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top 200 commentsshow all 247

[–]ItsAPokemonBattle 191 points192 points ago

We are so fucked if this guy ever starts teaching.

[–]calle30 129 points130 points ago

Rise of the planet of the Bears

[–]deaft 38 points39 points ago

So why have there been more than one planet of the apes movies and no planet of the bears movies? wtf hollywood?

[–]Siethron 19 points20 points ago

It's a bad idea to give them an idea

[–]GunHungLo 5 points6 points ago

Disneyland tore out Bear Country Jamboree

Public opinion of bears been in decline ever since

[–]khodithelight 1 point2 points ago

Because bears are godless, killing machines and nobody has the ability to control them long enough for a feature length film.

[–]mcritz 3 points4 points ago

Planet of the ninjabears

[–]canadianclub[S] 112 points113 points ago

Original video (it's worth watching): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ghgg_fukbvU

[–]assbangingkidz 70 points71 points ago

I like how at the end he gets bored and tries to give himself head.

[–]OneRomaines 175 points176 points ago

Dude, spoilers.

[–]6times9is42 20 points21 points ago

Neo was dead the whole time!!

[–]C_T_C_C 9 points10 points ago

Wait, no he wasn't? Was he?

[–]sotech 23 points24 points ago

No, but he did kill Dumbledore on page 596.

[–]6times9is42 26 points27 points ago

Tyler durden was actually the name of his sled!

[–]leedorham 6 points7 points ago

Keyser Soze is really Norman Bates dressed up in drag!

[–]FurryEels 9 points10 points ago

Eddie Murphy is every character including Darth Vader

[–]sailingonward 5 points6 points ago

Rosebud dies.

[–]Bloodfeastisleman 7 points8 points ago

Soylent Green is Luke's father

[–]darkneo86 4 points5 points ago

You just ruined Titanic for me. Thanks.

[–]Mrzeede 1 point2 points ago

(He wasn't)

[–]SpelingTroll 0 points1 point ago

Nope, but Zion is actually just another server.

[–]Z0idberg_MD 0 points1 point ago

I still think a much better ending for the Matrix would have been the humans earning victory over the machines only to have the scene pull back to another level of the matrix. The "Escape" to the real work was just another level of control. I said this the very minute I left the theatre disappointed in revelations.

[–]C_T_C_C 2 points3 points ago

I always thought that the whole last part of the 3rd movie was blown way too far our of proportion, and was a bit too unrealistic in my mind. In my personal opinion, it had all been "plausible" until then.

[–]ExpectTheUnexpected 2 points3 points ago

Wat

[–]Goto10 1 point2 points ago

Nothing wrong with this, btw, just saying. We all get bored, fellas.

[–]HigherFive 12 points13 points ago

Sugoi! Sugoi!

[–]concussedYmir 5 points6 points ago

Every video from japan that has something interesting, I can't help but hear the constant "SUGOI".

It's the japanese equivalent of the mid-western housewife going "oh my gosh" constantly in a nasally voice.

[–]Axeman20 7 points8 points ago

[–]HigherFive 1 point2 points ago

Aaw, yeah. I just started watching this yesterday, actually.

[–]unwanted_puppy 1 point2 points ago

that was incredibly irritating.

edit: no offense to the show.

[–]sailingonward 1 point2 points ago

replying so i can watch when i get home from work

[–]betarded 8 points9 points ago

I don't know how, but following random links lead me to watching 30 minutes of Jerry Springer clips. Feels bad, man.

[–]SamWhite 4 points5 points ago

It was the marilyn manson kid, wasn't it?

[–]betarded 1 point2 points ago

That's how it started.

[–]Logical_Psycho 0 points1 point ago

Yes but that led to "boy to girl transformations", I am so confused.

[–]pieguyfly 19 points20 points ago

And so it begins. The great war of our time.

FUCK THIS THE BEARS HAVE STICKS FUCKING RUN THE FUCK AWAY

[–]mcknicker 18 points19 points ago

I, for one, welcome our new ursine overlords.

[–]Freeside1 7 points8 points ago

[–]refresz 19 points20 points ago

[–]yellowcandle 3 points4 points ago

The force is strong with this one...

[–]PureMDC 1 point2 points ago

except he would have gut his head of with this light saber...

oh my god...

THE BEAR IS LIGHT SABER PROOF

RUN FOR YOUR LIVES

[–]Skyless 2 points3 points ago

At one point I was sure it had to be a guy in a suit. I was expecting Ace Ventura to come out of its asshole at any moment.

[–]Zpiritual 4 points5 points ago

First I was unsure if he had really good or really bad coordination but as it went on I realized he had ninja level coordination.

Also I have worse eye-hand coordination than a bear, way to go me...

[–]Xsunshinex1986 1 point2 points ago

So if a bear attacks you in the woods, don't try to fight him off with a stick. Check!

[–]banditski 1 point2 points ago

Imagine what he could do if he had opposable thumbs.

[–]pumpkindog 1 point2 points ago

Or to motivate kung fu students who want to give up because they lost their thumbs in a "tied to a chair in a burning building and had to break my thumbs to slip them through the restraints" type of situation.

[–]Beiz 0 points1 point ago

I bet he's jealous of the panda for this very reason.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago

Man, even the bears in Japan have ninja skills...

[–]JackAceHole 1 point2 points ago

If this was filmed in Japan, shouldn't the title be Karate Bear?

[–]broo20 0 points1 point ago

I like it how he just starts chewing his foot. It's like "wat u doin thar foot, imma bite ya"

[–]SweetNeo85 0 points1 point ago

Somebody tell me this isn't real. It looks so real but HOW CAN THIS BE REAL DUDE MY MIND IS STARTIFGFHF BHSDFJOW WWK>?

[–]Jalenofkake 0 points1 point ago

It's an Asian bear; makes sense that it'd be that talented.

[–]madcaesar 0 points1 point ago

Why can't people hold the damn camera steady?? YOU HAD ONE JOB TO DO! YOU TOSSER!!!

[–]Dev1l5Adv0cat3 0 points1 point ago

There is something in Japan's water...

[–]Violent_Milk 49 points50 points ago

That bear could whoop some serious ass.

[–]MarcusXXIII 20 points21 points ago

here is the original quaterstaff fighting technique

[–]gameguy285 7 points8 points ago

i did this when i was a kid. misjudged the height of the ceiling fan and shattered glass rained down on me. the worst part was i had to explain to my parents how i broke it.

[–]pumpkindog 5 points6 points ago

did you explain them that at least you weren't the star wars kid?

[–]gameguy285 16 points17 points ago

sadly the star wars kid is what made me want to do it in the first place...

[–]Toribor 4 points5 points ago

"Damn, that dude is gangster. I would very much like to possess the same level of elite skills as this homie and will attempt to emulate his intense style."

[–]bitch_im_a_lion 2 points3 points ago

Seriously I think a lot of people did this when they were kids, they just didn't film it.

[–]yeahdanny 3 points4 points ago

Came for the star wars kid, was not disappointed.

[–]frostypillow 1 point2 points ago

i'm pretty sure he'd leave em with bearly any life in em.

[–]pseudolobster 20 points21 points ago

Ursa funny!

[–]thattaboychuk 7 points8 points ago

Kodiaktually be this good with a bo staff?

[–]closetcrazy 3 points4 points ago

They will surely need plenty of Bayer for the pain...

[–]Peartato59 1 point2 points ago

That'd be a grizzly sight to see.

[–]Violent_Milk -1 points0 points ago

I don't think I could bear to watch it.

[–]drl3743 -1 points0 points ago

Looks to me like he could conduct some serious Mauler. I'll show myself out.

[–]IChallengeYouToADuel 0 points1 point ago

Just make sure you don't try to Haydn the Bach.

[–]thesouthhighlander 23 points24 points ago

After being exiled for the 100 acre woods and from being disowned by yogi, this bear decided to join Smoky's team to squash all evil-doers. The Black Bear Begins

[–]Cybernetic_Sasquatch 11 points12 points ago

I hope Stephen Colbert sees this.

[–]maclebass 12 points13 points ago

WHAT? HOW?!

[–]Myattemptatlogic 12 points13 points ago

Well great. Now we've got invincible bears running around, rapin our churches, burnin our women.

[–]Art_Vandelay12 6 points7 points ago

I wonder if the bear has computer hacking skills too.

[–]splo0ge 2 points3 points ago

Honestly, this bear should be working in front of Papa John's / Cici's pizza / somewhere spinning a sign on the side of a road. It would sell.

Hmmm... Time to open a business with a bear.

[–]WisdomTooth8 4 points5 points ago

what makes it even better is it's one of those bears that has the batman shape on its chest...

[–]lazynothin 7 points8 points ago

Must be new to the internet... Welcome!

[–]Sergeantman94 3 points4 points ago

Colbert was right. Bears are a threat. Especially this one.

[–]reddits_paranoid_gf 3 points4 points ago

If anyone's wondering this is an asiatic bear

[–]frothydonkeysauce 3 points4 points ago

"You know, there's like a boat-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bow staff."

[–]Yabanjin 3 points4 points ago

I can't tell which is older, this or the dancing baby that was on Ally McBeal...

[–]jeanthine 4 points5 points ago

Man I am self-conscious enough about my firestaff routine without being shown up by a freaking bear.

EDIT: a word

[–]EvilSpunge23 6 points7 points ago

I think you mean self-conscious

[–]jeanthine 3 points4 points ago

ohgodI'msosorry

[–]bezjones 1 point2 points ago

Darth Mauled by a bear.

[–]IndigoGosRule 1 point2 points ago

So one of my friends has recently taken up bo staffing. This includes him swinging it around at 2am in the middle of his apartment complex. He keeps telling me how connected he feels while he's twirling that staff. I think he's going through some things...

[–]munch112000 1 point2 points ago

IS THIS THIS REAL? lol

[–]trevs231 1 point2 points ago

Damnit, its just a , not a "bo staff". People who actually practice traditional kobudo do not call it a bo staff.

[–]canadianclub[S] 0 points1 point ago

I was referencing Napoleon Dynamite. I studied Karate for several years and have used them several times, I'm sorry if I offended you though.

[–]trevs231 0 points1 point ago

Ah, well in that case you are forgiven. I haven't watched ND in so many years, i've nearly forgotten every reference. =P

[–]kareemabduljabbq 1 point2 points ago

beta testing on the new Wow expansion going pretty well.

[–]doombunny0 19 points20 points ago

Using his neck to twirl the lightsaber.... smart.

[–]Chocolateyummyness 4 points5 points ago

Read the title as "bro staff". That is all. :|

[–]doombunny0 1 point2 points ago

I thought i was the only one. Know that feel bo. EDIT: *Bro. Fuck.

[–]stewie650 2 points3 points ago

Bro fuck you say. Sure why not

[–]aaronrenoawesome 0 points1 point ago

Careful, he could be trying to bro-rape you.

[–]stewie650 0 points1 point ago

Its not rape if its willing. Besides my advice to someone trying to rape you, simply rape them back and stare directly into their eyes while you do it. Let them see how much you enjoy it in your eyes and make them regret the moment they tried to rape you.

[–]ineffable_internut 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, read it that way and came here expecting a lacrosse stick or something.

[–]ghostmutt 1 point2 points ago

Can someone explain how this is possible?

[–]Thefriendlyfaceplant -1 points0 points ago

Animal abuse. These bears are adopted by a sanctuary after they've been brutally trained to display this abnormal behaviour. The training is pretty close to torture and so traumatic that it completely fucks them up mentally.
The most common method is to get them dancing by putting them on hot iron plates repeatedly. Eventually they'll keep dancing without the hot plates.

[–]ghostmutt 0 points1 point ago

:( do not like

[–]Thefriendlyfaceplant 0 points1 point ago

Most people don't. I don't think this post would've been nearly as popular if people understood its origins.

[–]MxTINKxM 1 point2 points ago

Preparing for his fight with Kung Fu Panda

[–]adakis 1 point2 points ago

Colbert was right!

[–]hobofats 0 points1 point ago

2004 called. it wants its memes back.

[–]idogrammergoods 2 points3 points ago

This is such a repost it's already been on Tosh.O

Usually I tolerate reposts but god, this is so blatant.

[–]jingerninja 2 points3 points ago

already been on Tosh.O

BOOM! ROASTED!

[–]kentuckyhermit 1 point2 points ago

i upvoted you, so the world can hear your message.

[–]Vettit 0 points1 point ago

It's a moon bear :) Look 'em up- another species wrecked by traditional chinese medicine.

[–]Dump-Truck 0 points1 point ago

Soon they will rise up and strike back. They have been training for the confrontation.

[–]ratm_66 0 points1 point ago

Yup. Many spend their whole lives in a "crush cage" while a metal catheter drains their gall bladder.

And this is all totally legal and encouraged by the Chinese(and possibly other) governments.

[–]oxymoronisanoxymoron 0 points1 point ago

If it wasn't enough that they can rip you apart in a nanosecond they have wicked bo staff skills too. Welp.

[–]lulzy12 0 points1 point ago

Oh look, Kung-Fu... bear.

[–]Mofaux11 0 points1 point ago

Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills!

[–]jethroboom 0 points1 point ago

I heard he was practicing to try out for Rush replacing Neil Peart.

[–]beemario 0 points1 point ago

We are all doomed. Call your friends and family, say your prayers and prepare for the end...

[–]ninjawaffle99 0 points1 point ago

He's ready for the upcoming apocalypse.

[–]Hazardhunter 0 points1 point ago

If I tried this I'd probably just hit my head like 20 times.

[–]NPHisKing 0 points1 point ago

The fuck did I just witness?

[–]GiggityGiggidy 0 points1 point ago

This creature could spell out our doom. Our race has only one hope.

[–]durance84 0 points1 point ago

It's a Panderan Monk!

[–]sfdmfcssfd 0 points1 point ago

"You know, there's like a boat-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bow staff."

[–]ColCabbage 0 points1 point ago

[–]DeathAngelNick 0 points1 point ago

Looks like a costume...

[–]cjtheinvader 0 points1 point ago

I was about to do a slowpoke picture but then I realized that you looped it and figured eh.

[–]Asgard_Ranger 0 points1 point ago

Bears can detect odors 2100 times better than us, they can outrun even the fastest of us while weighing as much as the heaviest of us, and once caught, sever our spinal cord with a quick bite or a swipe of a paw.

They can hibernate.

But yeah, they can flip a stick like a human, a valuable trick in jail.

[–]jdepps113 0 points1 point ago

Don't fuck with that bear. Oh, wait, don't fuck with any bear.

[–]Soltheron 0 points1 point ago

Donatello! Stop impressing the tourists with your bear costume and get over here! Bebop might arrive at any moment with the mutagen!

[–]forgot_old_account 0 points1 point ago

Let's get down to business,

[–]Fanntastic 0 points1 point ago

Dude, this is so old it was on friggin Tosh.0

[–]melb3lle 0 points1 point ago

man Kilik better watch his back!

[–]TRH_42 0 points1 point ago

aww yeah! Cloud's mah boy!

[–]Wammis 0 points1 point ago

Hmm... Bear with a bo, or turtle with a bo? Who wins? Nevermind... just remembered the fact that this is an actual bear and Ninja Turtles don't exist... or do they? Okay... I need to stop typing every word that comes to mind. Now. Right now. Damn it. Fingers, don't want to listen to brain... wait,

[–]stuhfoo 0 points1 point ago

i used the word ninja and bear in the same sentence and described a realistic phenomenon!

[–]braves182 0 points1 point ago

Somebody watched tosh.o last night

[–]Mr_Narwhals 0 points1 point ago

Swag?

[–]Dentingerc16 0 points1 point ago

So this is how the world ends, when bears learn to pick up weapons, it will all be over

[–]ncshooter426 0 points1 point ago

He...does not rack disceprin.

[–]Deathgripsugar 0 points1 point ago

Wait, nobody has photoshopped glowsticks and put techno in the background?!

[–]Cablead 0 points1 point ago

It would seem his body is ready.

[–]OneLogiQ 0 points1 point ago

Bear Lee

[–]swampy13 0 points1 point ago

Fur sure.

[–]ac3jc 0 points1 point ago

someone please put a double ended lightsaber on this gif

[–]Mr_Rivers 0 points1 point ago

Thank god I live in England, where there is no right to bear arms

[–]troymtu 0 points1 point ago

... right to arm bears

FTFY

[–]belladonnadiorama 0 points1 point ago

That's trippy. We're using the Staff in Kung Fu this quarter as the weapon of choice. The bear should come to class sometime :D

[–]rplan039 0 points1 point ago

Oh fuck, I was already afraid of bears.

[–]brook011 0 points1 point ago

I can't bear to watch this.

[–]tinpanallegory 0 points1 point ago

[–]Willyferd 0 points1 point ago

Bow*

[–]NormSonOfAGunderson 0 points1 point ago

No Star Wars Kid references?

[–]antoonie28 0 points1 point ago

The real Kung Fo Panda!

[–]Stelththebomber 0 points1 point ago

OMFG I have seen this reposted atleast 10 times, everyone one the internet has seen it (even my grandma)... AAaaaaand it's on front page, faith in Reddit -10...

[–]creepingdeathv2 0 points1 point ago

Oh look! Bruce Lee reincarnated as a bear.

[–]frame_of_mind 0 points1 point ago

Was expecting Donatello.

[–]LightspeedChump 0 points1 point ago

I seen this happen live with a couple of Sun Bears at Edinburgh Zoo - I could've sworn they were duelling.

[–]Nicknam4 0 points1 point ago

Jesus christ Doc you've taken us back to 2006!

[–]spartaninspace 0 points1 point ago

There's that phrase again, did Jesus return in the future? Has Christianity not died out yet in the future?

[–]sailingonward 0 points1 point ago

Why does bear do that

[–]dailyfusion 0 points1 point ago

so if i repost this immediately, you think i'll make the front page? i'm picturing "first day on the internet kid" posting this. "oh my god, a bear with a bo staff, i bet nobody has seen this!"

[–]z0hu 0 points1 point ago

i remember seeing this on 4chan years ago and people deducing it was a guy in a suit, but i don't know the proof..

[–]redshirt55 0 points1 point ago

Teenage Mutant Ninja Bears!

[–]jesse950 0 points1 point ago

Kung-Fu Bear

[–]Guinness3102 0 points1 point ago

The ninjas are training bears now! We are fucked...

[–]Today_is_Thursday 0 points1 point ago

Nobody tell Stephen Colbert.

[–]sammyboyg 0 points1 point ago

they're adapting!

[–]IAmAtomato 0 points1 point ago

Don't you dare lie to us! Everyone knows bears don't live in Canadia!

[–]OurMisterBrooks 0 points1 point ago

I await the lightsabering.

[–]choseh 0 points1 point ago

this is my monk in act 2 inferno

[–]lostmyname 0 points1 point ago

Teenage Mutant Ninja Bears. Bearatello, reporting for pizza.

[–]ToAGasChamberGo 0 points1 point ago

Bears, now with more dangerous!

[–]did_you_read_it 0 points1 point ago

is this a teaser for the latest DreamWorks film?

[–]heybebeh88 0 points1 point ago

Hey, that's not a panda!

[–]hcgator 0 points1 point ago

Saw Kung Fu Panda 1 and 2 . . . was inspired.

[–]mp07d 0 points1 point ago

Kong fu panda?? Nigga please

[–]congascribe 0 points1 point ago

I was like, "There's no way he knows Wu Dang style." and then realized it was cool, only Shaolin.

[–]spatchbo 0 points1 point ago

For the first time reddit has stolen from Tosh. I never thought I'd see the day. Btw I'd totally kung fu fight that bear.

[–]canadianclub[S] 0 points1 point ago

I went to bed with 18 upvotes, woke up to this. Did it make the front page?

Edit: Also I'm sorry about this being a repost. I'd never seen it on Reddit (or anywhere else before today), and I thought some people would enjoy it.

[–]jcsimpson 0 points1 point ago

Donatello does machines.

[–]brunq2 0 points1 point ago

This further proves what I already know... DO NOT fuck with bears.

[–]EmptheBear 0 points1 point ago

Most of us Bears practice martial arts daily. The world's a dangerous place, always good to know how to defend yourself.

[–]mgrifone 0 points1 point ago

All of that without opposable thumbs

[–]SirDigbyChicknCeasar 0 points1 point ago

He can play Little John in the live action remake of Disney's Robin Hood.

[–]h-town21 0 points1 point ago

thats ridiculous...

[–]blowinbacksout 0 points1 point ago

girls like bears with skills

[–]TGOT 0 points1 point ago

As opposed to its lesser-known cousin, the bo sword.

[–]fannyalgersabortion 0 points1 point ago

Something something the right to armed bears.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]Breathing_Balls 5 points6 points ago

A cage fight is needed to prove it's worth.

Bear Grylls VS Bear Growls

Get it on......

[–]jsnoogs 0 points1 point ago

So old that it was on tosh.o

[–]oldschoolrobot 0 points1 point ago

This bear is clearly training to be a jedi.

[–]Khue 0 points1 point ago

Welp, we're all pretty much fucked.

[–]posermobile89 0 points1 point ago

Are you fucking kidding me?!

[–]jgrone1 0 points1 point ago

The real kung fu panda.

[–]synth22 0 points1 point ago

We've already got Bear cavalry riding on horses. This is just scary.

[–]DangerMouseToby 0 points1 point ago

He will get all the girl bears.