with 82% confidence
* Persons mood is surprised with 19% confidence
* Persons lips are parted with 58% confidence

Would you like to know more about me? /r/gender_bot

[–]Quaksome 5 points6 points ago

Captain, we found a machine that says you are only 82% male.

[–]treedick2011 -1 points0 points ago

People who find cats and puts them in the dumpster.

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