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all 79 comments

[–]Spatchmo 85 points86 points ago

Hey, for all you know Stacy and Cthulhu could form the bonds of a successful relationship. They'll flirt playfully via text message for a few days until Cthulhu finally works up the nerve to ask her on a real date. He'll be a perfect gentleman. They'll share their ambitions and dreams for the future. They'll start hanging out after school in Stacy's back yard and take a dip in her mediocre above-ground swimming pool. That summer will be the best of their young lives. But it won't last. Because Cthulhu has desires that Stacy can't fulfill. He'll outgrow her. Then one day, her mom will get back from a business trip. "Is she there," he'll ask, "or is she trying to give me the slip? You know, I'm not the little boy that I used to be. I'm all grown up now. Baby, can't you see? Stacy's mom has got it goin' on."

[–]Mutericator 10 points11 points ago

I can't upvote this hard enough. Well played, good sir.

[–]onlylurking 4 points5 points ago

In her dreams...

[–]rajjak 67 points68 points ago

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points ago

That's how I lost my best friend.

[–]moxiedrinker82 14 points15 points ago

This is why you don't download bears!

[–]Eats_Beef_Steak 4 points5 points ago

You wouldn't download a car.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

Not illegally at least. That's why I have I have a Auto theft record.

[–]thisisdog321 7 points8 points ago

There are no sexual predators on the internet anymore, they've all been scared off by Cthulhu and his pet bears. Good guy Cthulu

[–]sydneygamer 0 points1 point ago

Scumbag Cthulu.

Scares away other sexual predators, to take you for himself.

[–]thisisdog321 1 point2 points ago

Me and Cthulhu have something special!

[–]sydneygamer 0 points1 point ago

I didn't know bears could type. This has been an eye-opening experience.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]markandspark 1 point2 points ago

Go back to 2008 and stay there

[–]TheFAJ 67 points68 points ago

I normally don't go for these Ad Council things, but this one R'lyeh got me.

[–]Copperman 31 points32 points ago

This is what we get when they put love into their craft.

[–]moxiedrinker82 10 points11 points ago

I see what you did there, but I think you suffer from "too many words inn mouth."

[–]DasMuchomas 5 points6 points ago

I'm glad someone decided to be the Reanimator of this meme

[–]Chrthulhu 9 points10 points ago

All of these puns are Old Ones.

[–]Crjbsgwuehryj 3 points4 points ago

I dun know wich pun is the worst

[–]Rawler 1 point2 points ago

Knock it off, dagonit.

[–]CANDLE_IN_MY_PEEHOLE 15 points16 points ago

The "Holy fucking shit." made me laugh so insanely hard.

[–]needz 15 points16 points ago

"It was about the time that I realize dat that girl scout wasn't a girl scout at all, but a 3 story tall monster from the paleolithic era. He wanted about tree fiddy."

[–]Danthetroll 5 points6 points ago

I have heard the call of Cthulhu and he tells me that this is a lie and our visits and rituals are fine. Praise him... Praise him...

[–]enriquesford 5 points6 points ago

wasn't going to read, but then i noticed "MOTHERFUCKING, and HOLY FUCKING SHIT"

[–]sydneygamer 1 point2 points ago

That's exact reaction I would have if I my internet best friend turned out to be Cthulu.

[–]GeorgeOlduvai 5 points6 points ago

ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

[–]jojojoy 1 point2 points ago

Ia! Ia!

[–]Neoxite23 2 points3 points ago

Well he did save the world and all.

[–]phnglui_mglwnafh 2 points3 points ago

Ia! Ia! Cthulhu Fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn! Ia!

[–]frankcast554 -1 points0 points ago

I think your cat got hold of your computer.

[–]Shinhan 1 point2 points ago

Also, be careful not to get in love with a Monster Boy

[–]Indycoone 1 point2 points ago

I saw this 2 years ago! I've been looking for it since!

Thank you! :D

[–]ThatIsMyHat 1 point2 points ago

From Something Awful, if I recall.

[–]heptakaideka 1 point2 points ago

Reminded me of this episode.

[–]thebayway 1 point2 points ago

Hide your kids...hide your wife.

[–]Winterclaw 1 point2 points ago

I read all those commas as full stops.

[–]lols 0 points1 point ago

Oh wow, the commas, they're everywhere, stopping your reading flow, like crazy!

[–]Winterclaw 0 points1 point ago

I know, right? It's crazy, we can't live, in a society, like this.

[–]paranode 2 points3 points ago

I was pleased until I saw this made-up word predatation.

[–]SamWhite 0 points1 point ago

It's a typo of predation.

[–]FnJomo 0 points1 point ago

Damn it BP!

[–]robhob 0 points1 point ago

I so expected him to just be interested in her mum.

[–]Dillingo 0 points1 point ago

The great Cthulhu will rise again!

[–]omnilynx 0 points1 point ago

Surely if you want to stop them losing their sanity you should not educate them about Cthulhu.

[–]SaveKenny 0 points1 point ago

Picture not posted on imgur??? What sorcery is that?!?!

[–]Tre4_G 0 points1 point ago

Stacy thought she had met an innocent Ood online... turned out to be a Cthulhu.

[–]NotLurking101 0 points1 point ago

he's climbing in yo windows! snatching yo people up!

[–]dumbgaytheist 0 points1 point ago

Teach your children about commas.

[–]tartcouplet 0 points1 point ago

Stacy Griffith was the name of a girl that went to my high school. She pooped in a closet.

[–]Kalthor 0 points1 point ago

http://www.amazon.de/FUCK-WITH-CTHULHU-T-Shirt-Schwarz/dp/B002Q1MG7Q

The best gift for everyone! Even when it's from the german Amazonsite

[–]Mudjekeewis 0 points1 point ago

Needs more periods.

[–]ISeeYourOtherHand 0 points1 point ago

Those were commas. Admittedly, they did look like periods.

[–]dlawnro 0 points1 point ago

Whoever designed the commas for that font needs to be fed to the watery deeps.

[–]danoll 0 points1 point ago

This would be a good idea for a movie. Meets someone they were chatting with online. Turns out to be a real life monster. Dark comedy anyone?

[–]LFK1236 0 points1 point ago

The background picture ruined it - where's the surprise if we already knew what was going to happen?

Still funny, but there's no way to avoid an image spanning pretty much the entire graphic...

[–]drspod 0 points1 point ago

lower the contrast on your monitor

[–]ndchristie 0 points1 point ago

Wait, how did this setup not manage to produce a "Stacy's Mom" joke.

I feel like I've been reverse-trolled, as if searching for Rick Astley and getting an awesome video instead...

[–]Vidyogamasta 0 points1 point ago

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/ue18z/protect_your_children/c4ummzw

Posted ~4 hours before your comment. You musta missed it.

[–]T_Dumbsford 0 points1 point ago

This would be hilarious without the Lovecraft!

[–]fort_knox 0 points1 point ago

I'm almost positive this was the first image on the internet. And because it's so old, I'm going to be incredibly pompous about it.

[–]aesamattki 0 points1 point ago

What's with periods instead of commas?

[–]frankcast554 0 points1 point ago

All hail Cthulu!..

[–]redrum3567 0 points1 point ago

Oi! Have some respect for the old gods!!! Cthulhu Fhtagn!

[–]Ragingmoon46 0 points1 point ago

X-post from r/Cthulhu

[–]Kitguy 0 points1 point ago

IT WAS MOTHERFUCKING KENNY. HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

[–]shiniren 0 points1 point ago

These are perfect ADs.

[–]gonnaflynow 0 points1 point ago

Hide your kids, hide your wife.

[–]underdabridge 0 points1 point ago

I used to be awed by the Old Ones until I saw one of those Scale of the Universe things. Now I look at Cthulhu and think the old ones are just swamp rats on our ant hill.

[–]grizzlyman54 -1 points0 points ago

THIS IS ALL CAPS HILARIOUS..but seriously, i lol'd.

[–]sydneygamer -1 points0 points ago

I laughed way harder than I should have at "Holy fucking shit."

[–]primitive-ambience -2 points-1 points ago

please, just stop already

[–]thebeardsman -3 points-2 points ago

It's ok, i will slay cthulu.

[–]jojojoy 2 points3 points ago

And how will you undertake this?