all 156 comments

[–]bricewgilbert 61 points62 points ago

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Just to clarify. It's from an episode of "Louie". Not a random skit online, or a real segment on Fox News. The whole episode is about his love of masturbation and how this woman can abstain from it for God. He questions if it would be good to perhaps abstain and wait for the perfect love to satisfy those cravings. Is that realistic or good? The show does not answer that. I won't spoil what it does say.

It's probably in the top 5 of best shows on TV right now.

[–]Grantagonist 2 points3 points ago

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So sick of seeing this episode's screen-comics appear here over and over.

Are there so many new Redditors that haven't seen this yet?

[–]midnitte 0 points1 point ago

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I believe he dates the chick too, but doesn't wanna wait to have sex

[–]kckid2599 0 points1 point ago

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I wouldn't of thought this clarification necessary if I didn't have a friend send me a clip of this skit, thinking it was real.....

[–]stickmaleboy 0 points1 point ago

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Yes, I agree about the top 5 thing.

I would say the other 4 shows are Mad Men, Homeland, Breaking Bad, and Parks and Recreation.

[–]dylan522p 1 point2 points ago

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Game of Thrones!?!?!?!?

[–]stickmaleboy 0 points1 point ago

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See that show is amazing, but I can't see myself replacing any of the shows I listed with it.

[–]dylan522p 0 points1 point ago

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I've seen all of those except Parks and Recreation. Maybe that's why I didn't put it in my top 5.

[–]elbruce 0 points1 point ago

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Community.

[–]stickmaleboy 0 points1 point ago

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I love community but it isn't very consistent.

Or at least, not as consistent as Parks and Recreation.

[–]Godfodder 176 points177 points ago

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Not to be a killjoy, but he's said much funnier and smarter things.

[–]Teiresias666 37 points38 points ago

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This was my first thought...if it had been real, it would have been pretty quick thinking, but as a planned out skit, he has DEFINITELY delivered better material. Not his best at all.

[–]Ijustlostmyjengajam 9 points10 points ago

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In Louie he always talks in a bumbling, awkward way. It wouldn't be in character for him to be firing off snappy one-liners all the time.

[–]ChadwickHenryWard 6 points7 points ago

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I didn't think it was funny when it aired. When it started popping up on Reddit, I was astonished.

[–]TheClassGenius -2 points-1 points ago

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Not sure why you were astonished. These people don't have incredible senses of humor (i.e., see top comment).

EDIT at the time of posting, this was top comment.

[–]shnnrr 13 points14 points ago

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I'm starting to view people who get down voted as martyrs of sorts

[–]Abby__Normal 0 points1 point ago

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I have to concur - funny, but I wouldn't say his best...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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This was a great skit though. It had too much of a feel of unreality to it, but the idea was inspired.

[–]Ragnalypse 0 points1 point ago

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This sounds much more like the musings of a christian eight-year-old... definitely not his best.

[–]bouchard -2 points-1 points ago

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I've yet to hear or read anything funny said by this guy. I don't know why people keep linking to him.

[–]Godfodder 1 point2 points ago

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Have you given him a solid chance, like with his stand-up? I think he's hilarious. There's not too many comedians who can get away with calling people faggots.

[–]bouchard 0 points1 point ago

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I have. I thought maybe the quotes were only funny for the people who actually heard him say it, like most of the joke was in the buildup (which makes sense, that's how standup comics usually work). So I watched some videos of his standup on YouTube, but I still didn't find him funny. Not even to the point of cracking a smile.

[–]JimmerUK 100 points101 points ago

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This has been posted load of times, and misses the best bit where he tells her that next time he masturbates he'll be thinking if her.

[–]BuckeyeBentley 27 points28 points ago

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[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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I made this my profile picture on facebook the day this hit the front page.

ninja edit: holy shit that was 9 months ago.

[–]randomintandem 40 points41 points ago

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This post is like herpes. It just keeps coming back.

[–]mbermudez918 96 points97 points ago

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[–]nomogoodnames 8 points9 points ago

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I've seen that picture way too many damn times, it gets reposted like hell!

[–]QuarksnShit 15 points16 points ago

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I clicked all three, I don't know what I was expecting.

[–]dharrison21 2 points3 points ago

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RES.

[–]Ferga93 10 points11 points ago

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[–]phenetix 6 points7 points ago

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[–]stormblast 3 points4 points ago

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[–]Eppsmayne 6 points7 points ago

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Seriously how do you redditors come up with such funny jokes?

[–]Winkstur 2 points3 points ago

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But I laugh and enjoy it every time.

[–]yesimquiteserious 2 points3 points ago

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I've never seen it. Upvoted it hard.

[–]nakedsteve4u 0 points1 point ago

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and you missed the most significant part about his comment

[–]Xanzent 4 points5 points ago

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And there's nothing she can do about it.

[–]CanIGetaHellYeah -1 points0 points ago

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Wow, way to fly the athiest flag and make us look sick and twisted. Go Louis ! Reddit users will love you no matter what you do

[–]apullin -1 points0 points ago

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I was just going to say ... someone can now repost that outside of /r/atheism ...

[–]AlwayzFree 21 points22 points ago

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"Masturbating is really important to you.."

"Yeah! It is, it keeps me sane, I'm a good citizen, I'm a good father, I recycle and I masturbate... and I'm proud of it."

[–]yourfrigginguide 25 points26 points ago

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Someone post the video I forgot the title

[–]schuanky[S] 49 points50 points ago

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[–]flyguysd 12 points13 points ago

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I love how cute and innocent she is. ....I'll be right back.

[–]Orangemongoose1 6 points7 points ago

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"She's an angel. I want her to drown in my cum"

-Louis CK

[–]koolkats 1 point2 points ago

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Shakespeare definitely

[–]bigrivertea 1 point2 points ago

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Thanks.

[–]karmus -3 points-2 points ago

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"Thank you both for coming..." what a priceless way to end that segment. The look in the hosts eye when he says it is way too knowing for coincidence.

[–]theLinKuei 11 points12 points ago

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You do realize this isn't real, right?

[–]Megan_Bee -1 points0 points ago

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lol "Masturbating is really important to you, isn't it?"

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Ellipsicle 5 points6 points ago

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It isnt

[–]TimeZarg -3 points-2 points ago

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No, it's just another bible-thumping airhead who looks waaaay too damn good :(

[–]apajx 5 points6 points ago

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I know this is a repost and everything, and high-horse redditors or whatever.

But this should actually have upvotes, since this is the first thing I (and probably others) wanted.

[–]Blaaarghh 6 points7 points ago

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Doesn't this mean he also watches gay porn?

[–]diddybop22 0 points1 point ago

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that means he would see all the completely disgusting and horrid things... like things you'd see in /r/wtf or /r/enoughinternet. god is dirty.

[–]Blaaarghh 1 point2 points ago

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He is sick, I mean he created all those people in his own image right? So every post on every sic...erm special subreddit is just a special piece of god that you aren't in touch with...

[–]diddybop22 0 points1 point ago

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exactly. i think christians should spend more time in these subreddits. and spend more time on 4chan....

[–]Knight of /newdumnezero 1 point2 points ago

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or /r/spacedicks and /r/clopclop ?

NOTE: NSFW, NSFL links.

[–]diddybop22 0 points1 point ago

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lolz you killed me with /r/ClopClop

[–]shamblingman 5 points6 points ago

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This episode keeps getting reposted. I think some of you might be missing the point of that episode.

After the interview, he spends time with her. Sees her as a real person who truly believes and practices what she preaches and winds up looking like an ass when he puts a move on her.

I'm athiest, but I'd rather not take items out of context to fit our beliefs.

[–]wheest 4 points5 points ago

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With how much this is posted I would go to assume there are a sizeable amount of people who think this is a real clip of him "owning those fox news guys". It's from his show.

[–]ComfortableNumb 1 point2 points ago

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That's exactly what I figured.

[–]phdre 21 points22 points ago

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You do know this is from a skit?

[–]schuanky[S] -2 points-1 points ago

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yes? but its still hilarious.

[–]-WR_Mr_Waffles- 2 points3 points ago

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What's the name of the video.

[–]Zayl 1 point2 points ago

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Forget which episode, but it happens in his "Louie" series. It's funny, dark, and just overall absolutely fantastic to watch. It's two seasons and I think it's been signed for a third. I definitely suggest checking it out.

[–]Knight of /newdumnezero 0 points1 point ago

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it's cheating...

[–]bultonic 2 points3 points ago

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Can we please stop rehashing the same Loius C.K sketch here? Its getting pretty old. New material please?

[–]discreet1 2 points3 points ago

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Someone should post this again.

[–]niczar 0 points1 point ago

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No, this is /r/atheism, someone should repost this as a Facebook screenshot.

[–]elmarko44 2 points3 points ago

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fucking hell... how many times will this be reposted?

[–]ok_you_win 4 points5 points ago

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Legit question: she had a lot of lady balls to play the part she did: has she done any other acting of note? What is her name, so I can look her up on IMDB?

[–]bultonic 20 points21 points ago

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Translation: Does she have any naked scenes?

[–]Connorables 2 points3 points ago

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This still needs to be answered. Please.

[–]ok_you_win -1 points0 points ago

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This is why I like /r/atheism. People speak their minds freely.

bultonic, I only want to see what you want to see.

[–]Workahol 1 point2 points ago

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Yes, she will be in a new tv show, apparently- Liz Holtan, IMDB

Source: I know her whole family, yo.

[–]ok_you_win 1 point2 points ago

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Once upon a time I worked in a bar. I said something a little coarse to a tall pretty blonde who was a regular.

An older lady said to me "You shouldnt talk like that". I said "Oh its ok, I know her whole family."

She looked at me and said, "Thats funny, I happen to be her mother."

Whoops.

Liz Holtan is pretty, and as I said, it took some nerve to portray that character. Its pretty easy to be typecast by a role like that. So pretty face and maybe boobs aside, I'm curious about her acting chops. Thanks for the name and link.

[–]Workahol 0 points1 point ago

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She is extremely pretty, which is probably why she continues to get work. Helluva voice too- did musical theater and was in Redefined if I remember right (you might know them from this video). This upcoming tv show might make or break her. But her hometown would like to be known for something other than being where Screech lives (lived?). Otherwise, they'll be known for Screech and that one girl Louis C.K. said he'd masturbate to on his show.

tl;dr- She has talent but just hasn't had the right role to show off what all she has.

[–]BreadstickNinja 0 points1 point ago

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Introduce us? I will bone the Christ right out of her.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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I don't think this was even supposed to be funny. If you think this is Louie's best, I urge you to watch like, any of his other material.

[–]JDX3DS 1 point2 points ago

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This has been posted load of times, and misses the part where it was scripted.

[–]truthie 1 point2 points ago

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You know absolutely nothing of his comedy or work if you believe that headline.

[–]lactosefree1 1 point2 points ago

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A repost at its best.

[–]CosmicBard 1 point2 points ago

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Repost this. Sure, be a jerkass.

But at least spell the fucking man's name correctly.

[–]Carrotsaregood 1 point2 points ago

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I always feel when people start clipping bits and pieces of entire shows and post them online, the people who don't watch the show and don't know the context are just turned off if it isn't a completely knock you on your ass joke. This is not very funny unless you actually watch the show and know the character and context of the episode.

[–]TazD 1 point2 points ago

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Came for the joke, stayed for the blonde

[–]ColeWouldSay 1 point2 points ago

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Wasn't this a skit anyways..?

[–]shewhisperedtome 1 point2 points ago

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this isn't a real news segment and you should feel bad for posting this

[–]mufasa27 3 points4 points ago

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He would have a hard time jerking it to the porn I create.

Non-existent.

[–]udbluehens 5 points6 points ago

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thats perfect for god...

[–]bigrivertea 8 points9 points ago

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So if I'm masturbating and gods watching me while his masturbating. Circle jerk with God?

[–]AfricanBurrito 5 points6 points ago

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Dutch Rudder with the Lord.

[–]techgeek1221 0 points1 point ago

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(slow clap)

[–]Discord_agent 0 points1 point ago

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[–]alittler -2 points-1 points ago

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Hah! Hah!

[–]myrden 1 point2 points ago

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And that's where sleet comes from kids.

[–]c0lin46and2 1 point2 points ago

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That chick was so hot in that episode. I hope she does nude work sometime.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2949677/

This should get us started... OK, go.

[–]hercs95 0 points1 point ago

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....And that's where rain comes from

[–]Samtember9 0 points1 point ago

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A great episode that further on takes away the religious evils of masturbation and offers an actual argument on why it might be bad.

[–]moccio 0 points1 point ago

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Wasn't actually ever on Fox News.

[–]omizzle4shizzle 0 points1 point ago

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Just a heads up that this didn't actually happen, it was on his show Louie. Still hilarious though.

[–]backyardlion 0 points1 point ago

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This is sensational, but definitely not his best.

[–]ThomasRoll 0 points1 point ago

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I would break her in two.

[–]Shumuu 0 points1 point ago

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Repost.

[–]MightySasquatch 0 points1 point ago

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Also for those who have seen the video, the acting is horrible on all sides and there isn't very good delivery either. Much better videos out there, look for the clip of him describing the girl that enjoys rape fantasies.

[–]surfnaked 0 points1 point ago

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She looks like that little baby chick who discovers how funky boys are in all their nosepickin' snotty glory. Completely undone. Louie was kind of crass. She was priceless.

[–]DishwasherTwig 0 points1 point ago

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That looks like a fancy Rachel McAdams

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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With every joke that's posted of Louis CK the more and more I'm unimpressed.

[–]Durkki 0 points1 point ago

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Well that's a bit immature.

[–]moriquendo 0 points1 point ago

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It's not only god. Ceiling Cat (and god knows who else) is watching you too!

[–]Anjinsanx 0 points1 point ago

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I hated this when i first saw it, when i realised it was 'fake' if you will, i hated it even more. I still hate it. Its bad

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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i swear i saw her in a porno last night acting as a 24 year old eastern european 'virgin'

[–]JAKZILLASAURUS 0 points1 point ago

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hothothothothothothothothothothothothot.........hot

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]sneeper 0 points1 point ago

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The show is named Louie. Louie is a common nickname for people named Louis.

[–]CanIGetaHellYeah 0 points1 point ago

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Reddit circle jerking over Louie CK at it's best

[–]ClusterMakeLove 0 points1 point ago

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I've seen this interview, and the anti-playing-with-yourself advocate does not come off as a real person, so much as a sexless cooky charicature. I've always just assumed it's a sketch. Am I wrong?

[–]JDX3DS 0 points1 point ago

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WHY DOES NO ONE REALIZE THIS WAS SCRIPTED?

[–]FuckRepostingCunts 0 points1 point ago

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Good job, I'm happy you took the time to repost this.

[–]cumfarts -2 points-1 points ago

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This has even less to do with atheism than the usual shit that has nothing to do with atheism that gets posted here.

[–]sweeptheaorta -1 points0 points ago

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She's pretty hot, but I suppose the hot ones are always crazy

[–]bittlelum 6 points7 points ago

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Or actresses.

[–]remton_asq -2 points-1 points ago

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Louie CK is such a classy guy.

[–]howsweettobeanidiot -2 points-1 points ago

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she's good-looking, a shame EDIT: Poe's got me, I thought she was too well-composed. That makes CK's jokes a little less impressive due to lack of spontaneity, but it's still a good watch.

[–]dominicbri7 -1 points0 points ago

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This show was a joke by the way

[–]iambobbydennis -1 points0 points ago

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Let me guess...first time on reddit?

OP- "omg...this is too funny! I gotta show everyone on reddit this!"

[–]destinys_parent -1 points0 points ago

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Who is that girl? She is hot.

[–]TilDuh -1 points0 points ago

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[–]Mc_Graw -1 points0 points ago

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Why does such a pretty girl have to be such a fucking eejit?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points ago

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not funny, just since God is mentioned in a negative (sort of) way, you post it on r/atheist and of course you get up votes from the atheist sheep. this goes to prove that mob mentality is a human thing not a religious side effect.

[–]iwtkalag -1 points0 points ago

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I saw this. Her name was ACTUALLY Ellen Fapped

[–]chingyduster -2 points-1 points ago

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Am I the only one that realizes it's a comedy skit?

[–]DoctorLost173 -2 points-1 points ago

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Typical atheist bullshit

[–]praiselordjesus -2 points-1 points ago

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Louie CK is a real asset to down-to-earth, rational atheism everywhere. As a non-hateful Christian, I thoroughly approve! MASTURBATION IS NORMAL!

[–]VagrantVirgin -2 points-1 points ago

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this made my day, still ROFLMAO

[–]niczar 1 point2 points ago

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What does ROFLMAO mean?

[–]VagrantVirgin 0 points1 point ago

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http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/ROFLMAO

Contraction of ROFL + LMAO.

[–]niczar 0 points1 point ago

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What does "rhetorical" mean?